Page 29 of Starting Over with You (Beer League Belles #2)
CHAPTER
TWENTY-SIX
Kenni
Me
You were right.
Sadie
As I tell Matt, I usually am.
Sadie
But tell me how I’m right today. I like the ego boost.
Me
Dean has been flirting with me.
She calls, and I decline it. She does it again, and then she’s rage-texting.
Sadie
KENNI!
Sadie
Why are you declining my call!
Sadie
Answer before I show up!
Me
I’m not home, or at Dean’s. Fuck. I can’t say this because then it’ll be real.
Sadie
Kenleigh, what the hell?
Me
Fuck.
She calls again, and I answer with my head on the steering wheel of my car while my heart slams into my ribs.
I just got a coffee from Noelle’s and she was wanting to chitchat, but I couldn’t.
I’m a fucking hot mess express of confusing thoughts and what-ifs.
This morning with Dean is all I can think about.
I can’t make heads or tails of it; all I know is what I feel.
I want Dean Moore.
“Kenni?”
“I’ve always liked him,” I admit after a moment, and I feel like I just jumped out of a plane without a parachute.
I love Sadie. I know she’ll talk me through this.
Though, I feel like I’m betraying Missy, and that’s the last thing I want to do.
But the words just spill from my lips like they’re seeping out of cracks I didn’t know I had.
“He was my first kiss, and no matter how many times I kissed someone else, it was his lips I thought about. Oh, and I did cry because he got Missy pregnant. I love Skyye and I’d never wish she weren’t here, but I wish it had been me. ”
“Oh, sweetheart,” she says quickly, and I’m thankful she didn’t let silence fill the line.
“I thought he was just picking on me like he did when we were kids, but he admitted to flirting with me, and there was no joke in his voice. He was serious.” I draw in a deep breath through my nose.
“He said he is glad I’m divorced, and that he wanted to kiss me that night at the Pine.
” She sucks in a breath, and I press my forehead harder into the steering wheel.
“But what if I give in to what I’m feeling?
And really, what am I feeling? Do I want to jump into another relationship? Or is this about sex?”
“I can’t answer that.”
“He’s your brother. I don’t even know how you made it through Missy getting knocked up by him.”
She laughs. “Girl, you need to talk to Missy about that.”
I furrow my brows, which hurts against the wheel. “What do you mean?”
“Not my story,” she says gently. “All I know is, I want whatever you want.”
“It’s so messy.”
“But sometimes the biggest mess can be cleaned up with the right person,” she murmurs, and I hate the tears that roll down my face. I brush them away quickly, my heart in my throat. “Missy won’t care. I promise.”
“How can you say that? It’s her baby’s daddy.” I cringe. “God, this sounds so Jerry Springer.”
She snorts at that. “It doesn’t. You’re thinking too hard.”
“But what about Skyye? Hell, my boys?”
“They won’t care,” she insists, and I want so badly to believe her. “Kenni, you’ve been through hell. Do something for you.”
“But what exactly am I doing with him?”
“That’s a question only you can answer,” she says softly, and I love her for being so patient with me.
She has always been the sounding board I needed when I knew Missy would just boss me around, the way big sisters do.
“I will tell you this—you’re the only one who has gotten that guy arrested twice, and he kept coming back to you.
I know during holidays he’d watch you, and if he had his way, he’d take out Stratfuck for you.
” I swallow the sob in my throat as she continues. “And I know he loves your boys.”
“I know. He walked in when the boys called this morning, and it was all so normal. Like the four of us just chatting. I didn’t even do that with Stratford.”
She makes a gentle noise of agreement. “Interesting, huh?”
I groan loudly as I press my fingers into my eyes. “What am I doing, Sadie?”
“Living for you,” she says almost immediately. “That’s the great thing about this being your life, Kenni. You get to direct the narrative. Do you want Dean to be a part of your story?”
Her question steals the breath from my lungs because the answer is a bright neon sign in my mind. “He is a part of my story,” I admit quietly. “He always has been.”
“A side character,” she offers with a grin in her voice. “Why don’t you upgrade him to a main character?”
I can’t help the giggle that spills from my lips. “You sound entirely too excited about this.”
She is quiet for only a moment before she says, “Because for me, it’s a story I want to watch play out. ”
Her admission hits me square in the heart.
I breathe in through my nose and squeeze my eyes shut as the tears leak out.
My story hasn’t been mine in nineteen years.
It was Stratford’s, and then the boys’. And I love that my boys have been the stars of my story, but now they’re living their best life, and I have the chance at real happiness.
A happiness that could include Dean…
That’s a plot twist that could turn into one hell of a love story.