Page 41 of Settling the Score (The Karma Club #4)

‘Please, stop,’ she begged, trying – and failing – to channel her friends’ inner-strength.

He was quiet, his lips forming a mutinous line.

‘I’m grateful for this week. I’m grateful for seeing you again, for talking to you. I think we both understand each other so much more now, and whatever we were back then, our relationship deserves that.’

His jaw throbbed visibly.

‘I understand why you left. I even understand why you cut me out the way you did. But I’ll never trust you again. I don’t want to trust you. Don’t you see, Aiden? You hurt me because I let you. I gave you my heart, and that gave you all the power. I’ll never do that again.’

‘But this week?—’

‘Has been sex. Not for one second have I wanted anything more from you than that.’

He blinked, like he couldn’t quite make sense of that.

‘I’ll never trust you not to hurt me, even though I understand it wasn’t your intention.’ She sobbed. ‘And without trust, what kind of love is there?’

‘Sienna.’ His voice was rough, as if dragged from deep inside him. ‘I’m not the same guy I was then.’

‘Nor am I. I’m completely different. You broke me, and I’ve turned myself into someone else. Someone different. Stronger.’

‘Sienna,’ he groaned, taking another step forwards.

‘No.’ She moved away from him again. ‘It’s over, Aiden. Once and for all.’

‘Don’t shut the door on this.’

She made a deranged sound. ‘You did that. The door has been closed ever since. This week doesn’t change a damn thing.’

‘It could if we wanted it to.’

‘But I don’t. I want to go back to my real life, and forget all about you.

The thing is, none of it really made sense to me.

I couldn’t understand why you left. Why you didn’t answer my calls.

But now I know, now I understand, and I’ve had a chance to make my peace with it, I think I might actually be able to forget about you.

’ Now it was Sienna who put a hand to his chest. ‘It really is over, Aiden. And for the first time in a long time, I’m okay with that.

’ She forced a smile. ‘I’m more than okay.

I’m finally free.’ And then, she turned her back and walked away, before he could see the tears streaming down her cheeks.

* * *

A bridesmaid could hardly desert the wedding, even if she was completely and utterly mentally spent, so she took a scant few minutes to tidy up her face, settle her nerves, chug half a glass of bubbly before rejoining the reception, focusing all of her attention on Chuck Daly, who’d become unwittingly, the newest recruit to the Karma Club.

It helped to have something concrete to focus on.

To think about getting revenge for Paige, finally. The last ex the club had to seek revenge on.

Because, she supposed, they’d done what they’d set out to with Aiden.

Ridiculously.

Having days ago given up on the very juvenile idea of making him want her and then walk away, in the end, that was exactly what had happened. Only it hadn’t just been fun and flirty. It hadn’t been harmless. She could say with absolute certainty that her rejection of Aiden had hurt him. Deeply.

She believed he did, in fact, love her on some level.

Maybe he always had, but not enough.

Not enough to make it work.

Not enough to even try.

What if something happened in a year’s time, where he had to choose between Sienna and something else?

Another predicament where he felt like he had to leave her?

She’d never feel safe with him. She’d never feel secure.

Because she’d felt both those things in the past, she’d felt totally lulled into a false sense of security, and he’d ripped it right out from under her.

Bouncing back from that had been no mean feat.

‘So, what do you think?’

‘I think your last name should be Machiavelli,’ he said with a carefree grin, and no idea that Sienna’s never-fully-recovered heart was currently experiencing fresh stress fractures. ‘That’s a pretty well-cooked plan.’

‘Well, I had help,’ she assured him. ‘There were a couple of other evil geniuses at work.’

‘Hmm.’

‘So?’

‘I’m willing to help you,’ he said quickly.

‘It doesn’t cross the line, as far as I’m concerned, and God knows the bastard deserves it.

’ Having heard the full story, which Paige had authorised Sienna to share, Chuck had been a very serious, very angry version of his usual self.

‘Why don’t we have lunch next week, to go over the finer details? ’

‘Erm, because I won’t be here next week.’

He laughed. ‘No, you’ll be in Ashbury Falls, right?’

She was surprised he remembered the name. ‘Right.’

‘A place I’m dying to see after hearing Aiden’s five-star review of it.’

She rolled her eyes. ‘Funny, the tourism board went a different direction, in the end, to asking him to be spokesperson.’

‘Funny,’ he agreed, with a wink. ‘I’ve got business nearby. It’s no hassle to come to you. You can buy me a burger in the local diner.’

‘Ha. I happen to work in the local diner, I can probably score you one for free.’

‘Ah, I always love a girl who can hook me up with a freebie.’ He leaned forward and squeezed her hand, then slipped a business card over the table. ‘We could go for a run afterwards?’

‘It’s too hot for a run at lunch time.’ She pulled a face.

‘Fine, we’ll make it dinner.’

‘I’m not running after eating a burger.’

‘Shame.’ He grinned. ‘I’d like a chance to whoop your ass again.’

She rolled her eyes. ‘You wish.’

He shrugged, then looked over her shoulder. ‘Someone’s waiting for you.’

She turned, glancing in the same direction. Aiden was hovering a couple of feet away.

Her heart stammered then pounded into her ribcage.

Her smile slipped.

Not because she didn’t want to see him, but because it was all so heart-hurtingly hard.

‘I’ll see you next week.’ He kissed her cheek. ‘It’s been nice meeting you, Sienna.’

‘You too.’

Sienna sat very still, composing her fluttering nerves, until Aiden came to crouch beside her, his face wearing an expressionless mask.

‘Hey,’ she said, a little self-conscious and breathy.

‘Hey,’ he repeated. ‘I wanted to say goodbye.’

She glanced at him sharply then.

‘I’m going to hitch a ride with Blake and Astrid tonight, rather than leave in the morning.’

Sienna’s jaw dropped. ‘They’re going on their honeymoon.’

‘Yeah, but the boat’s taking them to Athens first. I’m going to stay there – not with them, obviously – then fly out in the morning.’

‘Oh.’

‘I’ve got negotiations, and stuff…’ He tapered off.

‘But that’s not why I’m leaving, and after last time, I’m going to be completely honest with you.

’ He swallowed hard. ‘I just can’t be here with you.

Not because I don’t want to be, but because it’s too hard.

Being near you, loving you, knowing how much it’s never going to happen. I need to get away.’

‘I get it,’ she whispered, closing her eyes. ‘It’s how I’ve felt for years, but I could never get away from you. You were everywhere I looked. Every nook and cranny in Ashbury is the beginning and end of our love story. You’re everywhere, even when you’re nowhere.’ Her eyes glazed over. ‘I get it.’

‘This is so fucked up,’ he muttered, but stood, face resolute. ‘I’m sorry. If you don’t believe I love you, at least believe that. Please.’

Her mouth gaped. She nodded. ‘Okay.’

‘Okay.’ He reached down, as if to touch her shoulder, but pulled his hand away at the last second. She thought she heard him swear again. ‘I’ll see you—’ He broke off with a shake of his head. ‘Goodbye. Just… please take care of yourself.’

She nodded again.

He turned and walked away, and not ten seconds later, her three best friends in the whole world descended on Sienna and wrapped her in a huge hug. She didn’t need to be the only one taking care of herself. She had the girls, and she knew she always would.