Page 45 of Raise Me Up

“Iris!” A laugh punches out of me.

One of the doctors peeks out of us from another patient’s room. I wince and wave a hand in apology.

Iris leans in closer. “Well, do you get to keep them?”

I sigh. It’s been a struggle to keep my emotions bottled up. I haven’t heard from Liam since the weekend. I spent last night pacing my apartment, wondering if I should text him and worried Beau hopped on a flight to Phoenix, never to be seen again.

“No one keeps Liam.Ever. And the other guy is only in town temporarily, I think.”

Why am I telling her all of this?

Because she might be the closest thing I have to a friend outside of my brother, which is pretty pathetic, considering I’ve lived in Texas my entire life.

Iris pats my arm. “Do youwant to keep them?”

The question catches me off guard. I hadn’t given much space for those thoughts. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter.

But the idea of carrying on alone has my heart sinking. I’m sick of quiet nights in my apartment. Sick of counting down the days until my brother comes home so I can have some company. Soon enough, he’ll have his boyfriend here with him, and then I’ll have to find someone else to bother.

“I think I do. Yeah.”

“Then listen to me, you little whippersnapper,” Iris says firmly.

“Whippersnapper?” I echo, frowning.

“Life is meant to be lived. Not feared. You need to speak up. Tell them what you want. Be brave. Make demands.”

I push out a long breath, sinking further into my internal despair. “You make it sound so easy.”

“As easy as you make these exercises sound. Now take me back to my chair. I’m done walking until you start talking to these men of yours.”

A call vibrates my phone on the nightstand.

It’slate.Way past the appropriate time to call someone. I’ve been lying in bed for over two hours, stuck in my head, churning on thoughts of Liam and Beau and weighing the consequences of severing relationships with my parents and how that might trickle down into the bond I’m starting to rebuild with Max, my older brother.

Shooting upright, I bobble my phone as I snatch it off my nightstand, panicked that my twin needs me.

But it’s not Hail’s name lit up on my phone.

“Hello,” I answer breathlessly.

“Hey,” Liam replies in a husky tone. “Why aren’t you asleep?”

I fall back onto my bed and stare up at the ceiling. “How do you know I wasn’t asleep? Maybe your 2 A.M. call woke me.”

“You answered on the first ring, Anastasia. Don’t get smart with me.”

A smile creeps onto my face. “Next time I’ll let you go to voicemail.”

His laugh is a hit of dopamine I didn’t realize I needed.Sorry, Iris. You’re no longer the highlight of my day.

Although, it is technically a new day…

We fall into a comfortable silence, and I mull over Iris’s words. I’m tempted to lay out what I want. Him in any form he can offer. Beau, too. But that’s not something people do in their thirties, right? College was different. You’re expected to experiment there.

And what if Liam called to end things?

Anxiously, I wait for him to speak.