Page 18

Yelena

I run as fast as I can, darting down the familiar paths. My wolf stretches out, eager to explore the area we used to love. We race through the underbrush, paws pounding against the ground, thudding in rhythm with the frantic beat of my heart.

The wind whistles past as we duck branches and leap over logs. It’s a potent sense of freedom that I’ve been missing in my time away. Despite everything, running like this, reconnecting with my wolf, it feels good.

But all too soon, the exhilaration fades, replaced with the grim reminder of reality.

Cleo.

I skid to a stop under a tree, my mind racing back to her. This time of day, she’s probably badgering Susan into giving her a snack before dinner, blissfully oblivious to the fact that she has been chosen by the Goddess herself.

I feel the panic prickling at my skin again, but this time, it’s coupled with fierce determination.

I have to protect her. I will do whatever it takes.

A twig snaps in the forest, and I jerk my head up, sniffing the wind for signs of an intruder.

Austin steps forward, shifting from his big black wolf into his human form as easily as breathing.

My breath catches in my throat as I look at his body.

The last time I saw him naked was the night we made love in our cottage.

The last five years have been good to him.

He’s put on more muscle and he carries himself with the confidence of a man who has grown into himself. He’s beautiful. And not mine anymore.

He’s carrying a small bundle in his hands, and he lays it in front of me.

“Hello, Yelena,” he says softly.

I look down, sniffing the bundle and realize he’s brought clothes to me.

I shift back, grabbing the clothes, and turn my back to him to pull them on.

“What are you doing here? Why did you follow me?” I ask once I’m fully dressed.

I’m relieved to see he’s pulled on a pair of shorts as well.

“You looked upset leaving Callie’s,” he says evasively. “I was worried about you.”

The idea of Austin being worried about me makes a hidden part of my heart tingle, but I brush it aside.

"I don’t need your concern," I reply, my voice sharper than intended. But Austin doesn't flinch. Quite the opposite. He smiles gently at me.

"I know you don’t." He steps closer, and for a moment, the shadows from the sun and the trees frame him, tall and protective. My heart twinges again.

"But you have it, anyway."

I swallow hard and look away, struggling to reconcile the man standing before me with the Austin I've known. You have it anyway .

I shiver and try to make sense of it all. This isn’t the Austin I remember. When we were together, it was always me who gave support, not him. I can’t remember a single time when Austin went out of his way to comfort me when I was upset. Has he really changed that much?

"I'm fine," I say, although it is far from the truth. But this isn't something I can involve him in, not yet. Not until I've figured things out.

"Are you sure?" he asks, his gaze steady on me.

"Yes," I reply tersely, turning away from him and toward the forest, wrapping my arms around myself.

"Yelena," he says softly, pulling me out of my reverie. His gaze is intense as he looks at me. There is a weight in his eyes that makes my stomach flutter.

“Tell me about your life. What’s it like living in the city?”

I exhale and look away. What can I possibly tell him? I’ve spent years building a life that doesn’t involve him. That he can’t know about.

Still, at least talking about this will distract him from what happened at Callie’s.

“I’m a nurse. It’s good work. I get to help people every day. I’m good at that,” I say softly.

He smiles at me and then moves over to the large rock next to the tree, hopping up on it and sitting down. He pats the spot next to him, inviting me to join him, but I hesitate.

“I bet you’re excellent at nursing. You’ve always been so compassionate,” he says.

I can't help but soften at his words. They sound so…genuine.

I blink back tears, surprised at my sudden onslaught of emotions. It's been so long since I've heard such praise, especially from him. For a moment, I want to let everything out, pour my fears and worries into his ears and seek comfort.

But I can’t. I have to keep Cleo safe.

“Thank you,” I murmur, choosing to stay standing. His gaze remains on me, soft and patient. It's almost unbearable. Who is this version of Austin? And where was he when I needed him five years ago?

Austin seems to feel it too, as he turns to look at me, his expression contemplative. “Do you miss this?” he asks, gesturing toward the forest with a sweep of his hand.

I pause before answering, drinking in our surroundings: the tall trees, the smell of the pinecones that litter the forest floor, the distant sound of the babbling brook.

“Of course I do,” I whisper.

Reluctantly, I move to sit next to him on the rock. The action feels so familiar and comforting. It ignites a bittersweet ache in my chest. We’re close enough to touch and yet…the divide between us feels deeper than ever.

We sit in silence for a moment, the sounds of the forest enveloping us. I can hear the rustling of leaves against each other, the chirping of distant birds, the sighing wind through the trees. It's peaceful, and for a fleeting moment, I let myself forget about my worries.

I’m home. Here on pack lands. With Austin. It feels like…home.

"It must be hard, though," Austin says after a while, "to live among humans. Not have the Pack."

I look at him, surprised at his words. He's looking straight ahead, seemingly lost in thought.

"It was hard," I admit quietly. "At first. But then...I adapted."

His gaze flickers to me, and he nods thoughtfully. "I can't imagine it. Not feeling the pull of the moon every night...not having the surrounding pack."

The words hang in the air, heavy and poignant. They tug at my heart, a reminder of what we once were—what we once had. I turn my gaze back to the forest in front of us, swallowing down the lump in my throat.

"I didn't say it was easy," I correct him gently. "It was...lonely. But when you're alone, you figure things out."

He meets my gaze again, and there's something there that I can't decipher. Regret, maybe? "Like what?"

I shrug. "Like who you are without all of this." I gesture vaguely to the surrounding trees.

His eyes flicker with something unreadable and he looks away, out into the forest we used to roam together. "You know...you can always come home. The pack would welcome you back," he swallows hard and turns to me. “ I would welcome you back.”

I stare at him, the moment charged with tension. A bitter laugh escapes my lips before I can control it, and he looks away.

If only he knew the choices, I am facing right now.

“Unless you have a reason to stay with the humans, of course,” he adds, brushing the pine needles off his shorts. “Do you have a mate among them?”

I blush and look away. The last thing I want to do is discuss my dating life with Austin.

“Are you ready for your ascension to Alpha?” I ask, avoiding the question. “The ceremony will be soon. Once you’ve completed your mating to…Sylvie.”

“I think I am as ready as I’ll ever be,” he says abruptly. “I’ve trained under my father for years. The transition should be smooth, with minimal disruption to the pack. Will you stay for the ceremony?”

The idea of watching Austin complete the mating ceremony with Sylvie and take his rightful place as Alpha of our pack with her by his side actually makes me feel physically ill.

But I can’t deny him this. I’m not strong enough to resist it. So, even though I know it will hurt, I nod my head.

“I’d be glad to be there for you,” I say softly. “You’ll make an excellent Alpha, Austin. I’ve always known that. And Sylvie, she will be a good Luna.”

Austin coughs. “Perhaps. But she doesn’t come to the role as naturally as you did, and my parents haven’t warmed up to her yet.” He elbows me, and I look over at him in surprise. “I think they’ve always held out hope that you’d come back.”

I look away. It does us no good to talk like that. Not with things the way they are.

“Do you ever think about when we were kids?” he asks suddenly.

I blink at the change of conversation, but I give him a small smile. “Sometimes. We had so many adventures in these woods.”

He brightens and nods. “That time we ran all the way to the waterfalls and then got lost coming home. My father was so mad at me.”

I raise my eyebrows. “Why? It’s not like we left pack lands. He met us at the gate, and he gave me some snacks since I was so hungry. He didn’t seem angry at all!”

He turns to me in surprise. “He was mad because I could have hurt you. You could have been injured because of my irresponsible behavior.”

I think about that for a moment. I knew the Alpha and Luna were fond of me, but I had no idea that my safety had been such a high priority for them when Austin and I were kids.

“I had no idea,” I admit, toeing my foot in the dirt.

“They’ve always adored you,” Austin adds.

“It was hard to leave them. They are a good Alpha and Luna pair. They lead us well,” I say.

Something in his expression softens. For a moment, I wonder if there is an understanding in him that wasn't there before.

"I never knew you felt so conflicted about leaving," he says quietly, almost to himself. There's an odd regret in his tone that throws me off balance again.

My gaze flickers to his face before I return to staring at the darkness of the forest. "Not everything is meant to be shared," I reply cryptically. “Some wounds are better left untouched.”

"Maybe," Austin says. I sense him shifting next to me on the rock, turning his body toward mine. "But perhaps sharing could've made the burden easier for both of us."

It’s an unexpected level of honesty from Austin, and the pull I feel toward him seems stronger than ever.

He’s so close. My wolf is desperate for us to touch, brush hands, anything. I look down at his lips for a moment, wondering for a brief second what it would feel like if he kissed me again.

But the image of Sylvie sneering at me earlier pops into my mind.

He’s not mine. I gave him up and moved on. He’s promised to Sylvie. I have to accept that.

I exhale and look away.

"I think we've both carried our burdens long enough," I say, forcing an impartial tone. "It's time to move on."

"I agree," Austin replies, his voice quiet yet firm. "That includes finding happiness."

My heart clenches at his words. I look at him sharply and see that he is still looking out at the forest, his expression unreadable.

"Happiness..." I repeat softly, a sad smile on my face. That seems like a concept so far removed from the reality I’m being forced to accept. Ever since we were paired, I’ve associated happiness with him.

"Yes," Austin says, turning to look at me again. His gaze is intense, filled with emotions I can’t quite decipher. "You deserve it, you know. We both do."

He sighs and looks away. “It’s funny, you know,” he says. “But the happiest times in my life are the moments I’ve spent with you.”

“I…” I start but then close my mouth. What can I say to that? Do I even believe it myself? What does it even mean?

"We should probably head back," I mutter, breaking the silence that had settled between us. I can feel his gaze on me, but I do not meet his eyes.

“Yelena, wait,” he whispers, reaching out to touch my arm. An electric jolt shoots through me at his touch, and my wolf howls within my chest.

I look down at his hand and then up at his face.

His eyes look wild with need and emotion, and it confuses me. What does he want from me? How can he look at me like this?

“What is it?” I ask, breathless. I couldn’t move, even if I wanted to. Not right now. I’m captured in his spell.

He reaches over slowly, cupping my cheek with his large, warm hand. A shiver moves down my spine, and I bite my lip. My heart is pounding wildly in my chest, and anticipation coils tightly within me.

He takes a deep breath, his hand still cradling my cheek. His thumb brushes comforting circles over my skin and it’s making me feel out of control.

When he leans toward me, I freeze. Is this happening right now?

The first brush of his lips against mine feels like white hot fire spreading through my veins. It awakens something deep in my soul, and I can’t resist it.

My body responds instinctively, and I lean into him. His fingers tangle in my hair, pulling me closer. The heat of his mouth against mine, the way his body feels hard and warm against me, it’s everything. It makes me forget everything else.

I forget Sylvie. I forget the pack. I forget our impending separation, the ceremony, everything. All that matters is here; this moment, this connection.

I gasp at the intensity of his kiss, and he takes advantage, deepening the kiss until I'm dizzy.

I moan when his free hand anchors onto me, wrapping around my waist to pull me flush against him. Every single contact point between us sends waves of pleasure through me, making me feel alive in a way I haven't felt for a long time.

Suddenly, he pulls away, and my heart stutters as if missing a beat. The loss of his touch and warmth throws me off balance.

He looks at me as if he’s trying to read into my soul. For a moment, I had let my guard down and let him see everything. The sorrow, the longing, and yes, even the glint of desire and love that I still have for him.

“Yelena…” he whispers again. His voice is a desperate plea, heavy with emotion and vulnerability. I break the gaze, hopping off the rock.

“We need to go,” I say firmly. “We have the rest of the Rites to attend to.”

My lips are still tingling when I shift, picking up my clothes in my mouth and heading toward the pack’s lands. I don’t wait for him, but he’s soon running beside me. The tension between us is palpable, a visceral reminder of what we once had and what we can no longer have.

In my heart, I know I shouldn’t have kissed him back, but the truth is, he’s my mate. I couldn’t have resisted him if I tried.