Page 22 of The Healer and the Wolf, Part One

22

VANESSA

“ G o ahead and drink this for me, would you? It’ll help coat your stomach and intestines,” I said, handing a steaming mug to Ricky.

He was bundled up and lying on my couch.

I would have preferred if he’d showered before settling on my furniture, but he needed a lot more care before he could stand in the shower for that long. Even if I helped him like I had Leo, it wasn’t possible at the moment, and I wasn’t even sure if I would be able to do that for Ricky. What had happened between Leo and me had been special—something born of the connection between us—and while I wanted Ricky to get better, it was different with him.

Even if I was still really pissed at Leo.

I should have been happy we were all safe, but I was still so damn upset about how Leo had handled things. Every time I thought I was over it, I saw the scared employees’ faces, remembered how many times I’d had to crouch behind something to avoid gunfire.

Honestly, I was still grappling with the fact that I’d had a direct hand in killing Chadwicke.

Yes, I’d always been a part of the plan to take him down. In fact, it had been my plan. But there was a huge difference between reconnaissance/auxiliary support and ramming into the warlock with a truck.

I could still hear the sickening thud. The way his head had bounced off the hood before he went flying. The craziest thing was that I didn’t feel bad. In fact, I knew it was a good thing. I was simply struggling with my role in it.

What was I supposed to do now? Go back to my job at the grocery store and pretend I was completely normal? My world was supposed to be my garden and restocking shelves, not vehicular manslaughter.

So, yeah, perhaps that emotional turmoil was making me act a bit harsher toward Leo, but that didn’t change the fact that he had put a lot of people’s lives in danger.

“What is it?” Ricky questioned cautiously, looking to his alpha. Leo nodded. I didn’t take it personally that the beta was suspicious. He’d been through the ringer, and if he wanted the comfort of some extra assurance from his best friend, I wouldn’t hold it against him.

“Tea,” I answered. “But if you mean specifically, it’s a combination of valerian root and chamomile to help you sleep, dried red elm powder to coat your digestive system with healthy mucus, and willow bark, which will help with the pain. This should help you sleep, and your body repair itself enough to get some solid food in you tomorrow. I imagine they didn’t feed you much there.”

Ricky shook his head, and I saw so much hurt cross his features. Every time I saw how much pain he was in, it made me realize that I would hit Chadwicke with the truck all over again, even if it tore me up inside.

Did that make me a hypocrite? Maybe. I didn’t know. My emotions were all over the place.

“Do me a favor and sip it slowly. Once you’re done, I’ll give you some warm broth, then you can pass out.”

“No solids?” he asked, so hopefully.

“Solid foods are for tomorrow. It would shock your system right now. If you’ll excuse me, I need to make some calls.”

I left him in Leo’s company as I went to the kitchen and finished the broth while searching the internet for a wildlife rehabilitation center around Chadwicke’s compound. When I returned with the broth, Ricky’s mug was empty, and his head was bobbing toward his chest.

“You know what, the broth can wait until you’re awake. If you’re that tired, you should just sleep.”

He looked to me with bleary eyes, but when he spoke, his voice was already miles better. While I had picked all the herbs in my tea for their specific medicinal properties, it was always a bit surprising how well shifters responded to them. Had to be that enhanced healing ability they had. “Are you sure? I won’t mess anything up?”

“No, it’ll be fine. Broth is very easy to reheat. You get as much rest as you need.”

It was like he was waiting for my permission, because almost as soon as the words were out of my mouth, his eyes slammed closed, and he slumped into the couch. Leo caught him before Ricky fell off the couch, then arranged his beta in a more comfortable position.

“You know, this wouldn’t be possible without you.” Leo’s voice was soft when he spoke, but when those gorgeous eyes landed on me, they were smoldering with so many emotions. He looked proud and worried. It was a myriad of expressions all at once. “From the moment I remembered him, I was so worried he would be lost to me forever. My best friend. Every alpha needs his beta. We’re two sides of the same coin, meant to balance the pack and keep it healthy.”

It wasn’t anything I didn’t already know, but somehow, Leo had the ability to put so much feeling into anything he uttered. Sighing, I looked at Ricky. Leo and I had to talk things out more clearly.

Even if I didn’t want to.

Because as much as I liked to think of myself as a mature person, there was a large chunk of me that wanted to be angry for a while longer. To just simmer in it and not have to work through the mess going on in my head. But ultimately, I knew that wasn’t fair to Leo or myself.

“Let’s go into the kitchen,” I said flatly. If we were going to go through all the emotional labor of having a mature, adult conversation, I wanted to be around my cats, and since I had just fed them, they were all congregated in the kitchen. I had a feeling it was only a matter of time before Goober and Fork went to investigate our new visitor on the couch, but for the moment, their attention was firmly on their food bowls.

“Okay.”

Leo followed and sat across from me at my small kitchen table. He didn’t say anything, just waited for me to get things started. That made sense. I was the one who had the problem. For a long moment, I had no idea what to say. This wasn’t exactly an issue I’d had to deal with before, and hopefully I never would again.

“Do you understand why I’m upset?”

The best way to have a productive discussion was to figure out if we were on the same page. And while I felt it was obvious why I was upset and how Leo had messed up, he came from a different world. His rules were different.

Leo sighed. “You don’t like how I chose to fight when the gloves came off.”

“That’s one way to put it,” I said. “You scared me, Leo. Your bloodlust, the way you went after people… it was almost demonic. It was like I couldn’t feel you anymore. And it wasn’t just because you were in your wolf form. It’s like you weren’t there at all, and only this killing machine remained. You didn’t care who got hurt. You didn’t care who got caught in the crossfire as long as you got your pound of flesh.”

Once more, Leo’s face was awash with several emotions. I thought he’d interrupt, ask me what I’d expected, but he only listened intently. And to be honest, that made me bolder, made it easier to put my words in the right order.

“I understand we went there to kill someone, but it consumed you. Did you even notice the guards firing their weapons at me because of you? And I don’t know if any children like Rosette were hurt.”

“Rosette?”

“A girl at the party. We were talking about gardens before her mom whisked her away. And I know she wasn’t the only kid there, because the warlock specifically mentioned having activities for the young ones. A lot of those security guards were firing everywhere to hit you. Can you look me in the eyes and tell me you know for a fact that no children were hurt because of that?”

Guilt spread across Leo’s handsome features. He took a long moment to answer, but I didn’t interrupt the silence. Although my patience wasn’t exactly at its best at the moment, I could tell he was thinking. And to me, thinking was better than having a snap answer, because he was making sure he meant what he said.

“No. There are gaps in my memory of what happened. It concerns me. I’m worried I no longer have control over my inner wolf—something I have to have as an alpha.”

“Hearing that scares me.”

Leo met my eyes. “It scares me, too.”

What were we even supposed to do now? I wasn’t certain, but what struck me was how Leo was being completely honest with me. I wasn’t a wolf or a shifter, but I knew it was no small thing for an alpha to admit he was worried of being incapable of leading his pack. Despite the grim news, I valued that immensely.

Even if I didn’t know where this left us—if we were incompatible and from far too different worlds—I did know I could trust Leo to always be honest with me.

“What happened is over, but I feel like you understand where I’m coming from. Am I wrong?”

Leo shook his head. “I do understand where you’re coming from, and I’m ashamed I let myself get so carried away. That I lost sight of the lives that were important. I don’t know what the future is bringing, but I don’t want that to happen ever again.”

I stared at the shifter across from me. Who would have thought the nearly mute and overwhelmed shell of a man who had stood covered in rags in my kitchen turn out to be so eloquent? Maybe I really was making a mountain out of a molehill.

“Okay, then.” I took a deep breath. “Clean slate?”

“Clean slate.”

Well, at least that was one thing taken care of.

All that was left was approximately two thousand questions, number one being: how had I broken Ricky’s curse?

“How is it?” I asked, draping a hot, damp wash cloth over Ricky’s head as he slowly sipped broth in my kitchen. He didn’t seem to have the dexterity to hold a spoon yet. Fine motor function would probably return once we got the tremors to stop, and hopefully that would stop once his temperature was regulated, and his temperature would probably regulate once we got calories in him and?—

I cut myself off before I went to deep down that spiral. I needed to take it one step at a time, or I’d lose my place. That wouldn’t help anyone.

“Delicious,” Ricky said with a pleasant drawl, and I smiled. His voice had almost completely healed. Shifters certainly were something else. “You said there’s actual grass in this?”

“Lemongrass , ” I corrected with a chuckle. “It’s a tasty herb.”

“Huh. Haven’t ever heard of that before.”

“Ven here is a prolific gardener,” Leo said, giving me a dazzling smile.

“Ven?”

“That’s what I prefer to be called,” I said. Leo had probably used my proper name when he’d first mentioned me to Ricky.

“Gotcha,” he said before slurping at the broth again.

My cats had taken notice of our overnight guests sometime during the night since Leo had taken their spots in my bed. Nothing had happened between us, but where else would he have slept with Ricky taking up the couch?

Thankfully, my three were keeping their distance, allowing Ricky to enjoy his broth without interruption. Leo and I weren’t eating—it would be rude to eat the solid food right in front of a man who couldn’t. Maybe later in the day we could all dine together, but right now, I was intent on keeping an eye on him.

It was quite an ego boost that he liked my broth. After all, the man had been starved. I had a feeling that hunger was the one easy way to humble a shifter real fast. As far as I could tell, their bodies had much higher caloric needs than a human. I supposed it was a bit of a double-edged sword. They got a lot of fancy powers from all those disposable calories, but when famine came, their bodies didn’t handle it very well.

I wasn’t sure how I’d keep two shifters properly fed. The extra money I’d made working at the estate would vanish quickly if I had to buy enough protein to keep us all satiated. I wouldn’t worry about it now, but I’d have to deal with it soon. First, though, I wanted to make sure Ricky was all right.

“How’s it going in here? Have the cats voted to kick any of us out yet?” Leo asked as he came inside after unloading the compost into my garden. I hadn’t even thought about the motherlode of organic material we’d technically stolen until America had asked if we wanted a car that could get it back to my place. While I’d been in a pretty foul mood, even the grumpiest of grumps wouldn’t have me turning down what amounted to two-thousand-dollars’ worth of black gold soil. Man, the food I was going to make from that!

I was looking forward to getting my hands dirty again. It felt like an age since I’d tended to my garden, and now I was behind. The tomatoes needed to be planted outside, then two weeks later, all my gourds and melons, followed finally by my peppers.

“Not yet,” I answered. “But we’re hanging by a thread. They’re not opposed to a little catnip bribery.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

We shared a laugh, then the conversation went on rather organically. I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was. Ricky was essentially a complete stranger to me, but he and Leo went way back. I was about as close to a third wheel as I could be without it being a romantic situation, yet I didn’t feel that way. It was nice to watch them smile and reminisce, or occasionally brainstorm something neither of them could remember.

I found it curious the warlocks had chosen to make Leo’s punishment so much worse than everyone else’s when they’d intended him to stay in his wolf form forever, but it was probably a failsafe in case the spell somehow went wrong or was broken.

Clever bastards. Life was much easier when the bad guys lacked foresight.

“Have you found any others besides me?”

I had been anticipating the question, but it still felt like it came out of nowhere.

Leo and I both froze, the pleasant atmosphere fading as Ricky studied our faces.

“No,” Leo said slowly. “Just you. You’re the only one I could remember being taken.”

“Man, they really did a number on your memories, didn’t they?”

“Yeah, they wanted to make sure I was miserable and alone even if I somehow ever got my human form back.”

“Vindictive sons of bitches, ain’t they? With three of them down, I’m sure they’re cooking up some sort of revenge scheme. Hopefully, they won’t be able to trace this latest thing back to us. Might get harder as we find more of us, depending on what they did with the others.”

“Would you say that they’re a wiz at revenge?” I interjected, trying to lighten the mood.

Ricky gave me a quizzical sort of expression. “I don’t follow.”

Oh, boy. My face heated, and not in a good way. “Uh, you know, just trying to make a play on words. Wiz, wizard. You get it.”

It was such a little thing, and yet it made me want to sink into the floor. There was nothing like a failed joke to get me inside my head.

“Oh, I do get it, but they’re not wizards. They’re warlocks.”

I frowned. “Isn’t a warlock just a male witch?”

Ricky nearly choked on his soup, which made me feel embarrassed all over again. Surely that couldn’t be that ridiculous of a thing to assume.

He shook his head. “Not at all. Warlocks are any type of magic user that has made a specific pact with either a demon, an ancestral spirit, or some sort of celestial power from a different age, or even a different reality. A lot of them posture around like gods, but mostly they’re just metaphysical forces. Think of them kind of like magical sugar babies. They give their soul in a pact with whoever their patron is, and then they get powers untold on top of their natural abilities.”

“Oh,” I murmured, mind reeling a bit. “So, not just male witches.”

“No, definitely not just male witches.”

“Wish we knew which deities were fueling this whole clan,” Leo groused, crossing his arms over his broad chest. “Maybe it would get us some sort of advantage. Or maybe we could find other warlocks who are enemies of their patron. Wouldn’t that be convenient?”

Ricky’s spoon splashed down into his soup.

“Hey, are you all right?” Leo asked with concern.

The look of shock on Ricky’s face was pretty stark, and all the color had drained from his cheeks.

“I just remembered something,” he gasped.

“I thought you said they didn’t mess with your memory?”

“They didn’t. But it was something I saw as a wolf. When I was a mindless animal. I didn’t understand it then, but what you said brought it back.”

The atmosphere changed into something charged with anticipation and the tiniest flicker of hope.

Leo leaned forward. “What?”

“I know the demon they swore fealty to. I can’t believe I forgot it! When I was trapped as a wolf, one of Chadwicke’s brothers came in, fuming that a succubus and incubus pair had rebuffed him. He tried cursing them on his own, but their combined magic was just too strong. Chadwicke stopped torturing me long enough to say they would have to call upon their patron. It was just noises at the time, but now...” A jubilant grin spread across Ricky’s gaunt features. “Now, I know that patron’s name.”

“Well, what is it?” Leo asked, equally enthused. “Come on, out with it.”

“ Mammon, ” Ricky said, sitting back and seeming to relish both syllables. “Their patron is Mammon.”

“That’s brilliant.”

Leo jumped out of his seat and rounded the table, embracing his friend probably a bit harder than he should.

I didn’t interrupt. This was something wonderful to celebrate after they’d been separated for so long.

Something was niggling at the back of my mind, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

“Have you ever heard of that before?” Ricky asked.

“Not at all,” Leo replied. “But it’s an excellent jumping off point.”

“I...” I got up and began to pace.

“You okay, Ven?” Leo asked.

“I’m fine. Just thinking.” I walked a bit more, back and forth, back and forth as I chewed my lip. Then it finally hit me. Gasping, I rushed over to my laptop and turned it one, then pulled up one of the articles I’d found in my research. I swore I recognized that name.

Leo and Ricky came over to join me, Ricky moving much slower than Leo. I paid them no mind. No, I was completely locked in on scanning through the several articles I’d bookmarked.

It was on the third one that I found what I was looking for: a short exposé on a medical testing facility Chadwicke had been linked to. The company had conducted illegal research on animals. Considering what I knew about the brothers, I shuddered to think what was actually going on there.

“What is it, Ven?”

I pushed away from the computer and showed them the logo of the company. “MMI. Mammon Medical Industries. This is their company. I bet if the members of your pack are anywhere, some of them will be here.”

Man, if my aunt could only see me now. She always said my head was stuck in the clouds, and I never had enough of a grip on reality. But my grip was secure enough to remember a single mention of a company from something I read well over a week ago. Maybe I did have a knack for investigation after all.

Suddenly, I was swept up in a hug, Leo’s impressive biceps creating a nearly crushing force around me.

“Ven, you’re incredible ,” Leo practically crowed as he swung me around. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. There’s gotta be at least some of us there.”

“Maybe Atticus?” Ricky suggested hopefully.

Leo paused his twirling and set me down, sending a more sober look to his best friend. “Who’s Atticus?”

Several emotions flashed across Ricky’s face before he finally settled on a sad smile. “One of our best scouts. He and I used to go on a lot of missions together. He was with me when we originally found our first clues about the brothers.”

Leo closed his eyes, and it was almost like I could see his brain flooding with those memories. I hated how much pain it caused him. While I wanted him to have his old life back, to be able to recall those wonderful memories on a whim, I despised the journey.

“Yes, I remember now. If he’s there, we’ll find him.”

I appreciated their determination, and I hated having to rain on their parade, but I had to make sure that something was absolutely clear.

“Just so you know, I will have absolutely no part of this if either of you thinks it’s okay for it to turn into another massacre. I understand that war calls for certain things, and there aren’t likely to be children at a medical testing facility, but if we go in there and fight like we did at the compound, there’s no telling how many innocent subjects might die because of that. If anything, we have to be even more careful. I will not have the blood of prisoners who have been dreaming of escape on my hands. Am I clear?”

I was passive about a lot of things, and I let far too many people get away with talking to me however they wanted, but there were some things I wouldn’t compromise on. And while thinking about a medical facility possibly full of magical folks was horrifying, it was ten times worse to imagine any of them paying for our mistakes with their lives.

“This time will be completely different, I swear to you,” Leo said, taking my hand. “Without you, my pack wouldn’t have a hope of being here. And you’re right, the people there deserve to be saved, not to become casualties of our revenge. There’s no reason we can’t get justice while being wise about things.”

Relief washed through me, and I smiled. “Then, I’m all in. Let’s figure out everything we can about these bastards and see if we can hit them where it hurts.”

If there was one thing I had learned in my short experience dealing with a warlock, it was that speed was of the essence. We needed to hit them hard before they got a chance to counter and hit us right back.

Hopefully, we would be fast enough.