Page 39 of Ryder: Shadows and Desires

It’s immensely comforting.

He laughs and doesn’t let go of me. “Gotta admit, people usually compliment my shoulders.”

I laugh harder and pull away, looking back at my house, but I actually do feel better. Am I so pathetic that a simple hug works?

I appreciate how Ryder makes me smile, though. A pleasant shiver trails my skin when he slides his hand off my back. The frayed emotions want more, but I don’t push it. I don’t even know what we’re doing.

Since when does he hug me?

“At least you’re funny,” I say, trying to move things along.

“Sarah always needed the laugh.”

“Sarah?” My heart sinks, thinking it’s an ex he’s hung up on.

Oh, wait, I never confirmed if he’s single or not. Of course he’s not! He always smells good and has places to be.That doesn’t matter, Julie. You’re on his team, and he’s being nice to you right now.

“My sister,” he clarifies.

Oh... he clearly has a niece, but for some reason, I never saw him as having siblings.That’s right. There’s a whole identity that he wants to keep private.

I wipe my tired eyes, and I feel like I need a nap. At least I hadn’t worn make-up today, so no streaks of black.

“My charger, clothes, underwear, shoes, make-up, everything is inhere. And I can’t even take my car to go get things,” I state like a confession.

“If you need to go shopping, we can, but I am sitting in the truck.”

A big grin spreads across my face, and somehow, even with all my stuff ruined, my chest doesn’t feel nearly as heavy. I finally look at him, that rugged, handsome face directed right at me, his full attention mine.

“You’ve been really nice to me the last few days.”

He moves his gaze back ahead, making an expression as if to say,”yeah, you got a point,” and then chews on his lip. “You proved yourself, and you work well with me—”

His phone rings, and when he answers, it’s clearly Andrew.

As I sit there while the two discuss logistics, it hits me that I’m going back to a house where Ryder’s also sleeping. Am I going to see him at night? Does he sleep with his shirt off? Can I even handle my confused heart and broken spirit while being in such an intimate setting with Ryder?

I snort.

I’m being silly.

Do I seriously think we’re going to flirt,while living with Andrew? Anything more than flirting is gripping at smoke. Ryder is off-limits, completely.

He’d never cross such a line, either.

He’s madethatclear.

My tone swiftly changes, however, as we both near his truck while he’s still on the phone. It’s like he’s acting with little thought, sucked into discussing something related to New York. While deep into making some kind of point, the damn man opens the passenger door for me. He stares at the ground with his hand on the door, chewing on the inside of his lip as he listens to whatever the head coach responds with.

I quickly climb into the clean truck, placing my belongings on my lap, and he shuts the door behind me.

Is that what he’s like when his defenses are down? A true gentleman?

If there’s one thing I know for certain, it’s that if a sinkhole can’t kill me, then my thoughts on Ryder certainly will.

J U L I E

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