Page 13 of Second Chances (Passion and Perseverance #2)

Chapter Seven

“ Just breathe, Beth, just breathe ,” she repeated over and over to herself.

She’d rushed home after her meeting with Caroline, praying that Darcy hadn’t made it there before her; she had a plan and having him beat her home would spoil it. His flight had landed half an hour ago, which meant that he could walk through the door any minute.

Throwing her briefcase into his study, she dashed into the bedroom, heading straight for her designated underwear drawer.

This time when she opened it, she went for one of the new items that she’d passed over before.

Quickly sifting through the rainbow-colored options, she pulled out an ice blue lace teddy. That will do perfectly.

Beth quickly discarded her clothes and shimmied into the slip of lingerie, reaching around to hook the clasp as she turned to assess the result in the full-length mirror.

Wow.

The teddy had a plunging, lace-up front which made her relatively smaller breasts look more attractive; the clasped back had a large cutout and the high-rise style transitioned into a thong, accentuating her hips; the blue flattered her paler skin and highlighted her rich, brown hair.

Boy, was he good at this - never in a million years would she have thought that this style of lingerie would look good on her, but it did.

She tried not to think about how much practice he must have had doing this type of thing for God-only-knows how many other women since his last serious relationship.

Don’t go there, Beth. There’s no time.

Pulling away from the mirror, she hurried into the bathroom and quickly tousled her hair, returning to the bedroom and climbing onto the massive bed. Taking a deep breath, she was about to reach for her phone, realizing that it was nowhere to be seen, when she heard the door to the apartment open .

“Beth!”

She heard Darcy yell immediately. His voice seemed a little off though. Maybe from the stress of flying. She heard his luggage dropping on the floor, keys crashing onto the table.

“ Beth!”

She heard him yell again as she heard his heavy footsteps stalking quickly around the apartment.

Something was wrong. She heard it in his voice and it wasn’t just stress.

What could she have possibly done? Looked like her plan was not going to go according to plan.

She quickly sat up and had one leg off the bed when the bedroom door slammed open, Darcy stalking inside.

“Fuck, Beth—,” he began, stopping short as soon as he saw her.

Her mouth parted and she gasped at the expression on his face; anger and fear exuded out of him. His appearance was wild - hair a mess, tie loosened around his neck, shirt partially undone. She was shocked, her mouth moving but no words came out. His mouth thinned, his eyes flamed with caged anger.

“Why didn’t you answer your phone?” he asked, the calmness in his voice only emphasized how close to the edge he was.

“What?” Beth replied; she couldn’t think. She’d barely processed him, why was he asking about her phone?

“I called you. When I landed.” He spoke in broken sentences, as if he could only control himself for those short moments. “Why didn’t you answer?”

“What do you mean?” she stammered, “I don’t know; I was in a meeting and then I rushed home because I wanted to be here when you got back; I wanted to surprise you.

And I was running late and I was afraid that I wasn’t going to make it and when I did then I wanted to change and put on something that you had bought me and…

” She stopped only because she’d been talking so fast that she had run out of breath; she put her hand to her head, panting as she tried to sort through the jumble in her mind and continue .

“Fuck,” he said hoarsely, taking a good look at her, just then realizing how she looked and what she was wearing. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he said again harshly as he ran his hand roughly through his hair.

“What’s wrong? I don’t understand,” she managed to plead, finally finding her legs to stand off the bed and take a hesitant step toward him.

“Don’t,” he said, putting up his hand as if to stop her. “What the fuck is wrong with me.”

She saw the change in him, the anger had turned to shame and self-hatred; she’d seen the combination before - it was every time he tried to push her away because he felt that he didn’t deserve her.

“Darcy, please,” she implored, “it’s ok; I’m ok.

What happened? What’s wrong? You can tell me.

” She paused for a moment, waiting to see if he would respond.

His hand was rubbing his jaw, his head barely shaking back and forth.

Beth saw that he was fading away from her so she reached out and grabbed the hand meant to stop her, “I’m sorry I didn’t answer my phone. ”

He let out a harsh laugh and went to pull his hand away except she grabbed on tight and pulled him towards her, startling him as she placed his hand over her heart.

“Please, talk to me. I love you,” she whispered almost imperceptibly, staring into his eyes.

“God, Beth,” he groaned as he stepped to her, clasping her face with his other hand, his mouth finding hers .

She’d expected his kiss to be rough from anger or hunger or both except this time it was so tender.

His tongue gently grazed over her lips, asking for access to her mouth, which she willingly gave.

He wanted to take her; she could feel the passion, the hunger leashed behind his kiss, but at the same time, it was like he needed this kiss even more than he needed to fulfill his desire.

Beth didn’t know how long they kissed for, everything, including time, seemed to stand still; neither his body nor his hands moved, all of his energy was focused on that kiss.

She didn’t know what was going on, but she poured her heart into the kiss, hoping that he could feel every ounce of love that she had for him, hoping that he could feel that she was there for him.

When his lips finally left hers, they moved only a fraction of an inch away as he rested his forehead on hers.

“I thought you left,” he said quietly, his voice thick with pain. “I thought you left me when you didn’t answer.”

Oh, God.

“And then I got home and you were nowhere and I didn’t see any of your bags by the door. You didn’t answer when I yelled.” His voice trembled. “I thought you were gone.”

How could she have been so stupid? He had told her that his previous girlfriend would just up and disappear on him and what had she done?

Oh, just made it seem like she’d done the same thing.

You didn’t do it on purpose. Of course not.

She’d been so focused on getting back before him that she hadn’t checked her phone since meeting with Caroline.

When she got home, she didn’t want to leave a mess so she’d moved her things into the study, making it look like she wasn’t there, and then when he did get home and called to her, she’d purposely ignored him because she’d wanted to surprise him.

Of course, none of it had been on purpose to concern him, except that he’s been conditioned to expect the person that he cares about to leave him, with no warning, no notice, no care.

She saw clearly how her actions could easily have given that impression and her heart broke; she’d never wanted to give him this kind of pain.

His thumb brushed under her eye and that’s when she realized that a tear had slipped free .

“I’m so sorry, Darcy,” she said thickly, looking him in the eye, “I can’t…

I didn’t mean…” God. There were no words to convey how sorry she felt for putting him through this torture.

So, she decided on a different route. “I’m here,” she said, reaching up slightly to briefly kiss his mouth, “I’m not going anywhere. ” She kissed him again. “I love you.”

“God, Beth, don’t apologize,” self-hatred re-infusing itself into his tone. “I’m the one who is fucked up. How could I even think that of you? What kind of person am I, to treat you like this?” With those self-loathing and rhetorical questions he began to pull away from her, disgusted with himself.

Beth quickly wound her arms around his neck, forcing her body flush with his.

“You’re a human being who has been traumatized, but I’m here; I’m not going anywhere.

I would never betray you like that. So, please, don’t pull away from me; don’t let this come between us.

I didn’t leave you. I won’t leave you. So, don’t leave me. ”

With that statement, she reached up and covered his mouth with hers.

It took a moment - a moment for him to register what she had said, to register that she was giving him a chance to put her above his past, to change the outcome of the situation but when he did, it was like a switch was flipped and suddenly he was groaning into her mouth, his arms coming around to press her closer against him.

Thank God.

This kiss was much different from the last; the deep appreciation and desperation for her was clear. Their tongues danced, trying to deepen the kiss - if that was even possible. Beth moaned as she felt his erection against her stomach.

Take control, she heard the small voice inside her head say.

Her hands worked their way between them to finish unbuttoning his shirt and yank it down off his arms. Pulling her head back, she looked Darcy in the eye as she moved them backwards towards the bed.

Holding his gaze, her palms came up to his chest as she pushed firmly and said softly, yet assertively,

“Lie down. ”

His eyes flared in a momentary thought of defiance; he was unused to being ordered around, especially in the bedroom.

His mouth thinned as he stared at her, the instinct to take control fighting to be released.

She stared right back, daring him to retaliate, yet knowing that he wouldn’t - not this time, at least. A small smile spread across her face as she felt him give way beneath her hand, slowly sitting down onto the bed.