Page 36 of The Pactbound Angel (The Soul Mirror Duet #1)

A Private Celebration

We didn’t know what to anticipate when we first came to Jeffron’s village, but I was certainly not expecting what we beheld.

Homey cottages, stores, small farms, and even a school surrounded a large blue pond in the center.

The air was damp and humid, though not uncomfortably so.

Lily pads, colorful flowers, reeds, and cattails rimmed the water, which was being carefully tended to by other toads.

Under the gently lapping waves, there were hundreds upon hundreds of tiny tadpoles.

Their birthing pond. I chose to admire it at a distance.

We were welcomed with warmth, especially when Jeffron told the tale of how we saved his life from the frogs. He still appeared heartbroken. Though he lived, I felt like a failure.

We resolved to stay only for the night. When checking the date to see how many days of rations we had left, I realized with a moment’s panic it was time. The toads provided me clean, hot water for bathing, which was another reason why they would feature in my prayers that night.

That evening, Ramiren was surprised to see my silent and sudden appearance at his tent without a whispered pretext, manufactured excuse, or any prearrangement whatsoever, but his ever-present smile widened. "Good evening, Lady Nathalia. Is there something I can do for you? "

"Well, actually, it's what I'd like to do for you.

" Lifting the lit candle I’d been palming, my smile turned to a grin.

With a few notes of a familiar and far-reaching children's tune often sung at birthdays, I ducked into his tent.

At its conclusion, I whispered, "Happy birthday, Ramiren. Make a wish."

"I'd nearly forgotten both the day, and that I'd revealed that information to you." He shook his head in disbelief with a small chuckle. "So many other things have happened. Thank you for remembering it for me."

"The date stuck with me. I did my best to keep track until then. Until now, I suppose." I lifted the candle higher. "After you make a wish, I'll tell you my present."

Ramiren exhaled, fluttering the small flame cupped in my hands but not extinguishing it.

"My wish would be difficult to tell. I won't bore you with the technical wording required as part of a pact, but I can share with you its essence, the intended effect.

In short, when appropriate, I'd like to have the opportunity to choose where I go, for once. Not any specific place, just anywhere at all. That sounds like a small thing, but I’ve never been able to make that call.

Every home I've had, temporary or permanent, I have left due to the decision of another person or group.

That's not as sad as it sounds, but it is something I would change, even at a price. "

My face softened, feeling ashamed as I met Ramiren's eyes. "My present to you was to grant you whatever you wished for. Anything your heart desired, I would have seen it done. Of course, you may decide where you go. You could leave us tomorrow if you wanted.”

Ramiren sighed and shook his head. "I know. Let’s not get maudlin.

I am, now, choosing to stay. I have no desire to leave.

” His face suddenly brightened with a crooked grin.

“I should have chosen something simpler.

I knew I should have just said a pony . A beginner's mistake, always choose the pony. "

I let out a sudden laugh, shaking my head. "I understand. Sometimes circumstances dictate where we go, and nothing we do can change that. "

"I appreciate the sentiment in any case.

It was not just idle curiosity on your part, and something you intended to provide.

I should have understood that. I am honored by your intent, even though I have no desire to depart any time soon.

" He inhaled sharply, turning his attention to the candle in my hands.

My smile nearly cracked my face in two while watching him blow out the flame. The only illumination now came from a lantern in the far corner. A quote from a favorite book came to mind. “‘Fate is no more than a story of mistakes and triumphs, ever mysterious until the last page.’”

Ramiren’s delighted eyes met mine. “You enjoy Quinta Lapro’s work?”

I felt the sun in my chest, and I bit my lip to keep my smile from hurting my face. “You know her work?”

“She is a favorite of mine. ‘Let men be gentle, and their fury saved for their own inadequacies.’”

My heart burst, and I could not form words for a long moment. “I am not naive enough to think all men are like you. In or outside the bedroom. But I can hope the one I choose is half the man you are. I hope you know I mean every word.”

His eyes took on a mischievous glint, his slow grin wide. "Oh, I think you mean everything you say, Nathalia. But you flatter me. I've learned what a combination of even completely sincere flattery and that expression means, but you still have to ask directly."

No longer surprised, or even ashamed, that he knew I was aroused, since I nearly always was around him. When walking behind him on a march. When watching him talk. When fighting deftly with his rapier. When watching him read. Laugh. Smile. Breathe. Exist.

Lifting a hand to his jaw, my fingers traced his trimmed beard with my thumb. "I didn't want to impose on your birthday."

"No imposition at all. It isn't labor or an inconvenience for me, and I enjoy each lesson as well. Do you wish to begin? "

“Actually, no.”

Ramiren looked surprised, and he straightened.

I stuttered to clarify, “I mean, yes, but I don’t want to do a lesson right now.”

He showed mercy by inclining his head. “Then what would you have of me, Lady Nathalia?”

Just be honest. He could say no… but he could also say yes.

"I want to spend time with you. That’s all. If it happens, it happens, but that is not my aim here. It’s your birthday, Ramiren. You decide. I am at your service."

“Oh.” He tilted his head. “I see.”

I fidgeted with the spent candle in my hands. “Is that alright?”

Ramiren furrowed his eyebrows, as though confused. “Yes, it’s alright. Of course, it’s alright. It’s just… I’m having a hard time thinking of the last time someone was at my service.”

Fair play, Ramiren.

“Mm, let’s not get maudlin.”

Ramiren looked taken aback, and then laughed. “Well played.”

Placing the melted candle down on the footboard of the bed, I went on, “We are not as unalike as I might have originally believed. We both seek to provide services to others. We are, at our core, giving people.”

Ramiren crossed his arms. “Mm, though I’d wager our upbringing was vastly different.”

“Quite possibly. You said you moved around often when you were younger. Why is that?” I sat on his bed and almost groaned at the softness under me.

Right. Feather bed. Lucky man.

“Oh. I probably should have expected that question.” He puffed out his cheeks and blew out air, as though weighing the question.

And his answer. Ramiren lowered himself beside me on the bed and ran his hands up and down his thighs.

Finally, he spoke, “My parents were entertainers. They put on shows for the city’s children during the day.

For the adults at night. We played for thrown change.

We were not wealthy by any means, but we survived. We had enough.”

I sat up, intrigued. “Do you sing then, Ramiren?”

“Yes, though not nearly to your and your sister’s caliber. My mother had the voice. My father played the fiddle. I played the pan flute. Accompanying her as she sang stories to an eager crowd.”

Picturing Ramiren as a young boy entertaining a crowd made me grin. “Where are they now? Your parents? Still traveling Laeth, entertaining children?”

He pursed his lips and remained silent. I knew enough of him to understand what that meant, and there was pain in his red eyes. There was no way I could not bring myself to pry.

My hand moved to rest on his, giving it a squeeze in comfort. “I am sorry for asking.”

He gave me a wan smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “It’s alright.”

Change the gods-damned subject, Nathalia.

“Do you remember any songs from your youth? I’d love to hear you sing sometime.”

Laughter burst from him. “No, you would not. I am quite out of practice.”

“No, I would! Believe me, I would. Maybe someday, I will. After this business with the mischief hags is concluded, you’ll feel the need to sing.” I raised my eyebrows and muttered, “Gods above, I know I will.”

He chuckled softly. “I will feel simple relief and gladness, I suspect. Bursting into song requires stronger emotions.”

What would those stronger emotions look like on him? He was certainly intense. What would true rage look like with him? Devastation? Happiness? Would he throw things? Quietly seethe? Would I see his shoulders shake if he were sad? Tears if he were happy?

I resigned myself to never getting the answers to those questions.

Though I’d love to see him happy. A different sort of smile on his face.

One of joy. Of pure, unadulterated joy. I’d like to see that someday.

“Anyway, back to my original question. What would you have of me on your birthday? We could do anything you wished. As I said, I am at your service.”

He pondered a moment, until a sudden thought lit his eyes. “Do you consent to leave?”

As I nodded, he snapped his fingers, and we were back in the bedroom.

“I have an idea. Something I would like to try. It’s, at its core, a lesson. But something fun, I think.” He approached me, placing his rough hands on either side of my face. He lowered his mouth to mine in a gentle kiss, his forked tongue licking over mine.