Page 42 of The Summer You Were Mine

It wasn’t the first time someone had forgotten that he’d lost his father, midsentence.

It may have been the first time he didn’t try to hide from it.

Instead of doing some kind of evasive shuffle-step for the benefit of the other person’s shame, he just let it ride.

Truth was, he didn’t feel hurt, especially given the person who said it.

“You know I am not going to pull that guilt trip thing on you. It’s not fair, I know.”

“But you really could,” she said, her face glowing from purple to blue and back again in the lights ringing the pod.

“Yes, I could. But I won’t. Let your mom and dad do their thing, okay? You know they are both good people. They’re just not good together right now. Are you looking at that moon?” Cris ducked his head and pointed up at the silver disk in the sky. They were up so high, it seemed to be at eye level.

“Good people, yes. Logical? Not even a tiny bit,” she said without turning around. “I did see the moon.”

“Well, if you knew that your relationship issues were going to break someone else’s heart, I’m pretty sure you’d feel kind of terrible, no?”

“Hell yes. I can’t be responsible for any third parties. My relationship track record would depress an undertaker.”

“So don’t put that kind of pressure on them. It really doesn’t have anything to do with you.”

“But it does. Ben and I— My dad didn’t make life easy for us.”

“Sorry to say this, Ellie, but that’s between you and your dad.

In my opinion, even if your parents weren’t getting a divorce, you’d still have to fix it with him if it means something to you,” he said as the pod paused, likely letting other passengers on.

Ellie turned her face to the window again and gazed down at the ant-like crowds below.

“You might have a point.”

“Our dads were not the nine-to-five kind of dads.”

“True.”

“They were kind of fun, though, weren’t they?”

“True,” she said again, this time laughing.

“Are you thinking what I am thinking?” He laughed, too, remembering.

“The time they played each other in tennis with a swim fin on one foot each?” Ellie clutched her stomach.

“With the water polo caps on!”

“And they used one set of fins so—”

“Your dad had on the left fin and my dad had the right!” Cris flapped his foot at the ankle.

“And they were trying to run—” she said, now breathless.

“But all you saw was wobble-slap, wobble-slap, wobble-slap!”

Cris was shaking with laughter. Ellie was doubled over.

He thought the pod would be swinging wildly back and forth, but it remained still and smooth, carrying them up into the night.

The ripples of laughter subsided and they sat closer on the bench seat.

Cris let his hand slide over so that the side of his hand rested against the warmth of her thigh.

The first few notes of a familiar song flowed around them—hadn’t they just talked about this song?

He hadn’t heard it in ages—ten years, maybe more.

He turned to see Ellie, mouthing the lyrics like she had done so many years ago while watching that band play.

I want to see you smiling,

I want to know you’re fine,

And I know I will never let you go by yourself.

“You do remember.”

“I remember some parts of that night.” She smiled.

“I know you can only remember the parts that you saw. But there was a lot you didn’t see.

” Cris reached his arm around Ellie’s shoulder and pulled her in close.

Her hand rested on his chest a moment, then smoothed down around to his back as she pulled herself even closer.

Their eyes locked as he drew his hand to her face, gently tipping her chin up to him.

“I was mad about you then, Ellie. You scrambled my little-kid brain in the most awesome and terrible way. I never thought that I would ever get to do this again, and every time I touch you it reminds me of how lucky I am.”

“I don’t know what this is, Cris.”

“I don’t think we have to know, El. Just be with me. Here. Now. Just be with me.”

She nodded, her eyes blazing, lips parted.

He kissed her, first softly, then deeper, but eventually letting her lead the way.

He went where she took him, beyond the past and the future, to a place where nothing mattered but his mouth on hers.

She finally pulled away, breathless, and he pressed his forehead to hers.

“I am afraid of how I feel with you,” she said. “When it’s only us, like this, I can’t remember why I am positive this is a bad idea.”

“Did it occur to you that there’s nothing bad about it?”

“Not on any occasion where rational thought is involved.”

“Maybe it’s because this isn’t just some idea, Ellie.

After thirty years of history, it’s kind of hard to think that we are some kind of revolutionary new concept in relationships.

Even though we didn’t speak for years, we might be the most consistent thing in each other’s lives.

So… what if the only thing we’ve messed up is not being together? ”

Ellie looked at Cris with a serious face, then broke into a grin. He smiled back.

“How long have you been rehearsing that?” She squinted at him.

“It depends. Do you mean out loud in the bathroom mirror or only in my head?”

“The second one.”

“Maybe since the other day in the vineyard. Or since we were fourteen. I’m not sure.

” He smiled, shaking his head. “All I am saying is that maybe we need to take a chance here. Maybe you and I have both been hurt because we tried to play it too safe. We never risked it. What happens if the opposite is what we need?”

“You’re not helping me to not think,” she said, the creases in her forehead threatening to return.

“You’re right. Maybe this will do it,” he said, and this time didn’t wait for her to say a word.

Cris leaned forward, reached both hands to Ellie’s face, and felt the blood rush in his ears as he pressed his mouth to hers.

And in what might have been the greatest triumph of the last decade, she kissed him back.

He couldn’t hear the music, couldn’t see the lights, couldn’t remember where he was.

Every sense was directed to the space between their lips and how he could keep it from widening.

She moaned slightly and cupped his cheek as the kiss deepened.

“It’s working,” she pulled her mouth away and whispered. “Don’t stop.”

He was dizzy, realizing that every bit of blood in his body went straight to his groin at the same time the pod was descending.

He ran his hand down over her shoulders and nudged her head aside with gentle kisses along her jawline.

Ellie gasped as Cris teased his lips along her collarbone.

He flicked his tongue against her neck, drawing another sigh, and returned to kiss her lips.

He wanted her taste, her breath, her mouth, her everything.

He wanted Ellie.