Page 50 of Save Me

“Fuck it,” I cursed as I turned off the burner and tossed the spatula into the sink. I faced them all again. “It bothers me that you all had a conversation about sharing me without me. None of you thought to include me in the decision-making or asked me if I was alright being in a relationship with all of you.”

They were all clearly stunned.

“Did you discuss fucking me, too?” I questioned.

That snapped them out of their stunned states and Colt and Creed both said “no” at the same time. Knox smartly stayed quiet. Keelan looked from me to Knox as if he held the answer to what was happening.

“So none of you talked about halting all intimacy with me because the four of you assumed I can’t handle it right now?” I asked.

I was answered with silence.

“Wow.” My voice cracked. “Am I really that pathetic to you?” How could they not see me that way? I’d just had a meltdown in my closet yesterday.

“What?” Creed shook his head. “No.”

“Then why don’t you include me when it involves me?” I asked.

Again, I was answered with silence.

“I’m not someone who needs to be managed or told how things are going to be because the four of you think you know best. If that’s what you expect, I can’t do this,” I said and moved to leave.

Colt quickly blocked me. “We just didn’t want to add any pressure on you.”

“None of you have made me feel pressured in that department,” I said. “But you’d know that if you talked to me.” I could read what Colt was going to say next and I spoke first. “And before you say that I haven’t been the easiest to talk to, that was when you were trying to get me to talk about not sleeping. I have never avoided talking about our relationship. In fact, I have asked you to talk to me about it.” I looked at Creed. I’d asked him at Ethan’s party.

“What about what we discussed the other day?” Keelan asked in a calm voice.

“You couldn’t trust me not to use you?” I asked him. “Life is supposed to have give and take. In my case it’s almost always take, but my time with any of you, be it intimate or just being in your company, has been the only give life has allotted me. I wasn’t going to ruin the one fucking good thing I had.”

“Have,” Creed corrected.

“Had,” I repeated. “You made me feel like I don’t have a voice in this relationship. What’s good about that?” I walked around Colt and headed back to Knox’s room. I stuffed everything that had fallen out of my bag back in and grabbed my anklet tracker, which I’d left on Knox’s dresser yesterday. As I went to zip my bag shut, I felt my regular cell phone vibrate from somewhere inside.

I quickly dug around to retrieve it. Of course it was all the way at the bottom of the bag. The lock screen lit up, showing I had a text message from an unknown number. I clicked on the message and my heart stopped.

I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE.

15

I ran out of the guys’house, my bag bouncing against me each time my feet hit the ground. I hit the unlock button on my key fob as I ran toward my car.

“Shiloh!” I heard Creed yell, followed by the sound of shoes pounding on the ground behind me.

I whirled around. “Stop!”

He froze about a few yards from me. “You can’t just leave, Shi.”

Colt came outside next and walked briskly toward me.

“Please stay back,” I ordered with my hand out. I looked out at the street, searching for any sign that Mr. X was nearby. The hair on the back of my neck had been standing up since I’d seen the text.

“Why do you look scared?” Colt asked.

I looked back at them. If they knew, they wouldn’t let me go. If I stayed, he’d kill them to get to me. “I need some space.” I took a step back.

“You don’t need space. We need to work through our shit,” Creed snapped as he took a step forward.

“Please just give me some time,” I begged as I took another step back.