Page 36 of The Boathouse by the Loch (The Scottish Highlands #4)

She should have been disappointed to hear she’d just missed meeting one of them, but she felt a huge relief. She felt absurdly anxious about the prospect. Once again, she recalled that Annie had told her not to be intimidated at the thought of meeting them just because they were very rich.

But it wasn’t that. Robyn’s thoughts turned again to the doll’s house.

She could feel her face growing bright red at the thought that Jake Campbell-Ross had actually been right there in Lark Lodge.

Did he remember the old doll’s house in the basement of The Lake House?

Did he see the resemblance to some of the rooms she’d decorated?

‘Are you all right?’ Gayle asked. ‘Your face has gone bright pink.’

‘It’s, um—’

‘Rather hot in here,’ David said.

‘Oh, I did wonder if lighting the fire was overdoing it a bit on a summer’s evening. I just thought it added a bit of ambience,’ Gayle said. She poured them both a glass of bubbly. ‘I expect him back soon.’

‘He’s coming back?’

‘I hope so. I’ve kept the attic room available for his return.’

‘When?’ Robyn looked over at the door, as though he’d walk in at any moment. ‘Tonight?’

‘Oh, not tonight. He only left this morning. I’d expect the earliest would be tomorrow. He could turn up at any time.’

‘Any time?’

‘Yes, as I said, the room is ready. He’s paid upfront for several more days, so I’m hoping he’ll return, otherwise I’m going to refund him the money or put it towards another week if he wants to postpone his trip.’ She put the bottle of bubbly down. ‘Well, I’ll leave you two lovebirds in peace.’

‘I’ve changed my mind about staying the weekend.’ Robyn caught David raising his eyebrows in surprise.

‘Oh, you have?’ said Gayle, looking equally surprised. ‘I thought you said—’ She paused. ‘Ah, I understand. It’s Jake Campbell-Ross.’

‘Why do you say that?’ Robyn could feel the colour rising in her cheeks again.

‘I didn’t mean it’s him in particular. I understand it’s not quite the same with other guests staying here, not like it was before, with just you, Marty and Nick.’

Robyn nodded. ‘Sorry.’

‘Oh, don’t be, Robyn. I’m just so happy things are working out and you’re both going back to the boathouse.’

Robyn caught David smiling and forced a smile too.

The problem was that she didn’t want to go back to the boathouse the next day.

She wanted to stay at Lark Lodge for the weekend so that she had more time to gather her thoughts.

She knew she couldn’t carry on with an absurd feeling of dread every time she returned there.

But the thought of ending up face to face with Jake Campbell-Ross meant she had no choice.

If there was any possibility he might return over the weekend, she had to leave.

She knew it was irrational, but she just had to.

She just wished she didn’t have to return to the boathouse.

Gayle said, ‘Well, it’s not the same with other guests here, obviously.

Right now, it’s like old times – isn’t it?

But you know, it’s a guesthouse now, and you two want time to yourselves.

’ She paused. ‘Well, on that note, I’ll leave you to enjoy your dinner.

’ Gayle turned on her heel and headed back to the kitchen.

Robyn put her spoon in her stew. She’d been so surprised when David had mentioned staying there for the weekend. She had been looking forward to it. Now, after that conversation, she was leaving first thing in the morning instead.

David said, ‘I’m so pleased we’re going back to the boathouse. It’s rather silly, but I was afraid that after you surprised me here, and you’d arranged for us to stay the night, you might not want to leave. ’

Robyn let out a little laugh as she plunged her spoon into the stew, avoiding eye contact.

Robyn resolved to enjoy the rest of her evening and not think about returning to the boathouse.

Sitting on the end of the bed, recalling the previous night, Robyn had put her worries to the back of her mind so that they could enjoy their evening together. But now all she could think about was returning to the boathouse.

She suddenly had a thought. She didn’t want to face what might be in her past. She’d been avoiding it, hoping all her memories didn’t come back – especially, for some reason, the memory she had of sitting in a car in the dark at the boathouse, wanting to leave, to run.

But what if it wasn’t as bad as all that?

What if there was just some innocent explanation as to why she had been there?

She’d only know for sure if she remembered everything.

Robyn picked up one of the cushions they’d hastily tossed to the end of the bed and onto the floor amidst their urgent love-making the previous night. David was still holding her hand. Robyn was sitting cross-legged on the bed, facing him.

He asked, ‘What is it, Robyn?’

‘I’m thinking of going to see Dr Jamieson.’

‘Dr Jamieson?’

‘You know, the doctor at the hospital who treated me when I was taken in after the accident last Christmas.’

David looked at her, wide-eyed. ‘Is something wrong?’

Robyn frowned. Of course there was something wrong. Her memories still hadn’t come back. He knew that. But Robyn didn’t want to be sarcastic. It wasn’t his fault. ‘It’s just the memory thing. Maybe she can help.’

‘Your memory loss? I thought you said you didn’t want your memories back? I thought you said you were happy the way things were?’

Robyn stared at David. There was that anxious look again.

‘Don’t you want me to get my memories back?’

‘Well … um … of course.’

‘You don’t sound too sure.’

He moved towards her, taking both her hands. ‘Look, about what I said last night …’

She waited for him to go on. He’d said a lot of things the previous night. They both had at dinner, and then in the throes of passion afterwards. Lying entwined in each other’s arms, they had said how much they loved one another.

David continued. ‘I’m talking about how worried I’ve been about you … about us.’

Robyn pursed her lips.

‘Look, I’ve got to be honest with you. No, I don’t want your memories to come back, because I’m afraid …’

Robyn said, ‘Go on.’

‘Well, I’m afraid that there’s someone in your past, and if you remember … then I might lose you if you go back to them.’

‘No, I’ll never go back to them!’ Robyn cried.

David sat back in surprise at her outburst. ‘So, there is someone?’

Robyn put her hand to her mouth. ‘Honestly, I don’t remember.’

‘Then why did you just say—?’

‘I don’t know! It’s just a feeling.’ A not very nice feeling , she thought. The same one of dread she had whenever she recalled sitting in a car outside the boathouse in the pitch dark.

‘Now you see – don’t you? Why I need to go back to the hospital and find out if someone can help me remember?

I thought I could, you know, carry on as I am – without my memories.

In fact, I wanted it that way. My life is here now.

I don’t want to look back. But I can’t keep feeling this way, afraid of what’s really in my past.’

‘I understand. Robyn. It’s the elephant in the room, isn’t it? Sometimes it’s better to just face your fears. I bet whatever it is you’re afraid of is not half as bad as you think.’

Robyn hoped so . She had a sudden thought that came out of nowhere. It wasn’t the doll’s house that connected her to the Rosses. It was something in her past.

David took both her hands in his once again. ‘So, you haven’t been meeting anyone else while you’ve been away in London, apart from clients?’

Robyn let out a nervous laugh. ‘Of course not.’

‘No one from your past?’

‘Well, that would be a bit difficult, seeing as I don’t remember.’ Robyn shook her head, pursing her lips, hating to lie. It was true, she didn’t remember. Not everything. But she had found herself face to face with someone, and it had not been at all what she had expected.