Page 12

Chapter

Twelve

Brex didn’t push Clara to hike any cliffs over the next few days, but he knew they needed to. They were running out of time, and it was the only way to draw out the murderer.

Watching Clara throw up and holding her while she cried had been a gut punch. She was petrified he would die. He could try to claim her panic was because she’d watched three other boyfriends die, but it felt much deeper than that.

The genuine angel had told him she loved him. That had slugged him harder than anything. How could she love someone like him? Brex. Not the image of a successful, tough, suave, Range Rover driving operative for Aiden Porter. Simply him. She didn’t even know what car he drove. He’d never bragged to her that he owned a condo in ultra-expensive San Diego.

Clara saw him and believed that he was good. That befuddled him. Shouldn’t a light-filled being see darkness and want to stay away from it? Her light was so bright that maybe it eradicated the darkness and that was why she couldn’t see it. That was how it felt when he was with her.

She’d claimed she loved him no matter that he didn’t have faith. That blew his mind. Alayna had dumped him because he didn’t have enough faith, clout, or money and her dad wanted her to be with a ‘substantial man of faith’. He hadn’t been enough for Alayna.

Clara couldn’t care less about clout or money. She cared who he was.

What would she do when she found out he was a liar?

Her faith was extremely important to her, but she wouldn’t push him away for not believing. How could she be so genuine and good?

All he wanted was to be near Clara, see the light sparkle from her jade-colored eyes and that cute smile on her face, hold her close and kiss her. Be the man she thought he was.

He’d counseled with Nick on drawing the murderer out and his uneasiness with the case, but he hadn’t admitted that he’d fallen in love with Clara and was messing this case up because of that or possibly because of his lack of experience in cases like this. Yet how many cases were there like this? It was as unique as the woman he’d fallen in love with.

He wanted to proclaim his love for Clara to her and to the world, but he couldn’t. Not yet.

When Nick called two days before Clara was supposed to leave for Africa, Brex was driving to the police station. He pushed the button to take the call in his Range Rover.

“Brex,” Nick greeted him, friendly as ever. “Anything new?”

“No.” He drove with one hand, squinting a bit. Even with sunglasses on, the sun was bright in this desert valley. He liked the red sandstone and desert landscape, though he imagined he’d always prefer the green mountains of his youth. Especially as the temperatures were soaring into the hundreds in the afternoons now that it was almost June. He definitely preferred summer days with highs in the eighties like Colorado or San Diego’s temperate climate.

“Clara flies out in two days,” he reminded Nick. “Do I tell the Hendrys we’ll have to try again when she returns?” What could he accomplish without Clara here?

His gut tightened at the thought of Clara leaving, of giving up on her or the case. He saw no clear path, and it made him sick. He was going to lose a million dollars, the chance to prove himself successful, but more importantly … he was going to lose Clara.

“Or tell them the case is too cold, with no real evidence, and might never be solved?” Nick asked.

“That is an option.” His hands grew slick on the steering wheel. Surprisingly, it wasn’t just the loss of all that money that gave him cold sweats. It was fear of how Clara would react when he could finally tell her the truth.

“Don’t take this too hard, Brex. Sometimes the clues, the evidence, the killer, they just aren’t there. But you know that from years as a detective.”

“True,” he agreed, pulling into the parking lot of the police station. How could he express his fear of failing when Nick had just told him not to take it too hard? This was a cold case with little to no evidence. Maybe it wasn’t his fault for falling in love with the prime suspect.

He smiled at that. Clara was no suspect, and he’d been doomed the day they met. There was no way to resist her angelic and genuine nature.

“You have no suspicions of Clara Gem being the murderer like the Hendrys believe?” Nick clarified.

“None at all.” Did he say that strong enough? Did he need to describe the way she’d lost all the color in her face and vomited, crying and trembling, because she couldn’t handle the thought of him falling to his death? That was only one of hundreds of experiences where Clara had shown her angelic and benevolent nature. No way on the earth was Clara any kind of murderer.

“We might have to call it.” Nick paused. “I need someone in Venezuela. With your dark coloring and unknown face, we might be able to get you into a trafficking ring that has eluded us for a few years. How’s your Spanish?”

“ Es justo a medio ,” he said, ‘fair to middle’.

“ Bien .” Nick chuckled. “Are you ready for a change?”

“Honest truth … I’d love a change, a challenge. I need to see if I’m cut out for this or if this job is indicative of how I’ll do in the private sphere.”

Maybe that was too honest, but Nick needed to know he had some doubts about himself and his abilities.

Officer Chase Tenley parked next to him in his restored Ford truck. He wondered why Chase was in his personal vehicle and not his Durango Pursuit. He liked Chase. The guy was near his age and had a humility you didn’t always see on the force.

“I think you are cut out for this, Brex,” Nick said. “I think you’re ready.”

Brex appreciated Nick’s vote and support, but with the honesty starting, he couldn’t stop there. “More honest truth, Nick …” He drew in a breath, then let it out. “I don’t know how I’ll walk away from Clara. I love her.”

There was a pause, then Nick let out a low whistle. “I wondered.”

Brex leaned back against the headrest, raising a hand to Chase as he exited his truck and walked into the station.

“You going to call this quits before you give us a chance?” Nick asked.

“I don’t know. Everything’s a mess inside me. I love her. She’s a genuine angel, but I’ve been lying to her this entire time. I still feel like there could be a murderer out there, but I can’t find him or her. I don’t want to leave her, but I want to work with you and Aiden and be a security op.” He couldn’t believe he was being this honest with his supervisor, but it had been stirring inside him for a while and it was a relief to get it out. If only he could be this transparent with Clara. Would she hate him? Maybe.

There was silence, then Nick said, “I get it. I’m married to an angel, and I had to lie to Darcy when I fell in love with her.”

“What?” He knew Nick’s wife ran children’s homes in Mexico and Nick was there as often as he could be.

“Darcy’s ex-husband was a drug dealer and murderer. I was working to bring him down when I got paired with Darcy on the Chance for Charity reality television show, Mercedes Belle’s brainchild.”

Brex remembered those shows that had aired last fall. He’d watched a couple and thought they were intriguing and fast-paced. He wanted to find Nick’s episode now.

“Some of your SDPD buddies assumed Darcy was in league with her ex, Johnny Trattori.”

Brex knew that name. How could he live in San Diego, be on the police force, and not know a scum like Trattori? He hadn’t been assigned to Trattori’s case, but he’d heard of Trattori’s traitorous ex, Darcy Saint. He’d had no idea it was Darcy Jacobs, Nick’s wife. How intriguing that Nick had been involved in the capture of his wife’s ex. This story was almost as messed up and confusing as Brex and Clara’s.

“I was leery at first, but I couldn’t resist Darcy’s angelic sweetness, and I fell hard for her. I don’t think you want to hear all the details about our love story.” There was a smile in Nick’s voice.

Brex chuckled. “Not particularly. But you were lying to her the entire time?” he clarified, a knot in his chest loosening. Angelic sweetness was exactly how he’d describe Clara. Nick had lied and it had obviously worked out for him and Darcy. Could it work out for Brex and Clara? Could he tell her all and beg her to forgive him?

“Yeah. It about tore me apart.”

“That’s how I feel.”

“It sucks.”

“Yeah, it does.”

Chief Randall and two other officers walked out of the building. They turned to their cars. Only the chief saw him and raised a hand. Brex waved back, but he wasn’t ending this conversation for anything.

“But Darcy forgave you when you told her the truth?”

“She was devastated and thought she couldn’t trust me. It was a rough couple weeks, but Aiden helped me with a grand gesture and the rest of the story is magical.”

He could hear the tease in Nick’s voice, but Brex was happy it had worked out for them. Would it work out for him, or would Clara never forgive him?

“I need to tell her the truth.” Brex knew it deep down. It was past time.

“The Hendrys are your only issue there.”

“True.” He pushed out a breath. “Do we close this case?” He couldn’t believe he’d said that. A million dollars, his future … gone.

Clara was his future. If he could work things out with her.

Nick had confidence in him. He still had a shot with him and Aiden. There would be other opportunities to make a huge paycheck again. Maybe. It felt like giving up his future firstborn son to say goodbye to a million dollars and all he thought the money could do for him and his future.

“I think this case was a witch hunt from the Hendrys,” Nick said, breaking into his thoughts. “It’s tragic they lost their son, but you’re certain Clara is innocent and there are no other leads. The jade stones might always be a mystery.”

That bothered him, but if Clara would forgive him, maybe someday they’d figure out the mystery together. All that mattered to him now was being with Clara.

“Okay. I’ll work things out with Clara and go to Venezuela for you. She’s going to be in Africa for three weeks anyway.” It hurt to think of being apart from Clara, and it made him uneasy. What if they couldn’t work it out and she wouldn’t forgive him?

At least he’d be done with the lies and a case that had no resolution. Even if it meant he had to sell his Range Rover or his condo and may never wear a Brioni suit. Those things were empty compared to Clara’s light and love.

“Let’s do it,” Nick said.

Relief filled him at Nick’s quick answer.

“Should I go visit the Hendrys and terminate the assignment?” he asked.

A million dollars down the drain. Eight weeks ago, that would’ve devastated him. Now the only thing that could devastate him was Clara not loving him. He didn’t need the validation of the money or success. He needed Clara. He smiled, thinking of her, though his worry that she’d hate him when he came clean made his gut churn.

“I’ll call them,” Nick said. “They’ll be upset that you didn’t find proof Clara was the murderer. You don’t need to get in the middle of that. I’m an objective outsider at this point, and it’s my call to close the case. If they want to hire someone else, that’s their prerogative. But I’ll firmly discourage them from that course.”

“That’s all true,” Brex admitted. “But I need to call them. It’s my case.” He wanted to protect Clara from the Hendrys and any accusations. He’d insist that there were no leads, no murderer.

“I can respect that.”

Brex liked the respect he heard in Nick’s voice. Maybe not as much as the million dollars, but he liked Clara a million times more than the million dollars. He smiled at the cliché.

“We’ll chat soon.”

“Okay. And Nick? Thank you.”

“Of course.”

The line went dead.

Brex sat there for a few beats. He felt … free. He was done with this case, trying to investigate Clara or her family and friends. He was done reporting to the Hendrys. Well, in a minute he would be.

He forced himself to press his finger on their contact information.

Rulon answered after one ring. “Brex?”

“Rulon.” His heart thumped quicker, and his palms grew sweaty. He shook his wrist and glanced at his watch. “I’ve wrapped up the case and I’m calling with my preliminary findings.”

“Okay.” Rulon sounded excited. A few beats, then, “We’re both here. Did you find the proof that Clara murdered Malik?”

His hands and heart settled. “No.”

“No?” Pamela shrieked.

“There is no proof of any kind of murder,” Brex said, confidence infusing him. “I’m sorry, but Malik’s death is a tragic accident and this case is closed. I’ll send over a full written report.”

“No! You’re wrong. Clara Gem killed my son,” Pamela cried out.

“There’s absolutely no proof of that, ma’am. Clara Gem is innocent.”

“How dare you?” Pamela screamed at him. “You fell for her! How could you?”

Brex felt compassion for this mother, but it didn’t change the truth or how angelic Clara was.

“I will be speaking to Aiden Porter about this,” Rulon threatened.

“You have every right to do that. I’ve consulted throughout the case with him and Nick Jacobs, and they agree with me.”

Aiden would back Brex up.

Pamela’s screams muted and Rulon growled into the phone. “You’re willing to give up a million dollars for that woman?”

How they’d guessed he’d fallen for Clara he couldn’t be sure, but the entire valley had bought that they were together.

A million dollars. It would’ve ripped him apart to lose it … before he fell in love with Clara.

“Clara Gem is innocent. That is irrefutable. I hope you and your wife can find peace and move past your son’s death.”

“Don’t you dare tell me how to move past my son’s death!” Rulon yelled. “You’re finished. And I’ll find a way to finish Aiden Porter as well!”

The line went dead.

Brex hated the way that conversation had gone but hadn’t expected much better. He’d had ugly conversations plenty of times in his years as a detective. He’d warn Nick and Aiden that the Hendrys would most likely try to press lawsuits or defame them, but he knew he had his boss’s support.

Now he was free of any association with the Hendrys, any guilt, and he’d given up a million dollars to prove, at least in his mind, that Clara meant everything to him.

He had to tell Clara the truth. Only two days before they’d go their separate ways. He had to find the perfect moment. If only he could pray that she’d forgive him, but he didn’t have any faith that God would help him. He’d been too distant.

He thought of a story his grandpa had told him of an old cowboy caught in a blizzard with a dead truck battery, praying for God to start the engine. When the cowboy got to heaven, God explained he’d started a truck’s engine in Montana instead of North Dakota in a case of mistaken identity. He’d been confused that the old cowboy had prayed when he hadn’t spoken to God in fifty years.

That was Brex. He’d let himself become distant from God because of Alayna’s rejection and had grown away from the faith of his youth. He’d never denied it or gotten bitter like he’d seen some do, but the darkness he’d seen throughout his years on the police force had taken its toll on him and he’d become selfish and status-driven.

Clara. She was light and joy and everything heaven above would want her to be. What if the good Lord above didn’t want an angel like her with a lying man like him?

He closed his eyes and prayed. “Please, Father. If you can, help Clara not to hate me. Most of all, help her to be happy and to stay genuine and filled with light and Your love. Help me not to hurt her. Amen.”

It was lame as far as prayers went, but he felt good. The conversation with Nick. The closure with the Hendrys. Rising above the lure of the money and the shallow goals that had motivated him for years. Attempting to pray.

Clara was genuinely good. If anyone could forgive him for deceiving them, it was her.

Brex would tell her the truth.

He might be ending all happiness in his life, but he couldn’t be fake anymore.

No matter what, he couldn’t go back to the shallow life he’d led before.