Page 3

Chapter three

Finn

I adjust Rosie in my arms, bouncing her gently as she lets out a little whimper. “Come on, kid, don’t sell me out now. We crushed it today. Storytime, baby group, milk on the go, that rogue nap you took while I was mid diaper change—we were a team, Rosie girl.”

She blinks up at me, unimpressed. I sigh.

“Tough crowd.” I nudge her nose with mine, and that stops some of her noises. Those big blue eyes look up at me, all wonder and curiosity. “Don’t think I missed how you used those pretty eyes to get Baby Preston’s attention at group today. Bold move, considering he had a drool mustache.”

She perks up slightly as I talk to her, giving me a little half smile, just as Daphne and Hudson walk through the front door, both looking way too put together for people balancing school and a nearly five-month-old.

I feel very disheveled after having Rosie for a full day like I do on Wednesdays.

It’s their long day, and I hardly have a second to pee.

Hudson drops his duffel near the entryway, while Daphne immediately beelines for her, her hands outstretched.

“There’s my perfect little angel,” she coos, pressing a kiss to Rosie’s forehead. “Did you have a good time with Uncle Finn?”

Rosie lets out a massive spit bubble.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” I mutter, handing her over. “I’ve been teaching her to say Finn . She looks at me and blinks, so that’s going well.”

Hudson smirks, flopping onto the couch. “She’d better say Daddy first.”

“I don’t think so,” Daphne argues. “I didn’t push her out of me to have your name be the first, Hudson. Mama all the way, right, baby girl?”

Daphne coos over Rosie as I wipe a streak of drool from my sleeve. “So, how was class? Did they finally teach you how to file restraining orders against an annoying boyfriend who also happen to be your baby daddy?”

Daphne snorts while Hudson grins. “Joke’s on you, Finny boy. She loves me.”

My sister leans down, pecking Hudson’s lips before passing Rosie to him.

“He’s right, I do.”

I roll my eyes. “You two are all gross and in love.”

“And maybe you could be too, dear brother, if you get a life.” She levels me with one of her infamous take-no-shit stares. “You’ve been back for months now. What do you do when you’re not with Rosie?”

Shit. Well, that’s not something I was expecting to answer right now.

I glance toward the fridge, as if maybe it holds an answer, or escape.

Maybe I suddenly have the urge to make a Mediterranean feast that will allow me to leave this conversation.

Even though I don’t cook. Maybe if I focus on my inability to make hummus, I won’t think about losing one of my closest friends.

I won’t think about that day at all. My throat clams up, but I try to swallow through it and tell myself it’s okay. I’m not back there.

“I’m around,” I say vaguely, edging toward the fridge slowly. “You know, just…adjusting to things.”

Daphne doesn’t respond right away. I can feel her watching me, but I keep my eyes on Rosie in Hudson’s arms instead. “You don’t wanna elaborate? I’m just trying to help here.”

My stomach clenches. I grab my water bottle from the coffee table to keep my hands busy.

“I’m still figuring out what my next steps are, okay?

” It’s more than that, which is why I know she won’t let it go.

But lately, I feel like there’s this glass wall between us.

Like she’s reaching for me, and I keep backing away, too afraid that if I tell her all my fears, the whole fragile thing between us will shatter.

Why is it harder to talk to the one person who you trust most, but easier to talk to a stranger?

She knows why I left and what happened. I mean, eventually, once I’d been back, it was impossible to hide it with the articles and the fact that I suddenly had a weekly therapist, thanks to my old manager’s request. But as the silence pulls tighter between us, I hate it.

I hate that I don’t know how to talk to her anymore.

When we were kids, she’d finish my sentences.

Now I can’t even finish a thought without evading the real answer she wants.

I take a sip of water and focus on Rosie instead, her tiny fists waving in the air.

She’s safe and uncomplicated. But even that makes something ache deep in my chest. Because I should feel that kind of peace too, right?

I should want to be here. I do want to be here.

But the weight I brought home with me is heavier than I thought it’d be, and I have no idea what my future looks like.

“But Finn—”

“He doesn’t want to talk about it, Daph.” Hudson cuts in before she can push further, and I’m grateful for him interrupting, reading the room. Something Daphne is usually good at, but not when it comes to having concern for me.

Running a hand through my hair, I sigh, wishing I could give her more. I’m just not ready to talk about it yet. So, I do what I do best and deflect. “In fact, I’ve started a Feet-Finder account, and people go wild for my smooth, arched surfer feet.”

Daphne’s face scrunches up, the tension still here but slightly less. “Gross.”

Hudson throws his head back in laughter as he moves to sit with Rosie. “I hear people make a shit ton of money doing that. You’re onto something.”

“For sure,” I agree, avoiding Daphne’s eyes. My sister exhales another heavy breath, but drops it. For now, and I deflate internally.

Hudson tilts his head at me from the couch, his usual easy-going expression shifting to something a little too observant. “You got any friends here yet, man? Someone to hang out with besides your sister and me?”

“I lived in Oregon my whole life.” I scoff as I make my way over to him. The answer to that would be no. All my high school friends have gone to college, so that leaves me with, oh, you know, everyone in this room.

He pulls his phone from his pocket, holding his baby girl with one hand—impressively I might add—and unlocking it with a swipe up. “There’s a solution to your lack of fun, if you’re open to it.”

I frown, watching as he taps something on his phone, and suddenly mine buzzes.

When I see he’s sent me a link, I click on it to find a neon pink and dark blue interface with a flame logo in the corner. SPARK flashes across the top of the screen.

I arch an eyebrow. “Seriously?”

Hudson points to my phone, enthused. “Dude. It’s not just a dating app.

It’s a hookup app. No frills, people know what it is.

You swipe, match, and see what happens. A friend of mine works for them.

He graduated last year and told me about it.

” He flicks his eyes to my sister and grins at her.

“Told him I’d never need to download the app, though. I’ve got my girls.”

This could be a really great idea or a really awful one.

I’m leaning toward awful.

“Hard pass,” I say, even though I’m still staring at the screen.

Hudson leans forward, adjusting Rosie on his thighs. “You say that now, but I bet you download it within the next hour.”

“Please.” I toss my phone on the counter out of temptation. “I have more self-control than that.”

He gives me a pointed look. And that’s fair, considering my hookups are usually whoever shows me the most interest on any given night.

I’ve been out and bi since high school, so whoever caught my eye on apps while I was traveling was how I’d roll.

“Think about it; you might even make a friend out of it. No strings, no pressure. Just something to pass the time.”

No strings. No pressure.

That actually sounds…perfect.

I shake my head. “I don’t know, man.”

Rosie lets out a small coo from his lap, almost like she’s telling me something.

Hudson laughs. “Just think about it, Finny.”

I roll my eyes again. “The nickname isn’t sticking, by the way. It’s Finn. I’ll start calling you Daddy if you keep that shit up.”

He scowls and pouts at me. “Daphne is the only one—”

She slams a hand over his mouth, stifling the rest of that sentence. Thank God. I might be their nanny, but I do not need to know about their sex life. There’s a limit here.

“He doesn’t know what he’s saying.” She releases his mouth with a hard glare. Hudson just smirks and blows her a kiss.

“Come on, Rosie girl. Let’s get you in the bath and to bed so Daddy can have some alone time with Mommy.”

“Sweet Jesus, save me,” I mutter, tipping my head back and looking up to the ceiling.

“Hudson!” Daphne chastises, following him, but I can hear her stifling a laugh.

The moment he and Daphne disappear into the bathroom with Rosie, I grab my phone again.

The neon pink-and-blue logo glares at me through the screen as I pull up the app store.

I hover over the download button. It’s just hookups. Fun.

And then, before I can talk myself out of it…I’m tapping to sign up.