Page 31

T HIRTY C AMILLE

I barely sleep the first night Xander is gone, and when I haul myself out of bed in the morning, there’s a check-in text from Harper on his phone.

How are things? I won’t be able to get there today. Rachel recruited me to teach a novice class, and if I turn that down it’ll look suspicious.

Despite the pit in my stomach, I smile. Harper has always impressed the organization, and it appears they’re finally acknowledging it. Of course that’ll be shot to hell—quite literally—if she joins Xander’s council and the hunters discover it, but I’m not about to bring that up. Knowing Harper, she’s already stewing about it.

That’s great, Harper! Please don’t worry. Xander and his council left for the final trial, so I’ll be distracting myself until they get back. I need to call my dad, but thinking about that is really a treat for my anxiety.

Oh babe, I’m sorry. I wish I could do that for you. I’ll be there soon. Hugs!

Thanks. Right back at you.

I pace the length of Xander’s room for a while, my bare feet padding across the hardwood until I work up the nerve to call my dad. Harper sent the number last night, so all I have to do is tap on it and wait for the call to connect.

In the middle of the room, I stop moving, take a deep breath, and initiate the call.

He answers on the second ring. “Scott Morgan.”

“Hey, Dad, it’s me.”

“Camille? Your name didn’t come up.”

“Um, yeah.” I panic briefly then blurt, “I kinda lost my phone. It’s probably somewhere at Ballard.”

“Not to worry, kiddo. We can track it. Are you heading there with Noah this morning?”

I wince inwardly, biting the inside of my cheek. “No. I’m actually out of town for a while. I’ve really been missing Harper, and she’s going through some things too, so I just need to be with her right now.”

“What about your training?” he asks, his voice laced with concern.

“I’ll keep up with it, don’t worry.”

There’s a stretch of silence, then, “Is there something going on?”

“No,” I lie too easily. “Everything is fine. I’ll let you know when I’m back in the city and we can have dinner, okay? I love you.”

“I love you too. You know where I am if you need anything.”

“Thanks, Dad. I’ll see you soon.”

I end the call before I dig myself into a bigger hole of lies. Tossing the phone on the bed, I exhale a heavy sigh and head into the ensuite bathroom to take a shower.

After standing under the spray of water until it loses its warmth, I get out and wrap myself in a plush towel. I take my time drying off and moisturizing, enjoying the high-end products in Xander’s bathroom I’d venture a guess Blake purchased.

Wrapping myself in a robe off the back of the door, I return to the room I woke in yesterday and scour the fully stocked closet for something to wear. I dress for comfort in a light gray crewneck sweater and sweatpant set, then twist my hair into two French braids before venturing downstairs to the kitchen.

“Good morning,” Gio greets with a warm smile from where he sits at the kitchen island counter, sipping from a mug.

“Morning,” I offer with an awkward wave.

“How are you doing? Can I make you something for breakfast?”

“I’m fine,” I say automatically.

“Coffee?”

I shake my head, walking to the opposite side of the counter and leaning against it. “Not a huge fan.”

“Fair enough.” He finishes his coffee, setting the mug down before continuing, “Well, if you’re not too busy today, you should hang out with me. I plan to get wine drunk and bake a bunch of cookies.”

I nearly choke on a laugh.

How is this guy a demon?

“Are you serious?”

“Very much so. I’m leaning toward a classic chocolate chip but may also try a dark chocolate and salted caramel recipe I found last night. Interested in joining me?”

“Yeah, kind of,” I admit with a hint of a smile.

Gio beams. “Excellent. Now, are you a red, white, or rosé gal?”

“Hmm, usually white.”

His grin widens. “Perfect. I just got a few bottles from Niagara that you’re going to adore.”

“You know a lot about wine?” Xander mentioned him attending culinary school, so it doesn’t feel like a stretch.

“I like to think so. I worked at a hotel in Toronto for a number of years and was known in the kitchen as the wine guy.”

“That’s really cool,” I tell him, glancing around the professional grade kitchen. “I’m ready to dive into a sugar coma whenever you are.”

We spend the rest of the day sipping wine and eating cookie dough until my stomach aches. While I still worry about Xander and Harper and my parents somehow finding out where I am, the distraction of hanging out with Gio has been really nice.

I call it a night early after a delicious dinner of grilled cheese and tomato soup—all made from scratch by Gio—and head to bed with a light buzz that thankfully helps lull me to sleep faster than my thoughts can catch up.

The next morning, I wake only mildly hungover from the excessive amount of wine I consumed yesterday. After a splash of cold water on my face, I change into a workout set and wander my way to the gym.

Starting my usual warm up, I can’t help but think of Noah. A quick glance at the clock tells me he’s on his way to Ballard for class, and there’s a pang of something in my stomach, pushing against the pit that already exists there.

I miss Noah .

As much as he annoys me and complicates things, he’s also a significant source of comfort and assurance. He believed in me even when I didn’t. He fought for me to retake my test, and I can still clearly see the pride shining in his eyes when I passed it.

I exhale an uneven breath, turning off the treadmill and walking over to the wall of free weights. I focus on my arms, going through several sets of workouts Noah taught me until they feel like noodles. Then I utilize the squat rack to the point my legs are shaking when I reset the bar after my last rep.

Downing my water bottle on my way to the stairs, my stomach grumbles, and I go in search of the leftover cookies from yesterday’s baking marathon. Because yum .

It’s been three days since Xander left for the final trial. I understand time passes differently in hell, but the longer he’s gone, the higher my anxiety creeps.

Gio continues to cook for me and makes conversation that makes me feel almost normal, but the reason I’m here having these conversations always exists in the back of my mind, same with the nagging concern about what’s going to happen if Xander doesn’t pass the trial—or if he does.

I’m sitting at the dining room table across from Gio trying to convince myself to pick up my fork and eat despite the swirling unease in my stomach making me feel queasy. He put in the effort to make a perfectly fluffy quiche with a flaky, buttery crust, and I feel bad I’m just pushing bits of it around my plate.

“I’m sure they’ll be back soon,” he says in a gentle voice.

Glancing up, I meet his friendly gaze. “Yeah.” I take a small sip of my water. “Will you know when it happens? Like how all the demons felt when the queen died?”

He considers it for a moment before shaking his head. “I don’t think so. The trials are a technicality the royal guard implemented. We felt when the previous monarch died because that was the change in power. Though if for some reason Xander wasn’t taking the throne, I suppose we might feel that.” He offers a small smile. “This hasn’t happened in quite some time. The change in power, I mean. And it’s never happened like this before.” He chuckles softly. “Of course Xander had to go and do something unprecedented so none of us can figure out what the hell is going to happen next.” Gio’s tone is fond, but I get the underlying concern in his words.

“You’ve known him for a while then?”

“We go way back.”

I chew the inside of my cheek, running my finger through the condensation on my water glass. “Do you think taking the throne will change him? I know he lost his soul when he killed Lucia, but there’s still part of him that’s, I don’t know…”

“Human?” He offers.

My heart is still human and it remains yours.

My cheeks flush, and I give a halfhearted shrug. Gio’s nice, but I’m not about to sit here and talk about my relationship with Xander with him.

Gio sighs. “Xander has always toed the line in that regard.”

“What line would that be?”

“Good and evil,” he says simply. “He’s struggled with humanity for as long as I’ve known him. I thought the absence of a soul would eliminate that but it seems not.”

I’m not sure what I was expecting him to say but it wasn’t that. “Right,” I mumble. Instead of pretending like I’m going to eat, I push my plate away and stand. “Thanks for breakfast.”

His eyes flick from my plate to my face, and he smiles. “Of course. Can I make you something else?”

My stomach drops, and I rush to say, “Oh no, that’s okay.” I feel bad for leaving my food untouched. “Sorry, I’m just not really hungry right now.” I push my chair in, picking up my plate to take it to the kitchen. “I’ll, um, see you later.”

I retreat to the bedroom, slipping into the en suite bathroom and turning the shower as hot as it’ll go before undressing and getting under the waterfall shower head.

Steam fills the room with a hazy warmth as I use too much of the stupid expensive shampoo, conditioner, and body wash until my hair and skin smell and feel incredible.

It’s only once the water gets cooler that I shut off the shower and get out. Exhaling a long breath, I wrap a towel around my hair and another around my body. I wipe the fog off the mirror and lean against the vanity, my head swimming from the heat.

I take my time dressing in comfy light gray joggers and a black crewneck sweater, combing my hair and applying body lotion, because self-care—I may be spiraling a little, but at least my skin is soft.

I pass the afternoon with an extended nap and a call to Harper, who reassures me she’ll be here as soon as she can.

When my stomach grumbles around dinner time, I figure I should head downstairs and try to eat something.

I walk out to the hallway and nearly collide with someone just outside the door. Reeling back, my gaze shoots up to meet the most striking eyes I’ve ever seen.

“Um, hi,” I stutter, taking in the rest of her otherworldly stunning appearance. She’s tall and well-toned from what I can see. Her hair is long and shiny, falling in loose waves past her breasts, accentuated by the vest style top she’s wearing, paired with high waisted dress pants and impressive heels.

The stranger looks me over, her gaze calculating. “You must be Xander’s little human houseguest. Caitlin, right?”

I arch a brow, pulse still racing. “Camille,” I correct. “And you are?”

“Francesca,” she says. “Council member and Xander’s oldest friend.”

That sparks something in me I choose to ignore. “I thought Blake was his oldest friend.”

Francesca chuckles. “Yes, well, Blake has never slept with him, so I think I still win.”

Heat flares in my cheeks, and whatever response I had dies on my lips.

She props her hand on her hip. “Xander didn’t tell you about me?”

I shake my head without saying anything. I’d give anything to go back in time and not leave the bedroom. Running into an ex-lover of Xander’s is pretty high on my list of things I’d be thrilled to avoid—I think outnumbered only by going to hell .

“Ouch. I guess I wouldn’t either. We were betrothed, after all.”

My eyes widen as my stomach sinks. “What?”

She waves away my surprise as if it’s a ridiculous reaction. “It was a long time ago.”

“Why didn’t you marry him?”

She purses her red stained lips. “Some things just aren’t meant to be.”

“Did you love him?”

Francesca laughs. “Love? It had nothing to do with love.”

I frown, my brows tugging closer. “That sounds incredibly lonely.”

She arches a perfectly shaped brow at me. “Do you love him?”

My heart pounds in my chest, as if it’s attempting to break free of my rib cage. “I…um…” I sigh, and I have no idea why, but I tell her, “As much as I’ve tried to shake him, I just can’t. He’s ingrained in my soul. I know he’s changed since Lucia—he didn’t have a choice—but I still see flashes of the Xander I believe loves me too, which makes me want to fight for him. So I will.”

Francesca rolls her eyes. “Ugh. Such fluffy human emotions.” She straightens, holding my gaze. “I grew up with Xander in hell. My loyalty to him is undying.”

I’m not sure how I’m supposed to respond to that. This woman scares the shit out of me, so the chance of saying the wrong thing has me keeping my mouth shut.

“You look confused,” she observes. “Does Xander not share anything with you?”

“He does,” I say in a short tone.

Her lips twitch. “Right, well, Marrick is my father. I’m sticking with Xander because I give a shit about him, but also because the man who raised me is the only creature in this world—or the underworld—that scares me.” Her gaze darkens, and I’m not prepared to see the flash of fear there. “He wants to rule, to take charge of the demons by creating his own.”

I blink, my stomach plummeting. Xander told me what Marrick was up to, but I had no idea his daughter was part of Xander’s council—or that they were supposed to be married. Instead of seeking more information that’s only going to make my head explode, I say, “Is Xander back?”

Francesca inclines her head in a subtle nod, making the butterflies in my stomach flutter at the thought of seeing him.

I swallow hard. “Is he…I mean, did he—”

“Ask him yourself,” she says a moment before the hair on the back of my neck sticks up and my pulse climbs.

I know he’s standing there before I move a muscle. I feel him to my very core, and being so physically aware of someone is jarring.

Inhaling slowly, I turn on my heel and face him. The air releases from my lungs in a vicious whoosh , and my feet become blocks of cement as I stare at his disheveled appearance. But it’s the darkness in his eyes that sends a chill all the way to my bones. His posture is rigid and his all-black attire is tattered and stained.

My world narrows on him as he approaches, stopping a few feet away. Emotion clogs my throat, my muscles trembling as I stand before him. I swallow hard. “You’re here,” is all I can find to say.

He cocks his head to the side, his eyes roaming my face. “Appears so.”

“Does that mean you passed the final trial?” My voice is low, and I can’t stop my hands from shaking at my sides. I’m terrified of the answer but I have to know.

Xander nods.

A fraction of the pressure in my lungs releases. At least he won’t be forced to patrol the darkest parts of hell.

But what will he have to do?

“Well, um, congratulations, I guess?” I offer, at a loss for anything else to come up with.

His lips twitch briefly. A ghost of a smile.

Something feels off. He’s standing right in front of me, but this person seems like a stranger. Cold and detached. I’ve never been to hell, but I didn’t think a visit to where Xander grew up would do this to him.

What happened there? What did he have to do to pass the trial?

I take a tentative step closer, searching his eyes for something, anything I recognize. I come up empty, and my chest tightens once more.

“You’re probably exhausted,” I murmur. “I’ll leave you to get cleaned up and rest.”

Before I make it a full step backward, Xander snags my wrist and pulls me in, quickly gripping my chin and capturing my mouth with his. Between one moment and the next, he has me pressed against the wall, his free hand wrapping around my hip as his lips devour mine.

I’m kissing him back before I even realize what’s happening, but when my head catches up to my heart, everything in me screams to stop this. It’s primal and possessive and devoid of any semblance of care.

This isn’t the Xander I fell in love with—it’s the king of hell.

I shove hard against his chest until he concedes a step. “What are you doing?” I breathe, my lips tingling.

He chuckles softly, rubbing his thumb over his bottom lip. “I thought it was clear. My mistake.”

Shaking my head, I say, “I don’t know what happened while you were gone but I’m here to listen if you want to talk about it.” Come back to me, I want to say, but the words get stuck in my throat.

Xander shrugs. “There’s nothing to say. The trials were a formality and now they’re done.”

“Okay, fine. So why are you acting like—”

“Like what, Camille?” he cuts in with a jagged tone.

“Like everything I hate about you,” I snap.

“Have you considered that perhaps this is who I truly am?”

My brows lift and I can feel my heart beating in my throat. “Do you hear yourself?”

“I think it’s you who isn’t hearing me. I’m simply showing you who I am. I haven’t pretended to be anyone else in some time, and I won’t start now just to make you feel better about who you’re fucking.”

His words are as sharp and violent as a slap to the face. I stare at him, incredulous silence hanging between us. My heartbeat thunder crashes in my chest and my lungs struggle to fill with even breaths. Because how could I be so fucking wrong about Xander, again ?

All of a sudden, we’re back where we started. The whiplash of betrayal burns, making tears prick my eyes, and I quickly blink them away. The urge to disappear from this encounter is strong, but I swallow the emotion clogging my throat and straighten my back.

“You’re a coward,” I say in a low voice, meeting his darkening gaze. “You can’t handle a little trip to the underworld without suppressing your humanity?” I shake my head. “I thought you were stronger than that. My mistake .” I throw his words back at him and then I walk away, willing myself not to shed a tear until I’m behind closed doors.