Page 28 of The Liar I Married

TWENTY-FIVE

NOW

I need to get away. John’s presence is overpowering, his magnetism drawing me toward him, taking away my will.

After all I’ve been through with him, nothing diminishes the love I have for him.

It’s like a chain around my neck holding me back from making decisions.

I’ve always believed that love is something a person should cherish and not use against others.

My mind flashes back to a chat I had with an old friend from school.

Jane was a straight shooter and I miss her terribly since she was lost at sea in a boating accident.

I confided in no one but her about my suspicions early on in my marriage.

She told me to take the girls and leave, that John wasn’t worth it and I could get anyone I wanted.

I told her I could never leave him and she said I remind her of an old faithful dog that the owner chains up, when they don’t have time for it.

Her words flow into my mind and I stagger to my feet.

I feel vulnerable using the walker; being weak will give John another excuse not to be with me heart and soul.

One thing is for sure, he’ll never let his clients see me like this.

I wonder sometimes why he chose me, as it’s obvious by the way he parades Ms. Lawson that he really wanted a trophy wife.

Another memory breaks into my consciousness, a smiling face and an infectious laugh. I need to concentrate to bring the fuzzy image to life. It comes back in a rush. I remember everything. Alex.

I grip the handles of the walker and move painfully slowly to the door. The memory of my friend Alex lightens my mood. I wonder if he knows I’m awake or even alive? Heat rushes up my neck and into my cheeks as I turn to John. “I’m going to the library. I need a little time to think.”

“I’m so proud of you, Jessie.” John opens the door and stands to one side.

“It’s only been a week and look at you getting around.

Dolly has been giving you physical therapy to keep your muscles strong but I’ll ask her to recommend a physical therapist. I’ll make sure they come by as often as necessary to help you increase your strength, then you won’t need to rely on the walker. ”

I turn to look at him and see compassion in his eyes. Am I seeing the truth or is this another illusion? “That would be good, thank you. I would really like a phone and a line of credit so I can purchase the things I need.”

“Just ask Dolly what you need and she’ll get it for you.” John frowns. “Who do you need to contact?”

I shake my head and look at him. “I needed to speak to Mr. Collins and I figured maybe you might want to talk to me from time to time. It’s very lonely here.

I know Dolly looks after me really well and I’m sure she’s trying to be a friend but I’ve been restricted from having visitors.

I can’t see my family and yet you allowed two women I hardly know to visit the other day. ”

“I did no such thing. I wasn’t informed of any visitors.

” John frowns and the wrinkles in his forehead mar his perfect features.

“I didn’t want my mother to come here either but she had a bee in her bonnet and had made arrangements before you woke.

You know what she’s like, always trying to organize everybody.

” He sighs. “You say you didn’t recognize the visitors? ”

I snort a laugh. “Is this a trick question?”

“No, of course it isn’t, why would you think such a thing?” John looks abashed.

I push my walker toward the library. “Don’t worry about it.

Why don’t you take Ms. Lawson down to the kitchen?

Maria will make her a cup of coffee or whatever fancy tea she drinks.

I’m sure you’ll need a few moments to chat to Mr. Collins.

” I turn and shoot him a long look. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere. ”

I bypass the library as John enters the family room and ushers Mr. Collins and Ms. Lawson back into the office, no doubt to discuss my state of mind.

I’m on the ground floor and gather it’s the only floor not closed and with the furniture draped in dust covers.

Many years ago, the ground floor was for the servants.

Now many of the staff live in the cottages spread across the expanse of the estate.

I make my way to the kitchen and find it empty.

My heart pounds as I glide across the floor to the telephone.

It’s a landline attached to the wall and has been there since I was a child.

Beside it on a small table is a notepad and a jar of pens resting on top.

My heart picks up the pace as I lift the receiver.

I press the number for directory assistance and excitement rushes through me at the sound of a voice.

I give Alex’s name and address. The voice gives me a number and I hurry to write it down.

I press in the number, so slowly, terrified of making a mistake.

I look all around and listen for footsteps.

A familiar voice answers the phone. “Alex? It’s Jessie. I’m alive.”

“Jessie? Oh my goodness, it’s so good to hear your voice. Where are you?”

I tell him and give him a brief explanation of why I’m calling.

“I sneaked down to the kitchen to use the phone. They’ve cut me off from everyone, well, apart from my lawyer, and I insisted that he come.

They want me to sign everything over to John.

I believe they’re trying to make out I’m losing my mind. ”

“I’ve heard nothing about you from anyone since the accident.

” He sounds calm and his usual self. “There was a small column in the local newspaper saying that you were in a coma. Another said you were brain-dead and your husband was going to make the heartbreaking decision to turn off your life support. I honestly believed you died, even though I didn’t see any funeral notices in the paper.

I asked after you, but Michael refused to talk about the accident, saying it was just too disturbing. ”

I listen with interest. “So you knew about the accident? Do you know what happened? I can’t recall a thing, about that night or maybe a few days prior.

My life was in a mess. I can remember everything that happened with my father.

Over the last twenty-four hours or so everything is coming back to me about that time.

I recall going to the office with you to speak to my father and the fallout.

After that it becomes a little fuzzy but it’s only been a week.

” I take a deep breath. “Can you come and see me and help me sort out my mind? I need to know what happened that night.”

“Everything I know about that night is hearsay. You know Grande Haven lives on gossip.” He clears his throat. “Are you sure you want to know about this?”

Sweat trickles down my back as I scan all around, waiting to be caught. “Yes, I do, but I haven’t got much time. They’ve disabled all the phones in the house apart from this one. I have no communication with anyone. Their excuse is that I need to discover the truth myself.”

“If that’s what the doctors believe is best for you, maybe I shouldn’t get involved?”

I feel my only chance slipping away. “Please, Alex, you’re the only person I can trust.”

“Okay I’ll try but they might not let me in.

” I could hear him walking from one room to the other.

“I’ll come and see you tomorrow. In the meantime I’ll hunt around and see if I can find out any other information for you.

The only thing I know for sure is that you had an argument with John, that went on for some time before you left in the SUV.

It was around ten and they didn’t find you until after midnight. ”

I hear doors opening along the passageway and panic grips my stomach.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. You’ll need the code to get through the gate, so write it down.

There’s a keypad on the driver’s side.” I give him the details.

“Don’t use the front door. Walk around the house until you find a rose garden.

There’s a conservatory at the back of the house with a door to the garden.

The conservatory leads to a passageway and to a sunroom and that’s where I am.

” A noise in the passageway makes my heart race.

“Someone is coming and they can’t know that I’ve used the phone. I must go.”

“I’ll find you.”

Voices echo along the empty passageway, as I hang up the receiver.

I shuffle to the counter, I grab a cup from a shelf, and quickly fill it with coffee from the machine.

I’m sitting at the table, adding the fixings, when Dolly walks into the room and stares at me.

“Hi Dolly.” I give her a bright smile. “I was just heading to the library when I smelled the coffee. Do you want a cup?”

“No, I’m fine. I’ve been searching the house for you. Mr. Harper told me you were in the library.” She places one hand firmly under my arm. “I believe he’d like to speak to you. I’ll carry the coffee.”

She is silent as she escorts me back to the library.

I make myself comfortable in the chair by the window and Dolly closes the door as she leaves.

Excitement shivers through me at the thought of seeing Alex again.

It’s not as if I have any romantic notions toward him.

It’s never been like that between us. We just like each other’s company.

I sip my coffee and realize having John so close is disturbing me and I really don’t know why.

Maybe it’s a second sense that is warning me of danger?

The argument we had before the accident must have been bad for me to run away.

I wonder where I was going? Where did I wreck the SUV and why didn’t John come after me?

So many questions and they’re all locked inside my head.

I wonder if they will ever emerge out of the fog?