Page 36 of That Conflicted Feeling

“Well, then that’s definitely the oneIwant.”

“Shemakes all kinds,” continuesGloria. “Ikeep telling her she should sell them in the shop.Butshe’s too modest.”

Pollyturns away to fill the kettle. “They’renot good enough to sell.Nowherenear as good as your soaps.”

“Neverhad any confidence in her own talents,”Gloriasays to me as ifPollyisn’t there. “Anyway,Martyhad this beautiful tartan bathrobe that we got on a trip toScotlandyears ago.Wouldhave fit you perfectly.”Sheruns her fingers around the edge of the placemat again. “Butwe donated his things to his favorite charity store.Theyrescue old farm animals.”

Pollymight not want to talk about him, butGloriaseems to.

“Wasit recently that you lost him?”

“Threeyears, seven months,”Pollychimes in before her mother can answer.

Sheputs the kettle on the stove with a clatter.

Glorialooks up at me with a faint smile and nods. “Wethink he was so stressed from the loss of the land that his heart couldn’t take it anymore.”

“Theloss of the land?”Ilook over atPollyand point out the kitchen window. “Allthe land over there?Thatyou said used to be part of the farm?”

Sheleans back against the counter and picks her fingernails. “Yup.Justover two hundred acres.”Shelooks up and meets my gaze. “Nowwe haveone.”

“Howcome you sold it?Youdon’t seem happy about it.”

Gloriarubs her wrists as if they’re painful. “Theymade it sound like a much better deal than it turned out to be.Itsounded like we’d get to keep this little corner of the land and be comfortable for the rest of our lives.Exceptthat’s not how it turned out.”

Sheadjusts herself in the chair.

“Therewas a clause in the contract that said the price the developer would give us would be halved if the council didn’t give consent for their plans by a certain date.Thedevelopers and the council all told us not to worry, there was no chance of it not going through by then, and it would be fine.Butit wasn’t.Theplans weren’t approved until a week after the date.”

Gloria’seyes well up asPollyjoins in. “Everyonethinks the councilmembers were in cahoots with the developers, that they got kickbacks for delaying the approval so the bastards could pay everyone less.”

“Martythought he’d allowed us to be taken for a ride.”Gloria’svoice cracks. “Henever got over the stress of it.Hehad a heart attack.Outthere with the goats.”

“Yup.”Pollyslowly slides her gaze from her mom to me.Hereyes find mine and lock onto them, burning into me like a laser. “Abunch of rich guys in suits swooped into town and took advantage of the locals.Thenthey went back to their office towers and billion-dollar companies, leaving behind a bunch of devastated lives.”

Well,Iguess that explains everything.

11

POLLY

Mompeeks overMax’sshoulder and grins at me as they hug goodbye.Hisfreshly laundered shirt hugs the contours of his strong, broad back.

Thishas been one of the most excruciating half hours of my life.Trappedin my own kitchen with someone who tricked me into thinking he was about to kiss me.Andsomeone who knowsIwould have let him.

Can’tbelieveIfell for it.

Ofcourse, he wouldn’t want to kiss me.Noone like him would ever want to kiss someone like me.HowcouldIlet myself believe that for a second?

It’sbeyond embarrassing.

Humiliating.Mortifying.All-consumingly shameful.

AllIwanted to do was shut myself in the laundry room till he’d gone.ButIguess he would have had to come in there to get his stupid shirt out of the dryer.

Momdid what she could to brush the dirt off his pants.Myeyes are drawn to his backside that’s still quite brown.Andstill exactly the size and shape of a butt you might want to sink your teeth into—if it didn’t have that thin coating of dried mud on it that might, or might not, contain goat poop.Andif it wasn’t attached to a community-wrecking, business-destroying, kiss pretender.

“Thankyou for cleaning me up,Gloria.AtleastI’mdecent enough to be seen in public now.”