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BLAKELY

I try not to think about my childhood too much. Not the bad memories or the good ones, because reminding yourself of what isn’t here anymore hasn’t ever helped anyone.

With Jamie, it became easier not to stray to that blocked-off section in my mind. He keeps me busy, distracted. Happier than I’ve ever been, past and present. I was in a fairy-tale world the past few weeks where for the first time in forever, I was content with only looking forward, excited about what was to come.

Maybe that was my first mistake.

If I had paid more attention to my past instead of writing it off, I wouldn’t have let my mom surprise me. I’d have been expecting her to pull herself out of the gutter and show up again once things had finally changed for us. It was only a matter of time before she found something in my life worth ruining.

The one thing I could have happily kept forever.

Jamie, with his winks and booming laugh, the heart of gold that could break the world’s largest scale, and arms that I could have stayed in for decades, is the first person besides Nate that I’m willing to sacrifice everything for.

Even if it’s my happiness hanging in the balance.

He kisses me with an eagerness that makes me feel cherished, like I’m someone to him that he can’t stand thinking about not having in his life. That almost makes everything worse.

Almost . Because right now, I’m not prepared to focus on anything but giving my heart what it wants, and that’s him soul-deep inside of me.

Jamie holds me with a firm but gentle touch while encouraging me to seat myself on his lap. He’s hard beneath me, and I moan at the first brush of him between my legs.

“I didn’t do this for sex, Bandit,” he whispers, stilling me when I buck against him.

“I know.”

“You’re everything to me.”

Emotion tries to claw its way up my throat, but I swallow it down. “You’re everything to me too.”

He kisses me again, and his tongue meets mine with a soft stroke. I lean up on my knees, forcing his head back to keep our mouths fused. It’s only in this position that I’m above him, and I think he likes it. The groan that rattles his chest intensifies the throb in my centre.

With a slow drag of his fingers, he guides my shirt up my body. I lift my arms while he pulls it over my head, and then it’s gone, tossed out of sight. The clasps of my bra are plucked, and the straps droop down my arms before he tugs them both off.

My breasts hang free, nipples already hard but stiffening further as he lowers his eyes, staring at them. With me leaning above him, all it takes is a dip of his chin to drag his lips across one and suck it into his mouth.

I close my eyes, sighing at the swell of arousal in my belly. Jamie lashes my nipple with his tongue while I palm the back of his head, keeping him in place.

When my nipple grows too sensitive, I guide him to the other, encouraging him to give it the same love and attention. He doesn’t leave me wanting. His enthusiasm is electric, confidence building. It makes me feel sexy and desired in the way I’d always dreamed of .

“I need you,” I whisper, pulling lightly on his hair.

He releases my nipple and looks up at me, nodding while his hands find the backs of my thighs. I reach behind his neck and fist his shirt before pulling it up and over his head.

Chest bare and heaving, he doesn’t move, waiting for my next move. I rest my hands on his abdomen and splay my fingers out over his muscles, taking in the hot, firm feel of them.

When he hisses, they flex, quaking beneath my touch. I push them up his body and move them outward, holding the wide expanse of his thick shoulders.

“You’re beautiful, Jamie,” I murmur.

The corner of his mouth tips up before he pulls on my thighs, forcing me to sit flat on my ass again. I keep my tongue caged beneath my teeth when he leans forward and reaches past me. He moves the orange Bateman jersey between us and then guides it over my head.

My heart flutters like it’s grown wings. I slip my arms through the sleeves, and he tugs the thin material down my body. His pupils flare, eating the vibrant blue while he takes a long look at me and pulls my hair out from where it’s become trapped beneath the jersey.

“How does it look?” I ask.

“Like it was made for you.”

It feels that way too.

Quicker than I’m expecting, he has me on my back and my pants off. I roll my lip between my teeth and watch when he rolls off the bed and works his jeans and briefs down his legs.

He doesn’t waste time. The moment he’s naked, I’m yanked beneath him, the heat from his body forming a cocoon around us.

“How do you want it, wife?” he asks, starting to kiss down my stomach.

I spread my legs wide, trying to encourage him to skip the teasing. Like always, it doesn’t work. Jamie is a firm believer in foreplay, and while I love his desire to make sure I’m always ready for him, I’m also horny after a single look from him. The prep isn’t necessary. I’m already dripping between my legs, probably leaving a wet spot on the duvet.

“Surprise me,” I tell him, wiggling beneath his weight.

He drags his tongue from my belly button to my pubic bone, humming deeply. His teeth scrape my skin. “There’s one position I’ve been wanting to try.”

“Do it, then.”

“You don’t want to know what it is first?”

My eyes cross when he glides his tongue further between my legs until finally, it swipes at my clit. I snap my legs shut, thighs pressing into his cheeks as he reaches a hand around to spear me with two fingers. My clit is sucked hard at the same time he curves his fingers, and I slap a hand to the mattress, moaning.

“Answer me, Blakely,” he coos.

I squeeze my thighs tighter in punishment. “I don’t care what it is as long as you give me your cock.”

Lips glossy with my arousal, he pries my legs away and pulls back. His tongue sweeps over his mouth as a smirk appears.

“Hold on to me and try not to scream. Nate’s awake downstairs,” he warns coyly.

I simply nod, trusting him not to do anything I won’t like.

With a tug, he has me sliding down the bed and bundled in his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist and cling onto him as he lifts me in his arms and carries me across the room.

His hair is long, curling at his neck as I drag my nails up and down his scalp, leaning in close to inhale his scent. When I bring my mouth to his skin and press wet, open-mouthed kisses along his skin, goosebumps rise beneath my lips.

My back hits the wall as he lines us up, the broad head of his cock slowly breaching me. I’m so slick he glides in with a thick stretch but no resistance. The pleasure is instant, stealing my breath as he continues to work himself deep.

“Every time I feel you around me, it gets better,” he admits breathlessly .

I nod quickly, gasping for air as my nails prick at his shoulders.

Once he bottoms out, he stills, his fingers digging into my thighs. “Such a snug little pussy, wife.”

“Yours,” I say on a tight exhale.

“My snug little pussy? That’s what this is?” He glides out, leaving just the tip inside before thrusting forward, working it inside again. “That makes this your cock, then, right?”

My eyes roll backward when he hits my G-spot, sending sparks racing up my spine. Grinding forward still buried deep, he applies pressure to my clit with his groin, ramping up the pleasure.

“Yes,” I moan, wiggling my hips in search of more. “Yes, my cock. My husband. My . . .”

His thrusts become harder, pointed. Every grind against my clit intensifies the pressure blooming in my core. His cock glides against that hidden spot inside of me with every jerk of his hips, threatening to steal my vision.

“Your what, Blakely?”

I shake my head and bite down on my lip to stifle the noise trying to escape me. If he keeps pushing, I’ll tell him how deep my feelings really run, and with what’s coming, I won’t do that to him.

Won’t do that to me.

His expression shifts, anger lighting his dark eyes. Every thrust comes quicker than the last, but I refuse to speak. He parts his lips on a deep groan, but it’s reluctant, like his pleasure forced it free.

“Your. What?”

While his fingers dig harder into my ass, they don’t hurt. He keeps his anger and frustration in check, only allowing his emotions to slip through his staccato words and searing stare.

I’m seconds away from an orgasm. The constant pressure against my clit and strong jab against my G-spot are taking me too high. A balloon expands in my groin, and it’s fear I feel now .

“Jamie—” I cry, shaking my head, pawing at his chest. “I’m going to?—”

He holds me tighter against the wall, bending his head to nip at my mouth in punishment. I suck in a breath and watch when he pulls back as his eyes gain a feral, possessive gleam.

“Soak me, Blakely. I’m proud to be yours.”

Tears burn my eyes as I come. The balloon pops, and I’m helpless to the spray of liquid that soaks into his groin, creating a slippery mess between us. Jamie somehow thrusts harder, faster, and grunts while grinding against me.

“I love you,” he hisses while filling me with hot cum.

“I love . . .” Bliss loosens my tongue, but I’m quick to correct myself with a soft moan.

I’m grateful that Jamie’s too blissed-out to catch my mistake, if anything I said at all. With a soft kiss to my brow, he carries me through to the ensuite and starts the shower. I wiggle in his hold, but he only tightens it, not saying a word.

The room gets hot with steam, and I keep my arms around him, waiting for the moment he can’t hold me any longer. That moment never comes.

Not as he moves us under the water and soaks us completely or when he gingerly rests my back against the wall and slips out of me before washing between my legs. The scent of my body wash fills the shower when he uses the bottle on the shelf to scrub the both of us.

Suddenly, my tears mix with the stream of water down my face. He doesn’t look away from me, and I don’t bother hiding the ache in my chest. There would be no point.

Jamie’s always been the one who can read me no matter how many walls I try and reinforce between us. Every emotion bubbling inside of me is his to see.

The most surprising part of all, though, is that not once does he ask for me to tell him what they all mean.