Page 27 of Rhaz’s Redemption (Shifters of Valo Prime #6)

Beatrice

I still didn’t know how to feel about Rhaz and all his kindness.

He’d been so closed off before, that this abrupt openness was almost jarring.

I’d been in relationships in the past where I was love bombed until I gave into their desires, and then they ghosted me without a word afterward.

Was that what was happening here? Was Rhaz only doing nice things to get me to trust him?

Would his kindness stop once I returned his affection?

No matter what his motivations were, I could feel my walls beginning to crumble. I liked being around him, and I liked his attention, even as intense as it was. The way he looked at me as if I were the rising sun, made my heart skip a beat.

Rhaz got up after he’d finished his dinner, and I washed my hands off in the stream. When I returned to our little cabin I found him shaking out the furs that made up my bed.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“I’m shaking out the dust and making sure your furs are properly fluffed out and laid down for maximum comfort.”

He laid down the fur he’d just shaken out in such a way that did make it look softer than before.

I was impressed, but still weary of his motives.

Would he do things like this when we got back home?

There was nothing more devastating than being with someone who insisted on doing nice things like opening your car door, hanging up your coat, cooking you dinner, and so on, just for them to suddenly take all those nice things away.

In one of the few relationships I’ve had, my boyfriend would open my car door for me every time we went somewhere.

That was until he decided he was done with me and our relationship.

Then I suddenly found myself opening my own doors, and hanging up my own coat.

We broke up shortly after and I’ve been weary of men doing nice things for me ever since.

“You don’t have to do that,” I found myself saying for the second time tonight. Maybe he felt like he had to do it, as if it were an obligation of a luminescence mate.

Rhaz gave me a puzzled look and said, “I know I don’t have to do this. I want to do it.”

“Oh, alright.” I didn’t know what else to say. He kept surprising me, and although I liked this version of him, I could not seem to stop myself from questioning every little thing he did.

Once he was finished with my bed of furs I tentatively laid down, not wanting to mess up all his hard work. An involuntary sigh escaped me and I couldn’t help but curl up into the softness that was surrounding my body.

“One final thing.” Rhaz said as he came strolling back into the cabin with a balled up fur.

“To keep you warm.” He placed the bundle on the bottom of my bed of furs. He’d warmed up some rocks for me so I wouldn’t have to do it myself.

“You-” I was tempted to inform him he didn’t have to do that, but I knew how that would go. I settled for a bashful “Thank you,” instead.

“No need to thank me,” he replied. “I like doing things for you.”

Did he? That was the question that plagued me as I fell asleep that night. Did he really enjoy doing things for me, and if so, would any of this change if we got into a real relationship?

The next day, came and went and Rhaz continued to do nice things for me. He made all our meals, brought me tea in the morning, and filled me in on his escape plan. I was continuing to warm up to him, but still nervous about accepting this as our new reality.

Rhaz had made himself scarce that afternoon, and I assumed he was working on his rope or another plan to get us out of the ravine. It wasn’t until dinner that I realized he’d secretly been making leaf stars which were piled on the log we usually sat on in a pretty display around our dinner.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he said hesitantly after I stared at his kind gesture without speaking.

“I drew the human love symbol on them too,” Rhaz picked up a leaf star and handed it to me, and sure enough there was a heart drawn on the front.

I traced the symbol with my finger and continued to stare at the gift in my hand. I wanted to speak but no words would come out.

This was lovely, and thoughtful, and yet…

“If you don’t like them, you can burn them. That is what they’re made for after all.” Rhaz ran a nervous hand through his hair as he looked to me then back at the leaf in my hand.

“No, it’s beautiful,” I assured him, but my words weren’t very convincing.

“Something’s still wrong, isn’t it?” He asked in a soft tone.

“It’s…” I tried to think of how I could put this feeling into words and I just couldn’t.

“I…”

“This is…” I looked at the pile of leaves that had been delicately folded into star shapes and sighed. “Everything you’ve been doing is so wonderful.”

“If that were true,” Rhaz began slowly. “Then why do you keep looking at me as if I am not someone to be trusted?”

There it was. I thought I’d been hiding my feelings under my smiles, but I guess not. Rhaz could read me like a book and I wasn’t sure how I felt about that either. It made me feel laid bare and vulnerable in ways I wasn’t ready for.

“I hurt you,” he began again. “And trust isn’t earned in a day. So it’s alright that you don’t share my affection. You don’t have to, not now, not ever. I just want to make you happy.”

His head was hung low in defeat and even his tail looked sad as it trailed through the dirt.

“I do like the things you’ve been doing for me,” I confessed. “You’re wonderful.”

“Beatrice,” Rhaz purred my name in a low tone and stepped closer to me. “There’s more to it than that. I can see it in your eyes. There’s something you’re not telling me and I’m dying to know what you’re thinking.”

“But what if it’s bad?” I asked and chewed my bottom lip.

“I have earned your ire. Whatever secrets lie within your heart, I wish to hear them. Please,” he begged.

I chewed my bottom lip and looked at the pile of leaf stars again. “I’m afraid to love you back.”

Rhaz opened his mouth to speak but I put a finger to his lips. “I’m afraid that all these nice things you’re doing for me are just to win me over, and that you’ll stop doing them once we’re together.”

Rhaz took a step back as if I’d punched him, and I immediately felt bad. I didn’t want to hurt him. I turned to walk away, but Rhaz grabbed my wrist and forced me to turn and face him.

There was pain in his eyes, and that intensity that was always simmering just under the surface.

“I like doing things for you. It doesn’t matter if you love me back. You don’t ever have to love me back, but I will never stop doing nice things for you.” His words were soft and reverent and full of genuine honesty.

“Why?” The question slipped from my lips before I could stop it. I wasn’t usually so bold, but fuck it. I was on an alien planet trapped in a ravine with a male who was supposed to be my mate. So why not?

“Why?” Rhaz cupped my cheek in his large blue hand and looked down at me with a softness I’d never seen on his face before.

“Because whenever I look into these beautiful brown eyes, I see the entire universe.

I see everything that ever was and everything that ever will be.

When I see you, I see someone who is smart, beautiful, wise, and kind, and I want to be the male who is worthy enough to be called yours.

Maybe not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but someday I want to be worthy enough to be yours.

Rhaz’s words took the breath right out of me. I…I wanted that too. I wanted to be with him. But the question remained, “How do we move forward?”

He looked down at the food he’d prepared for us and said, “let’s start with dinner.”

His statement was so logical and simple that it made me laugh. We would go forward one step at a time, and right now the next step was dinner.

“I can do that,” I smiled.

We sat down on the log together and he passed me a fruit bar and some nuts.

“When we get out of here I’ll make you a proper dinner,” he promised.

“I’d like that.”

Rhaz picked up one of the leaf stars he’d made and held it up. “To getting out of here.”

He threw the leaf into the flames and we watched as his wish turned to ash and rose to the heavens for the goddess to hear.

I picked up a leaf star and declared, “to moving forward one step at a time.”

Rhaz grinned as I threw my leaf into the fire.

“May the goddess hear our wishes tonight,” he said with a pleased smile on his face.

“I hope so too.” My cheeks heated as his gaze lingered on me and his pleased smile turned into a flirtatious one.

That was another thing I’d have to get used to.

He wasn’t the grumpy sirret hunter that I’d known for the five, almost six, months I’d been here.

He seemed happier now, more relaxed. Even here stuck in this ravine, he seemed pleased because he was stuck here with me.