Page 25 of Sinner (Legacy of Kings #1)

CHAPTER 24

X ander

In the cataclysm of my life, the one comfort I’d gotten had been when spending time in the forest. Almost everywhere I’d lived, woods had either backed up to the property or had been within walking distance. What I hadn’t liked were parks, usually avoiding them. Being deep in the woods was my escape from mental and physical torment, allowing me the fleeting feeling of freedom.

Parks and their inhabitants were sick reminders that my life was anything but normal, the random acts of abuse finally shutting down almost every emotion but rage.

Very few niceties had brought anything like peace of mind.

Not the expensive cars I’d purchased, nor the clothing hand tailored for my frame. Even the house I’d painstakingly selected and decorated only allowed for comfort from time to time.

The Blackwell Group? Well, the business did provide purpose and in the early days of the Obsidian Society, a hint of the now ancient feeling of satisfaction. Even that had disappeared, which was the very reason I’d started looking for the right candidate to fulfill my toxic fantasies.

I certainly hadn’t expected my ex best friend’s daughter. There was so much fucking baggage in allowing our twisted connection to continue. Yet as of this moment, I was experiencing the same rush I’d had only during the times I’d taken a life. There was something almost magical, ethereal about holding a man’s life in my hands, sometimes literally.

Somehow, every one of the experiences paled in comparison to fucking Jessica. Now she was curled up under a blanket in the chair I’d ordered her to sit in, her feet curled under her as she stared at the fire I’d built only moments before.

I sensed she had so many questions, ones that I wasn’t prepared to answer. In a way, she’d placed her trust in me. Perhaps I didn’t deserve it. I took a gulp of my drink, wishing the liquor would burn the back of my throat. Then maybe I could remind myself I was a man, not a monster.

Was that even possible given the heinous deeds I’d done?

As strange as the thoughts were, Jessica made everything seem possible.

She’d barely touched her drink, almost never blinking. The quiet between us meant nothing yet was everything to me. The woman wasn’t peppering me with questions and I’d seen the look in her eyes. She knew I was her Sinner. Maybe at this moment I should also be considering her my saint.

Or perhaps my salvation.

The weight I’d felt regarding Shanna had been tremendous over the years. I’d used the Obsidian Society to rid myself of the urges I continually had. Yet it was no longer working. That was the real reason I’d hungered to be a participant and not just a judge.

I found it interesting that I was thinking about salvation when I was still furious with myself I hadn’t ended Dorn’s life. He’d been given a reprieve only because Jessica had been mostly aware of what was happening. When she’d slipped into unconsciousness, a protective side I’d never known existed had taken over. Did I really think the man was stupid enough to take out his frustrations on her after my warning?

No, which meant bringing her here had been entirely selfish.

It was an interesting turn of events.

I took a sip of my drink, realizing she’d turned her attention in my direction.

“Did you love her?” she asked.

She’d already heard the answer, but needed confirmation. “As much as a man like me is capable of.”

“She mourned you.”

“I know.”

“She suffered, which is why she took her own life.”

“I know.”

When she exhaled, the sound was rattled. “Maybe I should hate my father.”

“You’re lucky in so many ways, Jessica. I never knew my father. Maybe I didn’t want to given the man I’ve turned out to be. Your father made mistakes. We all have. But he’s blood. I’m not.” I shook my head. Since when had I done a decent damn thing in my life?

“But he lied to me.”

“He had his reasons.”

She rested her head on the back of the chair, once again staring at the fire.

Another fifteen minutes passed. I refreshed my drink, returning to sitting on the edge of my seat.

“Who developed Dark Nights?” she asked as she pulled the blanket tightly around her slender shoulders.

“It was a collaboration, my brothers working with me. An idea that came to us almost ten years ago, but until the advancement of AI, it wasn’t feasible to try and put into a development phase.”

“So the computer can actually read a player’s thoughts.”

I laughed at her suggestion. “God, I hope not. No, but with the inclusion of the artificial intelligence module, it can anticipate moves and study past choices in a split second, which allows the player to have a catered to them experience.”

“How very dangerous.”

“So you’ve said. You fared well.”

“Because I’ve designed games. I know what to expect.”

I nodded. “Yes, and you’re very talented. Elizabeth mentioned several of your ideas she’d like to place into version two.”

The news seemed to please her, but the only way I knew was by the flash of delight in her eyes. I wanted her to smile because when she did, the entire room was lit up. I took another sip of my drink, noticing she was shivering even under the thick throw.

“I keep reminding myself they’re just games,” she said in a way of trying to convince herself.

“Isn’t the entire world one big game? When you walk into a sales meeting or a boardroom, you’re trying to outwit your opponent, calculating his or her moves prior to them acting. That’s how you beat the computer and the AI-generated being you seem to abhor.”

She laughed halfheartedly. “I guess I never look at the art of doing business that way. I suppose you’re right. But I don’t necessarily hate the AI addition. I just wonder how intuitive the thing will be.”

“As intuitive as you allow,” I admitted. “Some players will have a clear advantage just like in life. Once a lead is taken, the hungriest survive.”

The way she looked me in the eyes was an act of defiance, but more than that, she was already calculating her next move within the confines of the darkest game of all.

Escaping my control. While I was eager to see her manifest into the darkest side of herself, I also had no intention of allowing her to win. That just wasn’t acceptable.

“You’re cold.”

“I’m always cold when I’m nervous.” She dragged just the tip of her tongue across her bottom lip.

“You have no reason to be nervous around me. Contrary to everything you believe, I only have your best interest at heart.”

“Are you certain about that? Do you have any idea what my father would do if he knew the two of us had been intimate?” She shuddered visibly, but I could easily tell she was forcing a reaction. Her mind was torn, the betrayal of her body haunting her.

“I suspect Michael would be understandably angry. However, this is your life. Not your father’s.”

“True, but you know my father well enough to know he enjoys acting as if he’s the only savior in the world. What really happened between the two of you? Is this all about Shanna?”

“It’s a subject I don’t like to talk about. We had our differences over the years. They began to escalate. When I dared date his daughter behind his back, things began to unravel. You can use your imagination from there.”

“You know what’s funny? Or maybe I should say tragic? He was so angry with you and still is. But I can tell he misses you. He never really talked about the two of you when you were younger. I have a feeling he didn’t want me to know because you two were hellions.” Her snort was the cutest thing in the world.

Her comment made me laugh once again. It felt good to do so. I rarely did. “On a scale of one to ten, I’d say we were a twelve.”

“I knew my father had some wickedness inside of him. He told me once my mother tamed him, although it took several years. I wonder if that was really true.”

Michael had been a good guy, too good to spend time with a bastard like me. “Your mother had a powerful influence on him. But as with all levels of darkness, the shadows never leave. They only remain dormant.”

“How profound and I’m certain you’re right. No one is eternally good.”

“That’s my belief.” It was interesting she was doing her best to justify not only what had occurred between us, but the manner in which she both played and hungered for the games.

“I wish I’d known my mom. I heard she was an amazing woman.”

She leaned forward as if she knew very little about her own mother. I guess she wouldn’t given how young she’d been when her mom died. Maybe that had been the true beginning of the end to my relationship with Michael.

After all, he’d blamed me for her death just like he had with his daughter, Shanna. I was an asshole, but going three for three would gut him.

“You knew her.”

“I did,” I admitted. There was no reason to lie.

“Was she anything like me?”

The question was a reminder of just how much older I was. Granted, I was much younger than Michael. I couldn’t remember exactly when, but I’d met Michael the first time when I was seventeen, scraping by on the streets while hustling for money and food. He was at least twenty-five, maybe older. It was funny how certain details just never mattered.

He’d grown up privileged. I was nothing but a throwaway. Yet our connection had been tight from the beginning. He’d already been married at that point with a four-year-old daughter. Even thought he’d been heavily involved in a family life, I’d managed to monopolize much of his time.

It was perhaps the one thing I was least proud of. Well, that and how I’d surrendered to his one demand that I now regretted.

“You’re very much like her. Innocent souls.” Perhaps I was testing her.

She huffed and turned back toward the fire, huddling even more. “You don’t know me that well, even if you think you do. Although I’m certain your background check of me found all my secrets.”

“Evidently not all of them.” I wondered why she hadn’t mentioned her sister earlier, other than that she’d been dead set on deceiving me. Had she really thought she’d be able to act out on her need for revenge? I’d heard they were tight, but given how Michael had felt about me dating Shanna, I’d almost never come to the house.

Another reason Jessica’s identity hadn’t been detected.

“You know enough to scare me or maybe I should say use against me.”

“You already know about my reputation, Jessica. You assume everything you’ve heard is correct. Most is, but I’m not in the habit of using anything against beautiful women.”

“That’s right. You’re a protector.” The words dripped of sarcasm and she shivered again. “I don’t know what I’m doing any longer. I want so much to hate you. Why can’t I continue doing so?”

“Because I’m a great guy.” I grinned to try to break the tension. At least she rolled her eyes instead of showing fear in them as she’d done before.

“Why don’t I run you a bath.” I wasn’t asking a question. I was making a statement.

She sputtered and bent her knees, pulling her legs against her chest, leaning her head on her knees. “A bath? Are you serious?”

“Believe it or not, the house comes with running water.” I placed my drink on the table and stood.

“Stephanie warned me about you,” she said absently, reiterating the point from before. There was no reason to elaborate or grill her on why. Her gaze lifted seconds later. “But she’s wrong.”

We locked eyes for a few seconds and a part of her armor began to slip away. Some of mine did as well. Somehow, after all the years of fighting the demons inside, she’d managed to crawl under my skin next to them. My increasing pulse reflected not only the intense desire, but also emotions I wasn’t used to experiencing.

I wanted to learn more about her, to spend quality time exploring both her body and her mind. The thought was riveting.

“Don’t go anywhere, my sweet Desdemona, or I’ll be forced to keep you in my cage for the night.”

“You have a cage?”

I laughed. Little did she know just how deep the depravity went. “A cage isn’t your style, Jessica. You need to run free to be hunted and captured by a predator.”

“Mmm… Maybe.”

Her laugh followed me to the stairs. I took them one at a time, still questioning my judgment of bringing her into my private space. Everything I’d done over the last two weeks had been out of the ordinary even for me. I could even consider my behavior reckless, which was something I’d fought hard against most of my life.

A smile curled across my lips as I headed into my bedroom and the adjoining bath. While creature comforts were nice, including the hand-selected leather furniture, my favorite design in the house after the kitchen renovation was the master bath. It still carried a gothic feel with fixtures and the walls painted in a rich wine color.

Had I indulged in taking a bath every so often? Yes, but for entirely different reasons than simply relaxation. I’d bathed in the blood from a night of righting wrongs. As I turned on the water, I realized until the asshole in the parking lot, my hunting had been reduced to a minimum over the last year or so.

Why?

I’d been too busy.

Jessica had managed to ignite the darkness that I would never allow to be driven into the shadows again.

I turned on the flameless candles while the tub was filling and moved to the sink as I waited. My reflection told no lies. My eyes highlighted the anguish and retaliation over the years. There was no light indicating a soul whatsoever.

A single solid look into someone’s eyes and they were usually terrified. Not Jessica. The reasons to lay final claim to her were stacking up against those that I should consider releasing my hold.

But I was a possessive man, more so as I’d gotten older.

I rolled one hand down my chest, pleased at what the years of working out had done for my physique. Never again would I be the wimp, the weak boy who couldn’t fight to save himself. I was a lethal killer and proud of it.

Steam was rising, the water the perfect temperature.

Now it was time for my guest to enjoy another taste of my world, one she seemed to covet more than her own.

She was still in the same position as when I’d left her, only her eyes were closed and her head was placed against the back of the chair. I stood over her, admiring her beauty in the firelight before sliding my arms underneath, gathering and holding her close to my chest.

Her face appeared angelic, her skin luminous. Even her lips were rosier than before, plump and perfect for kissing.

For biting and drawing blood.

I chuckled inwardly. As if I was a vampire. That was one sport I wasn’t interested in. Shedding blood was one thing. Drinking it entirely another.

She stirred as I walked up the stairs, her eyes opening if only briefly. But she was aware of her surroundings. She knew she was in the predator’s lair.

And she loved it.

“What are you doing?” she whispered as she tilted her head.

“Enjoying your company.”

Once inside the bathroom, I took a deep breath of the light strawberry scent of whatever shower gel she’d used, my entire body filling with desire.

I placed her on her feet, cupping both sides of her face as the blanket pooled around her feet. “Wake up, little lamb. It’s time to be cleansed.”

Jessica opened her eyes after hearing my command, her long eyelashes floating across her porcelain skin in a provocative way. I allowed myself to be transfixed by her beauty for a few seconds while she awakened.

Without being commanded, she stepped away from the blanket, gingerly placing one leg into the water as if testing the temperature. Once satisfied, she dipped her other, gripping both sides of the massive claw foot tub as she lowered herself into the water.

The slight wince on her face pleased me, an indication the round of punishment she’d all but begged for had been effective. My cock twitched at the thought.

She remained sitting upright, perhaps getting used to the hot temperature. Her lower lip quivered and she was blinking rapidly. Perhaps everything that had occurred was playing out as if the events had just happened.

I lowered onto my knees, reaching around her and grabbing the scrubby ball and shower gel. Citrus with a hint of the ocean. Not quite the right scent, but it would need to do until I purchased more seductive products. As she rolled her shoulders, wrapping her arms around her knees, I marveled as the thoughts of bringing her here again filtered into my mind.

Was I really thinking this was something other than what I’d intended it to be?

Jessica sighed as I poured the gel, closing her eyes once again. She was unfolding another layer of trust, determined not to allow her anxiety to win. As I began to slide the scrubby ball down her back, she uttered a slight moan.

The sound echoed in the room, my balls tightening from the sound. The act was more intimate than any sexual encounter I’d experienced. I also found it soothing, something the beast inside of me craved and rarely found.

I was shocked when she started humming. While I had no idea the tune, the lilting sound was unlike anything I’d ever heard. Beautiful if not haunting. Only a few seconds later, another strange and very elusive feeling washed over me. I wanted more than just her body.

She sighed once again. I leaned her back so her head was resting on the tub pillow attached to the side. Her eyelids opened, her lips pursed, and her entire face was glowing in the flicker of candlelight.

“Beautiful,” I told her as I rubbed the ball down her long neck. She truly was, her hips and breasts rounded to perfection. As she parted her legs, bending one knee, I took a deep breath and was able to catch a strong inhale of her desire.

My cock was fully aroused, making the moment somewhat painful. No other woman had done this to me.

I kept my eyes locked on her as I rolled the ball around one nipple then the other. She shifted in the water, her breathing more ragged than before. “You’re not the man I expected you to be.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

She tilted her head to the side and I wanted to capture this moment, to take a photograph that I could indulge in after she’d gone.

If I let her go.

The thought brought another smile to my face and I stood, returning the scrubby ball to its holder.

“I’ll leave you to enjoy,” I told her. How would she react?

“Wait,” she whispered before slowly turning her head.

“Yes?” I’d already turned as if heading for the door. The air between us was as heavy as before, but for an entirely different reason. I concentrated on her labored breathing as I rubbed my hand across my aching cock. The need to bury my shaft inside of her was growing stronger by the minute.

“Xander. Please…”

“Please?”

“Join me.”