Page 112 of Shifting Hearts

SIX

NATASHA

W hen I returned the heaviness returned with me.

Irene hugged me. I missed her almost as much as I missed Jace.

She touched my face. “It’s going to be okay.”

I didn’t want to argue, even if I didn’t believe the way she did. Nothing would ever be okay. He would wake up, and set me free.

Gaby hovered like only Gaby could, so I slipped into Jace’s room and sat with Dom for a while who was next to his bed.

We started talking about everything.

About the years I tried to find them. My human years.

The coven. I told him about Sonia and Reeves.

About Lena, my Den Mother, who was probably long dead by now.

She was the only one who ever knew the truth, the only one who promised she would pass it down to her children, that I loved him, that I was desperate for immortality, and everything I endured just to try and become a vampire.

Even though none of us thought I’d survive it.

I never told anyone about my abilities back then. Cass would have demanded proof, and I had none to give. So I endured whatever pain and humiliation she dealt me. But Lena promised. And I still don’t know if she ever kept that promise.

“Wait,” Dom cut in. “Was she old?”

“She’d have been dead a long time ago. She was already in her seventies when I was human. I think I was Blaze when she died. I had no respect for humans then, so I never paid attention to how she died. For all I know, I could’ve killed her myself and not even realized it.”

Another blood tear slid down my cheek, and I wiped it away.

Dom’s voice softened. “No wonder you’re feeling the way you do. But Irene’s right, Morgan. We all go through this when we’re trying to find ourselves. We’ve all done horrible shit. Jace and Annie were evil once, too.”

“They didn’t have fire,” I muttered.

“It didn’t make them less sadistic. If Jace had taken you on, you would’ve seen he’s not as fragile as you think. He just chose not to be that monster anymore. And it took him almost a thousand years to get there. Longer than it’s taken you.”

I swallowed. Dom had seen Annie’s life. He’d seen Jason’s, too. He knew.

“How was their time with Adrienne, Dom?”

His jaw tightened. “It still gives me nightmares. I thought I was part of that coven, that’s how real it felt. I know what she’s capable of, Morgan. What she can do. I saw it when she broke Jace, when she controlled him like a puppet. He knows her better than anyone.”

“It’s going to break him,” I whispered. “I thought I loved her once. Thought she was my one and only.”

“Hey,” Dom said firmly, “you gave him that choice. It’s not on you.”

I nodded, though my chest still ached.

Then Dom’s eyes narrowed. “She kept her promise, Morgan.”

“Who?”

“Lena.”

I shook my head. “No, Dom. I just told you, it wasn’t her.”

“Not Lena,” he corrected. “Esmerelda. She kept it. She just didn’t tell the story to her children.”

My breath caught. “What?”

“The story died with her. She probably didn’t realize how important it was, or didn’t believe it would matter. We didn’t know.”

“Didn’t know what?”

“That they were talking about you.”

I stared at him. My voice broke. “Me?”

“When we destroyed that coven, we found the Den Mothers with the new batch of Nightlings. Jace couldn’t kill them, they were humans, so he let the Nightlings go.

But the Den Mothers, we set them up in France.

Gave them a life of peace, made sure they were okay.

It’s still one of our projects, making sure they had freedom. Esmerelda was in her nineties then.”

I frowned. I didn’t even remember an Esmerelda.

“When we flew them to France, showed them their new home,” Dom’s voice cracked, and I saw tears glisten in his eyes, “I’ve never seen anyone so happy to be free.

To live without someone forcing you to do things against your will.

I didn’t know what that felt like myself, so I couldn’t understand it.

One of the younger daughters called us to her, and she led us to Esmerelda’s room.

Annie was so gentle with her, like the grandmother she never had.

And Esmerelda told us she knew we would come.

That we would free them. And she hoped we would find a little peace in the vengeance we got. ”

I stared at him, silent.

“Jason thought at the time it had something to do with Alex and Leigh. That the Den Mothers knew she wouldn’t let them leave, wouldn’t let you go.

But it wasn’t that. It was this story. Gabby was the only one who saw it.

She really knows you, Morgan. And Jace refused to believe it.

He was so adamant he would’ve forgotten you. We were so naive.”

I shook my head. “Dom, I was sure you would’ve forgotten me. Not knowing who I was. The fact that all of you remember, that alone is a mystery.”

He gave me a small, sad smile. “Sure, some would call it impossible, Morgan. But you were that powerful, and Gabby was the only one who remembered. We all failed you because we never listened to her. I hate her ‘I told you so.’”

“Stop, please,” Jason begged suddenly, and both of us jumped.

Dom rushed to his side while I froze, watching him stir in the bed. I could feel it, my darkness creeping over him, raw and suffocating.

I looked at Dom. He was unsettled, torn between confusion and worry, completely on edge.

“Dom,” I whispered, voice tight with panic. “What is it?”

He shook his head, not meeting my eyes.

“Don’t… please,” Jason murmured again, writhing slightly, a low “no” escaping him over and over.

“Dom?” My voice rose, panic threading through it.

“This never happened before, Morgan. It’s real, but not this real.”

I clawed at my hair. “It’s my darkness. It’s too much.”

Dom’s voice was firm. “It was his choice, Morgan. Go get Annie.”

I bolted for the door, flinging it open as I screamed her name.

Annie and Irene were the first to reach us, Richard, and Bobby right behind.

“What is it?” Annie’s hand touched my shoulder, grounding me slightly.

“It’s Jason,” I said, my voice trembling with terror.

Annie followed me inside, Irene close behind.

I gave them space. Richard and Bobby went back downstairs as Irene and Annie just stared at Jason, experiencing the lock pass on a completely different level.

“Do you understand why I didn’t want him to lock on me. This is my fault. I’m doing that to him.”

“Shhh,” Irene hugged me. “It was his choice. It’s not your fault, sweetheart.”

“Stop please.” He begged louder, it was so clear.

“What do we do?” Dom asked her.

“I don’t know.” She climbed on the bed next to him and held his hand.

“What are you feeling?”

“He’s afraid, terrified, and frustrated that he can’t do anything.” She looked at me. “What is he seeing.”

“What do you think he is seeing Annie? It's my life. My life as that monster.”

He growled which made Annie jump off the bed and then he turned on his stomach, crawling onto all fours.

Irene gasped.

“I swear I will find you and kill you slowly.” He sounded so sadistic.

Irene held me tight against her and then he cried out as thin red lines appeared on his back.

“What the fuck?” Dom asked as Annie stared at Jason in horror.

He grunted the second time, clutching the bed’s railings.

I couldn’t see his face as he was facing the wall, and more lines appeared on his back.

“What is this?”

I looked through squinted eyes at the picture before me.

The third grunt came which was a bit louder than the second and the red lines started to bleed.

“No!” I knew what stage he was. It was when she beat me to a pulp. It was twenty lashes with the cravats. The reason why my back looked like it was molded by a bear.

“How many lashes did she order, Morgan.”

“Lashes, she beat you,” Irene demanded.

“It doesn’t matter.”

Blood started to seep out of his back, and his cries were starting to drive me insane.

“Get me rugs and water now,” Dom ordered.

“Get her out of here,” Annie yelled, pushing me and Irene out of the room as she went to get supplies.

Irene took me into the opposite room and we sat on the edge of the bed.

I still hear his screams as she holds me tight in her embrace.

“Shhh, it’s over.”

“It’s not over. I still hear him.”

She pushed me slightly away, frowning at me as Jason growled and screamed.

“You can hear through sound proof walls?”

I nodded as blood tears filled me eyes and she pulled me into her shoulder again, covering my ear with her shoulder and the other ear with her hand.

It was finally silent as I sobbed in her chest. How was any of that possible?

It didn’t make any sense why he was experiencing any of that.

The door finally opened and Annie walked in. She looked drained, had tears in her eyes and Irene finally uncovered my ears.

Annie just stared at me. “How many lashes did she order?”

“Is he okay?”

“He will heal. Now answer my question please.”

“Twenty. I know now that she wanted to kill me that day. She constantly asked me why I needed to be a vampire but I never answered her and it infuriated her just more.”

Irene’s eyes were closed as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“He wanted to protect you.”

“Why would anyone try to do that?”

“He is going through a second lock pass Morgan. He would die for you and it might just become a possibility. Nobody experienced a lockpass like that before.”

“Don’t say that, Annie?” Irene said.

“You saw that. He is trying to save her life. He knows what this is. He can’t do a fucking thing but he is still trying?”

“He did save her life. All of us know that those twenty lashes should’ve killed her. No human can endure that. He softened some of the blows that day that saved her life.”

“How, Irene, it happened a fucking long time ago.”

“How do we remember her, Annie, how is any of this possible. She changed the past. It doesn’t matter how. It’s Morgan and it’s your brother. I’m glad he did that, cause she wouldn’t be alive today if he didn’t.”

“I heard him too?” I said.

They both looked at me.

“What?”