Page 21 of The Wolf Prince’s Mate (Marked Beneath the Moon #2)

twenty-one

NOVA

When I finally woke up, the empty chair in front of my bed was the first thing I noticed.

I blinked at it, disoriented.

It had never been empty before.

“He’s gone?” I croaked.

“Yeah,” Sydney said softly, crossing the room to sit down on the edge of my bed. She smoothed a hand over the top of my hair, and I squeezed my eyes shut again.

They stung a little.

I was blaming it on my recovery.

“If it’s any comfort, he looked like he would’ve rather torn his own arm off than leave,” Olive offered, and I looked at her.

I’d seen her the last few times I woke up, but that didn’t make me feel any less relieved when I took in her healed, changed body.

She was healthy, now.

Strong.

Alive.

Thank fuck Clay reached out to her for me when he did, or our story could’ve gone very differently.

“I still can’t believe your tits are bigger than mine,” I mumbled.

She snorted. “Don’t want to talk about your fiancé?”

“I don’t think he’s my anything anymore. I don’t even think he’s planning on coming back from Stray.”

“He won’t let someone else take over his job as Beta. Will he?” Syd asked.

“I think his brothers would kill anyone who tried,” I said.

“Only a moron would go up against those massive fuckers,” Olive remarked.

She wasn’t wrong.

I let out a slow breath and started to sit up. My arm bumped something, and I opened my eyes again.

“Hunter brought that for Clay,” Sydney said. “Apparently it’s from the archive. Whatever that is. He said it’s the old pack’s information about mating, and could prove that Clay’s wolf couldn’t hurt you if you sealed a bond. Clay said he wouldn’t risk your life based on a book.”

“Of course he did.” I lowered my head back to the hard hospital bed. “So noble.” The bitterness in my voice couldn’t have been missed.

“What are you going to do?” Olive asked me. She sounded curious.

“I don’t know. My wolf is whining about the thought of him leaving us, and as pissed as I am, I get it. He’s terrified he’ll hurt me, and his fear isn’t unfounded. If it was, he’d still be here.”

“Here.” Olive tucked an arm around my waist and eased me up to a sitting position. I thanked her, slouching against her and the wall.

Syd slipped onto the bed too, taking my other side so she could help keep me upright.

“I wish I could hate him,” I whispered.

“You love him too much for that,” Syd said simply.

“I know.”

My chest hurt.

The rest of me did too.

“Want to see my house?” I asked Olive. “I have a pink couch. It’s glorious.”

She smiled. “Sure.”

“Do you have a place to live yet?” I checked.

“Aspen offered me a room here, but I told her we’d figure that out after you recovered.”

I nodded. “I’ve got two houses. And two Jeeps, actually. Want one of each?”

Syd laughed.

Olive made a noise of confusion.

“Hunter gave them to me as apology presents after that whole mess,” I explained. “Clay was pissed. He gave me the orange Jeep, and the house I actually live in, because he didn’t want me living in his brother’s apology presents.”

“Well, I have no qualms about living in or driving apology presents.” Olive’s voice was upbeat. “Especially considering I’m dirt poor, and in an assload of medical debt.”

“Fuck cancer,” I grumbled.

“Fuck cancer.” She raised an invisible cup, and I pretended to click mine against it.

Syd reached over and did the same, mirroring our sentiments.

“Let’s get out of here,” I said.

They helped me out of the bed, and when I reached for the book, Syd tucked it under her free arm for me. I was too weak to walk on my own, so they supported much of my weight on our way to the elevator. Then, out to the parking lot and into my Jeep.

Oli and I squished in the passenger seat while Syd drove to my place, taking a small detour to show Olive her new cabin. She was emotional when she got back in the vehicle, and hugged me tightly.

There was still shit between us. A lot of it. None of which we had acknowledged or worked through.

But honestly, I didn’t know if we would need to work through all of it anymore.

It had been so long, and we had changed and grown up so much. We were just kids when all of that stuff got between us.

Eventually, a conversation or ten was going to have to happen.

But for the moment, I hoped we could keep pretending we were just normal sisters who hadn’t been enemies as children. It was nice not to hate each other. Really nice.

After we got back, Syd and Olive made pasta and did my dishes for me while I napped on the couch. I felt much better after we ate, and we headed out for a run together in our wolf forms.

Mine was the smallest. And the slowest. And the weakest. But the ladies didn’t care, and their wolves didn’t pick on mine. If anything, they just snuggled her more and loved on her more. Even though it scared her.

That was how everyone I’d ever run with treated me, though. It had surprised me at first, but my wolf was always loved.

I wanted to reach out to Clay, but I didn’t.

I needed more time to work through what I was going to do about him.

Sydney drove us into town, and we spent the rest of the afternoon furniture shopping for Oli’s new place. We used the credit Hunter had given me that Clay hadn’t let me touch, and ended up ordering mostly things that wouldn’t get there for a couple of days.

That meant she would be crashing with me, but I didn’t mind.

I’d gotten used to sleeping with Clay, so it would’ve felt lonely to stay in my house on my own anyway.

It was late when we got back to my place after dropping Sydney off at the Lodge.

Both of us were exhausted, and the quiet had set in on the way home.

I showed Olive to the spare room, though we both knew she had already seen it, and wished her goodnight. She caught my hand when I started to leave, and carefully turned me back around.

When she hugged me suddenly, it caught me by surprise.

Her grip was fierce, and I felt her tears wet my shoulder a moment later.

“Thank you so much, Nova.”

“We’re sisters, Oli. You don’t need to thank me.” I finally hugged her back.

“I treated you like shit when we were kids. I don’t deserve this, but it means everything to me. I thought I was getting what was coming for me when I learned about the cancer and realized I was going to die alone. You saved my life. You saved me . And I don’t deserve it, but?—”

“We were kids. Dad is the one who pinned us against each other,” I said gently. “Don’t blame yourself for that.” I squeezed her before letting go and stepping back.

She wiped the tears beneath her eyes. “I know. I’m sorry. I wish we had been a team, instead of enemies.”

“Now we can be.” I managed a small smile. “Get some sleep. You must be tired from lugging my ass around to all of those stores.”

She smiled, and it reached her eyes in a way that made me feel like a million bucks. “Good thing it’s such a tiny ass.”

I cackled, swatting a hand at her with a grin before I strode down the hallway.

“You really are Galinda, bitch,” I called back over my shoulder.

Her laughter followed me into my room. When I heard her door shut a minute later, I leaned against the wood of my door and closed my eyes.

At least one thing in my life had been figured out.

Sprawled out on my mattress in nothing but one of Clay’s t-shirts, I stared up at the ceiling.

Sleep wasn’t coming.

My room smelled too much like Clay. We’d screwed in that bed a dozen times in the past few weeks, and I could remember it well.

Even when I was unconscious, he had been there.

Sleeping without him was going to be difficult, to say the least.

I picked up my phone off the nightstand and stared at the blank screen. I’d plugged it in when I got back from the Lodge’s hospital, but I hadn’t bothered turning it on.

I was afraid Clay had texted me.

I was more afraid that he hadn’t.

With a long breath, I finally held the power button.

I watched the screen light up, and waited a long moment for a message to come through.

Finally, it buzzed three times. The first message was from that morning. The second was sometime in the afternoon. The third was recent.

I opened the conversation and stared at the earliest one.

Clay

I’m sorry

I stared at the two words.

He was sorry .

Ugh.

The message beneath it was better, though.

Clay

I already miss you

That made my chest ache.

Clay

If you ever want to talk about anything, I’m always here

That message just made me want to punch him.

Because he wasn’t here. He was gone. He had left me, by choice, because he was afraid.

I stared at the message for another minute before shaking my head and clicking away from the conversation.

My phone buzzed again.

Clay

You read my messages but didn’t respond. Why?

Seriously?

I had turned that setting off forever ago.

Why did the option to let someone know when you read their texts even exist? What sane person wanted people to know when they were ignoring messages?

I debated ignoring that text too, but ultimately, I cared about Clay a lot. I didn’t want to hurt him any more than he already had to be hurting, even if he kind of deserved it for ditching me.

Me

The only thing I want to talk about is you making an executive decision to end what we had

And considering the way you left without a conversation, it seems clear you’re not willing to discuss it

Bubbles popped up as he typed an answer, but it didn’t come through.

One minute passed.

Then another.

The bubbles disappeared, and I scowled at the screen.

Right before I turned my phone off, it rang with a video call.

I didn’t want to answer it. I was pissed enough and hurt enough that I wanted to ignore it and turn my phone back off. That would stick it to him for being a dick about the way he left.

But honestly?

I missed him too.

So I answered.

Clay’s expression was tense when he realized he couldn’t see me in the camera. The room was too dark. He must’ve had a light on, because I could clearly see his overgrown stubble and the dark circles beneath his eyes.

My stomach tensed.

“You look like shit, Savage.”

“Can you turn a light on, Gorgeous? I need to see you.”

I let out a harsh breath, but reached over and hit the switch on my lamp. It lit up the room with soft, warm light, and actually did my appearance some favors.

Clay finally relaxed a little. “You’re okay?”

“I’m fine, like always.”

“Is anyone with you?”

“Yes, I picked up a new fiancé at a bar a couple hours ago. We made sweet, sweet love, and as I talk to you, his mouth is currently on my?—”

Clay’s wolf roared through the man.

Fur broke out on his face, and my eyebrows jumped upward. “Cool it. I was joking. I spent all day with my sister and Sydney. The only guy I want is you.”

The fur didn’t disappear immediately.

Clay shuddered and shook for a minute.

I started humming one of the songs Olive and I had been referencing, and his fur started to shift back into skin.

When his fur was finally gone, Clay slumped back against the couch. “He’s never been this bad before.”

“He misses me.”

“He’s not the only one. I had to pull over and take a nap on the way here, and had the most realistic sex dream of my life.”

“Featuring me?”

“Gorgeous, no one else I’ve ever been with holds a candle to you. Of course it featured you. And yes, I jerked off in my car to the fantasy, like a fucking pervert.”

Clay shoved a hand through his hair. It was longer than usual, and far less tame. I guess I’d been out for a while after turning Olive.

“You can lose the pervert title if you tell me about it.”

His eyes darkened. “Do you have your vibrator?”

“Of course I do.”

He growled. “I want to be the one to use it on you.”

“Kinda hard to do that with the way you ditched me. I shouldn’t even be talking to you right now,” I said, as I reached into my nightstand and pulled out the vibrator.

“You shouldn’t,” he agreed, but his gaze was hungry. “Do you have it? I want to see.”

“No. If you want to see the goods, you have to be next to me.”

He clenched his jaw, watching my face and shoulders intently as I parted my legs and put the vibrator where I wanted it.

“Alright. What did you picture? I want you to jerk off with me.” The man clearly needed it.

I heard the rustle of fabric, and then Clay’s eyes closed.

I knew that face. He must’ve wrapped his hand around his cock.

“Are you hard for me yet, Savage?”

“Rock hard. Just thinking about you being naked makes me want to come.”

“Good. Tell me the fantasy.”

Clay’s gaze remained fixed on me. “We were at your house. In your bed. You were letting me play with your vibrator, and I was teasing you. I used it on your tits. Your neck. Your thighs. When I used it on your asshole, you came for me.”

I shivered, starting it up.

His jaw clenched, and I could tell he was stroking himself.

“When I went back to teasing you with it, you told me you wanted me inside you while I used it on your ass. I took you slowly. Inch by inch. You came twice before I was even fully seated. When I started fucking you, you came so hard you screamed.”

I moaned.

Clay’s eyes grew wilder, his breathing rougher. “Tell me you’d never let me take you like that, Gorgeous.”

“You know I’m not going to tell you that. You tease my asshole every time we fuck lately. I’ve known you’re interested in it for ages. And I love everything you do to me.”

“Fuck!” Clay roared the curse, and his face contorted with his release.

I dropped the phone and stifled my cries with my hand, hips jerking and body throbbing with my climax.

The pleasure was nice, but nowhere near as intense as it was with Clay.

He snarled at me while I came, and I knew it was because I’d moved the phone. He couldn’t see my face, but I had to quiet myself.

“That climax was mine to see, Nova,” Clay growled at me, on his feet now and pacing in his cabin. His hair was messier, his bloodshot eyes redder.

“Olive is in the other room. I had to put the phone down so I could stay quiet,” I panted. “If you want to see me, you should be here.”

“If there was any way I could, I would be.”

“It’s late, Clay. I’m going to bed. You should too.”

“No, Nova, I?—”

“Goodnight.”

“Please.” The word was a desperate plea.

One I didn’t have the heart to refuse.

When I sighed and met his eyes, I found them watering.

Shock made my throat swell instantly.

“If there was anything I could do to change what I am, I would do it. I’d give anything. Pay anything. Do anything. Anything .” His words were so desperate, I believed him. “But I can’t. It’s killing me, but I can’t. I can’t risk your life. I’m in love with you, okay? I need you like I need air, and I can’t let myself have you. You would always be in danger because of me.”

“I’m always in danger because of me , Clay. Because of what I am.”

“It’s not the same. Being in danger because of what you are is a world different than risking your life because an insane wolf is in love with you.”

“What happened to make your wolf the way he is?” I asked, sensing that he was about to pull away no matter what I said or did.

He paled further. “I can’t tell you. It’s…” he closed his eyes. “I can’t.”

“Can I ask your brothers?”

“You can try.”

I nodded.

Clay closed his eyes again. “My wolf needs to run. I have to go, but I love you, okay? I’ll call tomorrow.”

“Alright. We’ll talk tomorrow. Goodnight, Savage.”

“Night, Gorgeous.”

He managed a small smile before he hung up the phone. When the call ended, I stared at the screen for a solid two minutes.

Clay was a mess. I’d never seen him like that before. He was… lost.

Afraid.

And hurting.

The only person who could change that was me.

But he wasn’t going to let me unless I had a solid argument that he couldn’t contest.

Thankfully, there was a book in my kitchen that could help me get there.

My lips curved slightly.

I was going to find proof that Clay couldn’t hurt me—and then I was going to make him mine.