Page 32
Rose got her a dress and jumper. ‘I left clothes under the tree,’ she said, ‘so when you came back you could get dressed before you came here.’
‘Oh. But I didn’t come the same way. Anyway it’s quicker to walk as a wolf.’ Sky’s voice was muffled as she struggled into the clothes. Finally dressed, she stood, fidgeting with her hands and biting her lip.
‘You believed I would come then?’
‘I can believe pretty much anything at the moment,’ Rose answered. ‘Are you hungry or do you want to see Simon first?’
Sky hesitated, her body started to turn, but her feet, slightly blue stayed rooted, Rose handed her some socks and indicated how to put them on. After she’d finished struggling, Sky pulled the sleeves of the jumper down over her hands and bit her lip. She was scowling.
‘What’s the matter, Sky?’ said Rose, sitting down next to her on the end of the bed. ‘I thought you couldn’t wait to see him. Is it because he’s not human at the moment?’
‘Is he angry with me?’
‘Why would he be?’ Rose put her arms round Sky’s shoulders.
‘He thought you’d died. He was so happy when he knew you were still alive.
He couldn’t wait to see you. He was so upset when he realised what you meant about not being able to turn whenever you want to anymore.
He went up into the forest to see if he could see you again.
I guess he didn’t, he seemed upset when he came back. ’
‘I wouldn’t go to him,’ Sky said. ‘I was angry. All those moons and he never looked for me.’
‘He thought you were dead, Sky, just like you thought he was dead.’
Sky snorted.
‘Is he awake?’
‘No, asleep. He wanted to be awake, but we’re not sure if it would be safe for you.’
‘He can’t hurt a wolf.’
‘You’re not a wolf at the moment.’
‘Well if he’s asleep, how can I tell him how angry I am?’
‘There’s a camera in there. It’ll record what’s happening and I can show Simon later. You can say what you’re thinking and when he’s awake, he’ll see that you were here and will know what you thought. You can do that any time. If you want to eat first you can. Are you hungry?’
Sky scowl lightened to a frown. ‘Those slippy worms and that biting soft fruit?’
‘No, Simon made you some rabbit stew, said you’d like that. Come on, I’ll warm some up for you. Then you can go and shout at him if that’s what you want to do. I need to talk to you anyway, so when you’ve finished shouting, we can chat.’
Sky got up and looked out of the window, peering down the street. ‘That woman and that other woman, they’re a long way away.’
‘Good, that’s a relief.’
‘But someone’s coming and he is not kind. He is angry.’
‘The only person who’s coming is Simon’s doctor. Healer. If he hurts Simon, it’s because sometimes that’s the only way to make someone better, like… biting a thorn out of your paw.’
Sky looked askance and followed Rose into the kitchen. ‘Can you do that? I can’t see how you’d get your back paws into your mouth. It’s a long way and humans don’t bend enough.’
‘I meant wolves. It’s the sort of thing wild animals do, isn’t it?’
Sky snorted again. ‘What’s a camera? What’s a recording?’
‘In this case, it’s a small version of the ones they used in the forest to… sort of remember what’s happening in front of it so you can look at it afterwards. It…’ Rose ran out of explanation.
Sky frowned. ‘Oh yes,’ she said. ‘It was very strange. It was never quite the whole truth.’
‘Wasn’t it? But it hadn’t been edited then… I mean, changed.’
‘Nothing is one thing,’ said Sky. ‘Those … cameras only show what they were pointed at. That’s never the whole story, is it?’
Balancing a bowl on her lap a little later, Sky picked out bits of rabbit with her fingers and nibbled. Her first bite had been one of confusion. ‘Is it because my teeth are wrong that this meat is so soft?’
‘It’s easier to eat cooked meat with human teeth,’ Rose suggested, although she didn’t know if that was really true. ‘Do you like it? Simon cooked it specially for you.’
Sky shrugged but kept eating. Rose gave up and turned the TV on. She had expected Sky to be startled, but then remembered that Simon said she used to watch the rushes with him. Presumably he’d explained it to her at the time, and she’d forgotten the words.
Rose’s finger hovered over the play button. She had avoided looking at the film again. Perhaps she’d just show a little of it while Sky was poking at the bits of carrot and onion to see if there was more rabbit.
They watched a few minutes of the early part of the film. Sky chuckled at the shots of the pack, and smiled at Simon. She seemed to have no recognition of herself as a wolf and when Rose pointed her out, she put the bowl down and crawled over to the screen to stare at herself.
‘Is that me? I would look prettier with longer legs. And look at my tail, I should have groomed it. What do you think of how I look?’ she asked.
Rose thought, you look like a wolf . She said, ‘You look beautiful.’
Sky rolled her eyes and snorted again.
‘Well,’ asked Rose. ‘What do you think of how I look?’
Sky put the bowl down and perused Rose from head to foot and shrugged. ‘Human,’ she said. She stood up and walked out of the room. ‘I want to see Simon now.’
In Simon’s room, Rose put on the lamp and made sure the camera was working.
She sat Sky at the top of the cage so that she could stroke Simon’s head and talk to him.
His head was turned away and he appeared to be sleeping.
The thin blanket which had covered his naked human form was kicked to the bottom of the end of the pallet, slightly tangled in his rear paws.
Looking at him as if she didn’t know what he was, Rose saw that the fur was dull and thin in places, the tail was scrawny, the claws dark.
‘See,’ said Sky. ‘I suppose you think Simon is a beautiful wolf too.’
‘No, I think he looks unhealthy.’
‘Oh. Well yes he is. But this kind never is healthy.’
‘What kind? ’
‘The kind that become changers instead of being born changers. Like me.’ She reached in and stroked the back of Simon’s head. He growled softly but didn’t move.
Genetic not viral.
‘Can you tell me about it?’ asked Rose.
Sky went quiet. She continued stroking the fur through the bar and Rose checked the camera again.
She wished Andrew was there to listen. The film would have to do.
It struck her how Sky’s human form was beautiful when Simon’s wolf form was not.
Sky was right, she did have no idea what constituted beauty to a wolf, but it stood to reason that there was some form which appealed more than another.
That was the nature of the universe. Breeding potential and all that.
To her, Sky as a wolf looked healthy and strong.
Simon was a good looking man, so you’d have thought he’d make a good looking wolf, but then perhaps there was a distinction when it was a werewolf rather than a shapeshifter.
After all, the worst she’d ever heard about shapeshifters was …
Rose struggled to remember. Selkies and mermaids, they had a tendency to abandon their human lovers and return to their natural world.
That was it. That was the thing which she had wanted to tell Simon.
‘They say that my grandmother’s grandmother was human,’ said Sky.
‘Who says? Can wolves talk to each other?’
Sky turned and looked at Rose as if she’d grown another head. ‘Of course not, but I can’t find the word for it. We know and what we know, the rest of the pack knows. There is nothing known which is truly secret.’
‘Oh I see.’ Not that Rose did. ‘And your grandmother’s grandmother… so that’s your great-great..’
‘No it means, a female a long time ago, in my blood line.’
‘Ah.’ This was going to be a long explanation.
‘Are you going to listen or interrupt?’
Rose held her hands up in surrender.
Sky frowned and shook her head in disapproval.
She stood and then as she spoke, acted out her words.
‘So my grandmother’s grandmother was human and she was in fear and trouble and she had no pack to care for her but others were chasing her.
She ran into the forest and into a glade where wolves were resting.
She wept, thinking they’d kill her, but they were not hungry, simply curious.
As her pursuers approached, she dropped down on the ground and curled up to protect herself.
The humans came and were so intent on capturing her that they didn’t notice the pack at first. And when a man leaned down to beat her, she reached up with a stone and killed him.
’ Sky was on the floor, her face a mask of horror as she looked at an imaginary rock in her hand.
‘What happened next?’ said Rose, enrapt.
‘As the other humans closed in, they saw the wolves and in terror, they ran away. The woman cried, because she knew that they would come back with weapons and her life would be forfeit and the pack encircled her and as their tears mingled with hers, she begged them to take her with them and her hair shrank and then grew over her body, and her legs and arms became strong and clawed until she was a wolf like other wolves. And she ran with the pack for a long time.’
‘Until she died?’
‘Yes,’ said Sky. ‘But when people started to hunt the wolves to destruction, they sent her daughter to live as a human and mingle with people again to save her. Only she was hunted too, and had to escape in another way. She travelled a long way, for many, many days, and she couldn’t settle as a human.
In the end, she found a pack who would take her in, and she lived as a wolf in a new place. ’ Sky paused, a soft smile on her face.
‘And then?’ said Rose.
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