Page 61 of The Lovely and the Lost

Think. As long as I was thinking, I was in control.Gabriel knelt next to the stone circle,I thought. He’d said it wasn’t a natural formation, but that was all.

“Gabriel and Andrés built this Circle,” the sheriff said, tapping two fingers against the picture with the fort. “Their mother was a Turner before she married Daniel Cortez, and the Turners are one of five founding families, the very people most likely to remember—and keep—a tradition as archaic as this one.”

Founding families.I thought about the book the librarian had given me. I tried to keep thinking, but an unsettled feeling slithered through my gut.Why didn’t Gabriel say something? Why pretend he had no idea what the Circle was?

The sheriff slammed the folder shut, hard enough to shake the table. I flinched. Was he trying to scare me? Maybe he’d expected me to say something. Maybe I’d waited too long to reply.

This room was too small.

The door was shut.

I felt a change in his demeanor, like the rattle on a snake, sending warning vibrations in the air. An instant later, all trace of tension on the sheriff’s face was gone, like I’d imagined it, like he’d never lost his temper.

“What were you doing in Alden yesterday?” The question was reasonable, and so, his manner implied, was the man.

Answer. Answer, and he won’t hurt you. Answer, and he’ll leave you alone.

“We heard there was a development in the search for Bella.”

“Who heard?” the sheriff prodded. “You?”

No. Gabriel was the one with the police scanner. He was the one who’d decided to go—the rest of us had tagged along for the ride.

“I am not your enemy here,” the sheriff told me.

The muscles in the back of my neck tightened, one by one. He’d scared me. He’dtriedto scare me. “You’re not my friend.”

The sheriff flipped open a second folder. There was a photograph on top: a filthy child crouched in the corner of a hospital room, her hair in knots, her skin caked with mud and blood.

If I’d been capable of moving, I would have squeezed my eyes shut.

“You’ve had a difficult life.” The sheriff turned the picture around so that I was staring straight into the eyes of my younger self. “I understand that, Kira. I understand how you could look at someone like Gabriel and feel like you were looking at some dark, twisted version of yourself.”

I couldn’t look away from the photo. If the sheriff had thought this would jar me into talking, he’d miscalculated.

He’d shown me Girl.

“How strong you must have been,” the sheriff murmured, “to survive.”

Jaw hurts.I was grinding my teeth. Inside I was shaking. Outside, I was frozen.Everything hurts.

“How naïve of Cady,” the sheriff continued gently, “to think that you could ever be anything but an animal.”

No.

“A dirty little animal. That’s what you are, isn’t it? If you weren’t, you’dwantto help Bella. You’d want to help me.” He was standing. He was walking around to my side of the table. “I’m sure Gabriel has been filling your head with lies. He likes to talk, and he’s perceptive enough to use your…historyto try for common ground.”

“I’m not an animal.”My chair clattered to the floor. If I’d been in my right mind, I would have stood my ground. Instead, I skittered backward.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” The sheriff took one step toward me, then another. “I’ve given you no reason to be afraid of me.”

Control.I had to stay in control.Breathe in. Breathe out.“I want to leave now. You can’t keep me here.”

“I can if I’m concerned that you’re a threat to yourself or others.” He was within a few feet of me now. “It would be a shame to have to tell Cady that, despite all her work, you’re still what your mother made you.”

“Cady. Is. My. Mother.” If I could form words, I could think them, think:He can’t hurt me. It’s just talk. He can’t do anything but talk.

My back was up against the wall. The tangled mess of thoughts and images in my brain flashed in pace with my heart, racing, pounding.