Page 83 of Tempt Me
Goliath shook his head.
“Look, you can look into whatever you want, but good luck finding anything. The big cover-up you keep whining about? That wasn’t us who put the blinders on people.”
I waited for him to continue.
“It was the cops. But here’s a question for you. Instead of chasing dead ends and pretending to be someone you’re clearly not, why not just ask your boyfriend the truth? He was there. We all were.”
I pondered that.
“He’s not my boyfriend.” I snapped. “And Professor Masters wouldn’t tell me the truth even if I did.”
Goliath gripped the pen again, his tattooed fingers gliding down its length.
“You’d be surprised what that man has gone through for the people he loves.”
I blinked rapidly, my mouth falling open in shock.
“Love? You’re insane. Now I understand the blind leading the blind in this fucking nut house. The only thing your brother loves is keeping his secrets buried.”
Goliath ran his hand over his face, his big body looking crumpled in his chair. “Oh, Roe, don’t bury yourself with them.”
I tried to decipher his mumbling. The article said he was a father and husband. Was that who he tried to keep buried? Was their death his secret?
Or didhebury them.
Thirty One
Remorse: Sorrow sharpened by guilt.
Ican’t change my past...but maybe I can shape my future.
Watching Fallon through the glass as she held that little baby was surreal. I couldn’t help but see Ariah holding Xenia at that small, squishy age. The memories of toxic waste diaper changes, late nights of helping Ariah with feedings, and being a bumbling tool when it came to being a dad flooded my mind.
I was never a good father to Xeny. I always struggled, but god help me. She would just hold my finger with her little hand, and I felt capable of taking on the whole damn world to prove them wrong.
In the end, I was the one proved wrong. I failed Xenia worse than simply being absent or fucking up changing her properly…I got her killed. If I had stayed out of her life, she would be a beautiful eight-year-old girl now.
I should have watched her from the shadows like this. Anything I touched turned to ash. It had been my curse ever since I tried to save my brother. I only managed to get thrown in with him and drag Judas along for the damn ride. Ariah was alone. She lived alone and…died alone. Our beautiful daughter was fated to follow her because she was mine.
I had to stay the fuck away from Fallon. She could give that kid a good life if I backed off. She could put the asylum, the redheaded quack, and her dead brother’s now-dead girlfriend to rest. She would graduate college as the photographer she was, and I would cheer for her on the sidelines. At least then, she would be safe.
“What a sweet baby, Daddy!”
I looked in front of me on the other side of the glass. Xenia was smiling and cooing at the baby in Fallon’s arms, mimicking the rocking action with her toy boat in her grip.
“He is so cute, Daddy. Who is he?”
I tried to put on a brave face for my Xeny bug.
“Hi, Little Flower. That’s a friend’s baby nephew. She’s going to take care of him.”
Xenia was always curious. She giggled and walked closer to the baby, caressing his face with her translucent hand.
“You can help her! Be his Daddy. Then, I can have a baby brother.”
I blinked, trying to mask my surprise. “Uh, Xenia, that is a very nice thought, sweetheart, but this baby doesn’t need me.”
Xenia turned back to face me. Her beautiful smile fell, and a tear slipped down her tan cheek. She walked to the glass and held her little hand up to it. I mirrored the pose and tried to search her face for what was wrong.
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