Page 37 of The Forsaken (Echoes from the Past #4)

TWENTY-NINE

London, England

Gentle fingers of morning light caressed Quinn’s face as she slowly came awake.

She’d slept fitfully and had strange dreams, but this morning she felt much calmer.

She’d cried for hours last night, soaking Gabe’s T-shirt with tears as she tried to wrap her mind around what she’d learned from Reverend Seaton.

She wasn’t sure what hurt more, discovering she had a twin sister out there somewhere, or realizing Sylvia had betrayed her so completely.

Sylvia had known from the start how desperately Quinn longed to find her family, and Quinn had mentioned more than once how excited she was to find out she had siblings.

She’d given Sylvia every opportunity to tell her there’d been another baby, a twin no less.

But Sylvia’s bland expression had never altered when Quinn spoke of siblings, and not a twinge of guilt had marred her features when she spoke to Quinn about the day she’d abandoned her.

Sylvia appeared to love her sons. Why couldn’t she have loved her daughters?

A child was such a gift, even if it wasn’t one’s own, Quinn reflected, as Emma’s piping voice drifted from the kitchen, and Gabe’s baritone answered her patiently.

“What am I getting for my birthday?” Emma asked for the hundredth time.

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” Gabe replied.

“But I want a puppy,” Emma persisted.

“I know, darling, but there’s no room for a puppy in this flat. Maybe we can get a puppy once we move. ”

“But I want a puppy now.”

“It wouldn’t be fair to the puppy to have nowhere to play,” Gabe reasoned with her. “Would you want the puppy to be sad?”

“No, I suppose not,” Emma conceded. “Can I have one when we move?”

“We will talk about it then.”

“But I don’t want to move to Berwick. I like it here,” Emma whined.

“I like it here too,” Gabe replied wistfully.

“So, why can’t we stay? Is it because of Grandma Phoebe?”

“Partially, yes. Now, what would you like for breakfast today? Toast okay?”

“I want a boiled egg and soldiers,” Emma replied. That was her favorite breakfast and she’d eat it every day if she could.

“All right. Boiled egg and soldiers coming right up.”

“I want Quinn to make it,” Emma replied defiantly.

“Are you saying that I can’t be trusted to boil an egg?” Gabe demanded, pretending to be outraged. Quinn could hear the smile in his voice.

“I’m saying that Quinn makes it better,” Emma replied, honest as only a four-year-old could be.

“Quinn is still sleeping. She’s tired, darling.”

“Why was Quinn crying, Daddy? Was she sad?”

“Just a little bit. It’s all right to feel sad from time to time.”

“What did Grandma Sylvia do? I heard you say her name. ”

“Grandma Sylvia likes to play games, and sometimes they are not fun,” Gabe answered.

“What sort of game is it?”

“The kind of game only adults can play. It’s a grown-up version of show and tell.”

“Did Grandma Sylvia show or tell?” Emma asked.

“Neither, which is why Quinn was upset. Grandma Sylvia didn’t follow the rules.”

“Rules are rules,” Emma intoned. “Miss Aubrey always says that when we don’t want to do something at school.”

“Rules are there for a reason,” Gabe said. “Here’s your egg and soldiers, and a glass of orange juice. Enjoy.”

“Can I have coffee?” Emma asked.

“What? Why would you want coffee?”

“Because I’ll be five soon and that’s what grown-ups drink.”

“I don’t think you’ll like it. It’s bitter.”

“So why do you like it?”

“Because I can’t have whisky in the morning,” Gabe joked, but it fell flat, given that his audience was slightly underage.

Quinn smiled. She loved listening to the two of them. Gabe and Emma’s relationship had come a long way in the past few months, and they had a dynamic all their own, one that she at times hated to disrupt. Quinn had her own relationship with Emma, and she hoped it wouldn’t change once the baby came.

Quinn finally got out of bed, pulled on her dressing gown, and padded into the kitchen. “Good morning, you two. Beautiful day. ”

“Are you done crying?” Emma asked.

“Absolutely. No more tears. See?” Quinn gave Emma a brilliant smile. “I have a very important assignment for you today.”

“What?”

Quinn took a stack of birthday invitations from the drawer and showed them to Emma. “I will put these in your backpack, and you will hand them out when you get to school. Can you do that?”

“But I can’t read,” Emma protested. “How will I know whose invitation is whose?”

“All the invitations are exactly the same, so it doesn’t matter who gets which envelope. Are you up to the task, Miss Russell?”

“Yes!”

“Excellent. Now, finish your breakfast and go get dressed. Your clothes are on the chair. I just need to speak to Daddy for a moment.”

“Promise you won’t cry?” Emma asked as she slid off her chair.

“Promise.”

“How are you? Really?” Gabe asked as he wrapped Quinn in his arms and gave her a lingering kiss.

“I’m all right. Really.”

“Quinn, about Sylvia…”

Quinn held up her hand. “Nothing to worry about.”

“Why don’t I believe you?”

“Well, you should. I’ve had a moment of perfect clarity,” she announced, still smiling .

“I’m almost afraid to ask.”

Quinn took a seat at the table and reached for one of Emma’s leftover strips of toast. “Any chance of a cup of tea?”

“Of course.” Gabe poured her a cup of tea and added a splash of milk.

She could see the tension in his shoulders and the worried look in his eyes, and her heart turned over.

She was so blessed to have a husband who loved her so much and worried about her well-being.

Gabe was the only person, besides her parents, whom she’d trust with her life, and the realization overwhelmed her with gratitude.

‘I love you,” Quinn said simply.

“And I love you, but I’m still waiting to hear about this earth-shattering revelation,” Gabe replied with a warm smile.

“When I asked Sylvia why she didn’t want me, she said she gave me away because she couldn’t love me,” Quinn explained.

“I was devastated by her answer, but also grateful for her honesty. It’d have made it worse if she’d said she wanted me desperately but couldn’t find a way to make it work.

I’d have felt like I missed out on a lifetime with my mother. ”

“Yes, I can see that. But how is this relevant?”

“What I realized just now is that the sentiment is not one-sided. I don’t want Sylvia because I can’t love her.

You were absolutely right about her, Gabe.

I built up my birth mother in my mind, imagining her to be this perfect woman, but in truth, Sylvia is someone I’d never choose to know had she not given birth to me.

I don’t trust her, and let’s be brutally honest here, I don’t even like her.

Just because I now know her doesn’t mean I have to maintain a relationship with her or allow her to be a part of my life. ”

“So, what are you saying? Are you severing ties with her?”

Quinn shook her head. “No, not yet. I will speak to her about what I’ve learned, and if what the Reverend Seaton said is true, I will look for my sister.

But I will no longer allow Sylvia to hurt me, nor will I permit her the chance to be my mother, or a grandmother to my children.

She’s lied to me once too often. Sylvia Wyatt can just be someone I know. Period.”

“That’s quite a turnaround from yesterday,” Gabe said, watching Quinn. “What brought this on?”

“Perhaps I’m starting to think more like a mother and a wife and less like a single woman.

Sylvia is not a priority for me any longer—you and the children are.

” Quinn laid a hand on her belly, smiling as it shifted beneath her hand.

“I will not do anything to endanger this baby, or myself. I will approach this new hurdle like a work project rather than a personal quest.”

“Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?” Gabe joked. “I’m glad to hear you see sense. That is the best possible attitude I could have hoped for. Will it last?” he asked carefully.

“I think so.”

“What are you not telling me?” Gabe asked as he took a seat across from Quinn and sipped his coffee.

“I want it to be a coincidence, Gabe. I don’t want that baby to be my sister.”

“Really?”

“Gabe, you know how badly I wanted to know my parents and my siblings, but so far, meeting them has been a great disappointment. Sylvia is as wily as a fox. Seth is a good man, but on some level, he’ll always be a stranger to me, and my brothers have been a revelation, to say the least. If I truly have a twin sister, God only knows what she’s like.

Just because we shared a womb doesn’t mean we have anything in common or will even like each other. ”

“You’re afraid to get your hopes up. ”

“I suppose you could say that. Finding my twin, if that’s who she is, would really prove to be an interesting case study for nature versus nurture. Would we be similar because of our genetics, or would we be polar opposites because we grew up in completely different families and circumstances?”

“There’s only one way to find the answer to that question, and I think that perhaps you should wait until after baby Russell is born to start looking for it.”

Quinn nodded. “I think you’re right, but in the meantime, I can start doing the legwork, and the first port of call is Sylvia.”

“I’m coming with you,” Gabe said.

“Gabe, I love that you want to protect me, but this is something I must do on my own. I promise you I will remain cool, calm, and detached. Like I said, I’m done allowing Sylvia to hurt me.”

“All right. But ring me, should you need moral support.”

“You know I will.”