Page 50 of Risks of Temptation

"I need to know what happened."

"Why? So you can see and treat me differently?"

"No. I won't."

She opens her eyes. "You will. And I'm tired of letting it rule my life. He destroys everything I should have."

"If you don't tell me, I'm going to assume things. Would you rather I create a million different scenarios in my mind about what happened to you?"

She avoids me again but quietly replies, "He was my mother's boyfriend. Naomi caught him, forcing himself on me. It first happened the night of my tenth birthday and lasted almost a year."

My stomach pitches. I swallow down bile. I'm going to kill him. I attempt to keep my voice controlled, but it comes out in a growl. "Who is he?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does. Tell me now," I roughly demand.

"Zaka Tillett. But he's dead. I saw it in the paper last year."

"I hope he died a painful death."

She snorts and turns back. "Heart attack. The article made it sound like he went quickly."

I'm not sure how to stop my anger. Images of Emilia as a little girl with tear-stained cheeks appear in my mind. A knife slashes through my heart.

A cloud covers the moon, and it becomes darker.

"He still haunts you...when men touch you." It's a statement, and not a question. Self-loathing for how I've been with her fills me.

Her face hardens. Even with only the flickering of the firelight, I don't miss it. She slides off my lap and moves several feet away from me. Angrily, she spouts, "This is why I didn't want to tell you."

Why is she mad at me?

"Ma belle—"

"No. I don't need more pity or for you to feel like you did something wrong. I'm tired of being untouchable and unlovable and undesirable. It makes me ill when I think about how much of my life is a complete waste. And everyone treats me like I can't handle things. Just like today. I don't know why I'm surprised. Did everyone get together and discuss how weak I am and that no one should tell me what is going on?"

Her statement is loaded. She's right, and she's wrong. I try to figure out what part of it to address first, but the more time that passes, the angrier she gets.

Her voice shakes. "I thought you were different. I guess I was wrong." She rises and goes to the river, then sits on a flat boulder, hugging her knees.

After a few minutes pass, I go to her. I slide behind her so she's between my legs and circle my arms around her. She freezes.

"Nothing about you is weak. I see your strength. No one discussed you or intentionally hid anything. Whatever the others' circumstances are, I didn't bother to get involved. The only thing I could focus on since arriving in Belize is you."

She sniffles, and the cloud moves, uncovering the moon.

"There's nothing about you that doesn't make my blood buzz, ma belle. All I want to do is touch you and love you. My desire for you hasn't changed because I know what happened."

She turns her head toward me. "It hasn't?"

In French, I say, "No. You're a sneaky little vixen making my cock hurt badly." I slide my hand through her hair and kiss her, parting her lips with my tongue and urgently exploring her mouth.

She matches my intensity, and her fingers slowly stroke my shaft through my pants.

I groan and pull back. "Ma belle, you're killing me."

She repositions her body so she's straddling me. "Did you mean it?"

"What?"

"You think I'm strong and can handle things?"

"Yes. Don't doubt yourself. No matter what anyone else thinks, you won't break. If you were going to, you would have by now."

"If you believe that, then will you please tell me the truth about what Naomi is involved in and why I can't stay in Belize?"