Page 111 of Shifting Hearts
FIVE
JASON
T he first two years of her jumping back were brutal to witness.
At first, when she spoke to me so often, I almost believed she could see me.
I let myself hope. But then I realized she wasn’t talking to me, not really.
She knew I was gone. She was only entertaining the idea, keeping herself company.
And yet, I loved it. Loved pretending she was speaking to me. It didn’t feel so lonely.
She broke every rule. She made peace with her brother, even told him what he was. She showed him the cages, those few hidden in the Free State, and he finally believed her. She fixed their bond, stitched it back together like only she could.
Then, just as she once said she would, she graduated and went backpacking through Europe. My chest ached when she reached Italy, so close to me without knowing it. She never knew about the property there. Instead, she slipped onto a freight ship bound for the U.S.
She had no abilities. Nothing to shield her. Still, she whispered to me at night before sleep, confiding secrets as if I could answer. I wished she could feel me, see me, but I knew she never would.
When her food and water finally ran out, she scavenged in the gray dawn, stealing what she needed before crawling back into that crate of toys to hide. I didn’t know how she did it. I would have lost my mind being cooped up that long. But she was losing hope. I could feel it.
At last she reached U.S. soil. She leapt from the ship, swam to shore, changed into dry clothes, and survived in shelters, trading odd jobs for scraps of food. She kept telling me in the dark how hard it was. Now, I saw it with my own eyes.
She searched everywhere, every place she thought might lead her to me. Evading authorities more than once. I understood why she went to Steven. But sitting through it, watching her in that diner, his gaze crawling over her like she was prey, twisted my stomach.
I saw him leave. Saw him make the call. And in that moment, I realized just how fucking stupid I had been. Nobody knew about that diner. About our arrangement. I should have gone the second he phoned.
Instead, he took her to Adrienne’s coven. When I saw her again, red irises burning in her eyes, my blood boiled. How could Steven kept this from me? It was the worst betrayal.
“You should leave,” I whispered, lying beside her on her bed. She couldn’t hear me. “This isn’t the place for you.”
Heaven knew how badly I wanted to touch her. To tell her she wasn’t alone. That I still knew her. That I never stopped loving her.
She never made friends, but one vampire noticed her. Sonia. She was young, maybe Dom’s age, but old enough to carry herself among humans. Still, her eyes burned red, proof she fed from them. Something about Morgan drew her in anyway. Maybe she saw someone she’d lost long ago.
“You don’t belong here, Natasha,” Sonia told her. “Why are you doing this? Why do you want this life?”
Morgan huffed a small laugh. “I never wanted it, Sonia. I need it.”
“Need it for what?”
She never answered.
“Stay away from Cass,” Sonia warned. “For some reason she hasn’t noticed you yet.”
“I need her to notice me. Otherwise, she won’t change me.”
Sonia’s growl was sharp. “You don’t want this. It isn’t a life, it’s a curse. It’s lonely.”
Morgan touched her arm, soft. “It won’t be lonely. I need immortality, Sonia.”
“Why?”
“You wouldn’t understand. It’s the only way.”
Sonia stormed out, but I could still feel Morgan’s fear. Her pulse thundered every time she saw their speed, their strength.
The missions dragged longer, harder. Sonia formed an alliance with Reeves to stave off the boredom. It wasn’t love, just survival. But she asked him to look after Morgan. Natasha, as she called herself.
And he did.
Still, Morgan couldn’t kill. She couldn’t even help with the killing.
There was a brute of a boy and a cruel girl who clearly ruled this batch, the champions, always chosen to deal death.
When they noticed how Sonia and Reeves seemed to favor Morgan, they hated it.
They started running to Cassandra with whispers behind Reeve’s back.
Reeves managed to talk his way out each time, shielding Morgan without making her a target, but Cass was beginning to notice her. And then one night, she gave the order. Timothy and Luka were to ambush her.
They beat her so viciously I could do nothing but watch. The helplessness burned. I already despised this life, and it had only just begun.
Lena, the Den’s mother, was the one who found her, cleaned her up. I didn’t know her, meaning that she had died a long time before we found them.
The ones we saved that night, those forced into this brutal duty, they weren’t here anymore. Still, I wished I could thank her, for what she did for Morgan.
“This isn’t a life for you, child,” Lena whispered, stroking her hair. “You are so gentle. I’m with Sonia, you should leave.”
“You know I can’t,” Morgan whispered back. “It’s almost over. Just a few more months.”
Lena’s eyes filled with tears. “Not everyone gets changed, my child.”
Morgan frowned. “What?”
“Only the strongest. You can’t kill. You’re too gentle. Reeves and Sonia can only lie for you so long. Cass will see the truth. And those two, Timothy and Luka, are exactly what she wants. They’re already loyal. You need to leave.”
I saw the tears welling in Morgan’s eyes. She hadn’t even realized the truth until then.
“I shouldn’t have said that,” Lena whispered, voice trembling. “I could be punished for this.”
“I can’t leave,” Morgan said, choking back the tears. “She’ll hunt me down. She’ll kill me.”
“You won’t survive here either, unless you’re a Watcher.”
Morgan blinked. “What’s a Watcher?”
“A witch,” Lena said softly. “A rare one who doesn’t even know what they are. Cassandra would change them in a heartbeat, whether they wanted it or not. Do you have one of those hidden somewhere?”
“She has twenty-five,” I muttered bitterly. “They’re just not awake yet.”
Morgan only shook her head.
“Why did you come here, child?” she asked.
“I had no choice,” Morgan whispered. “I ran out of time. I need immortality.”
“It’s a curse,” Lena said, her voice sharp with grief.
“It’s not.”
“You’re sick, aren’t you?”
She shook her head.
Then Lena stilled. “Is it… for love?”
Morgan’s throat worked as she swallowed. Her voice broke. “Yes.”
Lena’s eyes softened. “He’s a supernatural, isn’t he?”
A tear slipped down Morgan’s cheek.
“Morgan,” Lena whispered, “the only immortals are wolves. And wolves are vampires worst enemies.”
“He’s not a wolf,” Morgan said, barely audible. “He’s something else.”
Lena closed her eyes, then opened them wide. “Hybrid?”
Morgan nodded, resting her head in Lena’s lap. For the first time, she was telling someone about me.
“How do you know about them?” she asked.
“Stories,” Lena murmured. “Rumors. Cassandra once had a coven of mixed races, long ago.”
“She did?”
“Yes. Adrienne, Morgan.” I wished she could hear me, so badly.
Lena’s voice cracked. “She had a Varcolac at her side once. He ruled with her. But eventually, he left. Some say he grew a conscience, that he couldn’t stand her darkness.
That’s why she became a vampire, to bind herself to him forever.
But once she turned, he wanted nothing to do with her.
Don’t ever tell her you seek this life for a hybrid.
Her jealousy, her obsession with them, it’s as twisted as she is. ”
Morgan nodded faintly, not realizing how close Lena’s story came to the truth. If she had, she might have left then and there.
“I hope he is vicious,” Lena whispered, her hand trembling in Morgan’s hair, “and that he knows how deeply you love him, child.”
Morgan’s voice was soft, but steady. “He does.”
“Does he know you’re here?”
She shook her head.
“Is he looking for you?”
Another shake of her head.
“Does he love you, Natasha?”
Morgan’s eyes closed. “Yes. Very much.”
“Then maybe he’ll come.”
“He’s not coming.”
Lena frowned. “That doesn’t make any sense.”
“Don’t try to make sense of it,” Morgan whispered. “Just know it’s strong. It’s true. And if I die here, then maybe one day he’ll know how much I loved him. And that it was she who killed me. He’ll have his vengeance.”
Lena sighed, grief and pity weighing in her eyes.
“I’ll make sure everyone knows how much you loved him.”
“They can’t know.”
“Not the vampires, child, the Den Mothers.”
I froze, breath catching. That’s why Esmerelda had said those words to me, back when I freed them.
I had thought she was speaking of something else entirely.
She had been so old then, frail and sickly, barely tasting her freedom before she passed.
But before she died, she told me she knew I would come, and that she hoped my wrath would be enough.
Enough for what? I never understood. I searched for answers, but she was gone before I could ask, and no one else knew the story Lena had promised to pass on. It died with Esmerelda.
Hot tears blurred my vision as I crouched beside Morgan. Her face was battered, one eye swollen shut, bruises blooming across her skin, her lip split and bleeding.
“I love you,” I whispered, voice breaking. “And I promise, when the darkness takes hold of you, I’ll remember.”