Page 15

15

ROWAN

Dressed for the day, I waited for Nerys by the window, though no visions came to me this morning. After we returned last eve, I had difficulty sleeping. Grandfather was gone. For some reason, I was now The Keeper, a responsibility no amount of training could have prepared me for. And then there was Nerys. She’d realized what I had: that more than the future of her own people was at stake in her decision to challenge the queen. If Lirael did not plan to offer Galfrid and Mev use of the Tidal Pearl, the future of Elydor remained in peril.

Eventually, I had fallen into a fitful slumber, my dreams of a very different variety.

Twice now, I’d held Nerys in my arms. Twice, I’d not wanted to let her go. It was more than desire, more than lust, although more than once throughout the day, I’d imagined what it would be like to strip every bit of clothing from her and bring Nerys pleasure.

Her knock came at a most unfortunate time. I forced my mind to wander to less erotic thoughts, but it was still a moment or two before I could comfortably make my way to the door. Opening it, despite that Nerys could have easily done so since she had a key to my chamber, I groaned.

“Nerys.”

I turned away and headed back into my chamber. Sitting on my bed, I took a deep breath, appalled at my own lack of control.

She came inside and stood in front of me, genuinely confused.

“Have I done something to offend you?”

She truly did not know how she affected me. I took in the fitted, sleeveless and legless training tunic, the black and seafoam green making her eyes shine brighter than usual. Black boots covered her legs, up to mid-thigh at least, her gloves doing the same for her arms. A decorative, belt-like piece rested at her hips, adding a touch of sophistication. She looked like a warrior of the sea, prepared for battle, though not the kind of battle to which I was accustomed.

“I’ve never seen such a garment before.”

Nerys looked down, as if seeing herself for the first time. “Likely because this is for training—surprisingly warm too given how little it covers.”

“The other day, when the young ones were training…”

I let my voice trail. Though on purpose. Being “speechless” held more meaning than ever before. Turned out, it was not merely hyperbole.

“They trained for the morning. I plan to be at the water’s edge all day and do not wish to be encumbered. Which is what I’ve come to ask you. Would you prefer to remain here?—”

“I am coming with you.”

Her eyes widened. “There will be naught for you to do but watch me.”

“I can think of no more pleasurable activity than watching you.” I stopped short of saying, in that , but was fairly certain the actual words were unnecessary.

Nerys cocked her head to the side, clearly doubtful. And then, the worst possible thing that could have happened, did. Her eyes darted from me to the bed. Groaning, I stood, needing to move. Unfortunately, I startled her, standing so abruptly that Nerys stumbled backward.

I caught her by the elbow as our eyes met.

Her lips parted, and not for the first time, I wanted to kiss her. Wanted it so badly that I pushed aside every reason not to. Nerys’s destiny and mine might have crossed paths, but both those paths would diverge. Mine as The Keeper in Estmere. Hers here, potentially as the next Thalassarian queen.

Even so, I did not move away.

“The heartbreak,” she whispered, “of falling for a human is one I would avoid.”

I released my grip on her elbow but still did not move. “I would not dishonor you by taking advantage of our proximity, knowing I am not long in Thalassaria.”

There it was. Our reasons for not leaning into one another and taking what we desired. For there was no doubt that Nerys and I desired the same thing.

One of us had to step away.

There is no greater honor than to be chosen to carry and protect the secrets of our ancestors. To see our future and guide humans toward their rightful place in Elydor.

I could hear my grandfather’s words as if he stood there and spoke them aloud to me. It was his strength, and not my own, that allowed me to take a step, and then another, away from her. With a firmer resolve than before, despite the most enticing vision in front of me, I asked the obvious question.

“What do you train for?”

In response, Nerys walked toward the very window I’d been staring out of since coming here. Though I joined her, I was careful to put enough distance between us as not to be tempted to reach out. To touch her again. To pull Nerys into me.

To take what we both wanted but neither could afford to have.

With a flick of her wrist, a silencing mist formed all around us.

“It was not far from there,” she said, pointing into the distance. “Where a fishing vessel overturned. Some storms, even the strongest Thalassarian cannot calm. None worried for the men aboard, as all were experienced water-wielders and they were close to shore. One by one, they rode waves back to that dock. Except for one.”

Nerys’s hands balled into fists.

“What happened?”

“He was young, had not seen fifteen summers yet. The others returned to the shore, thinking they’d all made it back, but the young one’s abilities were no match for the storm. He hung onto a piece of debris as the ship’s captain debated whether or not to save him.”

She was becoming angrier as the story unfolded.

“Why on Elydor would he not save him?”

When Nerys looked at me, though anger still lingered, there was resolve in her expression too.

“Unfortunately, the queen was on the dock, preparing for a voyage to Aetheria. She forbade it, saying that the sea was a trial, and if he couldn’t master it himself then it wasn’t for anyone to take the burden from him. You see, she believes in balance. That Thalassarians must master the sea without relying on others, or they weaken themselves. But it wasn’t about balance that day.”

“What was it about?” I asked, almost afraid of the answer.

“He was half-human. And though born with the Thalassarian abilities of his father, he struggled to master the sea as quickly as he might have otherwise.”

“And you believe that was the reason she did not want him to be rescued?”

Nerys frowned. “Some believe so, aye. I do not think it was so straightforward as that. The queen is well known to take such a stance. For us to rely on no others, we must be strong. And though I do value independence, neither do I believe seeking aid is a weakness. The queen would disagree, however.”

“Did he survive?”

Nerys smiled for the first time since she began her story. “He did. The captain, in defiance of the queen, rescued him. And would have been punished for it if there was not an uprising that found Queen Lirael more at odds with her people than ever before in her reign. At least, that is what I am told.”

“You were not there when it happened?”

“No. But the story has haunted me. Last eve, when you spoke of your grandfather and said, ‘He was the best of men,’ I thought of the boy, clinging to life on a piece of driftwood. Of you, and the other humans I’ve met. Good people who do not deserve to be locked inside a bedchamber because of the queen’s fear.”

I hadn’t thought of it before, but her words made sense. “Gyorians, Aetherians are not locked inside, as I am?”

“No,” she confirmed. “It would do little good as they would be able to easily escape. There are ways to… subdue their powers. But it is considered unseemly to use them, unless in battle.”

I glanced about my chamber. My prison. “In some ways, your queen is no better than King Balthor.”

Nerys’s laugh was harsh, not at all one of joy. “In many ways, though hers are more subtle. And of course, closing the Gate after kidnapping King Galfrid’s partner cemented him as the ultimate villain of Elydor in terms of his hatred of humans.”

My gazed wandered from Nerys’s face downward. How could I not possibly notice how enticing she looked this way? I imagined her with naught but those boots, beneath me on the bed…

“As to the reason I tell you this story.”

My head snapped back up, and though I didn’t believe she caught me staring, I couldn’t be certain. I would tell her there was so much more to her allure than simply Nerys’s beauty, that the resolve in her eyes, the love Nerys had for her people… Instead, I remained silent, knowing naught could come from such words.

“You asked what I train for today.”

Somehow, I’d forgotten the question. With Nerys, it was easy to forget, if even for a moment, the pain of losing a man I loved and admired, the mission that brought me here… all of it.

“I have known for some years that my power exceeds the queen’s. And I supposed it was my hope she would put out the call, knowing there is one among her more powerful. But she has not, and I’ve delayed the inevitable, afraid for myself. Having you here”—she sighed—“I am more afraid for our future under her continued rule and know, if naught else, I would lead with more compassion than she. My parents would will it for me. For all of us.”

“You train to challenge the queen.”

It was not a question, and there was no need for Nerys to respond.

I wanted to tell her of my vision. That her decision had already been foretold. Instead, I offered all that I was able.

“I will aid you in any way that I can. And when you are queen of Thalassaria, together, we will forge a new path for our people that strengthens us both.”

“Perhaps our paths were meant to cross, for this purpose,” Nerys said as she strode across my chamber with purpose and determination.

“Perhaps,” I whispered, knowing our respective roles also meant we were destined never to be together. “Nerys?” I asked as the mist faded and she reached the door. “The young one, who nearly drowned. What became of him?”

Her secret smile made me even more curious.

“Think on it. I am certain you know the answer already.”