Page 25

I stared at myself in the mirror and smiled. I couldn't remember the last time I felt happy like this, excited about something—truly excited. We were having girls' night, and I couldn't wait. I knew they were going to have tons of questions since the screaming match the guys had, but I had answers. I didn't have to act or keep anything a secret this time around. I could just be honest.

I applied my lipstick, taking in my outfit. I was wearing ripped jeans and a black lacey top. I pulled my hair half up, at least keeping my bangs out of my face. The blouse rose at times, which showed in my belly button piercing.

It was an outfit I used to love but stopped wearing for various reasons. Ivan had hated when I showed my belly button off, but of course, he loved it when we were alone, and he'd aim for the damn thing.

But the girls and Weslie made me feel like I belonged and all my extra things were okay. He loved my tattoos and piercings and accepted me for who I was, and it was comforting.

I grabbed my shoes and headed down the hallway to leave. I slipped my shoes on and turned to grab my phone when someone knocked on the door.

"One second," I said, searching for my phone. I patted myself down and scowled. "Where the fuck did I leave it this time? I swear I had it just a moment ago."

I'd been scatterbrained the last few days. I wasn't sure if it was the nerves from Ivan or if it was just because I was feeling comfortable there.

"I just had it," I grumbled, trying to retrace my steps. I was on the phone with Riley in the bathroom and then on the phone with Weslie in the living room. I thought I had set it in my pocket or left it on the couch.

There was another knock, and I shrugged, giving up the search. I'll just have Riley call it, and it will ring. It would be a lot easier than me frantically ripping the apartment apart for it.

"Hey Riley, can you call my phone? I don't know where the hell I put it." I unlocked the door and swung it open wide. My heart stopped beating, and my eyes widened as I realized it wasn't Riley. It was Ivan.

My entire body stiffened as he stared at me angrily. I'd seen those eyes more than a few times and knew what he could do when he was this mad.

I'd been punched, shoved on the floor, and choked when he was angry. He'd slapped me and pinned me on the bed, telling me what a disgrace I was. I'd been shoved against walls and felt up when I refused to have sex. I had put up with a lot and endured so much.

There were a lot of things I'd pushed down and forgotten about because Weslie had made me feel so safe. Suddenly, it came, hitting me like a train. I could remember all the tears or the times I prayed it would be over. All the times, I covered up the bruises and acted like everything was okay.

I swallowed, trying to pick my words carefully. I felt my fingers tighten on the door and tried to remain calm. "What are you doing here, Ivan?" How the hell did he know I was here?

He didn't speak for a moment, his eyes traveling over me, and I knew he stopped on my piercing before he brought his eyes back up. "I see you still wear this outfit."

I wet my lips, nudging my foot slightly back to hold the door. If he tried pushing it further, it would stop. I had to make sure he couldn't get into the apartment.

I swallowed. "Ivan, you need to leave."

"You see, that's where you're wrong. You're my wife."

I shook my head. I felt like we had been going in circles. "No, I'm not. I'm not your wife. I'm married to someone else now."

Ivan took a step forward and grabbed my wrist. I tried to break free, but his fingers held. "You can run and hide, but you will never be free of me, April. Don't you get that?"

"Ivan, just stop," my voice quivered, and I suddenly wondered where my confidence went. Where did the woman who wouldn't allow anything bad to happen again go? Where did my ability to stick up for myself go?

I knew it was the years of ridicule and the years of beating me into submission that were here. Ivan knew what to say to hurt me, and he did it well. He'd mastered it. He knew what to say and how to say it to strike me where it hurt.

"No, because I still love you."

"No, you don't," I growled. "You never loved me. You wanted someone to control."

He shoved forward, and I stumbled backward, landing on my ass. I crawled back a few feet as he stood there. "You think he loves you? Please. He doesn't. He is just like everyone else."

"He does," I growled, growing angry. "He loves me more than you ever could. I was just a thing to you, a person to do what you wanted. You didn't even treat me like a human."

Ivan took a few more steps into the apartment, and I pulled myself up, suddenly frantic. "You need to leave, Ivan! He will be home soon."

Ivan laughed. "Good, I'll kill him and drag your ass back where you belong."

I curled my hands into fists. I wasn't going back. I was part of this pack, and I wasn't leaving. I was married. I had a job and a place to live. There was nothing they could do to bring me back.

But I knew Ivan. He wanted something and wasn't going to give it to us until he got it. So, I did something I knew would make me sick, but it was my only shot. I had to play into this—at least get him out of the apartment.

I pulled myself up, and I took a step toward him. I felt my stomach flip as I reached up. I batted my eyelashes and puckered my lips. "Do you mean that? Would you kill for me?"

The sudden change caught Ivan off guard, and he stood still for a moment. I placed my hands on his chest, knowing exactly where to place them to get his attention. "You never said that before."

"I would," he said, placing his hands on my hips. "Now come home."

I wanted to vomit, hating the feel of his hands on me. But I needed to move him back towards the door. So, I stepped closer, running my hands down his chest. He stepped back with me. A smile tugged on his lips. "Are you finally coming to your senses? Going to come with me?"

I nodded. "As long as you promise your dick is only mine from now on."

I could see the fire burn in his eyes. "Why have you been resisting?"

I took another step forward, and we grew closer to the door. "I had to get you to see my point," I leaned closer, touching his lips. "You cheated, and I was hurt. I wanted you to understand how much you hurt me."

"And I apologized. You didn't have to run."

We stumbled to the doorway, and his face was so close. Too close. I hated where his hand sat, his fingers brushing against the top of my jeans.

"Come home," he asked softly. "Please. You have no idea how much I want you. How much I want to sink myself into you."

I pictured it. He'd pin me down onto the bed and fuck me. There was no romance, no foreplay, no workup. Half the time, I was dry, and he'd fuck me.

I forced a smile. "Okay."

He leaned in and kissed me. My inside twisted up, and I felt bile build up. I glanced at the door and grabbed it. I then pulled my hands up and shoved Ivan as hard as I could. He stumbled back out into the hall. It took him a second to realize what I'd done.

"Burn in hell, Ivan."

I slammed the door and quickly locked it. It was just a second later, and he started pounding on the door. "You fucking bitch! Unlock this door, April!"

I leaned on it, took a few deep breaths in, and quickly started wiping my mouth. I gagged, feeling my stomach curl up violently. I wanted to vomit all over the place and took a deep breath in through my nose.

"Unlock this door! God, damn it, April!"

I closed my eyes, wishing Weslie was here. I opened my eyes and quickly glanced around, searching for my phone. Still, I had no idea where I put it.

"You know what, April?" The pounding stopped. "You're going to regret this. You're going to regret all of this."

Silence fell, and I tried to calm my fast-beat heart. I pulled myself up, glancing at the door, and looked through the peephole. He was gone. I knew he was going to come back, so I turned and started running through the living room, searching for my phone. I threw the pillows and blankets off the couch. I yanked the cushions out and then turned towards the coffee table. I fanned through the drawers and then ran into the kitchen.

"Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!" I yelled, feeling tears build up. "Where the fuck is it?"

I ran by the front door when my feet froze at the smell. I sniffed again, and it was like a burning scent.

I turned to the front door and stared at it. The hairs on my body rose as I felt the heat. I walked towards the door and looked through the peephole. My eyes widened as smoke filled the space.

I tried to unlock the door and pull it open, but the door handle wouldn't move. I felt my stomach bottom out.

"No." I tried harder and harder, but the door wouldn't open. Tears started to break as the smoke seeped in through the bottom.

I moved, running towards the balcony, and started pulling at the door, but it wouldn't budge. I looked at the door and realized that the chair outside had fallen over, blocking the door from opening.

"No, no, no." I kicked at the door and shoved harder. Tears broke free.

I gave up on the door and moved to a window. I pounded on it and tried to move it, but the windows didn't budge. What scared me more was what they had the other day.

After Weslie and I fucked in the kitchen, I opened the windows and the patio to air the space out. And that was just a few days ago. There was no reason these wouldn't open now. I looked up and frowned, realizing they were locked, and I couldn’t reach the top.

I started to cry as I tried another window. The apartment started to fill with smoke, and I coughed as I tried to find another way out.

I grabbed one of the stools and threw it at the window. The stool bounced off the window, and I felt dizzy. My vision blurred as I pulled the stool back up and hit it against the window. It cracked.

I pulled it up again, but the stool slipped through my fingers, and I tumbled to the ground. I grabbed at my throat, trying hard to bring air in.

My lungs felt like they were giving out. My body felt like it was on fire. I tried to pull myself back up, but my limbs wouldn't listen.

I stared across the living room when I spotted something shining under the couch—my phone.

I felt hope. "I can…call."

I started to crawl towards my phone, and every muscle screamed as I did. My lungs hurt, and I began to wheeze as I moved. I was just a few inches from my phone when I grabbed it. I pulled the screen up and winced at it.

Black dots dotted my vision, and my fingers shook as I entered my pin.

Five. Two. Two... My fingers shook harder. I shook my head and tried to focus. I just needed to dial. That was all. I could do this.

Five. Two. Two. Five

My screen opened, and I could hardly see it. I clicked to dial when my body gave out. The phone slipped from my fingers, and everything went black.