Page 23 of The Disasters of Dating (Love Connections #6)

POPPY

Pisces, you’re in the flow today and there’s little reason for you to overexert yourself.

With very little effort, you’ll have the good fortune of enjoying this day.

But keep in mind that if you decide to accomplish something, you’ll be extremely successful.

You’re totally in sync with today’s energy.

I wake up, still smiling from the night before. Not only did I have an injury-free dinner with Keaton, but I had a fun text conversation with Lincoln. It was a pleasant night all around. And now I have today off work. I am in the flow.

I flop back onto my pillow and stare up at the ceiling. I wonder what Keaton’s doing today? Likely working. And I shouldn’t be wondering anyhow. He’s a tourist. He’s off limits.

My brow creases. But is he really?—my brain challenges me. He lives here four days out of every week. He spends more time in Utah than in New Hampshire. So, does the rule still apply to him?

I shake my head. He lives in a hotel. Hotel equals tourist.

I give a firm nod as if that seals the deal and makes it law. But I’m still waffling. My stomach growls, and I realize I need breakfast. Maybe food will add clarification? Man, I wish we had waffles.

I swing out of bed and grab my phone. Maybe my cousins can help me figure it out. But what if what they tell me means Keaton isn’t a tourist? Do I want him to stay a tourist? It’s definitely safer…for me. I open the cousin chat.

What would you classify as a tourist?

Or rather what qualifies someone as a tourist?

I set my phone on the counter and open the fridge. Pulling out a yogurt, I set it on the counter when my phone vibrates, and a message comes in from Chloe.

Chloe-Bear

Non-local. Wearing a backpack around. Lost looking.

Chloe-Bear

Thinks your city is really cool when you know it’s kinda boring.

I nod. So far, so good. Keaton totally fits into that definition.

Right? I mean, he doesn’t look lost, per se.

And he hasn’t said that he thinks Salt Lake is cool—which I totally agree with.

Salt Lake is cool. Maybe I’m the one who’s the tourist. But I guess if one of us is the tourist, my rule still applies?

Good definition…he wears a backpack sometimes.

Dani answers just as I finish typing.

Dani

Are we assuming a tourist is a bad thing? Because Mason was definitely a fan of this tourist…

I kind of miss single and cynical Dani…

Not bad. I just need to define it so I know the parameters for my rules.

My rule says I can’t date tourists…but if we’re just friends, we should be able to hang out, right? And didn’t we establish last night that we are friends?

Lucy’s text comes in.

Berries

Someone who comes to the area for the sole purpose of seeing the city. I like the backpack requirement. Haha. Or a fanny pack.

I grin. I can’t picture Keaton in a fanny pack. I can picture him in a lot of things…swim trunks or a smedium t-shirt. But not a fanny pack.

Berries

Hey, does this mean I’m no longer a tourist when I visit Canada? Since my sole purpose is a man, not a city? I feel like I should claim dual citizenship based on that alone.

You do realize we are making up these qualifications for our own purposes, right? Like, this isn’t official to any state or country…

Berries

Too late. Did you guys know I’m a dual citizen in Canada?

Chloe-Bear

Nice work, Lucy, locking down dual citizenship.

And just like that, we’ve squirreled off my problem and onto something else. And there’s no sense trying to pull it back. They will stay off subject, out of principle.

Awe, Lucy. Your kids can be bilingual!

So far, the only thing making Keaton a tourist is the backpack. And he didn’t bring that to dinner last night. So…

Then Avery chimes in. I’m kind of surprised to hear from her.

As the day that was supposed to be her wedding gets closer, she seems to get more withdrawn.

Not that I blame her. While I would never say it to her, she is so much better off.

Eric, her ex, is a complete tool and totally took advantage of her.

(Not in that way. In more of a mental and emotional way.) She should have kicked him to the curb years ago.

Avery

They speak English in that part of Canada, Pops…

Hence the laughing emoji. Sheesh, sometimes I think you all think I’m stupid.

I reread it and then delete it. Not because I don’t think it’s true. But because I don’t want Avery to think I’m calling her out. After all, I think they all think I’m dumb. Not just Avery.

But do they???

That seems a safer text.

I pull up the text thread between Keaton and me. Should I text him or call him?

Are we close enough ‘friends’ for phone calls? What would even be the rules there? Man, when did so many rules become a part of my life?

I push aside my doubt and press the call button on Keaton’s contact info. It rings twice and then goes to voicemail. “Hey, this is Keaton. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”

Hmm. I geared myself up for nothing. Should I leave a message?

His phone beeps at me. I need to decide now or hang up.

“Hey, Keaton. It’s Poppy. I was wondering what you’re up to today.

I mean, I’m sure you’re at work. I mean, that’s why you’re here in Utah.

Not that you don’t know why you’re here.

That’s not what I meant. Because if you didn’t know, that would be weird.

And not very effective for your work.” Oh my heck!

What am I saying? He’s going to think I’m a complete idiot.

“Anyway, you’re probably busy, but if you want to go to dinner or something…

as friends. I mean, I’m not thinking it’s a date.

” I slap my hand over my eyes. Holy cow, this is a complete train wreck, and I can’t seem to disentangle myself from it.

I keep rambling more awful things. “Anyway, if this message hasn’t made you decide to lose my number, then give me a call back and we can plan something.

And it doesn’t have to be for tonight. It could be a different night.

Or lunch. I’m good with lunch, too.” I close my eyes, hoping that when I open them, this will all have been a bad dream.

But I’m not so lucky. Maybe my horoscope was wrong and I do need to put forth a bit of effort.

“Okay, yeah. Call me if you want to. Bye.” I press the disconnect button and drop my head onto the counter. That could not have gone worse.

With a sigh, I pull up Paisleigh’s number.

Hey, what are you doing today?

Paisleigh

Nothing. What are you doing?

Cleaning my bathroom. I need to clean out my closet, too, but I’m not feeling it today. Do you want to do something?

Paisleigh

Sure. What are you thinking?

Want to go on a hike?

Paisleigh

Sure…why???

What do you mean why? I like to hike as much as the next guy.

Paisleigh

But do you?

Yes.

I sigh. Why isn’t she working with me here? I want to get out and do something. I have a lot of energy that I need to do something with.

Paisleigh

Okay. When do you want to go?

I want to go now. But by the time we drive anywhere, it will just be getting hot.

What about tonight? Then it will be cooler.

Paisleigh

Okay. What time?

You don’t text excited…

Paisleigh

Oh, I’m so excited…

Liar.

I’ll pick you up at 7. I’ll even bring your favorite snack…

Paisleigh

Which one????

Fruit strips.

Paisleigh

Do you have grape and peach?

I can.

Paisleigh

*excitement piqued.

I’ll see you at 7. Don’t forget sunscreen. It might be evening, but you can still get sunburned.

Paisleigh

Yes, Mom.

I grab a spoon from the drawer and pull the top off my yogurt. Paisleigh may not want to go now, but we’ll have a blast. We always do. Not that we hike a lot. Just that we have fun in whatever we do. Because we’re us. We’re fun people.

My phone rings and I shove the spoonful of yogurt into my mouth as I answer it—not bothering to look at the name on the screen.

“Yuh not bakk-ing ow’ on me, right?” I say around the yogurt in my mouth that’s now dotting my phone screen. I know, eeww. I swallow the last of it. “You only accepted like two seconds ago.” I put my hand on my hip, as if she can see me.

“I had no intention of backing out,” a decidedly male voice says on the other end.

Crap. This isn’t Paisleigh. After Grandma Alice ambushed me last week, I’d vowed not to answer calls without looking first. How fast we forget.

I glance at the screen and see my suspicions are correct. My stomach does a little cha-cha. It’s Keaton.

“Oh, hey, Keaton. Sorry, I thought you were my friend, Paisleigh.” I run a hand down the front of my pajamas, even though he can’t see me. “Sorry if I interrupted a meeting or something.”

Oh my heck. Could I act like a bigger goober ?

“No problem at all. I just got to the office, so no meetings yet.”

I glance at the clock and realize it’s only 7:45. It was probably after 7 when I texted him. Which makes my rambling call even more embarrassing.

He sighs, but I can hear the smile in it. “I enjoyed listening to your message.” Is it a mocking smile or a happy smile?

“Yeah, I’m sure you did,” I say wryly.

“No, it was great. I’ll take a ramble any day of the week if it means I get to hear your voice first thing in the morning.”

My whole body warms. Does that mean he liked it? It sounds like he did. But maybe he’s just being nice?

“So…” he trails off.

“So…” I repeat.

“Did you want to get together today?” There’s a tentative tone to his voice.

Dang it! Why did I arrange to go hiking with Paisleigh without waiting to hear back from him? “Sure. Unless you’re too busy. You don’t have to feel obligated.”

“Why would I feel obligated?” He pauses. “But from the sounds of it, you already made plans?”

“No,” I blurt out. “That was for something else.” I lie. It’s not like Paisleigh wanted to go hiking anyway. I’ll get her fruit strips and run them over before I meet Keaton.

“Oh, good. Then you’re available this evening?”

I nod. “Yeah. Totally. What do you want to do?”

He’s quiet for a second. “I don’t know. What is there to do around here?”

Before I realize what I’m saying, I blurt out. “You want to go on a hike?” What is it with me and hiking today? I mean, I like the outdoors as much as the next guy. But I’m not what you would call a ‘hiker.’

“Oh, yeah. I’d love to. Are there any hikes nearby?” He actually sounds excited. Although compared to Paisleigh, I think anything would sound excited. Does that mean he’s a hiker? I grimace. I hadn’t counted on that one.

“Yeah, there are some pretty ones. Are you okay with an easier one? Or do you want something more challenging?”

“I’m fine either way.”

As one who is not a ‘hiker,’ I’m not super familiar with all the places to hike in the Salt Lake area.

Guess me and the Googles will be spending some quality time together today.

“Okay.” I pause, wondering if I should mention my thought.

“What if I make us a picnic and we eat there?” A picnic, Poppy?

Do I even have a proper basket? I think with all the misplaced snootiness of Mrs. Bennett from Pride and Prejudice.

I frown. I think a backpack is better than a basket in this case.

I’m not going to Red Riding Hood it for a hike.

I grin at the thought of Dani, Sadie, and Avery cringing at my mixed metaphors.

Or are they similes? Maybe they are personifications? I don’t remember.

“Oh, great idea. Can I bring anything?” he asks.

“Nope. I’ll take care of everything. What time do you get off work?” I totally forgot that he doesn’t have a car here. That means I should probably go pick him up.

“I can have things wrapped up by 5. Or is that too late?”

“Nope,” I say again. It appears to be the word of the day for me. “I’ll pick you up at 5. Can you text me your address?”

“Uh,” he waffles. Is he changing his mind about the whole thing? Maybe he’d rather go bowling? Or to dinner? Or maybe he’s realized I’m a complete doofus. “Can you pick me up at my hotel? I don’t think I want to hike in my suit.”

I close my eyes. Duh, Pops. “Oh, yeah. I hadn’t thought about that. So, what time should I come?”

“How about 5:45? Does that give us enough time?”

“I think so. I’ll pick a hike that’s not too long and not too far away.” Besides, it’s still light until well after 9:00. We’ll have plenty of time.

“Great,” he says. “Then I’ll see you at 5:45?”

“Yep.” I take a deep breath.

“Okay, I’d better let you go. My meeting is about to start.”

“Have a good day,” I say lamely.

“You, too.”

I hurry and pull up Paisleigh’s name.

NM. You’re off the hook.

Paisleigh

***

You don’t have to go hiking with me anymore. I found someone else.

Paisleigh

What? You’re replacing me? With who???

Airport guy.

Paisleigh

You threw me over for a guy? The airport guy? But he’s a tourist.

Ugh. She really knows how to hit where it hurts.

We’re just friends. So I’m not breaking my rule.

Paisleigh

I don’t need your crap, Pais. Besides, I thought you’d be happy that you didn’t have to go.

Paisleigh

But now I’m in the mood for fruit strips…

I’ll bring some over before I go.

Paisleigh

Have fun on your hike!!!