Page 52

Brynla

I’m half-asleep when a shouting match makes me jolt.

When the walls shake, as if someone is being thrown around in the hall outside my room, I leap out of bed, tangled in the sheets.

Lemi comes in from the balcony and lets out a low growl, but I quickly motion for him to be quiet as I scurry toward the door.

I rest my ear against it, wishing I could lock it without someone noticing from the other side.

I hear Andor’s voice.

Then his uncle’s.

Something about…

A princess?

He’s jeopardizing his relationship with the princess?

I swallow hard, a sinking feeling in my stomach, almost afraid to keep listening. But I have to.

I hear his father’s voice now, yelling at Andor.

Lemi lets out another growl, coming toward the door.

I motion for him to be quiet again, straining to hear the rest of the conversation.

They’re arguing about something…me, I think.

Then there’s another thud against the wall, enough that I leap back from the door, terrified that they’re going to come in here.

I look around the room for my swords but they’re nowhere in sight.

The room is a mess since I’ve done nothing but cry and stay in bed since we got off the ship.

I can’t even remember the last time I saw my weapons.

I rub my hands over my face, panic surging through me as I struggle to think, to feel even remotely competent.

I can’t stay in a stupor of grief like this forever, as tempting as it is to drown in it.

I’m still in the Kolbecks’ keep, and though I have Andor on my side, this is a hostile place and I need to keep my eyes open and my defenses up.

I hear someone, maybe his uncle, grumble something, and then footsteps fading away.

I rest my head against the door, willing my heart to calm down and waiting a full minute before I dare open it and glance outside.

The knob turns with a loud click that makes me wince, but when I poke my head out, the hallway is empty. The only sign anyone was here is a painting on the floor, having been knocked off the wall.

I know I should close the door and go back to bed. Forget the whole thing.

But I can’t. Because his uncle had mentioned Andor’s relationship with a princess and this is the first I’ve heard about this.

Could it be possible that he’s had someone else this whole time? A princess, at that?

That sinking feeling grows deeper now, a gash inside me that makes me feel sick and weak. But I can’t let my insecurities run away on me; I can’t assume anything from only hearing a snippet of an argument.

Against my better judgment I slip on my nightgown plus a pair of slippers and head out into the hall.

Lemi tries to follow but I motion for him to go back inside the room.

I know he’ll shift if I get into trouble, but I don’t want him giving my whereabouts away, or getting protective before he should.

My dog gives me a wary look but resigns himself to sitting by the door as I gently close it and pad down the hall, listening for voices. I may not have hearing as good as someone with suen magic, but it’s still pretty good. I think I hear them downstairs.

I hurry down the staircase, looking over my shoulder in case a servant or one of the siblings spots me, then head over to the door to Torsten’s office. I place my cheek against the door like I did earlier.

“You are marrying Princess Frida!” Torsten bellows, so loud that I have to step away from the door.

Princess Frida? Who the fuck is Princess Frida? Could there be someone else in the room, Vidar maybe? That would make sense, that the heir would have to marry a princess. But not Andor.

Please, not Andor , I think hopelessly.

“This is your one and only duty in your life, Andor,” his father grinds out, and the reveal is a dagger to the heart. “Don’t you dare think you have agency. Don’t you dare think you can fuck this up for me, for your family.”

I feel like I’m bleeding out as I stand here, my hand at my stomach.

“I’m not fucking up anything,” I hear Andor finally reply.

Oh gods.

“Brynla?”

I jump and whirl around to see Steiner standing at the end of the hall, his cat perched on his shoulder.

Damn it. Just caught snooping.

But Steiner doesn’t approach me, nor does he say anything else. He just walks away, heading in the direction of his lab.

I stare at the office door, knowing it’s only a matter of time before they discover I’m eavesdropping. Now I have to make sure Steiner doesn’t say anything.

I decide to hurry down the hall after him now, moving as quickly and quietly as possible past the dining hall and the kitchen, coming into his lab just as he’s about to close the door.

“Wait,” I say, wedging my shoulder in. “I need to talk to you.”

“I assume it’s about whatever you were just spying on my father for,” he says, but he steps back from the door and lets me in.

His cat hisses at me and then jumps off his shoulder, running down the shelves that surround the room. “Don’t mind Woo-woo; he can smell Lemi on you.”

“I can explain what just happened,” I say to him, trying to catch my breath.

“Can you explain why you’re in just your nightshift?” he asks idly, glancing briefly at my chest. “You must be cold because your nipples are showing.”

I gasp, quickly folding my arms over my chest, my cheeks flaming at how casually direct Steiner is. “I overheard a fight outside my room,” I tell him. “I was curious to hear what it was about.”

He tilts his head. “And what was it about? I assume you thought it was your business?”

I give a half shrug, weighing that. “Well, more that it involved Andor…”

“And Andor is your business?”

I swallow. “I want him to be,” I admit.

Steiner gives me a tiny smile just as the door opens and Solla pokes her head into the room. Her eyes go round when she sees me.

“Sorry. I didn’t expect you to be here. Do you need privacy?” she asks, noticing the way I’m dressed.

“No,” Steiner answers. “I just caught Brynla eavesdropping outside our father’s office.”

Ah, shit. Thanks a lot , I think.

But Solla only looks curious. “Oh really?” she asks brightly, closing the door behind her as she comes into the room. “Why? What were they talking about?”

“Andor,” Steiner says.

“What about him?” Solla asks.

“We didn’t get that far,” Steiner says.

I sigh. “I heard them arguing outside my door. I heard them mention something about a princess and so I had to learn more.”

Steiner and Solla exchange a wary glance.

“So you know, then,” I say slowly, my heart feeling crushed. “Who is she? Who is Princess Frida?”

“The woman Andor is going to marry,” Steiner says.

“Steiner,” Solla chides him. She gestures to me with her eyes. “You don’t have to be so blunt,” she says under her breath. She turns and gives me an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry. I thought maybe Andor would have filled you in.”

I give my head a rough shake, as if I can shake this all away. “He never told me about her.”

“Because he doesn’t want to marry her,” she says. “Just as Vidar doesn’t want to marry whoever it is he’ll have to marry. There are things expected of us as Kolbecks. Even I will have to marry someone else and not the person I want.”

“Heda?” Steiner says to his sister in surprise. “You would marry her?”

“If I could,” Solla says.

Ah. Solla is in love with another woman?

“Are you not allowed to marry the same gender here?” I ask. Back in Esland it’s common for people to marry whoever they feel like, regardless of gender or sexuality. Even polyamorous marriages are legal in the Banished Land.

“It’s allowed…” she says carefully. “But not really accepted. Not yet. There is more tolerance in Altus Dugrell. In Vesland it’s legal. Here it’s a gray area.”

“But it doesn’t really matter since Solla is bound by our father to do as she’s told or be rejected from the family,” Steiner says. He sighs, looking completely despondent. “I’m sure I’ll be handed off to some strange woman, too.”

“This isn’t about us, though,” Solla quickly says, turning her attention back to me.

“It’s about you and Andor. I can guarantee Andor doesn’t want to marry Frida.

He’s been scheming to get out of it since the day my father promised him to the royals of Altus Dugrell.

It’s a way to create unity between the lands.

A bridge of sorts. We need the countries to be united as one, especially these days.

If he marries her, then the royals can’t turn against each other. ”

“So if he doesn’t marry her, then he’s making things worse for the lands,” I say, hating that I even have to say those words.

“It’s a sacrifice,” Steiner says. “One that none of us are happy about, especially not Andor.”

And yet he didn’t say a thing. This whole time I’ve been sleeping with him, fighting with him, risking my life alongside him, falling for him, and he’s been betrothed to someone else?

I feel flattened. Reduced. Into nothing. Like we now have nothing between us when it started to feel like we had everything.

And that’s when I really feel the weight in my stomach.

I’d begun to think about Andor as if he was always going to be around.

As if what we were doing together, this relationship or whatever it is, was not only just getting started but that it was leading somewhere.

Maybe not here in the Stormglen, but somewhere else, together.

I had hope for us, more than I let my silly brain know, that we were going in the same direction.

But he was heading in another direction all along.

“He’s coming,” Solla suddenly says, a strange white flash coming over her eyes.

“Who is?” I manage to ask.

“Andor. He’s in the hall, heading here,” she says. I suppose she has some kind of precognition along with her telekinesis. She nods at Steiner. “We should go, give them privacy.”

“It’s my lab,” Steiner protests.

“And she’s probably going to murder Andor for keeping the princess a secret,” she says. “Do you want that to happen in the hall where everyone can see?”