Page 39 of The Crown of the Last Fae Queen (The Heartless and the Wicked #4)

“I will find a way,” he whispered, his thumb grazing her cheek slowly. “I will resist them, Kolfinna. I will never allow the king and Hilda, and everyone who thinks like them, to take you away from me.”

“But let’s say the humans defeat the fae, what do you think will happen to me?

Do you really think the king will want to keep me alive?

That the humans wouldn’t decide to eradicate the fae forever?

” She intertwined her hands together to keep from digging her fingers into her palms. “It’s not just my fate that I care about.

I don’t want my people to be persecuted. ”

Blár rubbed her lower back slowly, his jaw set. “I understand. I, too, want a world where both of our races can live together in peace. Without oppression.”

What could they even do? If the humans won, they would likely kill every fae and elf they could. They had already been doing it for centuries—why would it be any different now? Especially when the fae posed a greater threat than ever before?

If the fae won, they would enslave the humans, and would rule above them like they had done all those centuries ago, before King Harald defeated Queen Aesileif’s armies.

“I don’t know which side will be more just,” Blár said after their silence stretched thin. “I don’t have high hopes for either, if I’m being honest. But I will side with the humans.”

Kolfinna stared at him a moment longer, before she couldn’t anymore. She peered down at her hands. Her heart thundered in her chest.

“There are rumors that Commander Bernsten is dead,” he said.

She whipped her head up at that, eyes widening. Commander Bernsten, the commander-in-chief of the entire military? Dead ?

“They say one of the fae generals killed him a week or two ago. It’s the reason why the military has been slow to react, to fight.

People are scrambling for his empty position.

The king is taking this as a chance to grasp total control.

Hilda is trying to take over instead. And …

” Blár pursed his lips, as if he was debating whether or not to say something.

“What?” Kolfinna shifted on his lap so she could better pin him with a grim look. “What is it Blár?”

“I’m trying to take that position, too.”

She could imagine it. Blár, at the helm of the military, leading the human armies into battle. He would fit it more than Hilda ever could. She would be tyrannical. A monster.

“If I have that kind of power, I can protect you,” he said at last, grasping her face with his rough hands. He stared at her, a glimmer of hope in his forlorn expression. “If I am able to claim power, then we can mold our own future, Kolfinna.”

She thought about the conversation she had with Astrid, and how the mating bond, once consummated, made their power grow. But she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. That they both could grow more powerful if they slept together. Her shyness held her tongue.

“If it’s you, I know you can do it.” She absentmindedly touched the scales of his uniform, her fingers dancing over the smooth surface. It reminded her of dreki scales, dark and glossy. “But how will you do it?”

“The fae general—the tall male one—overtook the military headquarters. His army is still there, battling the humans. If I can defeat him and reclaim the headquarters, I can take over the military. Hilda is trying to do the same, but she knows she is no match for him at her old age, so she is trying more devious methods to take power.” He spoke rapidly, as if he needed the words out in the open to make them more real.

“In order for it to work, we need their plans. I’m not arrogant enough to think I can march in there and defeat him and all his armies as I am now.

Unlike Hilda, who has men under her, I have no one.

But I’m stronger than her, so I can possibly defeat him if it’s a one-on-one match, or if …

if I can somehow storm the headquarters.

If I have the upper hand … then we have a chance, Kolfinna. ”

He must have been talking about Agnarr; the thought of Blár defeating him sent a shudder down her spine. But there was also something else there—guilt.

She thought of the way he had been at dinner, his easy smile, the way he had held Freyja’s hand. He was about to be a father …

She shook her head. She couldn’t think like that. This was war.

“I understand. But you and Gunnar need to hurry if you want to find something. I don’t know when Vidar plans to go to the capital, but it will likely be soon. He wants me to free the queen. I think … she might be there.”

“One week. Two, tops.” He nodded, as if he had already suspected that. “If we can’t find anything, we will take you and escape. I’m still not sure on all the details of the escape plan, but we’ll do it in the middle of the night. It’s already in our favor that two of the generals are leaving soon.”

Freyja and Agnarr would be going back to their respective military posts. They had only come here to help with her training. Though they didn’t do much. Unless there was another reason they had returned? She wasn’t sure.

“Just hang tight for another week,” Blár said.

“There has to be something I can do,” she whispered, searching his face for an answer. “I can’t just sit here and wait for you to do all of this on your own. It’s dangerous. If Rakel or Vidar see your face, they’ll recognize you.”

“I’m aware.” A wry smile tugged on his lips as he touched the bottom of his cloth mask.

“This is a prime opportunity for you to grow stronger, Kolfinna. Nobody else can teach you how to fully use your powers other than the people here. Use that to your advantage and learn as much as you can, because we’ll use that against them. ”

She didn’t like that idea. While he was risking his life sneaking around this fortress, she was supposed to continue to train and wait for him to rescue her? It sounded dangerous on his part, and passive on hers.

“I’ll help you gather information.” She leaped out of his lap and paced the room, her mind traveling to different possibilities. “I can ask Freyja. She seems more open than Agnarr, and she must know something.”

He shook his head. “She’s not stationed near headquarters.”

“But she’s in a relationship with Agnarr,” she said. “He must have shared something with her.”

“The two of them are together … romantically?”

“Yes. They’re mated to one another.”

“ Mated ?” He tilted his head to the side as if that would help him hear better, or understand better. When she didn’t elaborate, he lifted a dark brow. “What does that mean?”

“They did the Bryllup ceremony together. I guess it means they’re …

together.” Her face flushed at the thought of what the ceremony meant for the fae, and what it meant for her and Blár.

She whirled around until she was facing the fire, and she spread her hands out to warm them, but mostly to keep him from staring at her for too long. “Apparently, that makes us …”

He was quiet for a long while. “Mates?”

“I suppose so. It’s a fae thing, I guess,” she mumbled, casting a furtive glance his way. “Anyway, Agnarr and her are together in that sense and she’s?—”

Carrying his child .

But the words wouldn’t come out. For some reason, she didn’t want to reveal that vulnerable piece of information about the fae female.

“She’s …?”

“She’s …” Kolfinna placed her hands on her own belly, as if that was enough to tell him what she meant to say without saying it.

Blár stared at her and then at her hands. “What, Kolfinna?”

“I … don’t know if I should say it. It’s just a hunch of mine.”

“What is?”

“I think she’s … carrying …” The words burned her tongue and guilt twisted her insides until her stomach cramped painfully.

Revealing Freyja’s truth meant that someone could injure her unborn child, or take advantage of her vulnerability.

She didn’t think Blár could do such a thing, but what if Blár told someone who then went on to hurt the fae general?

She had a bad feeling about the whole thing.

Blár watched her carefully. “She’s pregnant.”

She cringed.

He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Does your father know?”

“I don’t think anyone does. At least, nobody acts like they do.”

They both remained silent for a moment longer.

Kolfinna cleared her throat and crossed the distance to where he was, and sat down beside him.

“I can try to talk to her before she leaves. Maybe she’ll open up to me?

Most of the generals are actually, sort of, nice to me.

Or at the very least, polite enough.” She was already formulating a plan.

“If I can’t get anything out of her, I can also try Floki, and maybe even Vidar.

Lately, he’s been opening up a bit more. ”

“Kolfinna, it’s dangerous. These people, these generals, may seem kind to you”—he said the word like it revolted him, but also perplexed him—“but they are incredibly dangerous people. Do you know how they found Bernsten’s body in the battlefield after that male fae was done with him?”

Kolfinna hesitated, unsure if she wanted to hear more.

Blár levelled her with a cool stare. “He was torn to shreds. Limb by limb. And his head was put on a spike at a tower of the headquarters. It’s still rotting there.”

A grotesque image filtered in her mind. She hadn’t known Commander Bernsten, Sijur’s father, but she wouldn’t have wished that kind of death on anyone. Nausea curdled her stomach.

Agnarr had done that? Her first impression of the golden-haired male fae had been that he was brutish and intimidating, so she shouldn’t have been too surprised.

She had to remind herself that the fae armies were cruel, and the only reason they treated her reasonably well was because she was Vidar’s daughter.

“I can do it,” she said after a moment. “They don’t trust me, of course, but I’m in a unique position with them. I can try to find more information. Please, Blár, let me help.”

He didn’t seem to like the sound of that, but he only sighed and nodded shortly. “Fine.”

The cogs in her brain were already spinning and grinding.

At least with a plan, there was hope . She felt like she would go mad if all she did was sit here and worry about the future.

About whether it was right for her to side with the humans.

She still wasn’t sure if she was making the right choice, but if Blár was in charge, she could imagine a future for the fae and humans.