Page 113 of Shifting Hearts

“I heard him a few times during my life. He warned me one time when Cassandra wanted to kill me. She ordered Bibi and Babilon, the first pair of werewolves that made it. They were like my children. There was a time she was scared of me, and she ordered them to do it. He warned me, I heard him and I killed them. Another time when I just wanted to die as killing them was the final nail in my undoing. My cup shattered that night, but Cassandra didn’t want me to die.

She must have had a change of heart or mind.

Saw that I wasn’t a tread anymore, that she pushed me over the edge.

He counted off all the horrible things I had done during that time.

I thought it was one of the human’s we killed, toyed with, that became my conscience.

I didn’t know it was him. And the last time was in the shed.

He spoke to me the last time. Told me I was so powerful when I finally asked him who he was, and he made me a promise.

” I looked at Annie and she sighed with relief.

“You heard him.” Irene said. “Why didn’t you look for us when you discovered….”

“I thought it was hallucinations, Irene. I saw you too.”

“When?”

“Right about now, whatever he was seeing now. It was after that beating. A vampire took me to the nearest hospital. They treated me and when I woke up, I went back to that coven. Cassandra wasn’t happy to see that I was still alive and she threw me into the dungeons.

I don’t know how long I was down there, but I saw you.

We spoke for a while. My fever must have been sky high that time. ”

She touched my face and looked at me and then smiled softly. “I want to see.”

“No, you will never…”

“Oh but I will. You forgot how I see. Starting from the end and working my way to the beginning. That was part of the beginning and if I still talk to you that time, I will still be myself. Your darkness might not be as dark as you think, sweetheart.”

“No, it is. Believe me it is. I can’t lose you like that.”

She hugged me again.

“Please don’t.”

“I told you I won’t unless you want me to.”

“How many times did she beat you.” Annie was adamant.

“Not a lot, but a few times and it was never as bad as that last time. I hardly had any scars.” I answered Annie’s question. “But don’t worry, she regretted doing that at this stage.”

“She told you that?”

“No, she told me that wolves did that.”

“Wolves, you said you didn’t remember.”

“I didn’t. My back never healed after she changed me. It was a constant reminder to her artwork.”

Her eyes were as round as orbs as she stared at me.

“Alex told me that wolves don’t leave those types of marks.

It’s a beating tool that does. I never even asked her straight out.

Scared for what she might do to Alex for telling me that, so I left it.

But a part of me always knew that somewhere before I became the monster, someone did that to me.

I hated wolves so much because of what I thought they did to me as a Nightling, and it turns out I had no reason to hate them at all. ”

“It’s what she does, she lies. Some monsters never learn.” Annie sounded furious. Silence lingered for a few short moments.

“I want to see.” Irene looked up at me. “Your back, I want to see it.”

“Please, you don’t need to see it.”

“I want to see it too,” Annie said.

I stared at both of them

“Please, give me that at least,” Irene begged.

I sighed and looked at the ground. I felt so defeated. I bent over and felt how Irene lifted up my shirt.

She gasped but didn’t say a single word.

Annie got up and came to look too. She left out a grunt. “She is dead, and it will be a slow death this time.”

“Annie.”

A soft hand touched my back. I hated anyone seeing it. Not even Paul or Em has seen it.

Her hand left my back and she pulled down my shirt.

I looked at her as she wiped tears away, trying to push back the rest.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, knowing this caused the woman that was my mother so much pain.

“No, you have nothing to be sorry about. Jason and Dom were supposed to be at that coven, not Alex and Leigh, Leigh and Mel saw it. I will never forgive her for that, never.”

I sighed as Annie went over to hug Irene who started to cry softly.

Gabby told me that in the bathroom and I still wondered what would’ve happened if Jason showed up at that coven.

Saw Adrienne still alive. He would’ve tried to kill her and I would’ve stepped in cause I hated Jericho, and him realizing that it was me, Adrienne would’ve known, she would’ve known that I wanted to be a vampire for him.

“I would’ve killed him if it was him and not Alex and Leigh.” I spoke softly. “Maybe that is what she saw, Irene. She just protected his life.”

She sniffed hard and both women looked at me.

She touched my face. “I wish that was what she saw. You wouldn’t have killed him.

He would’ve broken Adrienne’s hold on you and you would’ve come home with us.

You would’ve remembered who you were faster than what you had.

That was why she was scared of my touch. ”

“Wait you even see the visions?”

She nodded.

Her seeing eye was really that strong.

“No secrets, sweetheart, remember, I have a very important role in the pack’s life.”

I remembered that, but I never witnessed it.

How many times did Mel see me? I remember seeing her at that restaurant. She didn’t look as if she knew me, she smiled at me friendly. Whose face did she see?