Page 26 of Ruthless Desires, Vol. Two (Ruthless Desires Series Extended Editions #2)

Oliver

I’m pretty damn familiar with panic attacks. There was a point when I was having them on a near-daily basis, so I know the signs. But never in the fourteen years that I’ve known Elliot have I seen those signs on him. He’s always been the stable one—the one you could rely on no matter what.

Taking his trembling hands in mine is as heartbreaking as it is unsettling. I don’t think I’ve seen Elliot this distraught since Sammy’s funeral.

“I’ll find another way,”

he says again in between short gasps.

“The only thing you’re gonna do right now is focus on me,”

I say calmly.

“You feel my thumbs rubbing your hands?”

It takes him a second, but he nods.

“Good. That’s good, Ell. Now tell me what you smell.”

He has to take a deep breath or two, which is an added bonus.

“Vanilla. I… I smell you.”

“What’s going on?”

Rhett asks as he reenters the room. He drops the blueprints onto the table before cautiously crouching next to me.

“He’ll be okay,”

I say.

“Take one of his hands.”

Rhett does, his frown deepening.

“You feel Rhett’s callouses?”

I ask, guiding Elliot’s fingers over the rough parts of Rhett’s hands.

“Y-yeah.”

“And what color is Rhett’s shirt?”

“Black,”

Elliot mutters.

“Yeah. Can you find some other things in here that are black? Maybe take a deep breath while you do?”

Elliot inhales slowly as his eyes search the room.

“The vase. The picture frame. The—I don’t want her to die, Ol.”

“She’s not going to,”

I say soothingly.

“Look at me.”

When his gaze returns to mine, I reach up with my free hand and wipe away his tears. That panicked look is still in his eyes.

For a couple minutes, I direct his attention toward anything other than his thoughts. I have him pick out objects that are different colors and textures, which is something he’s done for me thousands of times.

It’s unnerving to have the roles reversed like this. Elliot has always prided himself on being our rock. Seeing him like this has doubt creeping through my mind.

Does he really think we can’t do this? Or is all the stress finally too much for him? It was bound to happen eventually.

Wren comes back with the glass of water I asked her to get. As she sets it on the coffee table, she casts me a worried look.

“Thanks, princess.”

I give her a reassuring smile.

“Ell, can you take a couple more deep breaths for me?”

As he does, I squeeze his hand.

“That’s it. And you see Wren? Look at her. She’s okay. She’s safe, and we’re not gonna let anything happen to her.”

“But what—what if…”

“No what ifs,”

I say softly.

“Not right now. Just focus on us.”

I take one of Elliot’s hands and place it on Rhett’s chest.

“Feel his heartbeat?”

With a nod, Elliot closes his eyes and sighs.

“Count each beat,”

Rhett says as he holds Elliot’s hand in place. It’s one of the few things he’s usually able to do that can help me get through a panic attack.

“One,”

Elliot mumbles.

“Two. Three… I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m not supposed—”

“No apologizing,”

Rhett says.

“Not for this, Ell.”

He shakes his head.

“We need to make a plan. Aubrey—Wren—I’m sorry—”

“Shhh,”

I soothe as I stroke his hair.

“Wren, c’mere.”

Once she’s close, I place Elliot’s hand in hers.

“Keep counting.”

He starts from one again. Wren brings his hand to her lips, kissing his knuckles gently. My hope is that having us all close like this will help Elliot feel supported, but it might overwhelm him, so I keep a watchful eye on him.

Thankfully, having Wren near seems to calm him down more. Within a couple minutes, Elliot’s breathing steadies out, and he doesn’t look so disoriented. When I think he’s ready, I hand him the glass of water. He takes a couple slow sips before his head dips forward.

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened. I’ve never…”

“It’s okay,”

Wren says. She’s on her knees, his hand still clasped in both of hers.

“We understand.”

Blowing out a breath, Elliot’s eyes land on Aubrey.

“How long do you have before you have to leave?”

“I’ve got all day,”

she says gently.

“Don’t push yourself.”

“Ell,”

I say cautiously, already knowing he’s going to hate what I’m about to say.

“I think you should give it a rest. We can come up with a plan while you let yourself relax.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Please, Elliot?”

Wren asks as she looks up at him.

“I’m worried about you.”

He laughs tiredly, and tears begin to well in his eyes again.

“I’m worried about you.”

“But you can take a break,”

I urge.

“We can update you on everything we learn.”

“I can’t.”

Rhett’s fists clench at his sides. “Ell—”

“I can’t,”

he repeats, and his tone holds no room for argument.

“If I stop, I’ll just go right back to where I was. It’s either move forward or drown in all this anxiety, so I’m moving forward, dammit.”

There’s a beat of silence before Rhett nods. “Fine.”

“Can you tell us what you were thinking of that set you off?” I ask.

With a grimace, Elliot pulls his gaze back to Wren.

“I was thinking that it makes the most sense for Wren to break into the safe during the wedding reception.”

She gulps but does her best to put on a brave face.

“Because no one will think of me as a threat?”

Elliot’s hand slides from Rhett’s chest to cup Wren’s cheek.

“And you’ll have a plethora of believable excuses for being in that part of the house. Since it’s so close to the bedrooms and you’re in the bridal party, you can easily claim that you’re grabbing something for Aubrey.”

“Except Wren’s a horrible liar,”

I interject.

“I can learn,” she says.

“We have what, two weeks until the wedding?”

I ask.

“That’s not much time, princess.”

“I can do it,”

Wren insists.

“I want to help.”

“It’s dangerous.”

Elliot’s thumb skates across her cheek.

“I can’t let anything happen to you, love. We wouldn’t be able to come with you. If something went wrong, how would we know? We wouldn’t be able to protect you.”

“It’s more dangerous for you than it is for me,”

she counters.

“And as you already pointed out, I’ll have justifiable reasons to be in that part of the mansion.”

“I can try to get more details on what security will look like during the wedding,”

Aubrey says.

“I can play it off as wanting to inform my family about what to expect, which I’d prefer to do anyway.”

“That’d be helpful,”

I say, watching Wren’s eyes flare with hope.

“If we know how many men will be watching that part of the house and where exactly they’ll be, we can probably figure out a way to get you in and out without being seen,”

Rhett tells Wren.

Elliot shakes his head.

“But if Wren can do it without getting caught, why can’t it be one of us? On the off chance that something goes wrong, we’re more likely to be able to defend ourselves in a fight.”

“Because Ludo might not tell me everything,”

Aubrey cuts in.

“He doesn’t trust anyone fully, and considering he’s trying to find a rat, he’s being extra selective about who he shares information with. I can ask for him to give me security details, but that doesn’t mean he will.”

“And again, if Wren gets caught, there’s no reason for things to turn violent,”

I say.

“She can just say she was grabbing something for Aubrey.”

“And if she’s caught holding the safe cracker?”

“Could it fit in a makeup bag?”

Aubrey asks.

“If so, problem solved.”

Rubbing his chin, Rhett says, “Depends on the safe. Did you get a look at it?”

“Um. Sort of? I know the brand name and that it wasn’t digital.”

“Perfect.”

Rhett grabs his laptop and pulls up all the different models available from the brand Aubrey gives him. He’s able to narrow it down to ones with a dial instead of a keypad, so she identifies the one Ludo has quickly.

The more we explore the idea of Wren retrieving the hard drive, the more distressed Elliot gets. He’s just sitting there, his expression growing more and more grim. Odds are, he’s trying to do exactly what he promised and find another way to get to the safe. But the more we develop our plan for Wren to do it, the more sense it makes.

I’m nervous about it, too, but I don’t know how much longer we can stay in our current state. We’re all so exhausted and stressed, and I know I’m not the only one wishing this was already over. Something has to give.

“Once you’re in the billiard room,”

Aubrey says to Wren, “you’ll be perfectly safe. Ludo will be too occupied during the reception to get away, and his men know not to go in there without permission. The door is usually locked, but I stole a key once and made a copy.”

“You did?”

Wren asks with surprise.

“That sounds risky.”

Aubrey shrugs.

“I was feeling quite spiteful when I first had to move in. Now, back to the point. As long as we time you entering and leaving the billiard room correctly, it doesn’t matter if you get caught in a hallway. Not since the safe cracker can fit in a makeup bag.”

“And if she gets caught leaving the room?”

Elliot asks.

“Then she pretends she’s lost?”

Aubrey suggests.

“It’s a large mansion.”

“I don’t like it,”

Elliot mutters.

“We knew we’d have to take extra risks when we got to this point,”

I remind him gently.

“I know. But those risks weren’t supposed to…”

As he trails off, he glances at Wren.

They weren’t supposed to involve her.

After a moment of silence, Wren clears her throat.

“Let’s say I get caught and can’t pull off a reasonable excuse. What’s the worst-case scenario? Ludo loses his trust in you guys? Kills all of us?”

“Most likely,”

I reply, not wanting to add on that he wouldn’t just kill us.

“And what’s the worst-case scenario if one of you three does it?”

Aubrey asks, catching on to what Wren is getting at.

“The same thing,”

Rhett says.

Elliot shakes his head miserably.

“You’re missing the fact that if it’s one of us, we can probably convince Ludo that Wren wasn’t involved at all. We could keep her safe, even if he turns against us.”

“And you’re missing the fact that Ludo is a cruel bastard,”

Rhett replies.

“It doesn’t matter if he thinks Wren isn’t in on us taking him down. He’ll use her to hurt us anyway.”

Of course it’d be Rhett who makes sure to not leave anything unsaid.

“So there’s no room for mistakes. Just like normal,”

I say.

“We can handle this, Elliot.”

He looks like he wants to protest, but he must be too exhausted to try. Raising his hands in surrender, he slouches into the chair. “Fine.”

“So Wren will get the hard drive, and then what?”

Aubrey asks.

“Are you guys keeping it and hoping Ludo will be distracted enough with searching for me that he doesn’t realize it’s missing? Or are you getting everything off it and then putting it back?”

“No,”

Elliot groans.

“We’re not doubling our chances of everything falling apart. Ludo doesn’t have cameras, so as long as no one sees Wren, he’ll have no clue we took it. Most likely, he’ll pin it on his rat, as long as Ludo hasn’t found them by then. Or he’ll pin it on you, Aubrey, since you’ll disappear at the same time the drive does.”

“And I’ll be perfectly safe from his wrath, so that’s fine,” she says.

“Okay. So we keep the hard drive.”

Rhett turns to Aubrey.

“Then we continue on with the reception like nothing happened, and once everyone is gone, we get you out?”

She nods.

“I can tell you that Ludo’s normal security doesn’t leave much room for sneaking out of the mansion. He has men patrolling the perimeter of the property at all times, and there’s almost never a window of time where a part of the yard is going unwatched.”

“Distraction?”

I suggest.

“I love a good distraction.”

To my relief, a small smile tugs at the edges of Elliot’s mouth.

“That’s for sure.”

As we toss around ideas for a diversion that could work, some of Elliot’s anxiety seems to ease. Wren is still on the floor holding both his hands, which I think is helping to soothe him.

Eventually, we come up with a solid plan. It involves Finn since he doesn’t run in the same circles as us. Ludo’s men won’t recognize him, which is exactly what we need.

Finn will have to disable the airbags in one of his cars and wreck it, but he won’t be going fast enough to hurt himself badly. As long as he agrees—which he will—we’re all set.

Rhett also orders a safe identical to Ludo’s so Wren can practice breaking into it. That seems to ease some of the anxiety she’s trying to hide. As for getting a safe cracker, one of us texts Finn, and he—of course—already has one. The man has his hands in so many cookie jars that it’s beginning to get ridiculous.

By the time we have a plan that everyone is happy with, Elliot is mostly stable. It helps that we’re taking every precaution possible. It’s still nerve-wracking, but we have a couple weeks to help Wren prepare.

Aubrey and Wren start going over the blueprints, so I perch on the arm of Elliot’s chair. When he turns to meet my gaze, he attempts a smile.

“Doing okay?”

My fingers skirt over his jaw.

“As okay as can be expected.”

Elliot pauses before sighing.

“We have to be careful, Ol.”

“Aren’t we always?”

“Extra careful, then.”

Leaning down, I kiss his forehead.

“We’ve got this. And if we don’t, we can ask Finn to help us during the reception. You know he would.”

“Without a doubt,”

Rhett says. He’s on the couch with his laptop open, but he’s been watching us silently. Now he shuts it and moves closer toward us.

“If you want him on standby the night of the wedding, he’d happily do it.”

“I think we can handle it, though,”

I say.

“We can get Wren ready.”

She must hear me say her name because Wren looks up from where she’s studying the blueprints on the coffee table. “What?”

“Love…”

Elliot runs a hand over his face.

“You’re sure about this?”

After exchanging a glance with Aubrey, Wren nods.

“I’m positive. It’s the option that’s most likely to work, and I think deep down, you know that.”

Grudgingly, he mumbles, “Yeah.”

At least one of us can talk some sense into him.

“We’ll make sure she’s more than prepared,”

Aubrey says, “and I’ll do everything I can to learn more about Ludo’s security plans for that area of the house.”

“And I’ll be careful,”

Wren adds.

“Extra careful.”

“We know, princess.”

I have faith in her, and I know Elliot does, too. I just hope he can find it before his anxiety becomes too much.