Page 29 of She’s a Big Deal

Though it was not good news, it did not immediately hit home for Olivia, and she actually maintained a surprising, staggering amount of optimism. Some may have called it denial. Whatever . Grace let her down so gently that it was easy to fool herself. Her lover was so careful with her, in fact, that Olivia woke up after a short and mostly sleepless night, convinced there was still hope for the relationship. Again, she would give her time and space. Grace would come to her senses. She would change her mind. Simply had to, right? A full week passed. Then, another. Grace did not call again. When Olivia bumped into her sister in town and learned from Chloe that she had flown in and out for a crucial meeting with the resort team, the bubble finally burst as all her hopes were crushed. She was right here? Grace had come to Burlington to see her people, but she had not told her. Had she intentionally not driven the short distance over to Red Falls? Maybe she had, Olivia figured, to visit her aunt. But not me. Not me... It was like a giant hand squeezing her heart. As reality sank in, inescapable, it hurt enough to make her want to sob. Olivia did manage to keep a straight face in front of Chloe, but she decided that a workout and a trip to the supermarket were more than she could handle. She drove home.

“I didn’t think she meant it. I thought she’d just… God, this can’t be happening again!” She vented to her puppy as he licked her face in sympathy. “I don’t want to lose her.” Now, a spark of anger flared. “Especially because she’s so damn wrong!”

Looking up, Olivia was startled to spot the last person on the planet she wanted to speak to at the moment, getting out of her car in front of the house. She considered running out the back door to avoid her, but it would be stupid. Knowing Charlie as well as she did, the older woman would just chase her into the yard and all around the block if she had to. Ridiculous. So, Olivia swallowed her tears. She put any further breaking of her heart into a million pieces on hold for the time being and went to let her friend in.

“Hello, darling.” Charlie hugged her tight, kissed her on the cheek, then beamed a smile and penetrating glance at her. X-ray eyes that missed very little. “I thought you might be up for a cup of tea.”

“Um, you know, not really. I was just—”

“I brought you some,” Charlie informed as if she had not spoken. She took off her coat and hat and threw them on the back of the couch. “Pukka. Soothing chamomile. Yes?”

Olivia sighed, figuring resistance would be futile as she was already heading to the kitchen. “Fine.”

“I just spoke to Grace,” Charlie announced.

“Yeah?” Though she would have loved to be able to shrug it off, tell Charlie it was all the same to her, and actually feel that she did not care, Olivia’s wounded heart rallied well enough to produce a jolt. “Hmm… How is she?”

“In a hell of a mood.”

“Well, what else is new?”

Charlie chuckled. “Did you know she was in town?”

“No.” Olivia admitted the truth to her, miserably. “I had no idea until I bumped into Chloe, and she mentioned it.”

“When was that?”

“Just now. I just got home.”

“Ah.” Charlie nodded as if a bunch of things suddenly fell into place for her. “You know, she didn’t come to see me either. Said she was in a rush, lots of work, blah, blah, blah. Of course, I see right through her bullshit. She didn’t come because I would have made things difficult for her. Olivia, darling. Tell me what happened.”

“We broke up.” Her chest heaved painfully as she said the words. Dammit, it hurt so much. “We—” No, this wouldn’t be accurate, would it? “Grace broke up with me.”

“Proof that a whip-smart woman can be a magnificent fool as well, sometimes!” Charlie declared with a massive eye roll.

“I agree.”

“Don’t cry.” Charlie hugged her again, sounding very much like Grace when she was issuing commands. ”Just let me make you a cup of tea, and we’ll talk. Okay?”

“If you want. But I hate tea. And I don’t know what talking about it is going to achieve.”

“Coffee, then.”

“Charlie—”

“Ssh. Hush now, my girl, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.”

“It will be,” Charlie assured her softly, affectionately “Trust me; I know Grace.”

“So do I.” As they sat, Olivia blew air out in frustration and a good dose of heartbreak. “I know her very well. She’s so damn stubborn!”

“Did you tell her that?”

“Of course. Obstinate, like a stubborn mule.”

“Good for you.” Charlie smiled as she sipped her tea. “Bet she enjoyed that.”

“I think she did, actually. Go figure.”

“Sure. And it’s clear as day.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Her girlfriend, Miriam. You know, that young woman was very smart as well, and definitely no pushover. On the contrary, I think she was very good for Grace, the way she tempered her fiery streak somehow. Miriam never hesitated to stand up to her and tell her when she was pushing it too far.”

“I didn’t realize you knew Miriam.”

“Grace is like my child, so I made it my business to know, darling.”

“Did you know she was gay?”

“I always suspected. Anyway, I am telling you this because I do believe that Grace has been waiting her whole life to find a woman like Miriam. One she clicked with on a deeper level, and who would not be afraid to call her out on her bullshit.”

“Ah.” Olivia just shrugged. Sighed again, deep and hard.

“I believe this woman is you, darling. She told me she never knows what to expect with you.”

“Like this is a good thing?”

“Well.” Charlie flashed a complicit wink this time. “She did make it sound like it was a great annoyance and irritation to her, but that’s just for show. Do you know, in all these years, she has never invited anyone home? Or even spoken fondly to me about another woman?”

“Sadly, we’re done now,” Olivia muttered in rising sadness. “And I’m sorry, Charlie, but this feels weird, talking about Grace when she’s not here.”

“I’m talking to you, darling.”

“But it’s over, okay? God. I don’t want to cry again.” Olivia stood up to pace. “I just need to get over it. And I will. I knew what I was in for. To her credit, she never made any promises, never said we would have more… Now we’re done. Finished.”

“Don’t accept it, Olivia.”

Olivia chuckled at that. Bitterly. “You know, not accepting things, holding on to relationships, has got me in huge trouble in the past. Charlie, I won’t be doing that again. Learned my lesson, thank you very much.”

“Are you in love with her?” Charlie inquired softly.

“No,” Olivia snapped as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“Olivia—”

“ No, ” she repeated, knowing it was a lie. “I’m just… No.” Not in love, don’t want to be in love. No way!

“You are.” Charlie nodded. “Oh, baby!”

“Don’t say that to me. Don’t baby me. Why do you look so happy, anyway?” Olivia struggled not to sound impatient. “Do I really need to say it again, Charlie? Grace told me we can’t go on. She doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me. Or anyone. Ever. I don’t know why I got it into my head that there was still some hope, but—”

“Because you understand her on a deeper level, of course,” Charlie interrupted with another convincing nod. “You can hear the things she’s not saying.”

“I’m getting a headache.” Olivia raked her fingers through her hair in more irritation. She sat down again, exhaled, and shook her head. “She was kind. Gentle, but very clear. And it has been more than two weeks without any contact. She’s moved on.”

“Don’t let her.”

“What?”

“Don’t accept it. It takes two to break up, right? She can’t do it without you.”

“Charlie, you’re talking crazy.”

“Make her commit, Olivia. It’s time.”

“But she doesn’t want to! And she’s already in the wind!”

“No, she’s not. Go get her. Remind her of how you feel. Have you even told her? Uh?”

“There’s no point.”

“So you’re just going to take it lying down?” Charlie rubbed a gentle hand over her shoulders. “That’s not like you, kid. Look, Olivia. Grace is scared. You see that, don’t you?”

“I’m not going to beg.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“But it would be. You know, Dana is right. I need to learn to accept that sometimes things won’t go the way I want them to. And that I am strong enough to face the truth on my own.”

“Done.”

“Huh?”

“Well, yes. You’ve learned it. Demonstrating that to me right now. Lesson learned. You’re in control.”

Well, she did have a point. Olivia relaxed a fraction as this dawned on her, then revved up again.

“I know Grace went through a lot. I do understand her, yes. I know part of her is still hurting and grieving. And though it hurts me too, to know this and not be allowed to help her, it’s not my job to heal her.” Glancing at Everett, it struck her. “She’s not a puppy who needs rescuing!”

“Well. Okay.” Charlie nodded, stood up, and dispensed a quick hug. “I’ll leave you to it, then.”

Olivia let her walk halfway to the door before she threw her arms in the air. “I mean, what am I supposed to do?”

“Tell her the truth of how you feel, at least. It doesn’t have to be tearful, and you sure don’t need to beg. But you should tell her straight, so she knows exactly how it is.” Charlie smiled softly, warmly. “Olivia; don’t make it so comfortable and easy for her to walk away from you, darling. It should be hard. Really hard.”

Olivia sat on her own after Charlie went home, feeling low-key angry and resentful. And stunned. She had worked hard to rebuild herself and her self-esteem. To learn to be okay on her own again. And now, this? Charlie’s advice was the complete opposite of what Dana had told her. A little voice whispered at the back of her mind… Now it's up to you. Only you. What are you going to do?

◆◆◆

It was great to see what some regular talk sessions with a good therapist and a demanding job to keep him challenged could do for a willing man. Grace reflected on all this with satisfaction as she returned to her office after a quick lunch with her brother. Reece had already acquired a nice tan. He was letting his hair grow a bit, which suited him. He was running early mornings before work and losing some of the weight he’d put on after months of booze and inactivity. His work ethic was impeccable of course, as she thought it would be, and he was fast making friends around the office. It was not even a bit strange for Grace to have him on the team. Reece was doing well. Life was good. Or so she told herself, repeatedly, several times a day.

“Ms. Michaels?” She turned from her panoramic window to face her assistant. “The representatives from No.5 are on their way up.”

“Show them in when they arrive. Then hold my calls and all other business.”

“Absolutely.” Libby allowed herself a grin and two thumbs-up. “Good luck!”

Grace did not require any luck; she was fully prepared, as always. Still, she did appreciate the sentiment and favored her assistant with a quick smile of her own.

“Thank you.”

Managing to wrangle this meeting with the elusive board of No.5, a string of, indeed, five luxury boutique hotels in the heart of Paris, was an achievement in itself. Grace liked France and she would love to do business there. Convincing the owners of No.5 to let her handle their design requirements would open a door for Brazen Inc. onto the rest of the European market. The UK. Spain. Italy! Grace had prepared ferociously for the upcoming presentation. There was also the added bonus that it helped to keep her mind off of her personal life, and Olivia. Though Grace told herself that she had made the right choice in letting her go, it still hurt. And every day, it seemed, a little more. The woman was hard to forget. Still. It was better than feeling out of control. At least, hurting was nothing new.