Page 25 of The Pactbound Angel (The Soul Mirror Duet #1)

We set out, after consulting the map and Ramiren’s notes, to leave the swamp with a northbound heading. We managed to retrace our steps through the mire, finally making it onto dry land just south of Puldoni. We met up with the now crowded eastern road and headed toward the Tanta Desert.

After an hour, dodging wagons, carts, and cranky drovers, Raewyn’s whining began. “Why do we have to walk everywhere? Can’t we get horses?”

“No, Raewyn. We’re just fine traveling on foot.

Besides, the horses here aren’t like the horses back home.

” I motioned to one of the six-legged feyhorses nearby.

His master was trying to pull him forward with the reins, but the animal wouldn’t budge.

After giving a mighty heave, the feyhorse moved just enough for his master to fall on his rear in the dirt.

The feyhorse sauntered past with a stuttering wheeze .

Is it laughing?

One had almost trampled us when leaving Puldoni. I blamed the rider, idiot fey that he was, but that did not stop me from noticing the feyhorse almost bit Ramiren when he passed us.

Raewyn clicked her tongue unhappily. “But maybe we could try?”

“Perhaps we can try after we leave the Tanta Desert. We might have to go into the mountains there. That’s no place for a horse, no matter how many legs it has.”

Raewyn grumbled, and Georgina shook her head from her perch on M.A.L.C.O.L.M.’s shoulder. “Quit your bellyaching. It’s annoying me.”

“Easy for you to say, Georgina. You’re not walking,” Raewyn replied bitterly.

I took the excuse to talk to him that I’d been given. “Ramiren, how are you holding up?”

Ramiren looked back at me and smiled as though we had never argued. The nervous knot in my belly tightened. “I am just fine. My boots are comfortable, thank Jessina.”

Jessina, the Goddess of Law. And, by extension, contracts.

It made sense that the Arbiter of the Gods would be his patroness.

Deals and contracts were often stamped with her sigil in an attempt to curry her favor in the bargain.

But it was odd that he would thank her at that moment. I asked him why.

Ramiren chuckled. “Old habit. I tend to thank her whenever my life goes according to plan.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Does your life often go according to plan?”

He looked back at me again with a grin. “Often.”

My other eyebrow went up. “Often?”

He faced forward again. “Yes, the pieces often fall where they should. If they don’t, and rarely they don’t, I can always adjust.”

“Would you two keep it down? I can’t hear my own misery,” Raewyn hissed in pain as she stepped on a large pebble. “Why me? Why did you allow me to do this, Nat? How do you live like this?”

I hesitated before speaking, to make sure my tone was even and patient, “We’ll get you better shoes in the next town, Raewyn. ”

“And maybe a piece of fabric to stuff in her mouth.” Georgina smirked from her perch.

“Uncalled for, Georgina.” It was a little called for.

Beep. “YES, UNCALLED FOR, GEORGINA.”

Georgina casually propped her elbow on the top of the automaton’s head. “When I get my tools back, M.A.L.C.O.L.M., I’m turning off your voice box.”

Beep. “THEN WHO WILL TALK TO YOU, GEORGINA?”

My hand hid a smirk as Georgina smacked the automaton on the forehead.

The journey toward the Tanta Desert was blessedly uneventful, except for the occasional mutter from Raewyn, subsequent mocking from Georgina, and the obstinate feyhorses that caused more than one traffic interruption.

The quiet gave me ample opportunity to think while enjoying the lush floral landscape containing every rainbow color.

There were no orange trees in the meadow of vibrant red, purple, and white flowers, but I definitely smelled oranges.

The strange scent only added to my confusion.

Though I had concluded that I had nowhere near earned his deepest thoughts and secrets, the question remained. Could I trust him?

The thought made my head and heart hurt.

A crystal clear butterfly fluttered past, a yellow light on its backend blinking rhythmically, like fireflies back home.

My eyes followed its path, admiring the way the sunlight hit its iridescent wings, until a passing fey with eight eyes and eight legs jumped up and caught it in mid-air.

The butterfly was swallowed before he hit the ground.

Arachne fey .

I made a face and went back to what I apparently did best: overthinking everything.

Having freely shared my own secrets, without asking for his, he was also right.

None of us ever asked if the hags stole from him, including me.

If his secrets were wanted, I should have asked for them instead of throwing a tantrum that he wasn’t a mind reader.

Unmet expectations were the root of all disagreements.

That was one lesson Ramiren didn’t have to teach me.

It wasn’t the secrets that I wanted. I wanted to know him, yes. But it was the trust he’d have in disclosing them that I desired.

With a loud sigh, which caused everyone to look my way, I rubbed my eyes. “Tired. Apologies.”

Ramiren’s gaze stayed on me a little longer than everyone else’s.

His red eyes bored into me, as though trying to suss out my thoughts.

I met his look for a second before focusing on the landscape again.

He looked almost disappointed in me, and that stung the most. I’ll talk to him about it this evening, once we reach Ghau.

Making a mental note to purchase as much water as my already burdened pouch could hold for the journey through the Tanta Desert, my thoughts turned to what would need replacing in my dwindling food supply.

Raewyn tripped, barely catching herself, and wailed in anguish. “This damned road!”

And new boots for Raewyn. My patience is wearing as thin as the soles of her shoes.

Raewyn flexed her feet forward and back, admiring the soft leather of her boots. “So comfortable. They even put sheepskin on the bottom!”

I sat across from her at a long table in the Soggy Rooster Inn, which Raewyn saw the sign for and emphatically insisted we stay there, though she refused to tell me why.

My tired arms propped up my tired head, watching her gaze lovingly at her new purchase.

Or, rather, my new purchase for her. After getting my greaves repaired, she’d been promptly pulled into a leatherworking shop for proper traveling footwear.

She argued, begging for silk slippers. I had to talk her into something a bit more practical.

“They should ensure your comfort and be very protective,” I replied, nursing a glass of Dulon white. It was delicious, though expensive, given it had to be transported from Laeth.

I need to get a small wineskin of this before I leave Ghau.

“Like you, Nat.” Raewyn grinned at me.

I closed my eyes for a brief moment and bit my lips to keep from smirking. “Sure. Like me.”

To my side, Ramiren sat drinking his own wine. He had been quiet, obviously mulling something over. A sharp pain went through my chest at the random idea he was considering ending our pact over our disagreement.

Why is this so damned messy?

I rubbed my eyes. Be realistic. You two are being intimate. It’s only natural to develop certain feelings. Perhaps, it’d be best if you ended it before you develop inconvenient ones...

“No!” I shrieked, aloud.

Everyone turned to me, even a few patrons sitting near our table looked over. My face burned, and my hand flew to cover my mouth.

“I… apologies.” I tried to swallow my embarrassment, which stuck like a lump in my throat. Raewyn furrowed her eyebrows at me, then shrugged as though she had not a care in the world and went back to looking at her new boots.

Georgina snickered and muttered mockingly, “No!”

Beep. “YES!”

Georgina looked at M.A.L.C.O.L.M., and grinned. “No!”

Beep. “YES!”

I slowly rubbed my forehead. A headache is definitely forming.

“No!”

Beep. “NO! ”

“Yes!”

A soft beep followed a strange grinding sound that seemed to be M.A.L.C.O.L.M.’s laughter. “I TRICKED YOU, GEORGINA. I MADE YOU SAY SOMETHING YOU DID NOT INTEND.”

Georgina shook her head and started going over the finer points of verbal manipulation to M.A.L.C.O.L.M.

Taking the mockery with as much dignity as I could muster, a soft whisper cut through the noise, “Are you alright?”

“Hm?” His question sunk in. “Oh. Yes, I am fine. Just thinking.”

“About what, if I may ask?”

Oh, so you can learn all you wish to know of me, but I cannot learn the same?

The bitter thought startled me, and I pushed it down deep . Oh. Sure. Because miscommunication solves everything, doesn’t it? He asked. You never did. He is only curious, perhaps even wishes to help me. Now, for the love of Horyn, stop acting like a child.

I replied low, whispering so no one else could hear, “I was thinking of our pact. That’s all.”

A concerned look crossed his eyes, but his smile persisted. “Oh?”

“Yes. Just going over it in my head.”

He studied me, his facial expression not changing. “And? What did you come up with that made you exclaim so suddenly?”

My face burned hotter. “It’s not important.” I briefly contemplated telling him but didn’t want to get into something I wasn’t prepared to fully explain.

Then a thought occurred to me. “Why did you never tell us that the mischief hag had your ability to whistle?”

His smile faded. “I told you. You did not ask.”

My head tilted downward. “But when I do ask, you avoid the question.”

Ramiren spoke, as though the reply was obvious, “As is my right. Remember, I said you can request anything if you can stand hearing no as a reply. You’re asking the wrong question, Nathalia. Ask the right one.”

My teeth gritted painfully in frustration as I slouched into my chair, the back of my head hitting the wooden backing.

But what’s the right ques-

Oh.

“Would you have avoided the question had I asked if one of the hags stole something from you?”

His smile returned, as though pleased. He swirled his wine glass and watched the liquid agitate. “No, I would not have. I simply make it a habit of not sharing information about myself.”

You can’t know if you don’t ask. “Why?”

Ramiren sighed, his shoulders rising and falling with his deep breath, and set his glass down.

He leaned forward with his clasped hands on the table.

“Nathalia… I know what I am. I am a broodling with more than a little resemblance towards my ancestors. I use that to my advantage in making pacts. If people fear me, my kind, it makes them more pliable to terms and less likely to try to trick me or someone I am dealing on behalf of. The less they know of me, the better. Sometimes an assumption can be the difference between death and a mutually beneficial pact.” He gave me a hard look that immediately softened. “Does that help you?”

I stared at him, jaw dropped. Finally. Something. “Why share that information with me, then? Now?”

“Because you do not fear me, at least no longer. I do trust you, despite my hesitation to share. And I hope, despite the lack of information I provide, you trust me.” He tipped his head downward, looking at me over the rims of his glasses.

“You trust me because I keep nothing from you.”

He replied without lifting his head, “I trust you because of who you are, Nathalia. Not because of what you can give me, even information.”

It felt as though he was making a firm point. I decided to make a point of my own. “Trust is earned, Ramiren. It is not something that comes without a price paid, in some form or another. Everything has a price.”

“That, I think, we can both agree on,” he murmured as he took a drink of wine.

The knot in my belly returned. When the time came, would I be willing to pay?

I firmly put to rest the idea of ending the lessons, ending the pact.

What harm could it do now? I’ve already paid that price.