Page 18 of Promise Yule Be Mine (Christmas Falls: Season 2)

18

NOVA

W ell, at least Jenna liked the flavors Kody had picked, although that was a straw man’s consolation. And I was definitely grasping at straws trying to rationalize what I was still doing here. Why I was still participating in this mess of a wedding instead of fleeing to the safety of a Kody-less New York.

“Are you okay hon?” Jenna asked.

I blinked and looked up at her. She was already looking better, not that she ever looked terrible, not even when she was sicker than a dog.

“Yeah, yeah,” I said. “Why? Don’t I look okay?”

“No. Of course not. You just…you seem lost in your own little world.”

I rolled my eyes and reached for my wine. “Maybe that’s because present company is sooo boring,” I said.

“I thought you were my friend,” she gasped.

Me too, hon. Me too. And yet I can’t even stop drooling or fantasizing about your fiancé. I mean, what kind of friend is that?

Not a good one. I knew that much.

There was a knock on the door and she jumped up with a look of sheer bewilderment to answer it.

“Maybe whoever that is won’t be so rude and tell me I’m boring to my face,” she said.

“Would you prefer I said it behind your back?”

She shrugged. “What I don’t know, can’t hurt me,” she replied and opened the door, and oh how I wished that were true. How I was anything and everything she didn’t know couldn’t hurt her but that wasn’t how this worked. That wasn’t how any of this worked.

Kody walked in and looked at me with a spark in his eyes. A spark or annoyance. I couldn’t quite define it. Maybe it was both. And who could blame him? I was annoyed with myself. I was annoyed with how much I couldn’t control my words or my actions around him. I was annoyed with how much I thought of him despite trying to do the exact opposite.

The truth was…I was in love with him. I was head over heels for Kody Campbell, my best friend’s fiancé, and client. And no matter how much I denied it, or how much I tried to drown the fact in wine and Christmas cheer there was no doubt about what I truly felt. It didn’t even matter that I barely knew the guy, although in my defense every moment I spent with him I learned something new, and whatever it was I found out, only made me fall deeper for him.

“Hey,” Jenna said and he turned to plant a kiss on her cheek.

Why the cheek? Why did they never kiss in the mouth? Not that I was too eager to have a front row seat on a full French session but I’d never seen them act like a normal couple.

Then again there was nothing normal about them, was there? They didn’t live together, they weren’t exactly on the same page about their wedding, which in all fairness wasn’t that unusual, but they also hardly ever talked about each other. It was as if the other person didn’t exist unless they were in the room.

“You feeling better then?” Kody asked her.

Jenna pursed her lips and nodded. “Nothing like Momma taking care of her little girl,” she said and Kody smiled, taking a seat on the couch next to me.

Why? Why would he do that? Why wouldn’t he sit next to her? She’d been gone for a week. They should be all over each other.

“What brings you here?” Jenna asked, sitting back on the other couch.

I had to hold back a groan at these two. What did she mean what was her fiancé doing here? Why wouldn’t he stop by?

“I…I actually wanted to talk to you,” he told her.

Jenna raised an eyebrow. “Oh. Okay. Shoot,” she said.

Kody glanced at me and shuffled in his seat.

What was going on? Did he want to talk to her about me? Had he finally had enough and was going to tell her all the ways I’d been inappropriate since I’d met him? Was he going to ask her to fire me? To kick me to the curb?

“I was kinda hoping to speak to you in private,” he said.

I shot up and turned to grab my coat.

“I’ll go for a little walk,” I said. “Leave you two to talk.”

Before I could make my escape, Jenna jumped up and pushed me back to the living room.

“You don’t need to go anywhere. Can it wait until tomorrow? I kinda don’t want my friend to freeze to death in the middle of the night.”

Kody opened his mouth to say something but he just gave a small nod and smile and looked at the coffee table.

Was he also thinking of the time when we spent the whole evening making wedding invitations? Had he even had a good time or had he forced himself to be nice for my benefit?

“Anyone want a drink?” Jenna asked, going through her fridge and cupboard. “Shoot. We’re all out of wine. I’ll go get us some.”

“I’m okay. I’ll just have some tea or cocoa or something,” I said.

“Me-me too,” Kody said.

“Nonsense. I’ll get us some wine. We’re celebrating.”

We were? That was news to me.

“What are we celebrating exactly?” Kody asked.

Her smile widened and she clapped her hands together. “The fact we still have a cake order, of course.”

Was she being weird or was it my imagination?

I didn’t get a chance to figure it out because she’d put her shoes and coat on in record time and ran out of the door.

“Is she okay?” he asked me a moment later, still staring at the door.

I pursed my lips and shook my head. “Beats me.”

He licked his lips, rubbed his thighs and stood. “I’m going to make some cocoa. Do you want some?”

Oh, Kody. Stop it. Stop being so perfect. Stop being so sweet and caring. Stop being everything I’m looking for in a man. It’s unbearable. To have found the man literally made for me and not being able to do anything about it because he was taken. By my best friend no less.

“S-sure,” I said.

He flashed me that beautiful smile of his and walked to the kitchen to make the cocoa. I wanted to look away, to turn to my laptop, to escape into the bathroom, anything that wasn’t staring at his every move, but I couldn’t. I simply…couldn’t.

Whatever seemed to concern him when he’d come in seemed to vanish as he put the chocolate bars in a metal bowl over boiling water and got to work.

When he returned some five minutes later the house smelled divine and the cup of cocoa was the perfect hand-warmer despite it being warm already in the apartment.

“That’s really good,” I said as the notes of cinnamon, nutmeg and ginger hit the roof of my mouth and practically made me orgasm right then and there.

“Thanks,” he said.

I shook my head. “No, I don’t think you understand how good this is. It’s gooder than good. It’s perfect.” Like him.

Kody turned to me but never quite looked me in the eyes and smiled. “Th-thanks,” he mumbled.

Why did he have to be so shy? To be so cute and handsome? Why couldn’t he be an asshole? Why couldn’t he be a rude dick? Why couldn’t he be like every other groom of a straight couple I’d ever dealt with—not involved?

“I…” he said, still not looking at me. “I actually wanted to talk to you too.”

“You did?” I frowned.

What on Earth did he have to talk to me about?

Oh God, it was true, wasn’t it? He wanted to fire me, didn’t he?

That was okay. Maybe it would be for the best. Maybe it would be the kick I needed to get my shit together and leave and never come back. Because how in good conscience could I come back when the mere thought of him made me want to abandon my moral compass and risk it all for him?

“I did. I…I don’t know how to say this.”

I set my mug down and got in his field of vision. If he was going to kick me to the curb, the least he could do was look me in the eye.

“Quickly like taking a band-aid off,” I said.

“Isn’t that supposed to hurt more?” He also put his mug down and scooted closer to me.

Why would he scoot closer?

“I don’t know. Is there really a way to pull a band-aid off without hurting?”

“Yes. If you run it under water or rub some oil?—”

“What is it, Kody? What do you want to talk to me about?”

He leaned on the back of the couch making him inch closer to me and I bit the inside of my cheek to resist a taste of sin. To resist closing the distance. But if he didn’t say what he wanted to say fast I might not be able to control myself anyway.

“I…this is hard to say…I…” he started again and I huffed.

“Just do it, Kody. Just say?—”

Before I could finish my sentence he grabbed me by the back of the neck and kissed me something fierce. His lips tasted of cocoa and his tongue of ardor and I lost all sense, all self-control. I kissed him back. I brought my hands up to his head and threaded my fingers through his hair, pressing him closer to me.

My breath caught and my heart pounded so hard it threatened to rip out of my chest and my stomach did so many somersaults I felt like I was free-falling.

His mustache tickled my top lip but it only drove me wilder. It only made me kiss him harder.

But when I let out a moan, it knocked some sense into me. It gave me the clarity of mind and strength to pull away and I did.

I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t do anything for a moment.

And then realization washed all over me.

“Shit. What…what are we doing?” I jumped from the couch and put distance between him and me. I didn’t trust my body around him anymore. Not after what I’d done.

“Nova, I…I really like you. I think I’m in?—”

“No!” I shouted. “No! Don’t you dare say what I think you’re about to say. This is wrong. This is so wrong. Jenna is my best friend. She’s my best friend and I just betrayed her trust. I can’t. I just…I can’t.”

Kody stood and tried to follow me.

“Jenna will understand. I promise you. She won’t be mad.”

I stopped and glared at him. “Are you serious? What the fuck, Kody? What woman wouldn’t be angry that her best friend and her fiancé kissed? We both betrayed her trust.”

“We didn’t. You don’t understand. Jenna and I, we have an understanding. We?—”

I shook my head. “No. Don’t. Stop. I don’t care what understanding you and Jenna have. I don’t want to be part in any of this. I need to go. I need…”

I needed fresh air. I needed distance. I needed home.

I grabbed my coat and my shoes and ran out of the door. I managed to put one on while hopping on one leg and by the time I made it outside I was fully prepared to face the biting winter cold. I was ready to face that, but nothing else. Not my feelings, not my betrayal, nor Kody’s.

“I need to go. I need to go.”

I went in search of a taxi and kept checking behind me. Thankfully he hadn’t followed me.

So why, oh why did I feel even worse that he hadn’t come after me? Why did I keep jumping at any noise, hoping he’d appear behind me, tell me he loved and kiss me again?

What was wrong with me?

“Where to young man?” asked the taxi driver as soon as I found a car.

“The hell out of here,” I told him. “Just get me out of this town.”