Page 36 of The Reluctant Siren (Texas Sirens: Legacy #2)

Jensen stood in the big lobby of the building he was staying in. The Club was part office building, part BDSM club, and part luxury hotel/condos. It was absolutely unlike any place he’d ever been in.

This was Harlow’s world and yet he could still see her laughing and having fun in his rundown childhood home. He could see her sitting by the river with her feet in the water, sipping an iced tea.

This might be her world, the one she grew up in, but she wasn’t some spoiled rotten princess who couldn’t appreciate anything without a designer label. Harlow could be happy in any number of places.

He hoped she could be happy with Niall. He prayed for that.

It had been three days since he’d moved from his hospital room to the gorgeous one bedroom with a balcony and a glorious view of Dallas. It was stunning, but all he could do as he sat out there at night was think about her.

Niall had called and promised she was doing well. Niall told him they were moving between his crappy loft and Harlow’s place while he was getting back into the groove of working. They were planning on going to The Hideout this weekend.

He wished them all the good things in the world.

Maybe one day she would be able to look at him again. Maybe one day they could be friends.

Fuck, he missed her. He missed her and missed Niall and missed the him he might have been if he hadn’t walked out that door. If he’d realized what he wanted before he and Jack had gotten to Dallas.

If…

His brand-spanking-new therapist had told him to write all the if onlys down so they could move on to actual real plans that would work to achieve what Jensen wanted.

But what he wanted was her and he didn’t…

Yep. There it was. That damn intrusive voice that told him he was nothing. He was poor white trash and he wouldn’t come to anything. He was lucky the military had taken him because the only other place people thought he belonged was jail. He let his brother die.

Identify the voice. Listen to it for a moment if you feel the need. And then reply.

Leo Meyer had him set up protocols for dealing with intrusive thoughts. It involved a lot of talking to himself. And meditation. Which he was weirdly good at. And yoga, which he was not good at.

Yet.

You try. You might fail sometimes, but you get up and you keep moving. You might have come from poverty, but money doesn’t make a person who they are. Choices do, and you’re going to make good ones. He went through the mental affirmations until he got to the one that hurt. It made him ache, but Leo told him something he’d immediately recognized as truth. He’d told him healing couldn’t occur until the pain was acknowledged and accepted. So Jensen stood there in the middle of the lush lobby fighting back tears as he forced himself to accept the heartbreak. I loved my brother. I did what I could. I will miss him every single fucking day, but I did not kill him. I was busy ensuring he had a future. I made the right choices when it came to Tommy right up until I decided to devote my life to revenge, and that is over now and my brother would be proud.

Take that, intrusive voice.

“Take this.”

Chase Dawson was suddenly in front of him offering him a water bottle.

“You gotta stay hydrated. I know we’re old dudes, but Taggart is still nasty when it comes to checking a guy.”

He took a long breath and hoped he wasn’t tearing up because he didn’t want to break down in front of Harlow’s dad. He took the bottle.

“Thanks. I should have brought my own, but I was in a hurry. I had a session with Leo.”

“And now you can kick his ass at four on four,”

Chase said with a nod.

“You’re going to be our ringer, Jensen. You and the other one. And before you tell me you don’t know how to play basketball, it doesn’t matter. Your knees don’t creak. Trust me, you got this. Everyone else is old. Body check Taggart a couple of times and he’ll slow down. And, kid, it’s okay to get emotional. If you need to break down on the court, no one will think twice. Just try to do it after we’re up by ten or so. Then go to town.”

Embarrassment flooded him.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to be that obvious.”

Chase stared at him for a moment.

“Yeah, it’s hard at first. When Leo cracks you open and convinces you it’s okay to be vulnerable and shit and that emotion is like the whole meaning of human existence, so it doesn’t make us better men to avoid it. That’s a hard lesson, but it gets easier.”

Maybe he didn’t need embarrassment either.

“Why are you helping me? I’m so grateful, but I don’t understand. Niall and Harlow are together. He’ll take care of her. He’ll love her. He’s the best man I know.”

Chase frowned at him.

“And you’re the bad guy?”

“See, that is a loaded question because my intentions were good, and I even had this last-minute revelation that I was being a self-sacrificing moron for absolutely no reason. So all this new info in my brain tells me I’m actually not the bad guy,”

he replied.

“But I think Harlow sees me that way, so I would expect you do, too.”

He’d wondered that first night if it hadn’t all been a slow play to murder him. He’d still gotten in the car and let Chase drive to The Club and give him his schedule. Work and therapy and working out and back to The Club.

He was supposed to start classes next week to get his certification as a personal trainer, but he kind of wanted to study some business, too. Niall could use someone who could help him run the business part of the gym.

“You are not the bad guy,”

Chase said with a sigh as though this took a part of his soul to say.

“You’re a dumbass, but then we all are. Look, it might have been pointed out to me that you didn’t have a father figure. That you had to be the father figure. Well, lucky for you, I had a great dad. Oh, he was my older brother, but he was solid. Still is. So consider this my official taking you under my wing. I’m a sarcastic asshole but if I care about you, I’ll go to the ends of the earth. Look, this love thing is hard when you didn’t get a lot of it as a kid. It’s also hard if you got a lot of love and never had to worry about anyone leaving. You and Harlow are on opposite ends of hard, but I suspect my daughter is going to come around and be the brave, glorious woman she is eventually. Ah, there’s my proof right now. Don’t fuck this up.”

His jaw nearly dropped as Harlow walked through the revolving door, Niall following her. She was in a dress looking like she brought the damn sun with her. Everything felt more light, more beautiful, with her in the lobby.

She laughed at something Niall said and slid her sunglasses off. Niall was dressed in basketball shorts and a tank, carrying his gym bag. He saw Jensen before Harlow did and put a hand on Harlow’s arm. He leaned over and whispered something in her ear.

She pulled back and shook her head.

She didn’t want to see him.

“I should go. Where are we meeting?”

“You should be patient and trust her,”

Chase said under his breath.

Harlow turned and started walking right up to them. She hugged her dad.

“Hey. You’re still doing this? I would have thought you guys would have moved to like checkers or something.”

Her dad laughed.

“We’re not that old yet. Well, Taggart is.”

“Fuck you,”

the big blond guy said as he walked past them.

“Wiley, if you think I’m going easy on you because you had a couple thousand volts through your system a few days ago, you’re wrong. Old, my ass. I am timeless.”

Chase flashed a grin as Taggart disappeared behind the door leading to the courtyard.

“See, you want to put him on his ass now, right?”

“You are a terrible influence,”

Harlow said with a shake of her head. She turned to him and her light dimmed slightly.

“How are you, Jensen?”

She was so pretty. He wanted to take her hand and tell her everything. But patience was the key.

“I’m okay. The shaking has stopped, and I haven’t tripped over my own feet since yesterday. I’m having sessions with your Uncle Leo, and they’re going well. How about you?”

“Niall is keeping me busy,”

she replied.

“But today I’m here to support my mom and my auntie. They lead a survivor’s group. It’s the one they belonged to years ago, and now they help facilitate. They’re having a tea today to celebrate their volunteers. I’m going to be in serving mode.”

He remembered how nice her serving mode could be, but he tamped that right down since her dad seemed to have a six sense about him.

“That sounds great. Niall? Are you ready for this?”

Niall gave him a big smile and slapped him on the back.

“I’m here so the olds don’t take you out, brother.”

No. Niall was here to support him. Those tears were right there again.

“Thank you.”

Harlow kissed Niall on the cheek and started to walk toward the banquet hall.

“Don’t tear an ACL, please. I know they’re all old, but they’re mean and well trained. Do not underestimate them. Hey, lunch after? My mom is serving tea cakes and shit. I need a burger and a beer.”

He waited for Niall to tell her yes and then realized everyone was looking at him.

“No?”

Harlow asked. A brow rose over her eyes.

“Niall thought you might like a burger. They serve a lot of froufrou food here.”

“Yes.”

He nearly tripped trying to get the word out.

“Yeah, I would love a burger. I would love to have lunch with you. With you and Niall. That would be great.”

Chase snorted.

“So awkward. I’m going to go to the locker room and make fun of my brother.”

Harlow walked back as her dad left.

“It’s only lunch.”

He nodded.

“Only lunch.”

“Do you want it to be more?”

She managed to make the question a challenge.

“I want it to be forever, but baby, I’m willing to work. Your dad is right about a lot of things. Not the sniper stuff. He’s extremely invested in not getting sniped, and the actual statistics don’t hold up, but that’s not the point.”

She was smiling. Like she used to. Like he amused her.

“I think it’s a perfect point, and you should bring it up with Dad on the basketball court because it will totally throw him off.”

“I think I’m on his team. But I’ll hold it for a good time,”

Jensen promised.

“My real point is I’m trying. And it’s for you but it’s for me, too. I think I might like being happy for once. Like this asshole who is obviously euphoric.”

Niall shrugged.

“How could I not be? I got my warrior princess.”

“Then it’s just lunch, but Jensen, you should know that lunch can be a starting point,” she said.

“We take it slow this time,”

Jensen offered.

“I know sometimes you think we’re a flash fire, but I’m going to be good for you. So friends for now?”

She held a hand out.

“Friends for now.”

She sighed.

“It won’t take long if you keep looking at me like that, Jensen. Niall, I love you. Take down my dads for me.”

She turned and walked away, and Jensen and Niall watched her.

“I don’t think we should take down her dads,”

Niall said.

“She’s kidding about that. Her mom would be pissed if one of them ended up in a brace or something.”

Oh, he thought they were about to see a whole bunch of braces.

“She doesn’t hate me.”

Niall turned to him.

“No. She loves you and I love you, and let’s take a deep breath and try to find something normal. I happen to know that you’re going to be invited to play at The Hideout this weekend. Don’t expect sex. Just ease in and get a lay of the land and if she decides she wants a second top…”

“I’ll be there.”

He had a sudden surge of real hope.

She loved him. He loved her. He loved Niall.

All he had to do was love himself, too, and it would all work out.

“Let’s play some basketball,”

Jensen said.

“Although apparently it’s also therapy, so you should be ready for that.”

“I’m ready for anything, brother,”

Niall replied.

Jensen was ready for his future to start.