Page 50 of Raise Me Up

“How would you know?”I ask quietly.

“I’ve learned to read you.”

My gut churns at the idea of my thoughts and emotions laid bare to this man. But I think Liam needs the control. I think he’s been afraid of feeling too much his entire life.

Do I credit Beau for his recent shift in behavior? Or has he been working up to this for a while? Beau mentioned Liam had changed. Can we have faith that this is a permanent thing?

Submerging myself under the spray of water, I’m surprised smoke doesn’t come out of my ears with the rate my brain is spinning.

Liam waits for me to step out of the water with soapy hands. Delicately, he slicks up my wet skin. I don’t know how he could ever believe he would truly hurt anyone. So he fought back in self-defense against his dad. The man abused him. And Gavin was a notorious bully.

After Liam guides me back under the water, I return the favor and lather him in soap. He watches me silently as I wash every hard ridge of his body.

God, no one should be allowed to look like him. He’s a curse designed to leave us mortals in ruin. The death he brings isn’t swift. It’s a slow onset of pain starting in the heart. Eventually, it consumes you.

As if he can sense my inner turmoil, Liam emerges from the spray of water and flattens me against the tile wall. He brings his mouth to mine, kissing me until I’m no longer stuck on thoughts of him crushing hearts or vanishing like smoke.

Then he shuts off the water and gently towels me off, brushing light kisses all over my skin. He leaves me momentarily to grab a t-shirt and shorts from my closet, helping me slip into them.

Embarrassingly enough, my stomach growls with a vengeance.

Liam gives a low laugh. “You got anything to cook?”

“I might be horrible about grocery shopping. I do have some leftovers, though.”

We heat up the massive quesadillas I ordered for lunch and didn’t finish, accompanied by chips and salsa.

There’s something intimate about eating with another person at home. The pauses between conversation leave space for lingering stares and overwhelming emotions. Desire and happiness, tinged with a bit of fear that I may not get to have moments like these with him again.

“You know, cardboard boxes are not decorations.” Liam nods at the tower of boxes stacked precariously in the corner of my small living room. I meant to tuck those in a closet. I’m afraid if I fully unpack I’ll never make it out of here.

“I’m not gonna take advice from a man whose house is practically vacant.” I scoop salsa onto a tortilla chip and pop it into my mouth.

How easily I can transform from bedroom Stasi that wants Liam to use her as he sees fit, to old t-shirt wearing Stasi crunching on a mouthful of food.

Liam cocks a brow at me. “Don’t make me spank you.”

Heat rushes to my cheeks, the possibilities already flooding my brain. Liam sprawling me over his muscled thighs. Liam tying me up naked in his bed. Liam covering my ass with those big hands and spreading me open.

I scoop an even bigger pile of salsa onto my next chip. “So, what other kinky stuff are you into?”

He nearly spits out his drink on a cough. “The fuck has gotten into you?”

A sly grin eases onto my face. “You.”

His deep laugh has my spirit taking flight. He’s experienced so much in his life, touring the world and bedding whomever he desires. It’s nice to catch him by surprise.

“Beau, too,” I add, unable to forget the beautiful musician who snuggled me on Liam’s couch the other day.

Once Liam regains his composure, he leans over to kiss my cheek. “He’s corrupting you.”

As if summoned, my phone buzzes with a new message from an unknown number.

“I sent him your contact info,” Liam says nonchalantly, tossing a chip into his mouth.

My heart swoops as I open the message. A laugh breezes out of me. “Oh my god, look at him.”

I angle my phone to show off the selfie. Beau’s shirtless in bed, an arm curled under his head. His eyelids are hooded with sleep, but his dimples are tireless.