Page 15 of The Comfort of Pain (The Black Market Omega #1)

Beth

Fear, panic, and rage grip me, and I scream at the top of my lungs. “Put me down!” I slam my fists against his back over and over again. But Killian doesn’t say a word. He quietly carries me down the hall and up the stairs.

Why isn’t he commanding me to stop?

Because he wants you to tire yourself out , I answer my own question. Realizing it would be smarter to save my energy, I stop, then go limp.

“All done?” Killian asks as he steps into his bedroom. I can still smell Jeremy’s bright scent lingering in the air.

“Put me down,” I ask, a little calmer, and ready to run the second my feet touch the floor.

“What you did was not appropriate,” Killian says as he shuts the door behind him. I hear a lock click into place, but all I can see is the alpha’s back. “You don’t stab people, Beth.” He walks to the bed. “We talked about this.”

He’s right, of course. But I refuse to admit it.

“I don’t belong to you,” I say as he sits on the foot of the bed. Big hands grip my hips and I slide down his front. I tense, ready to run or fight, but right before my feet can touch the floor, Killian manhandles me, flinging me over his knee. Confused, I lay there for a second, hair hanging in my face, trying to figure out what the hell he’s doing.

“You could have really hurt me.” Killian’s voice is so calm, and it enrages me to no end. “I know you grew up in a house where that kind of violence was commonplace, but we don’t do that here.” He shifts, trapping my legs between his and pushing my head low to the ground.

“What—” I jolt, then scream when my nightgown is pulled up. Cool air hits my exposed thighs first, then my backside. Before I can process what’s happening, a sharp smack lands on my bare ass. “Gah!” I grab the side of Killian’s thigh, squeezing with all my might. “What the fuck?”

“Calm down, Beth.” Killian palms my ass, squeezing my stinging flesh. His fingers spread wide, covering one whole cheek. “Relax and take your punishment.” But it’s not a command. He seems to rarely use his alpha voice on me.

I’m not sure how I feel about that.

Suddenly, the alpha’s hand disappears, then lands hard, delivering two swift pops. One on each cheek. It stings, radiating up and down my spine, but I’ve been beaten worse. “We don’t treat others like that in this house,” he says. “We treat each other with respect.” He caresses my hot backside. “Do you understand?”

An irrational anger grips me—just like it did downstairs.

In the last two days, I have been beaten, shamed, snatched, drugged, and sold. And this asshole wants to lecture me on the fucking house rules?

I want to fucking kill him. Rip him limb from limb, then dance in a river of his blood.

“Beth?” Killian’s firm tone pulls me from my thoughts. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“Fuck you,” I snarl at the carpet inches from my face.

His flat palm lands on my ass again, but this one hits ten times harder than the previous spankings. My body bucks as pain cuts up my backside right to the base of my skull. A hot tingling sensation crawls across my skin, then it creeps lower. Very low. My pussy pulses, and slick begins to seep.

I’m so confused by my body’s response that I don’t even react when Killian spanks me again.

“Have you had enough?” Killian asks, leaning over to see my face, but my hair blocks his view. I’m glad. I don’t want him to see how flushed I am. “Omega?” He spanks me again, making my body rock against his firm thigh. “Have you learned your lesson?”

And then I feel it.

Something long and thick pokes at my side, digging into my hip. He’s hard.

I’m instantly dizzy and my breathing picks up.

“Beth?” Killian’s voice is a deep, throaty rumble. “Answer me, omega. Have you had enough?”

A drop of slick trickles down the inside of my leg and something devious slips over me. My abs flex as I lift up, then turn to look at the alpha the best I can. “No.” My tone is purposefully sharp as I hold Killian’s gaze. “I haven’t had enough.”

There’s a flash of something in the alpha’s eyes, but it’s not rage. It’s lust.

Wild, unhinged lust.

Without warning, Killian’s hand draws back, then lands on my ass one, two, three times, each smack stronger and louder than the last. It burns then simmers, sending a wave of pleasure washing over me. My thighs begin to shake, and I call out, “Fuck!” I push my ass back into his palm, needing him to massage the sting away.

“Tell me you’re sorry.” Killian fists my hair, forcing my head up. This one is a gentle command. One I could ignore if I wanted.

Trying not to think about the gush of slick between my legs, I glare at Killian out of the corner of my eye. The desire to continue riling him up is strong, but the pressure between my legs is stronger. “Fine.” I lick my lips and his gaze falls to my mouth, watching my tongue poke out. “I’m sorry,” I hiss, making sure he knows I’m only saying it because he’s demanding it.

For a moment, Killian’s expression stays hard, his eyes narrowed and his jaw tight. But then the corners of his mouth lift, and a short, bitter laugh pushes from his chest. “You like being a brat. Don’t you?” His question is almost playful, catching me off guard.

Not sure how to answer, I press my mouth into a tight line. But before I can say anything, firm hands grip me under my arms. Killian lifts me, forcing me to sit on his lap. Slick soaks through my nightgown and all over the alpha’s jeans. He doesn't react to it, but I know he can feel it.

“You took your punishment well.” Killian cups my cheek. His hand feels weirdly cool. It makes me realize just how flushed I am. Sweat covers my cheeks and forehead. “You’re a very good girl, Beth. I’m proud of you.”

Something like happiness blooms in my chest, followed quickly by a strange desire to hear the alpha praise me again.

What’s happening to me?

“Now,” Killian brings his face closer, ghosting his mouth over mine, “do you want me to make it feel better?”

The word “No” instantly pops into my head. I don’t want to feel better. I want to bathe in the pain and pleasure pulsing throughout my body. As fucked up as it is, I want to savor the sensation.

It makes me feel alive.

I decide to say nothing.

“Fuck.” Killian’s nostrils flare, and he growls deep in his chest. “You smell too fucking good.” His hand moves from my face and into my hair. He grips the roots, tugging gently.

Goosebumps flash down my arms and up my back, and I arch my back. A gentle moan slips from my throat, and Killian kisses me softly. His lips brush over mine, feeling me and scenting me at the same time. It feels… amazing .

“See?” he whispers, his hot breath fanning across my face. “It’s not hard to obey. Is it?” Then he kisses me deeply. It’s intense and possessive, gripping my hair and tasting my mouth.

But I’m too angry to enjoy it.

It’s not hard to obey.

Burke said that to me that night. He stood over me, watching me bleed all over the floor. He called me a whore, mocking me for not obeying him.

It doesn’t matter what I do. Alphas will always want me to obey. To calm down, speak up, be quiet, wake up, sit down, and on and on and on. I will spend the rest of my life being pushed and pulled in every direction, at the mercy of an alpha that will never be happy with me. Whether it be Burke, or Killian, or some unknown pack, I will never be able to just exist.

And I fucking hate them all for it.

Killian moans into my mouth, and I bite down hard. I catch the tip of his tongue between my teeth, making the alpha rear back. “What the fuck?” He releases me, and I run.

My legs shake, my knees struggling to hold me up. There’s slick everywhere.

“Goddamnit!” Killian snatches me around the waist, pulling me off the floor.

I reach out, trying to reach for the door, but it’s no use.

“Stop fighting me!” Killian commands as he drops me onto the center of the bed. My body obeys and I go completely limp. “I’m not trying to hurt you.” He crawls over me, his big body completely covering mine.

At least he’s still clothed…for now.

“Can’t you see that we want to take care of you?” He holds himself over me, his big cock pushing at the front of his pants. It’s just a matter of time before he frees it and shoves it inside me. The thought makes me shiver, and something like excitement washes over me. I frown, confused.

I don’t want him to rut me, I silently tell myself. But my pussy is already throbbing, eager to be stuffed and used.

“I know you’ve been hurt.” Killian cups my cheek. “You’re used to violence and hate, but all we want is for you to be happy.” His tender words slice through me, and tears burn the back of my eyes.

“But I do-don’t want you.” I struggle to get the words out because while my mind is sure, my body is screaming for this alpha to claim me.

A mischievous smile fills Killian’s face, and he brushes the hair out of my eyes. “If you don’t want me, then why are you slicking all over yourself?” His chest expands as he inhales deeply. A delicious growl fills the air as he lowers himself down, pressing his hips against mine.

A bolt of electricity erupts from deep inside me, and my back instinctively arches.

I need him. I hate him. I can’t stand how empty I am.

It’s painful.

“I think you do want me.” Killian rumbles as he tugs on my nightgown, pulling it up. The silky material slides across my skin, leaving a wonderful tingle in its wake. “I think you want to be loved.” He presses a soft kiss to my lips. “And cared for.” He kisses me again. “And cherished.” He falls onto me, kissing me deeply.

My body instantly responds and hot slick gushes from my pussy. I still don’t want this, but I don’t have any fight left in me. I’m too tired and weak, desperate to feel good for a fucking moment in my life.

“Alpha,” I moan when he pushes his hips forward, making me feel his impressive bulge.

“Such a good omega,” Killian purrs, pushing my nightgown higher and higher. The soft fabric is then tugged over my head, leaving me completely bare. Killian rises, looking down the full length of my body. It’s a little weird. Maybe even embarrassing, but I’m powerless to stop him. “Look how stunning you are,” he whispers like I’m some kind of treasure and not some bruised, broken thing that everyone just puts up with.

“Please.” I lift my hips, eager to feel him inside me. While I’ve never been with an alpha, I’m sure it’s not that different from a beta. After all, they both have the same parts. Just different sizes.

“I need to taste that pussy.” Killian’s long blond hair falls into his face, tickling my skin as he inches his way down my body. He pauses at my breasts, capturing one nipple between his lips as he plucks the other. I arch up into his mouth, greedy for each lap of his tongue and nip of his teeth.

“Please,” I channel my fingers through his hair, holding him to me. His soft beard tickles against my skin, making goosebumps rise. “Kill—” I gasp loudly when he cups the mound of my pussy.

“This cunt is hot.” Killian’s eyes flash with excitement above me. “And wet.” He moves his hand down, pushing between my soaked folds. A single finger dips into my entrance, then another. I hold my breath, eager for him to move, but he doesn’t. He just stares at my face. “Am I the first alpha to be inside you?”

“What?” I’m delirious with need. Too wound up to talk about anything other than the pleasure slowly simmering beneath my skin. “Please.” I lift my hips, trying to create some friction, but Killian presses his other hand to my belly, stopping me.

“Am I the first alpha to have you?” he asks again, this time softer. Slower. It’s shockingly commanding.

“Why?” I manage to ask, but I’m already nodding.

A shadow crosses Killian’s face as he leans down and says, “Because I want to be the first to ruin you.”

A thrill rushes up my spine and my nipples pull impossibly tight. “Just you,” I pant then squirm. While it is the truth, I’m willing to say anything at this point just to have him move his fingers. “You’re the only alpha.”

A faint smile lifts Killian’s mouth, and his fingers finally move. He pumps in and out of me as he lowers himself, dropping down between my legs. Continuing to thrust inside me, he uses his other hand and lifts the hood of my pussy. He exhales one long, deliberate breath against my clit, before falling into me, mouth open and tongue out.

He laps and sucks, devouring my pussy like it’s a goddamn feast.

A desperate moan rips from me as heat coils in my belly. I grind against his face, letting his hot tongue and long fingers force me right over the edge. I cry out as I come, my thighs trembling and my back arching. But Killian doesn’t stop. As if reading my mind, he quickens his pace, making sure I feel every fucking pulse of pleasure.

When I finally come down, I’m breathing so hard I fear I’ll pass out. “What—” I lift my head, trying to make sense of what just happened.

“Don’t move,” Killian commands me as he slowly rolls off the bed. His eyes drill into mine as he strips off his shirt and tosses it onto the floor. The alpha's impressive frame is packed with lean muscle. Firm pecs, washboard abs, and a deep-cut V that disappears into his waistband. His hands hang at his side as he turns to me. They’re large with long fingers and soft, twisting veins.

I feel so tiny in his presence.

But then he pushes his boxers down his long legs and fear grips me.

He’s huge.

Two, maybe three times bigger than Linden.

“It’s okay, omega. I’ll fit.” Killian grips his cock, pumping it slowly. Pre-cum leaks from the tip, dripping in one long string onto the floor. My mouth waters and my pussy flutters, but my mind still isn’t so sure. “I’ll go as slow as you need me to.” Killian places one knee on the bed. The mattress dips and fear takes hold.

I move, trying to roll away, but strong alpha hands grab me, forcing me back in place.

“No!” I shove at his chest as he settles over me. His cock pokes at my entrance, and a fresh wave of slick gushes from my body. “I don’t want—” All the air is sucked out of me as Killian ruts forward. He impales me on his thick shaft, forcing inch after inch into my tight body.

“Fuck!” He roars then stops, holding himself just inside me.

It hurts, making my abs spasm. “Stop,” I whine as my vision drifts in and out of focus.

“It’s okay,” Killian pants, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “Just a little more.”

It takes me a second to realize what he means, then his hips move and more cock is shoved inside me. It pinches, then burns, consuming my entire body. “No!” I scream, slamming my fists against his shoulders and back. I swear my stomach bulges where his cock pushes at my insides.

“All done,” Killian whispers, not doing a damn thing to stop me from hurting him. And he shouldn’t. He’s ripping me in two. The least he can do is let me inflict a little of my own pain.

“Stop!” I pant then puff, struggling to breathe through the pain. “Take it out.” I strain, trying to escape the pain inside me.

And then he purrs.

As if a switch was flicked, every tense muscle in my ragged body turns to jelly and my hips instantly relax. It takes a second, but my inner muscles loosen, adjusting to the intrusion. And just like that, the pain settles and the burn falls away like magic.

“That’s a good girl,” Killian hums as he settles on his forearms. It frees up his hands to cradle my face as he kisses my cheeks, lips, and even over my eyes. I’m still breathing hard, but I somehow relax as my body molds to his impossible girth. “Such a good omega.” Killian’s hips pull back ever so slightly, then push back into me.

An unintentional moan pushes from my throat, and he does it again.

“Can you feel how hard I am?” Killian rumbles in my ear. “Do you feel how turned on you make me?”

I’m nodding. Why am I nodding? I don’t want this. I want to leave. I want to walk right out that door and never see this fucking pack again.

“More,” I beg, spreading my legs a little wider. “Please.” I rest my hands on his shoulders, needing him closer.

“I’ll give you more.” His voice grows tight as he begins to fuck me properly. His thick cock pistons in and out of me, his hips slapping against my wet skin. The feel of him so deep, and so wide, has my body spiraling already. Intense pleasure builds and I move my hips with his, desperate to come again. “Come for me, omega,” Killian snarls, and his cock twitches inside me.

He’s close. I can feel it.

“Come!” Killian’s alpha command rains down on me, and my body explodes.

Wave after wave of unimaginable pleasure crashes over me, just as Killian lets out a mighty roar. Heat bursts inside me as he comes at the same time. My inner muscles clamp down on his dick, massaging his cock. Milking him of every drop of cum.

But it’s not quite enough. Something is missing. I need… a knot .

The realization makes me jerk and my eyes snap open.

“Such a good girl.” Killian pulls his cock out of me. A gush of warmth pushes from my abused entrance. “Look at that,” he stares down my body, and I lift my head. There’s a tinge of blood on his shiny cock, proof of how thoroughly he just rutted me.

Why do I feel proud?

“You did so well, Beth.” Killian kisses the tip of my nose then he moves. He tucks my back against his chest, curling around my still-flushed body. He places a gentle kiss on my shoulder before dropping his head into the crook of my neck. He nuzzles right beneath my ear, scenting me gently.

It feels so good, but I’m too confused to enjoy it.

You don’t want this alpha to knot you. You want to go home, I remind myself, shocked that my body would crave anything else.

Because I do miss my family.

I want to play with the little ones in the yard and pick wildflowers around the back of the house. I want to sit in the living room and finish crocheting a new blanket with my mom. I want to hear her sweet voice and feel her fingers in my hair.

They all feel a million miles away.

Slowly, I close my eyes, then suck in a forceful breath as I make up my mind.

I can’t reason with this pack. Even Jeremy. It’s clear they won’t let me go or help me get home. I’ll have to sneak out. I’ll have to make them trust me so I can slip away, but I don’t have much time. Maybe a day or two. I vaguely remember a discussion about heat-suppressors, and how they’d leave my system soon, but I can’t remember how soon. And once they wear off, I won’t be able to stop myself from begging this pack to mate me.

No. I won’t allow that to happen.

Tomorrow morning, I’ll wake up, and be sweet as pie. I’ll be so friendly and kind while I gather what supplies I can, then when their backs are turned, I’ll leave.

Simple.

Easy.

Smart.

… I hope .