Page 27

Nikki

“W hat are we doin’ today, Mommy?” Livvy was excited first thing in the morning, the same way she always was, especially over the past week that we had been staying at the clubhouse. There were always kids around for her to play with, a slobbery dog she loved, and half a dozen women to mother her when I wasn’t around. She was in heaven.

“I don’t know. How do you feel about a girls’ day? We could get our nails done, maybe get one of those oatmeal facials. What do you say?”

Her eyes rounded in shock. “Yeah?”

“Yeah, why not?” It was still early, and the clubhouse was quiet but there were stirrings of other people. It was my day off and the plan was to spend as much of the day as possible away from the clubhouse. And Logan.

“And can we do lunch too?”

I bit back a laugh. She was so damn cute when she repeated things she heard without context. “Yes, Livvy, we can absolutely do lunch too.”

She squirmed excitedly and bounced on the bed. “Love you Mommy.”

“Love you too, baby. Now let’s get ready for the day!” Once we were dressed and ready to go, the hard part was making it out of the clubhouse without being spotted. It wasn’t that I didn’t take the threats seriously, but I hated feeling like I needed a babysitter all the time.

“Good morning!” Maybe I should have let Livvy in on the plan to sneak out because her greeting turned six sets of eyes on us.

“Good morning, Livvy. Sleep well?”

“Uh-huh, I slept like a bear,” she offered, drawing laughter from the other women.

They sat together at a table with a legal pad, which immediately drew my attention. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, we’re going to have a barbecue today and we’re putting together a list of supplies we’ll need.” Ellie’s eyes raked over us both. “Where are you headed?”

“Girls’ day,” Livvy shouted.

“Yep. We figured we could use some fresh air and time together.” I didn’t want to offend the women who had been nothing but nice and welcoming, but I needed to get the hell out of here.

Ellie stood and came closer to me, worry darkening her eyes. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

My instinct was to tell her to mind her own business, instead I nodded. “Yeah. They haven’t been following me from the clubhouse and besides that, they wouldn’t be stupid enough to try anything in broad daylight.”

“Maybe not, but you should assume they are always following you, Nikki. They know it’s your day off, I’m sure of that.” She softened her expression. “Look, I know it isn’t ideal going from work to the clubhouse every single day, but you should always act as if they can get to you, even if you don’t believe it.”

“I appreciate that Ellie, I really do, but it’s not good for Livvy to be stuck inside all day. She’s missing kindergarten as it is.”

“But she has other kids to talk to so she’s getting the socialization she needs, and she’ll be outside most of the day today for the barbecue.”

Livvy would love that, but I wouldn’t. I felt like I was being handled, or worse, steamrolled—again—to do something I didn’t want to do. “Thanks, but I need to get out of here Ellie.”

Sympathy swam in her eyes, and she nodded. “You need some time to yourself. Then how about you go out for a few hours, clear your head, and come back with your appetite. We’ll all watch Livvy, I promise.”

I opened my mouth ready to refuse the offer, but Livvy was already with the kids, laughing and chatting, her girls’ day already forgotten. “Fine. Livvy come here for a second.”

Her smile faded as she closed the gap between us. “Yes, Mommy?”

“You want to stay here with Ashlyn and Sophie, don’t you?”

She flashed a guilty smile. “Kinda. Is that okay?”

“Yeah honey, it’s okay. I’m going to run a few errands. Be good for Ellie and Peyton while I’m gone, okay?”

“I will. Have fun, Mommy.” She hugged me tight and then ran off to be with her friends.

Confident that my daughter was safe, I made my way to my car and started to drive. It felt unnatural to be out alone on my day off. Leaving Livvy behind didn’t sit right with me, but I did it, not because she wanted to stay behind, but because Ellie was right—she would be safer at the clubhouse.

***

I drove for an hour on the highway until my thoughts began to settle, and then I drove for another hour. It would be easy to put the blame on Logan for my life being turned on its ass, but this wasn’t his fault. Hell it wasn’t even my fault, which made it even more impossible to accept. “No, it doesn’t. I have to accept it.” I repeated those words out loud several times, but I still didn’t believe them. Not yet.

On the upside, it looked like Logan was never going to forgive me so that was one less thing to worry about. He loved Livvy and things would be tense during exchanges, but that was just a few minutes a week. Right? Sure, there was a time, a brief moment, when I thought we could be more, like a big happy family but that wasn’t an option.

It was fine.

I was fine with it.

I had a career that I loved, mostly, and the best, smartest and most loving little girl in the whole world, not to mention an awesome best friend. I didn’t need anything else.

Except for the Blood Fangs to leave me alone. That would be really fucking great, actually.

My life was, or would be, complicated enough having to share Livvy with Logan. It was what I wanted, more importantly it was what she wanted, and as long as he continued to love and care for her the way he did, I would be happy.

I’d finally got the nerve to tell Livvy about Logan being her father. I’d been worried about how she would take it, but like everything else in her short life, she took it in stride. She was overjoyed to learn he was her father. That’s what mattered, that she was happy, I told myself.

Very happy.

That seemed like the only clarity this drive would give me, so I exited the highway and looped back around in the opposite direction and headed home. My home.

It was time. Not only were Livvy and I running low on clothes, but I needed to get a proper look at the place and talk to an insurance adjuster. I drove through my neighborhood, smiling at the kids who played happily in their yards and rode bikes in the middle of the street. The few seniors who lived in the area gathered on a wraparound front porch with a large pitcher of tea with just a nip of whiskey in it. This was our home. It was where we belonged.

That’s what I wanted to believe, but the giant red spray painted letters that warned me I was next, said I was dead wrong. Again. Instead of stopping completely, I sped up and drove past my home as if it wasn’t mine, but not before snapping a few photos.

The Blood Fangs were making my life miserable, and it was time that I stopped letting things happen to me and started making plans. Ignoring a call from Logan, I turned onto the main street and continued driving. Leaving Steel City and heading in the direction of Vegas, something about the bright lights of the city always cheered me up. So thirty minutes later I was sitting at a table at my favorite buffet on The Strip. I started with a steak salad, enjoying the charred beef while I ignored another text, first from Mia and then Logan.

Logan texted two more times while I enjoyed my fried chicken and mashed potatoes with a side of macaroni and cheese. It was carb heavy, and I’d regret it tomorrow, but right now it felt like bliss. Just me, my thoughts, and more food than any person could eat in twenty-four hours. It was almost… peaceful.

At least it would have been if my phone hadn’t buzzed like there was an alien invasion happening outside. They could all wait until I was good and damn well ready to talk to them.

Later.

Much, much later.