Page 5

Nikki

T he elevator ride up to my hotel room felt odd. I wasn’t the same woman who’d gone down this elevator just a couple of hours ago. Hell, I wasn’t the same woman who checked in less than twenty-four hours ago. Everything I thought I knew about the past six years of my life, the night my daughter was conceived, was all wrong.

Logan hadn’t simply ghosted on me. He’d felt the same connection I had, but a simple twist of fate had kept us apart. That was kind of romantic, but it was overshadowed by the appearance of the Blood Fangs MC. Any thoughts of picking up where we left off, dating and getting reacquainted with one another, had been wiped away with the threats issued by those dangerous bikers.

It was a lot to take in, and I had no idea what to digest first.

I needed a long, hot shower and at least thirty minutes alone with a couple of fingers of bourbon. And eight hours of deep sleep, something I never got as a single mother to an energetic five-year-old.

“Oh. My. God. Tell me everything!” Mia was in my face the minute I opened the door. “Was he as gorgeous as you remember? Did you kiss him? Punch him? Did he say why he ghosted you?”

I put my hands on my best friend’s shoulders and forced her to calm her breathing. “Chill out, Mia.”

“I can’t chill out! You’ve been pining after this man, wishing harm upon him and so much more for years. I need to know what the hell happened?”

“He said he left a note with his number on the nightstand, and he was upset that I never reached out.” I shook my head, still unable to believe his words but the sadness and disappointment in his eyes told me it was the truth. “Something happened between the shower and food being delivered and we had no way to reach one another. So, that’s what happened.”

“And you believe him?”

“I believe him,” I answered.

Mia contemplated my words with a slow nod. “Okay, and you told him about Liv?”

“No,” I sighed. “The timing didn’t feel right, but I’m going to tell him. I have to.” I couldn’t keep it from him considering the Blood Fangs were after me, and would no doubt also be after my daughter.

“Okay, but hear me out.” She held out both of her hands and went to the wooden chest of drawers where the television sat, pouring from the bottle of bourbon she’d bought to help us unwind after the long days in the booth.

“I’m listening.”

“Do you think it’s a good idea to let him back into your life and into Liv’s life so easily?”

My brows dipped in confusion, and I felt a flash of anger take over. “What the hell, Mia? You’ve been nagging me for years to track him down, to find him so that Livvy could have the daddy she desperately wants.”

“I know and I’m sorry, but I’m just being cautious.”

“I get it but keeping her a secret isn’t a long term plan.” I sucked in a breath, fully prepared to explain about the Blood Fangs, but Mia had a one track mind.

“How did he look,” she asked, hungry for details.

“Gorgeous. Better than he did the night we met. He’s more mature, has bigger muscles, and he is just so utterly comfortable in his own skin that it’s impossible to look away.”

“God, that is so sexy. Does he have a brother?”

Plenty, I thought but kept it to myself. “Not that I know of, but I need to keep my distance. I need a clear head so that I can tell him about Livvy and lay out terms of being in her life.” Not that Logan seemed to be a man who would adhere to terms. Or rules.

“Well, did you kiss?”

“No Mia, we didn’t kiss.” I needed to tell her about the bikers. She needed to know, not just because she was my producer and my best friend, but also because she often took care of Livvy. “The Blood Fangs MC showed up. They’re not happy with me.” Over another glass of bourbon, I told her all about the photos and video I took, how Logan had intervened, and what happened at the Black Jack Bar.

Her eyes widened comically. “They followed you?”

“I’m not sure, but they made sure I understood their threats loud and clear.” I shuddered at the way they’d been so casual in their threats. My hand went to the exact spot where his slap had landed. “It was an experience.”

“Holy shit, Nikki!”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “I know.” It wasn’t easy to talk about, but after another drink, the details spilled from my lips as if I was talking about the weather. “Logan or should I say Rebel, is worried that this isn’t the end of things, and I believe him.”

“How did your life suddenly turn into an action film?”

I shrugged. “Good luck, I suppose.” We talked some more and drank some more before we both drifted off to sleep.

***

The morning alarm came far too soon, but this was the last day of the festival, and I planned to put on a damn good show—then head home and decompress for the next forty-eight hours. After a quick shower and copious amounts of coffee, we made it to the site in good time.

“You ready?” Mia poked her head into the studio the way she always did, a reassuring smile on her face.

“As ready as I can be after recent events.”

“Excellent.” She gave me a thumbs up. “You got this. I’ll be right there if you need me.” She pointed to the tiny production booth with an uneasy smile.

“Thanks.” The show was going well, the live vibe really made it even more amazing than the usual weekday shows. “That Rolling Stones tune never fails to get me deep into my feels, you know what I mean?” A smile spread across my face, and in that moment I felt more relaxed than I had since before I met Logan at the bar last night. “Next caller, you’re up!”

“Hey Nikki, this is Bonsai, and I have to tell you there’s nothing hotter than the smooth, honeyed voice of a woman who loves the open road and classic rock.”

“Well, thank you Bonsai.”

“I love listening to your stories and the other listeners, and if anyone needs a ride west my rig takes off just before midnight.”

I laughed at his irreverence. “Well you heard the man, folks. And this one is for you Bonsai.” I played another classic road tune, one of the last of the set before I could officially pack us up and head back to the city, putting this crazy weekend behind me.

More calls came in from people within the radio station’s reach and even some attending the festival. I smiled and laughed, listened to their stories, and shared a few of my own. It was exactly what this festival was supposed to be about, community and truth.

Mia tapped on the screen between us. “One more call.” She mouthed the words to me, and I nodded.

“Okay ladies and gents of the road, we have time for one more call so let’s make it a good one. Caller, you’re on the air.”

The line fell silent for several long moments before a gravelly voice filled the air. “Nosy reporters ought to mind their fucking business,” he began, his tone grew angrier by the second. “If she doesn’t stop poking her nose where it don’t belong, she might just find that sexy little body buried in the desert with countless others.” The line went dead the moment the last syllable was spoken.

My heart raced in my chest, and I couldn’t breathe as fear gripped me. Those men, the Blood Fangs MC were out to get me, and I had no choice but to take their threats seriously. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Mia standing up, and that moved me into action. I slapped on a smile and leaned in close to the mic. “Sounds like someone isn’t too happy about… something. Maybe a few covers from local rock band, The Speak Easys, will help. See you on the other side.”

Mia burst into the studio with wide, frantic eyes, arms folded and a look of pure worry on her face. “What the fuck was that?”

I shrugged and ignored the way my heart hammered in my chest. The biker’s words echoed in my mind, the dark warning, the anger that strained every syllable he spoke. “That was my new fan club,” I deadpanned.

“That dude sounded seriously pissed off.”

I nodded. “Yeah, I think that little stunt put a bigger target on my back than I realized.” Logan’s words came back haunt me, and I swallowed the lump of fear that settled in my throat.

Mia nibbled on her bottom lip, which she only did when she was really nervous and worried. “Part of me wants to brush this off as good entertainment, but that guy sounded too serious and seriously dangerous.” She studied me for a long minute. “Are you thinking about posting the video?”

Was I? “Kind of, yeah. I mean at this point just so that it’s out there just in case something happens to me. On the other hand, it feels like I’d be poking the big, bad biker bear.”

“Hard agree on both counts. How about we table it for now and discuss it in our production meeting when we get back to the city?” Her mind was already spinning with ideas, I was sure.

“Yeah, okay. Let’s table it for now.”

The song had finished and it was time for me to get back on the mic and give the listeners the full Nikki experience. “Okay so now that we’re all a little calmer, let’s talk about fleeting connections made on the road. Any connection, as long as it’s fleeting, is on topic so call and give me all the deets.”

The rest of the show passed in a blur, and for the first time since my very first time on air, I felt nervous, ill at ease, and unfocused. Eventually the second half of the final show was over, and I was off air.

“Hey,” Mia called after I signed off, her brows dipped in concern. “Call me in fifteen minutes to make sure you’re all right.”

I rolled my eyes, but I appreciated the gesture. “Sure, no problem. Livvy is with the sitter this evening, so I’ll see you later.”

“Next year I’m bringing a second producer.”

I smiled. “You said the same thing last year, but let’s face it, you love being in the thick of things.”

She flashed a smile. “Maybe. Talk to you in fifteen.”

***

When I exited the studio, this time I no longer felt light or carefree. I was worried and paranoid, looking over my shoulder and scanning every face in the crowd for signs of danger. None appeared—of course—which only made me feel more ridiculous for the scream I let out when my phone buzzed in my pocket. “Sorry,” I mouthed to the curious people who looked my way before I turned my attention to my phone.

Rebel: Hey let’s grab a drink at the Hippie Hut on the south end of the grounds. They have normal beer. I checked. See you there.

I stared at the screen with a frown. He hadn’t asked if I wanted to meet him, just demanded it, and even though I was annoyed—as hell—I found myself heading to the Hippie Hut. They were a tiki style bar with several locations in Nevada and dozens throughout the southwest, and they were good people who made good beer, and sometimes aired commercials during Highway Pulse. I smoothed my hand over my jeans and fluffed my hair as the strains of Creedence Clearwater Revival grew louder and louder.

“Stop!” I admonished myself and shook off the desire to check my reflection or touch up my lips. This was just a beer with my baby daddy who didn’t know he was a baby daddy yet. It wasn’t a date.

“Nikki!” Rebel, I mean Logan, stood and raised a hand from his spot at the far end of the bar. Damn he was delicious . I wondered how many times I’d have to see him before I was really used to how good looking he was. The leather vest he wore did nothing to tamp down his insane level of hotness, in fact it only increased his bad boy appeal, which I was far too old and too wise to actually find appealing.

Wasn’t I?

I better be, I told myself and fixed a smile on my face before I went to greet him. “Logan. Hey.” I looked around the familiar surroundings and slowly my smile felt less fake and more sincere. “Doesn’t really seem like your kind of place.”

A fantastic smile split his face as he let out a loud, deep chuckle. “Maybe not regularly but I’ve known Hap and Honey for a few years now. They ran into some trouble a few years back and came to us for help.”

That surprised me. “Interesting.” I turned to Honey with a big smile. “I’ll have that NEIPA you’ve been bragging about all weekend.”

She laughed, and a gleam lit her pale blue eyes. “I’ll make it two.”

“Perfect, thanks.” I turned back to Logan and his amused expression. “What?”

“Nothing,” he shrugged. “You’re different than I remember you. In some ways, but so much is just how I remember you.”

I blinked in surprise. “You remembered me?” That shouldn’t surprise me, and I shouldn’t be so happy about it.

“Yeah, of course.” He accepted his beer with a grin as he shook his head. “I didn’t just remember you, I thought about you over the years. More than I should.”

Same. “I can admit that thoughts of you crossed my mind as well.” A lot. Too much, but in my defense, I carried his baby for nine months and saw his eyes every single time Livvy looked at me. “And now we’re here. It’s odd.”

He smiled around his beer bottle. “Now we’re here and it’s not as odd as it should be. Right?”

I knew what he meant. Being around Logan was like it had been all those years ago, so easy and relaxing. “Yeah.” My phone buzzed on the counter, and I picked it up with a smile, before I shot off a quick reply.

“Everything all right?”

My shoulders rose and fell. “My producer and best friend was just reminding me that I was late with my fifteen minute check-in. She’s worried after that call that came in earlier.”

He nodded. “That’s part of why I wanted to see you.” He paused and let his gaze rake over my body before his tongue slipped out to wet his bottom lip. “I heard the show.”

“Then you heard the angry caller?”

He nodded. “The Blood Fangs are seriously dangerous fuckers, Nikki, and they don’t issue idle threats. You need to be careful, and I don’t mean check your backseat and walk with your keys between your fingers.”

“Good because I already do that. You can’t be too safe these days.”

“You need to be more than careful Nikki, you have to be alert. Listen to your gut and respond accordingly.” His eyes darkened, his expression terrifyingly serious, which left me no choice but to nod.

“Yeah, okay. I will.” I had no choice but to take his warning seriously. Livvy relied on me and I wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Ever. “I promise.”

That green gaze stared at me as if he could see and read every thought in my mind, which was slightly terrifying but even still, I couldn’t look away. “Good. Let’s finish our beers and I’ll walk you back to your hotel.”

I inhaled a deep breath before it escaped on a slow exhale as I nodded. “That’s nice but unnecessary.”

“It’s nice and totally necessary. I don’t want anything to happen to you Nikki.”

My legs went a little weak at that sweet proclamation and the heat in his eyes. “Okay, then. A walk back would be great.”

“Good.”

The walk through the festival was mostly quiet. I was lost in my own thoughts and Logan stuck close to me through the chaos. Eventually the roar of the music and the crowds faded as we left the festival grounds behind. “Are you staying nearby?”

“Nah, we’re staying at a place off the highway. Never can be too sure who attends these things.”

I stopped and turned to watch his face. “So in addition to being do-gooders you guys are into some serious shit too?”

He shrugged as if it was no big deal. “Not everything we do is exactly on the right side of the law, which attracts some negative attention. But we also help people the law won’t or can’t, which also isn’t exactly legal.”

Good point, dammit. “I’m just asking questions. Call it natural curiosity.” I flashed a half-smile and started walking again and he stayed right at my side.

His dark brows jumped up. “Yeah? Because it sounded kind of like judgment.”

“It wasn’t judgment, I just didn’t realize. There are too many motorcycle clubs with too many different purposes to keep track of. Given the topic of my show, I’ve heard about them all, and I just wanted to know which group the Steel Demons fell into.”

“We’re in a league of our own, babe.” His tone was teasing but I had a feeling he meant it too. “We have plenty of what you’d call real businesses, and a few we don’t talk about too loudly. Off the record.”

“Of course.” I rolled my eyes. “Do you like it?”

“Nah, I love it.” The way his face lit up was proof of his answer. “Those men are my best friends, my brothers. We have each other’s back even when we’re pissed off at each other.”

“That’s amazing. My friend Mia is that for me.”

His brows dipped. “What about your dad? I remember you talked about him a lot while we drank.”

He’d remembered that too, and I had to look away. “Dad died about three years ago.” He’d lived just long enough to meet his namesake granddaughter and get to know her. “Cancer came on suddenly and spread fast. And then he was gone.”

“Shit, Nikki. I’m sorry to hear that. It sounded like you two were close.”

“We were. He was all I had.” Until Livvy, but I couldn’t say that. Not yet. The conversation was becoming too emotional, so I smiled and stopped at the bottom of the steps of the hotel. “We’re here. Thanks for being my walking buddy.”

His lips pulled up into a crooked grin and I couldn’t look away. I remembered what they tasted like. His bottom lip was a bit plumper than the top which only made me hungrier for a taste. “You shouldn’t look at me like that.” His voice was a low, growled warning.

I felt that growl as it slithered down my spine and wrapped around my waist like a caress. I blinked away the fog of lust. “Like what?”

“Like you’re remembering.” One hand went to the braid that hung over my shoulder and he gave it a gentle tug. “That night.”

My eyes fluttered closed. “Maybe I am.” I had never stopped, and that was the truth.

“Nikki.” He grabbed the back of my head and lowered his lips. “Tell me to stop.”

“Okay,” I breathed. “Don’t stop.”

He growled again but it was abruptly cut off when his lips crushed against mine, kissing me as if we were long lost lovers. He kissed me hungrily, like he’d been dreaming about kissing me for a century and now that he had his shot, he wasn’t going to go easy on me.

My arms wrapped around him instinctively, my body pressed against his so tight that not even a breeze could pass between us, and I moaned as our tongues touched. He smelled like sandalwood, bergamot, and a pinch of citrus, and he tasted like beer and sexy biker. It was a heady, intoxicating mix that I found completely irresistible.

I wasn’t sure which of us pulled back first, but suddenly we stared at each other with wide eyes and heaving chests. “Fuck,” he bit out first.

I took a step back. That wasn’t exactly what a woman wanted to hear after a kiss that turned her world upside down.

He reached out for me and pulled me closer. “I just… shit, I wasn’t expecting it to still be like that.”

“Me either. We can ignore it if you want, I doubt we’ll cross paths again anytime soon.” It wasn’t what I wanted, I knew that without a doubt, but it wasn’t just up to me. If it’s what he wanted, I could do it. I’d already spent the past six years without him, what was a lifetime? Doable, it was doable.

“Nah,” he finally said, a playful grin curled his lips. “You ain’t gettin’ rid of me that easily. I’ll see you soon Nikki.” He pressed a hard kiss to my lips before he spun me away from him and gave me a soft shove towards the hotel entrance.

My legs felt shaky as I crossed the lobby towards the elevators and my lips tingled from the feel of his kiss and the scrape of his scruff. I shouldn’t have kissed him . It was crazy to think we could pick things up after all those years apart, even without the secret I carried. I told myself it was just hormones and a desperately starved for attention libido.

Still, I touched my lips as the elevator doors slid closed, because I knew that incredible kiss would get me through the next few days. At least.