Page 52 of The Second Chance Supper Club

Cath sat nursing a cuppa. It was slightly chilly there in the potting shed, so she was huddled with a fleecy rug wrapped around her.

She’d just finished clearing the last things from yesterday’s pudding night, and though that had been lovely and was a big success for Lily, she couldn’t help but feel tired, and a touch lonely.

This was the place, after all, that only a few weeks ago, she and Will had talked, watched the stars, and held hands.

She had this sinking feeling that life was going amiss again.

That she was somehow sliding away down the wrong path.

Sitting there, thinking about her and Will, the past and the future, Cath decided she was going to have to grab the proverbial bull by the horns.

She held her mobile in her palm, intending to message, but then stalled over the best wording.

She had a couple of false starts, deleted them, and then, before she had chance to change her mind, fired over a text:

Will, I know this is difficult, but would you mind calling by my cottage for a chat? Or I can come to you. I think I need to explain why I did what I did, back then. I feel I owe you that much.

She also owed it to herself, she realised.

What she had done back then had been a regret of hers, for so many years now.

And, as well as explaining that to Will, perhaps giving them both a second chance, she felt she very much owed it to their wonderful Supper Club group to try and put things right between them …

or as right as she could. She’d work at building a bridge for the two of them; it might never now lead to romance, but it might make living in this same small village that little bit easier over time.

She took a slow breath. She could only try. And, after that, it was over to Will to see if he could forgive, if not yet forget.

Cath had an anxious wait for a reply, trying her best to get on with everyday life in the meanwhile. And finally, twelve hours later, there it came. A sinking feeling lodging in Cath’s gut as she began to read his response:

I don’t think that’s a good idea, Cath. Best just to leave things be, okay. It was a very long time ago, after all.

The hurt was there in the tone of his text.

Cath sighed, thinking that the damage must have been done all those years ago.

She knew he’d gone through so much else recently, too.

He must still be hurting from the trauma of losing his wife …

the woman who’d rebuilt his trust. No point adding to his turmoil, stirring up the past once more.

Well, there was her answer and she had to abide by his decision.

The past was staying firmly in the past, and only she and Susie would ever know the truth about it.

Even though it would be hard, she’d cover up the coolness between her and Will from the others somehow, and come up with some white lie to tell Nikki.

But beyond that, oh, who knew how it would affect her life in the village from now on?

She felt like she was missing Will already. Her heart felt leaden.

But it was what it was. The impasse was evidently to continue.

She was walking the next day, getting a blast of fresh air and a nature hit to try and bolster her mood, when she saw him passing by in his car.

She felt winded as she gave a polite half-wave.

He nodded, an acknowledgement but no smile.

And her world felt all wobbly … but she’d just have to learn to live with that, wouldn’t she?

Instead of wallowing in self-pity, which was never a good thing, Cath decided to go and do some good with a visit to Maria. A short drive through the leafy hawthorn-hedged country lanes with sunny rays blasting through the windscreen, brought her to Kirkton and the care home.

She was told Maria was out in the garden, making the most of the sunny day, and found her with a wide-brimmed hat on and a cup of tea, sat in the shade of an old oak tree.

The birds were singing all around, and a sparrow was hopping near the elderly lady’s feet, no doubt on the lookout for biscuit crumbs.

‘Hello, Maria.’

‘Oh, hello. It’s Andreas’s friend, isn’t it … Cath, yes. Isn’t it beautiful out here. I get fed up being cooped up inside all the time.’

‘Yes, it’s a gorgeous garden,’ Cath agreed. The hydrangeas were in full bloom, bold bushes with deep-purple and red bursts of ball-shaped blossom. ‘Are you warm enough? Can I fetch you anything?’ She’d noticed a slight breeze.

‘Oh, I’m fine, thank you. It’s quite balmy today.’ The old lady was wearing a navy cardigan over a polyester blue-floral dress and thick tights. ‘How kind of you to visit again.’

‘I really enjoyed it last time. It’s no bother at all.’

‘Well, pull up a seat. And if you ask Linda, that’s the one in the green top, just over there, I’m sure one of the ladies will fetch you a cup of tea. I quite fancy a top-up, too.’

Cath was soon settled on a white plastic garden chair beside the elderly lady, with a cup of tea to hand. ‘And how are you doing?’

‘Pretty good. I get the cast off next week, thank heavens. So, no more being treated like a baby.’ She puffed out a sigh. ‘Anyway, how are you, young lady?’

‘I’m good thanks.’ Cath appreciated that she was very lucky with her health and her new home – all the other Will stuff could be put aside for now. ‘Oh, and can you tell me more about the wedding?’ she added. ‘Andreas said the family had sent some photos to you.’

‘Oh yes, I had some marvellous prints in the post, and they sent a piece of wedding cake all boxed up. Delicious it was, proper iced fruit cake, plenty of brandy in it too.’

‘Ah, lovely.’

‘It was a big fancy do in some posh hotel, by the looks of it. Andreas said how wonderful all the food was. Shame I missed all that.’ Maria gave a small tut, but then smiled.

‘And Eleni, her dark hair all piled up like a princess … and oh, her dress looked so magical. Many, many layers of tulle in a beautiful ivory, with a fitted bodice that sparkled with little jewels. Reminded me of photos we had of her when she was little and off to ballet class, such a pretty girl.’

Cath smiled too, picturing the little girl now all grown up and at her own fairytale wedding.

Maria was on a roll, evidently proud of her family. ‘Oh, and five bridesmaids, she had. All looking lovely, in shades of lilac.’

‘It all sounds wonderful.’ Maria’s gold wedding band then glinted in the sun, catching Cath’s eye. ‘How long were you married, Maria? What was your husband like? Was he anything like Andreas to look at?’

‘Well then, it would have been …’ Maria paused to think ‘1966 when we were married … so yes, fifty-eight years ago.’ Her mind was still sharp.

‘But sadly, Theo passed, ten years back.’ She paused, taking a sip of tea, her left hand slightly wobbly.

‘And no, he wasn’t particularly like Andreas.

He was tall, yes, but very lean, with sparkling blue eyes.

Quite unusual for a Greek-Cypriot. I always thought he had a touch of Prince Philip about him.

’ She smiled, remembering. ‘I think Andreas looks more like my side of the family – has the thicker set of our men, and darker eyes.’

‘Yes, I can see he looks like you.’

‘My Theo was a kind man, he always had time for others … and he was hardworking. He worked in a shipping office. Taught himself accounts and everything once we got here to London, wanted to make his way in the world.’ Her dark eyes lit up with the memories.

‘And we used to laugh a lot. About all kinds of things. We’d go dancing too, if we could find someone to take care of the children.

Mind you, he could drive me mad at times …

stubborn as an ox. But we rubbed together well.

Lasted a lot of storms. It was a good marriage.

’ Cath nodded. It must be lovely to get to that age, and know you’d had that solid base behind you, though you then had the pain of losing your rock.

‘And what about you, Cath? You have a son, yes?’ Cath had mentioned Adam at the last visit.

‘Yes, Adam. He’s twenty-two now. All grown up.

And well, the reason I’m living up here now is for a fresh start …

I think Andreas mentioned to you that my husband had left me.

’ The fuckwit - of-a-husband phrase still played in her head.

Cath had pulled it out several times since her last visit, to make herself smile, and remind herself she really was better off without him.

‘We’d been married for thirty years. Breaking up was difficult … messy.’

‘Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. How are you finding everything?’

‘Pretty good now. I love the village, and Northumberland. The coast and the countryside are so beautiful here. And I’ve been made very welcome, especially by your Andreas and Dan, so I’ve a lot to be thankful for …’

‘That’s an awful lot of change to cope with on your own. I’ve seen friends and family go through similar over the years. It was never an easy time for them.’

Maria had a thoughtful way with her words, and a lovely calming voice.

More than eighty years of experience were on her side.

Cath still felt troubled by the recent developments in the village, and the way things felt so unresolved with Will, Matty.

She’d even dreamt about him last night; oh, and he’d looked so young in her dream.

She was transported back to when he was really just a boy, and she a young girl, all that time ago.

When the world had felt exciting and full of opportunities, and when their young love seemed to be the start of something.

‘Maria, you’ve seen a lot of life, can I ask you about something?’

‘Yes, of course. Go ahead, my child. There’s nothing much can take me by surprise, not anymore.’

‘It’s just that I need a bit of advice. In confidence.’

‘Of course. And well, if I did tell anyone around here …’ she nodded at her fellow guests, glimpsed through the day room window, with a wry smile ‘… they’ll have forgotten in five minutes. Not that I would tell, of course. Your secrets are safe with me. Fire away.’

Cath felt instinctively that Maria was someone she could trust. ‘All right, so there’s someone I’ve met recently …

someone from my past.’ Cath took a slow breath.

‘When we were young, we had a brief relationship.

It was lovely … a holiday romance, I was only sixteen, and well, the truth of it is … I feared I was pregnant.

‘A few weeks later, I learned it was a false alarm. I’d totally panicked at the time, I really had meant to keep in touch with him, but didn’t.

’ She paused to take a sip of tea, her throat dry with emotion.

‘We lived a long way away from each other, so I couldn’t see him to explain.

I’d sent one note at the beginning saying what a lovely week it had been, but then with all the worry, I didn’t answer any of his other letters … ’

Maria was listening calmly. ‘And how is this troubling you now?’

‘Well, it’s been so strange, but we met by chance when I moved up here, and I didn’t realise it was the same man.

And at first, he didn’t recognise me either, and a lovely friendship was growing between us.

But now he’s worked out who I am, it’s all gone wrong.

He can barely face me.’ Cath watched a honey bee hover over an ornamental daisy.

‘He’s told me how much it hurt him at the time …

me just dropping him like that. And I know he’s had a really bad time lately with his wife dying just two years ago.

I feel like I’m stirring up too many bad memories for him …

but deep down inside, I can’t seem to shake off this feeling that we might still have something special between us, something to look forward to.

’ ‘Hmm, have you talked with him properly, told him the truth?’

‘Not all of it. Not about the pregnancy scare. I did ask to see him this week, but he’s cut me off. Can’t really blame him … it’s exactly what I did.’ Cath sighed. ‘Maria, is it kinder to let things be, or do I listen to my heart and try to speak with him again?’

‘Will you rest until you do?’ She quirked an eyebrow.

‘No.’

‘Well, I think there’s your answer. Life’s far too short not to try.

’ The old lady gave a kind smile, then added sagely, ‘No need to go in like a bull in a china shop, though. Slowly, slowly, if needs be. If he’s been hurt, like any of us, it might take time.

And then, if the answer’s still “no”, at least you can be proud that you were brave enough to ask the question. ’

They seemed like very wise words indeed.

‘Thank you, Maria.’ Cath took another soothing sip of tea, and then changed the focus of the conversation. ‘So, how’s life here in the home?’

‘I’m looked after very well, I have to say, if a little too restricted. I’d love to break out one day, go off up to the high street or something. I used to have little trips out with Andreas sometimes … before this darned falling lark.’

‘Perhaps we could ask to get you a day pass or something? If we’re allowed, I can drive you back to the village, and you could have lunch at my cottage with Andreas and Dan? Would you like that? I’ll check with Andreas, of course, and if the home is agreeable … Well, I can only ask …’

‘Oh, that’d be wonderful. It’d be like The Great Escape .’ ‘Hah, I’ll not be charging over the wall with you on a motorbike.’ Cath laughed. ‘But as long as you can fit in my Mini.’

The pair of them chuckled. The conversation rolled on over another cup of tea served with custard creams. The wind then changed direction, and Cath helped Maria slip a blanket over her knees.

After chatting some more, they then decided to take a slow stroll around the garden together looking at the colourful summer plants – as well as the hydrangeas there were tall blue delphiniums, giant yellow daisies, and peachy-pink scented roses in the border.

Then, as the air began to cool, they headed back into the warmth of the home.

‘It’s card game time, Maria, are you joining us?’ one of the carers called over.

‘Oh yes, I enjoy a game of Rummy.’

‘Well, I’ll take my leave then. It’s been lovely visiting today, Maria.’

‘It’s been wonderful to see you too, child. Take care.’

‘And you. Oh, and thank you so much for listening.’

‘You’re most welcome.’ Maria gave a sage nod. ‘And do come and see me again … and yes, let’s have that lunch trip. The Great Escape it is! There’s only so much Rummy, tea and cottage pie I can take.’ She gave a beautiful cheeky grin, which lit up her lined and lovely face.