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“Lay, are you alright? What’s wrong?” His hand comes to my shoulder as his eyes search my face.

I wrap a shaky arm around my middle and squeeze my eyes shut against all the horror that keeps replaying in my mind.

“Mr. Buford.” I wince as I say his name.

“Who?” Maddox asks confused .

“Your father killed Mr. Buford tonight. He drove a sword right through his throat.” My eyes burn as I open them to look into Maddox’s round whisky-colored ones. “I just stood there.”

“Did my father see you?” His brow furrows and a trace of fear flickers over his face.

“No.” He visibly relaxes at my answer.

“Thank the Gods. I don’t even want to think of what Tamish and my father would do if they caught you again. I wish you would stop. Why must you insist on leaving the castle?”

“You know why,” I sigh. “The King could cut off all my fingers and toes, and I’d still find a way out of this room. The people of Bellehaven need me.”

“One of the boys I worked on tonight had a broken arm with such a bad infection if I had not come, he would have been dead by the week’s end.” The slums tended to be a place where infection spread fast and viciously.

“You work all day, every day using your power until near burnout, and still, somehow it’s not enough for you.” He puts his arm around me and helps me to stand.

Maddox sighs, curling and uncurling his fist. “I know I’ve told you this before, but you can’t save everyone.

” His hand finds my chin and tilts my face, so that I’m looking into his warm eyes again.

“I love your heart and support you, but if you get caught, I can’t watch Tamish torture you again.

I was almost driven mad with how badly I wanted to kill him and my father for that matter. ”

Fear skates up my spine fast and acute as I remember my latest punishment. “You and I both.” I lay my head against his strong shoulder and breathe him in, instantly relaxing.

For the first time my racing mind finally slows. I have to stay focused on all the people that I can save, not the ones that I can’t. I tuck the memory of Mr. Buford away and turn it into resolve remembering his last words. “The Gods gifted me this power and it is mine alone.”

“Lay.” Maddox pushes again, clearly not wanting to drop it yet.

“I’ll be more careful, alright? No one wants your father’s attention off them more than me.

” I tell him what he needs to hear and then attempt to change the subject before the events of the day drag me under.

“Now, please tell me you brought food or alcohol?” I am utterly drained and desperately in need of one or both of the latter.

“I wouldn’t show up to your room empty-handed.” He turns and I right myself as he crosses the room, pulling out a bottle of wine and some chocolate croissants from his bag.

He holds them up and his full lips tip up in a crooked heart-stopping smile.

He’s always been objectively attractive with a strong jawline and shaggy brown hair that curls when it gets too long.

He has carved-out cheeks, and a body that makes many women forgive him after he fails to contact them for weeks at a time .

“Gods above, I love you,” I exclaim, as he pops the wine cork and pours us two glasses.

“I know; I’m the perfect man. The Gods gift to women, really,” he jokes, and I roll my eyes as I snatch a croissant from his hand.

“There you go, ruining it with your mouth again.” I take a bite and swallow a moan when the buttery, chocolate flavor coasts over my tastebuds. “Aren’t you going to hand me my wine?”

“You were supposed to meet me for training this morning and never showed. That means you make it up to me tonight, and after, you can have a glass of wine.”

I wince remembering how I slept in this morning.

“If you want to sneak out of the castle, especially without Hecktor or me, then you need to know how to defend yourself. Now finish your croissant, you’re not getting out of it tonight.” He points a gleaming dagger at the pastry in my hand.

“Keep the wine, I don’t want it anyway.” I collapse back onto my bed.

“Layla,” he growls, “you’ve got to take this seriously. I don’t know what I would do if anything ever happened to you.”

“Fine.” I shove the remaining croissant piece in my mouth and stand. “Please show me your ways.”

“That’s the attitude,” he declares, and I swallow as he fastens his dagger to his hip. “Okay, first lesson. You need to be able to disarm someone. See if you can take my dagger from its sheath.”

“Why can’t I have my own dagger?”

“Because I am rather attached to all my appendages.”

“Very funny.” I peer down at where his dagger sits and attempt to grab the handle. Maddox slaps my hand away. “Hey, that hurt!” I cradle the back of my hand.

“You weren’t fast enough and your eyes gave you away. Try again.”

I keep my eyes on his, only glancing at the handle before trying to swipe it from where it sticks out.

He swats me away. “Stop looking at the dagger, Lay.”

I swallow my frustration and focus my eyes back on his warm brown ones. I step closer to him getting a whiff of his freshly showered skin. I whip my hand out, and it brushes the hilt before he smacks it away.

“Better, but you need to use your body, fake like you are going to go one way, then move in the opposite direction. Distract and confuse.”

I bend my knees, resetting my focus back on him. I step to the left and try to jerk to the right but end up tripping over my own feet and grabbing for Maddox, hooking my arm around his neck before we both fall to a heap on the floor.

Maddox lands on top of me. “Really?” He smiles into my neck.

“Sorry, I really thought I had that one. ”

Maddox huffs a laugh as he props himself up. His face hovers above mine and I realize every other part of me is intimately pressed up against him. His muscled thigh rests between mine and every time I inhale my chest brushes his.

He must notice as well because his smile fades, and his eyes drift down, snagging on my mouth. I bite my bottom lip nervously.

“Don’t do that, Lay.” He groans in a soft whisper.

My body heats with his tortured request. “Do what?” I release my bottom lip, and my breath catches as he leans in further. My mind spins, and I know, without a doubt, he is about to kiss me.

I can’t let this happen. I have spent our friendship watching him charm his way from woman to woman and swore to myself I would never fall victim to his seduction.

Just as his full lips brush mine, I grasp the handle of his dagger and give it a firm yank.

“Got it,” I squeak. Maddox’s brows furrow as he pulls back. I half-heartedly brush the tip against his neck, drawing his attention. “You’ve been effectively disarmed,” I croak out, trying to bring some tension-breaking humor into my voice.

“I knew you had it in you.” He pushes up. I can see disappointment and possibly confusion pass over his face. I follow suit, rising on weak knees. He rubs the back of his neck, and I stand awkwardly, gripping the dagger .

I’m dumbfounded, attempting to figure out what the hell just happened. Maddox was my best friend. I’d never allowed myself to go there because he was all I had here and losing him wasn’t an option for me.

“Um, okay.” He clears his throat. “Now that you have the dagger, what are you going to do with it? I assume stabbing someone goes against the whole healer thing. The most effective move you could make would be to slam the hilt into the attacker’s temple.

You’ve got to be quick and precise, but if you do it correctly, you can successfully knock them unconscious. ”

“Show me.” I’m eager to avoid talking about what just almost happened.

He stalks closer and stops a foot from me. I hold my breath as he gingerly grabs my wrist and tilts it back, so the blade now faces me hilt out.

“Grip the hilt harder,” he commands, and my knuckles turn white with effort.

“Now, you want to aim here. He guides my hand to his temple and presses the hilt there. The hit must be fast, and more importantly, it must be hard. Try the movement a few times.” He drops my wrist, and I give the dagger a squeeze before swinging in an up motion and stopping right before his temple.

“Nice, again.”

I repeat the motion a few times, getting more confident with each swing. On my fifth attempt, my movements get sloppy. I’m so tired from the day I miscalculate and accidentally strike him.

“Shit, Layla.” He grabs his head, and the dagger clatters to the ground as I lower it before him.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Let me see it.” I grab for him and am already reaching for my depleted power when he stops me.

“Don’t even think about using your powers on me. You have nothing left in your reserve; I can feel it.”

“Maddox, I have enough, just let me?—”

“I’m fine.” He straightens, and I push up off the floor, standing on my tiptoes to get a better look at the hit.

“It’s already bruising.” I brush the tender skin and feel a whisper of my power pull from deep in my belly.

“Good, I don’t mind bruising, it gives me more sympathy and attention from the women around me.” His eyes are soft as they sweep over me, watching as I fuss over him.

I have no doubt that is true and he is not lacking in that area.

I snort, grabbing a few pieces of ice from the bucket the wine sits in and wrapping them in a cloth.

“Lay down.” I grab the two filled glasses of ruby liquid.

“I’m assuming training is over, and I can drink now?

” I hand him the glass from where he now lays on my bed.

“I thought you didn’t want any?” He smiles into his wine and downs half the glass in one gulp.

“I lied.” I sit on the bed and pat my lap. He moves his head to lay there, and I place the ice over his bruised temple. He winces. “You’re really playing this up.” I grin as I brush a few stray brunette strands off his forehead.

“How is the search for your future queen going? Any contenders for your heart yet?” I take a sip of wine and try to sound nonchalant.

“Well, Beth Anne nearly got me to propose this week. She’s perfected the art of cock sucking to masterful levels.” He wiggles his eyebrows, and I slap him in the arm as he laughs. Maddox has always been a ladies’ man who likes to indulge in women often and doesn’t discriminate much.

“You are truly a scoundrel.” My cheeks reddened at his crass words.

He takes a sip of his wine and then turns to me.

“What about you? Are you ever going to get your head out of a book or take any time away from the infirmary to find company with a man? I think an orgasm or two would be exponentially helpful to you.” He smirks as my cheeks heat to the color of my wine.

“This isn’t about me, stop changing the subject.” I’d had only one male encounter before; it was quick and left me deeply unsatisfied.

“Seriously, Lay. I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen you with a male that wasn’t me. I certainly can’t remember the last time you laid with one. Don’t you ever get lonely?”

“Of course I don’t get lonely, I have you. Now, mention my sex life one more time and the contents of this glass are going to end up overturned on your head.” I hold my glass high and raise my eyebrow.

“Alright, alright. I’m just saying, it wouldn’t hurt to indulge occasionally. Let yourself have a little fun.”

“I let myself have plenty of fun. I am the definition of fun.” I stand, setting the glasses down and Maddox gives me an amused look. “Maybe you’re right. There has to be a male out there less insufferable than you.” Grabbing my pillow, I throw it, and it hits him square in the face.

“You wound me.” He grabs the pillow and throws it back at me.

I laugh, tipping my head back as my body begins to feel light and heady. I sway around the room, humming happily when I hear a tearing noise. Turning, I see Maddox set a book back on my side table, waving the singular piece of paper in the air, grinning.

“You did not just rip that out of my book!” I huff exasperated. He holds out a hand as if to keep me at bay and begins to fold the paper. “What page did you rip out? I wasn’t finished! Now how will I know what happens?”

“We have an entire library of books; I’ll get you another one.” He waves me off and continues to crease the page until he holds up a small paper rose. “For you.”

I narrow my eyes at him but take the offering, spinning it between my fingers to admire it. “That’s what you always say. I’d rather know what happens in my book…but thank you.” I smile despite myself and sniff the faux flower be fore placing it in the drawer of my bedside table next to the others.

Maddox continues filling our cups until it is so late my eyes grow bleary. I sway around the room, bumping into my cluttered dresser. Some of my many trinkets topple to the ground, a collection of all the offerings people had given me over the years in lieu of coin.

“Okay, I think it’s time to sleep.” Maddox saunters over to me and his hands grasp my hips to steady me. I drunkenly smile up at him, and he stills as his eyes track the movement. His hand comes up, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone. “You are exquisite. Have I ever told you that?”

“Oh no.” I push at his chest and stumble away towards the bed. “No, no, no, no. Save it for Beth Anne; I am immune to your charm.”

“Lay.” Maddox grabs for me as I begin to topple over. My head is pleasantly buzzing, and my body feels heavy and relaxed. “Don’t push me away like you do to every other man.” His words sober me for a moment as I peer up at him. He looks down at me with a pleading look that scares me.

“I watched what it did to my mother when he died.” I murmur, “I watched how it changed her. It ate away at her mind, body, and soul.” The drunken confession tumbles out of me. I vowed to never let the same thing happen to me.

“I know,” he whispers, pulling me into his lean body. “I know,” he says again, and I wrap my arms around his middle, allowing my sadness to rise to the surface .

He rests his chin on the top of my head. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.” He walks me backward a few steps before lowering me onto the soft sheets. Pulling up the bedding, he slides in behind me and pulls me against his chest. “You aren’t her.”