Page 34 of Rebound

“We’ll be okay,” I say, mostly for myself, and to assure him everything will be okay.

“Yeah, Lotus. We’ll be okay.”

For the first time in a long time, I love the way it feels to be called Lotus by this man. Despite my best intentions, I know this thing between us could be good.

If I just let it.

Twelve. Your Highness

Patrick

Then

Exploring the camp property with Tamara has become my favourite thing to do. She’s the one jumping at the chance to get away from everyone else while I’m always putting my gear on for another game. I love hockey, but I think I might love Tamara more. I told my Ammachi about these feelings last year and she said it’s just a crush. I don’t know what it means, just that I feel something so intense for her. For most of my life, the only girl I hugged or held hands with was my little sister, Nina. Then camp introduced me to tons of other girls.

None of them mattered the minute I met Tamara.

“That cloud looks like it’s trying to eat the other one,” she says, one arm stretched to the sky as her head tilts towards mine.

I smile and look at her. We’ve been lying in the grass for an hour, at least. Time means nothing at summer camp. Especially when I’m with Tamara. My Lotus. We found this place a few days ago and it’s hidden away by a large abandoned shed. We went in there too, but after she scared me and I peed my pants, we’ve decided never to go back in there. I was embarrassed, obviously, but she insisted it happens to everyone. Tamara doesn’t pee her pants. She always looks perfect.

“Is it a dinosaur of some kind or maybe it’s just a dog.”

I look up at the bright blue sky scattered with thick clouds. This is her thing and I’m just along for the ride. Her imagination keeps us entertained and it’s fine with me. Less time for me to think and more to focus on her.

“If you were a dog, what would you be?” I ask and she laughs. It’s a melodic sound that ends with a quiet snort. She always covers her mouth and nose after, but like her telling me peeing is normal, I tell her snorting is too.

“My Velliamma would say I’m a Pomeranian. Chatty and easily excitable.”

“Pomeranians are also annoying and you are not annoying.”

She beams at the compliment and turns onto her side. “You’d be a golden retriever.”

“Not an Alsatian or Doberman or something?”

“You want to be a scary dog?”

I turn to face her. “They’re only scary if you treat them badly. My Appacha had two Alsatians when I was little and they were really friendly.”

“But you’re such a happy boy, Trick. Like a Golden Retriever.”

My smile threatens to rip my face in two. “I think you’re a Golden Retriever. I can be a Labrador.”

She giggles and leans in to rub her nose against mine. “They’re a perfect match, so I accept.”

My heart races and I feel warm everywhere. I don’t know how to put these feelings into words or to explain it the right way. What I do know is Tamara is my best friend and one day, I hope to marry her. That’s what Appa said about Amma—even though they were strangers at first, they became best friends. She’s also the love of his life. Maybe Tamara will be mine.

“It’s a crocodile! Look at the jaw, it’s about to eat the other animal.”

I don’t look at the sky as she continues narrating the story of cloud animals. My entire focus is on her. On the light brown dots on her cheeks and nose from too much sun. The stray curl that’s longer than the rest of her hair. And definitely how her lips always sparkle, no matter the time of day.

If I look away, I might miss out on all the things that make my heart go badoom-boom.

Now

After our breakfast meeting—calling it anything else would be foolish—I returned to Elias’s house. As much as this is our new normal, I didn’t want to force myself into her life instantly. I even told Tamara to pick when I could move my stuff in and she waited two whole days before texting me.

Lotus