Page 20 of The Comfort of Pain (The Black Market Omega #1)

Beth

I hate how much I love this nest.

Every blanket and pillow has been carefully arranged. I’ve worked hard. Molding and shaping. Fluffing and patting. It’s finally in the perfect shape.

Even my nest back at my parents’ house couldn't compare to this.

I snuggle against the velvety pink blanket, smelling Basil’s subtle, fresh scent, and Tristan’s intense, smokey one. It makes sense that I can smell the two so clearly. I’m positive the blanket underneath this pink one once belonged to them, but I don’t mind it. Their aromas go very well together.

“Omega?” Jeremy appears in the doorway to my cove.

Nope , I correct myself. It’s not my cove. It doesn't belong to me. But it could, the voice in the back of my head tries to convince me to stay. Annoyed, I force myself to sit up, concentrating hard on Jeremy’s bright eyes. “Yes?” I say as sweetly as I can.

“It’s dinnertime.” He steps to one side, encouraging me to leave my nest.

My body protests as I crawl toward the door. I just want to live in the tiny cove for the rest of my life, blocking out everything but the comforting smells and plush fabric. “I can help make it.” I reach the little landing.

“It’s already made.” Jeremy takes my hand, helping me step onto the little landing and into Killian’s room. “The boys made dinner tonight.”

I stare up at the beta, trying to process what he just said. “The alphas cooked?” I’m not sure if I’m impressed or scared. I’ve never met an alpha that can prepare a decent meal.

“Yes.” Jeremy laughs at the look on my face. “Basil is actually a pretty good cook, and Tristan isn’t bad either.” He drops his voice, and he whispers, “But Killian is just awful.”

I laugh at that, wondering just how bad he is. “My brothers are terrible cooks, too.” I follow the beta through the house. “My mother wanted her boys to be able to feed themselves, but not a single one of them is any good.”

“How many siblings do you have?” Jeremy asks in his usual friendly tone.

“Five brothers,” I say, a little excited to talk about them. I miss them terribly. “I’m the only girl.”

“ Five ?” Jeremy’s light blue eyes go wide as we slowly walk down the stairs. “That’s a big family.”

“You’re telling me.” I snort loudly. “Thankfully, we’re all spaced out.” I continue as we pass the gym. “I’m the oldest by quite a few years. The rest are fifteen, thirteen, eight, six, and seven months.”

“Wow.” Jeremy looks at me like I’m the most interesting person he’s ever met. “My brother and I are only a few years apart. Growing up, there were some days that we terrorized my poor mother. I think six kids might have killed her.”

I laugh, wishing I could meet his brother. I wonder if he has the same icy-blue eyes. “It helps that we’re all so far apart in age. I can help with the young ones. I mean, I’m almost twenty-four years older than the baby.”

“What baby?” Killian asks as we enter the kitchen. He’s still shirtless. All three of them are as they flit around the kitchen, preparing dinner.

This is torture.

“Beth has five brothers,” Jeremy says like he still can’t believe it.

“Damn.” Killian glances at me as he pours a pot of hot water into the sink, straining something.

“That’s a fuck-ton of kids,” Tristan says with a loud snort. “Your poor mother.” He picks up two baskets of bread, then cuts around the kitchen island. We follow the alpha, and my stomach growls loudly.

Basil places a big bowl of leafy greens on the table, then pulls my chair out for me. “I hope you like spaghetti.”

Excitement swirls in my chest as I quickly take my seat. “I love it.” I stifle a happy thrill. “Pasta takes so much time to make, so we rarely have it, but I do love it.”

“Well, sadly the pasta is store-bought.” Basil takes his usual seat next to me. “But it’s still decent.”

“It’s the best damn spaghetti on earth.” Tristan sits down across from me. “But the garlic bread is the best part.” He places a large piece on my plate. “I made it,” he whispers, his voice deep and rumbly in the air.

“Thank you.” I pick up the piece of buttery bread, staring at it and not the massive alphas around me.

“Let's eat.” Killian places a big bowl of noodles covered in red sauce on the table, and we dig in.

The boys chat, keeping the conversation pretty light. Tristan talks about a car he’s been fixing up for the last few months, and Basil mentions a job he’s taking tomorrow. A pang of sadness grips me at the thought of him not being here, and I have to remind myself that I won’t be here either.

My gaze drifts to the green vase in the corner. The tiny paring knife and my meager stash of food sits at the bottom. The knife is weak protection and the food will only last me a day, maybe two. I might try to see what’s in the pantry tonight, but I hid that stuff so I wouldn’t have to rummage through anything. The less noise I make the better.

“All done?” Basil asks, eyeing my plate. It’s only then that I realize that everyone else is done, and what’s left of my pasta has gone cold.

“Yes.” I pick the plate up, but Killian grabs my wrist, stopping me.

“Put it down, omega,” he says gently.

Confusion pulls my brows together. “Why?”

“That’s not your job,” the pack alpha says simply, and I instantly feel bad for Jeremy. This is a lot for one beta to clean up all by himself.

“I can help,” I say firmly as I stand, but Killian doesn’t release me.

“Hand it over.” Tristan takes the plate from my hand. I’m about to argue with him, when he says, “That’s my job.”

“Really?” I ask, in shock as he and Basil begin to wash up.

“Why don’t you go and lay down?” Jeremy says as he begins putting the leftovers in a plastic bowl. There’s not much. Tristan ate most of it. “You’ve had a pretty chaotic week.” The beta snaps a lid on the food. “Go lay down in your nest.”

My nest.

That perfect, amazing nest.

For a brief moment, I hope Killian will rut me in it. After all, I’ve never laid with a man in a nest before, but I don’t want to make leaving harder than it already is. I can’t let him touch me. It’s wrong.

I love Linden, and I’m determined to get home to him and my family…assuming I’m not sold off the second I walk in the door.

Tension builds in my chest as I think about the chaos waiting for me at home. Are the Frolen’s still at my house? Will Burke kill me? Sell me to someone new? Let me stay? Will Linden even attempt to see me again?

I wouldn’t blame the beta if he moved on. After all, it’s not like we’ll be together for long. Not if Burke gets his way. But it would be nice to see him just one more time.

“Come on, omega.” Killian takes my hand, leading me away from the table.

Without meaning to, I snuggle against his side, soaking up his amazing aroma. I just feel so overwhelmed. There’s so much I don’t know.

“Let’s get you in bed.” Killian’s hand slips around my waist and I realize that I’m too close.

Embarrassed, I pull away, trying to keep some distance between my body and his. Thankfully, he releases me, but the voice in the back of my mind begs me to cuddle him. To touch, kiss, and lick the stunning blond alpha.

Shit .

It’s definitely time to go.

Killian moves right behind me, following me closely through the house. The heat and intensity radiating off of him is impossible to ignore. He’s so much bigger than me. So strong.

I’m scared of what he’ll try to do to me once we get inside that bedroom, but more than that, I’m scared of what I want him to do.

My fingers tremble as I turn the doorknob and step into the bedroom. The lamp on the bedside table gives off a soft, orange glow, and the moonlight streams in through the massive window. It almost looks… romantic ?

“Thank you for walking me up.” I move quickly to the center of the room, praying the alpha will turn around and leave me alone. But Killian shuts the door behind him, clearly having no intention of going anywhere.

Shit .

“I’m really tired,” I say, trying not to be rude. Sweet as pie, I remind myself. My cheery attitude has worked all day, and there’s no reason it won’t work right now. “Thank you so much for everything today,” I say while Killian pulls the curtains, blocking out the moonlight, “but I really do want to go to sleep.”

The alpha turns to me, and my pulse quickens. I hold my breath as he walks straight to me. I think about running to my nest and hiding in there, but I hold firm, bracing myself. But then he breezes right past me and I slowly exhale.

“You and Jeremy seem to be getting along.” He stops next to the worn armchair next to my cove.

The cove. Not mine!

“He really likes you.” Killian pops the button on his jeans, and my whole body flushes hot.

“Jeremy is a very nice beta,” I say a little too loudly, still trying to think of what I can say or do to make the alpha leave. My instincts are telling me to run, but my mother always said to never run from an alpha unless you’re positive you can get away. The chase excites them. “Your whole pack is kind.” I back up, trying to put some distance between us.

But Killian doesn’t say anything. He just pushes his jeans down his long legs, revealing his big, hard cock. He’s so long, with soft twisting veins curling around the shaft. Just the sight of it makes my mouth water.

“I want to go to sleep,” I say, despite the slick already gathering between my legs. “I’m tired and I?—”

“Beth,” Killian growls my name as he moves toward me. I take another step back, and slick trickles down my inner thigh. “You know I’m not going to hurt you.” He takes another step, and another. I keep moving, not stopping until the back of my legs smack into the foot of the bed. “We both know what you need.” He stops right in front of me, his big hard body looming over me. “You need to be touched.”

“No,” I say firmly, but I’m nodding.

“It’s okay, omega.” His long hair falls into his face as he bends down. He’s going to kiss me.

“I'm tired,” I whisper, too flustered to speak any louder. He’s so close.

Killian pauses, looking deep into my eyes. I can’t tell what he’s thinking. “You know I won’t hurt you.” He brushes my hair out of my eyes. His long fingers slip over the side of my face, and down the edge of my jaw before pausing under my chin. “Let me take care of you,” he purrs, deep and slow, as he brings his head down to the crook of my neck. The tip of his nose glides over my sensitive skin, inhaling me deeply.

My head swims, making me wobble, and my clit begins to tingle. Don't give in, I tell myself. Demand he leave!

But right as I open my mouth to speak, Killian places a single kiss right beneath my ear. He hums softly, and all thought falls from my head.

“Ah-alpha,” I stutter, trying to hold on to what little sanity I have left. “Don’t—” His warm hand touches the other side of my neck, pulling me closer. Sharp teeth nip at my skin. A shiver cuts through me and slick gushes.

You don’t want this! My mind screams, but my body hums.

Determined to collect myself, I inhale deeply and immediately regret it. My nostrils flare as I pull in Killian’s deep, masculine scent. Sharp whiskey, sweet cherries, and a warm musk that makes my nipples pull impossibly tight.

“No,” I whimper high in my throat, and Killian purrs louder.

He lifts his head, looking deep into my eyes. “It’s okay,” he repeats as his arm slips around my waist, holding me against his firm body. His cock pushes up between us, and pre-cum soaks through my shirt. “Let me take care of you. Let your alpha?—”

“I have a boyfriend,” I blurt out, loud and clear. And I instantly regret it.

Killian goes stiff. The look in his eyes immediately shifts from soft and sweet to angry. “What?” His voice is scary and sharp, making me tremble. “What did you say?” he demands and his scent burns the inside of my nose.

In an instant, all the nervous energy thrumming through my veins dies. And I’m left empty and kind of numb. Fear is always cold.

“A boyfriend?” Killian’s teeth flash, and my palms begin to sweat.

I knew the sweet-alpha-act was all a lie, but it’s not exactly something I’m happy about.

“You said I was the first alpha to enter your hot, wet cunt.” His crass words make me shiver. “Was that a lie?”

“No!” Panic makes my voice pitch high. “You’re the only alpha,” I say quickly, terrified he’s going to draw blood. “I’m so sorry,” I say, completely enraged with myself for bringing up Linden. What was I thinking? “I know you spent a lot of money to get me, but I have a family that needs me. A boyfriend who’s looking for me.” I suck in a deep breath, trying not to cry. “Please…” I stare at Killian’s muscular, bare chest pressed firmly against mine. “Please, don’t hurt me.” I press my chin to my chest, trying to look submissive and small. Maybe he won’t beat me too much if he realizes how defenseless I am. “I need to see my mother. I need to go home.”

Killian pulls in a sharp breath, but I’m too scared to look up at him. “Beth.” I flinch, despite the fact that his voice comes out shockingly calm. “Your family beat you.” His words land like a goddamn punch in the gut.

I should have just let him fuck me.

“Stop it.” I look up at the alpha. “They’re still my family. They love me and miss?—”

“They love you?” He lets out a bitter laugh, gripping my waist even tighter. “They don’t deserve you.” His eyes flash, and his face flushes red. I’m amazed he hasn’t hit me yet. “And why didn’t your boyfriend ,” Killian snarls as he says the word, “stop them?”

Gnashing my teeth, I force myself to keep looking the alpha in the eye. “Linden didn’t know,” I say honestly. Killian’s eyes narrow, clearly not believing that. “I had to sneak out in the middle of the night to see him,” I defend the beta, “and even then I could only see him sometimes. It wasn’t hard to hide the bruises or to wait for them to heal.”

Killian’s hands fall from my body, but he doesn't back up. He remains planted, looming over me. “What kind of alpha pursues an omega in secret?” he asks in a harsh tone, clearly judging Linden. “Why didn’t he declare his intentions?”

“He’s a beta,” I say simply, ready to defend Linden from whatever horrible things Killian is about to say—some alphas see them as lesser. Weak and pathetic.

But Killian doesn’t say anything, instead, he lets out a heavy sigh and his anger seems to fade. “So you were exploring with a beta?” His voice is so much softer. Kinder. Maybe even curious.

“I guess.” I shrug, not really sure what he means. “We love each other,” I say, knowing it might set him off all over again, but I’m too tired and scared.

“You love him?” Killian’s dark eyes search mine, almost as if expecting to read the truth written within them.

“Yes,” I say with a firm nod. “And Linden loves me.” But the second the words leave my mouth, I wonder if that’s even true. “I mean, he never said that he loves me,” I say unable to stop myself, “and I didn’t say it to him, but not everyone has to say that kind of thing out loud.” I can’t stop myself from babbling, but Killian is so close. Too close. His masculine scent builds all around me, growing so strong it burns the inside of my throat. “Linden is a wonderful man and a good beta,” I finally say, hoping this whole conversation is over and Killian will leave.

“This guy,” Killian pauses as if trying to remember his name, “Linden,” his teeth flash as he says his name. “He never told you he loved you or cared deeply for you? Not even once?” He stares at my face, his powerful alpha presence making it impossible to lie.

“Um,” I shake my head, feeling a little embarrassed. “He didn't have to,” I mumble, realizing how silly I must sound.

“And he never noticed the dark bruises that littered your skin?” Killian’s tone goes sharp, almost challenging me to defend the beta. “He fucked you. Saw every inch of you. And chose to ignore the awful marks on your body?”

Irrational anger grips me, and I push at Killian’s chest. He doesn't even sway. “That’s not how it was.” I ball up my fists, hating the alpha for trying to ruin the few good moments I’ve had this last year.

“He doesn’t love you, Beth,” Killian says with absolute confidence. “He never did.”

“Stop it,” I demand. “You don’t know. You?—”

“I do know.” Killian’s voice is soft. Firm. Confident. “And that beta used you.”

Tears burn the back of my eyes, and I lose all control. “Linden was the only person that treated me like I was an actual person!” I yell.

A calm seems to settle over Killian and his expression relaxes as he listens to me rage.

“He was the only one that didn’t beat me, berate me, force me to do chores or watch the babies.” Tears blur my vision as I continue to scream, “He was the only one that took care of me. The only one that made me happy.” I begin to cry. “He was the only one that didn’t hurt me!” Deep ragged sobs rack my body and my chest heaves. “Why did they hurt me?”

Muscular arms wrap around me, pulling me to Killian’s big body. “It’s okay.” He cradles me, urging me to rest my cheek against his firm chest. His skin is so warm, and his scent is so soothing. “You can cry,” he whispers, pressing his nose to the top of my head. “You’re safe here.”

I let out several deep wails, feeling my chest heave with each violent sound. “Why did my mom let them hurt me?” I cry through spit and snot. “Why didn’t she stop them? Why didn’t she protect me?” I’m lifted off my feet. Killian carries me, but I don’t look where. I’m too devastated.

Too broken.

He can do whatever he wants to me. I don’t care anymore.

My body is placed in the center of the bed. I go limp as the alpha removes my shirt and pants, leaving me completely naked. I don’t fight him. There’s no point. Alphas give pain and violence. And omegas take it.

It’s just the way it is.

The light is clicked off and the bed dips. I close my eyes.

This is it.

He’s going to fuck me while my heart breaks into a million pieces.

I hope his dick splits in two while he’s inside me.

Firm hands maneuver me on the bed, forcing me onto my side. Killian settles directly behind me, pressing his chest against my back, then he curls his naked body around me, holding me gently. I hold my breath, not sure what he’s doing. Is he going to enter me from behind?

“It can be hard for mothers to protect their young,” Killian whispers, pulling the covers up and over both of us. “Especially when the threat is inside their own home.” He moves my hair off of my neck. “Don’t hate your mother too much. I’m sure she has done the best she can with what she was given.” He places a single kiss on my bare shoulder.

I don’t say anything. But he’s right. My mother has done so much for me. And despite my ugly outburst, I have never blamed her for what Burke has done and what Tony and Scott have allowed. After all, she’s just as weak as me—a lowly omega, with no one to love or protect her.

“Go to sleep, Beth,” Killian’s voice has a slight alpha edge to it, making my eyes instantly close. “Dream about something soft and sweet.” He kisses my shoulder again, before relaxing against me.

I let out a long, pained breath, trying to force away the ache in my heart. But then the pack alpha begins to purr and all my bones seem to vanish.

Before I know it, I drift off, warm and safe in Killian’s strong arms.