Page 24

Caleb

Dinner at my parents’ house is going down as the most awkward in history.

“Pass Leo more potatoes, Little Bear,” my mom says.

I hand him the bowl without looking at him. Telling my mother not to call me Little Bear around Leo will raise red flags. She’s going someplace very hot when she dies. She doesn’t believe in hell and neither do I, but it’d be convenient now.

“Thanks,” Leo rumbles too close to my ear.

Mason spiked a fever during the worst drive in history.

A blizzard hit, and we almost didn’t make it.

There’s a travel ban in some areas, but fortunately, Leo found an earlier flight and missed the bad weather.

The desire to be with him, away from hockey, wars with the reality of him being in my childhood home. With my parents.

My mother decided Mason should isolate and take the guest room. The attic bedroom isn’t heated, so she offered Leo the spare bed in my room. I’m resigned to not sleeping tonight and spending the time staring at Leo like a tragic ingenue.

“You three should go into town and check out the festival of lights.” My mom waves her fork at me, Dad, and Leo.

“Mom, it has to be canceled with the snow.” I have never been able to hide things from her, but she can’t know about me and Leo already.

“Nonsense. The lights are already up, and we’re hardy people. This town won’t let a little snow stop us.”

“Six inches in an hour is more than a little snow, dear.” My dad pats her hand, but with the look she gives him, he adds, “But we can take the truck and at least drive around to check out the light sculptures they made this year.”

“Sounds like an adventure,” Leo agrees.

And that’s how I found myself as a grown ass man wedged in the truck’s cab between my father and Leo. I can’t even enjoy being pressed against Leo.

The truck fishtails around a corner, and I brace my feet with a hand on the top of the cab, but there’s no way to avoid falling on Leo. I swear he’s taking up more room than necessary, but I can’t call him out with my dad here.

“Here we are.” My dad turns off Main Street onto the section dedicated to the light sculptures. “It’s better to walk the path, but tonight we’ll stay in the truck.”

I can’t think of anything I’ve done to warrant such bad karma to be trapped like this.

“Who makes these?” Leo asks, taking in the baseball player throwing a pitch.

“Local companies sponsor one or more, and they have teams of people build them. Some are used every year. The lights attach to steel bases and are programmed in succession so it looks like the pitcher is moving.” My dad lets the truck idle as he explains.

“This one and the castle at the end have been here for a decade,” I chime in.

Leo looks ahead, and my dad drives forward. The lights reflect a rainbow of colors in the cab, mesmerizing Leo. This is something I take for granted, and it’s cool to see it fresh from his perspective.

My dad and Leo talk about the different displays and the mechanics of it, but I’m watching Leo.

Luckily, I can cover my stare by pretending to listen and taking in the sights.

The castle at the end of the road is two and a half stories high, and we can drive through it.

Dad stops the truck, so it feels like we’re in the center of a fairytale.

Usually, there would be a line of cars beeping at us, but the storm kept almost everyone indoors.

“Look, they’re still doing sleigh rides.” Dad points and drives in that direction.

“We’re not going on a sleigh ride.” I hear the panic in my voice.

“Those poor horses have to stand in the cold. We should let them get their blood pumping to keep them warm. There are plenty of wool blankets.” He side-eyes me as if he can’t figure out what my problem is. It’s my favorite part of the holidays, especially when it’s snowing. It’s like magic.

But I can’t be under a blanket with Leo and my dad. A guy can only resist so much.

“We can keep each other warm.” Leo nudges me.

I’ve entered an alternate universe. It’s almost as if Leo doesn’t care if my dad knows.

We park and trek through a foot of unshoveled snow to the man standing in a tiny booth with a space heater to buy tickets.

“My treat,” my dad says, handing over cash.

“Thank you, that’s generous, but I feel like I should pay since I’m imposing on your hospitality.” Leo has his wallet in his hand.

“Nonsense. Consider this included in your holiday package,” my dad jokes.

I have nothing to say. Maybe I have what Mason has, and I’m delirious from a fever.

Leo gets in the carriage first and lifts the blankets to get under. I step up next, and Dad’s phone rings.

“It’s your mom.” He answers the phone and nods gravely, checking his watch. “Your mom wants an herbal tea for Mason, and the shop closes in fifteen minutes. I’m going to get that for her and meet you back here.” He strides away.

I watch his back, wondering if I’ll snuggle Leo under the blankets like we’re on a date.

“You’re getting covered in snow. Get in.” Leo holds up the patchwork of wool.

I sit next to him, leaving several inches between us. The driver slaps the reins, and we’re off with a jerk. The motion somehow closes the gap between us.

“You seem tense,” Leo comments.

“Ya think?” I angle toward him, incredulous. “We’ve had sexual relations and no one can know, yet here we are all cozy like a date from my fantasy, only it’s a nightmare and you’re going to sleep in a twin bed a few feet from me. What part of this do you find relaxing?” I whisper-yell at him.

“Your mom said it’s an extra-long twin,” he says with a smirk.

I try to throw my hands up but just allow cold air under the blankets.

“Is this really your idea of a fantasy date?” He rests his palm on my thigh.

I shut my eyes. “This is too much.” It feels too real, like Leo wants to give me the date I imagined as a teen, as if we have a future.

Me and a guy cuddling under covers with big, fat snowflakes gently raining down on us as we sip hot chocolate and can’t keep our hands or lips off each other.

I always pictured doing this with a guy for some reason.

“I’m sorry.” Leo moves over, putting the few inches between us again.

Immediately, I feel the loss of his heat and the comfort of his touch.

“It’s hard for me not to want you when you’re this close.” I have got to learn how to filter my words. Leo doesn’t need to hear my sob story.

“I feel the same way about you,” he says quietly, and my heart skips a beat. “Tell me why you enjoy this ride.”

I blow out a breath. We’ve plodded through the field and are at the tree line. “It’s so beautiful with the snow on the trees. The stillness is peaceful, and I love listening to the crunch under the horses’ hooves. It’s an enchanted forest, full of possibilities and magic when you look for it.”

Leo hums in agreement, tipping his head back, then opens his mouth to catch a snowflake on his tongue. “I haven’t done that in over forty years.” His smile lights up the night.

“When it’s not snowing, you can see the stars through the trees, so it’s a different kind of magic.” I look up, but there are too many clouds.

Leo puts his arm around me, and my body melts into his.

Fuck it.

I can distance myself from him after this trip.

When I rest my head on his shoulder, he kisses the top of my head. “Show me your magic.”

We spend the remainder of the ride tangled together as I point out animal habitats, a few branches shaped like hearts, and tell him the stories I’ve made up about the markings on the trees.

“They’re probably for the maple syrup, but I like to think they’re directions to make sure your true love finds their way home,” I say, sighing, and snake my arm across his belly to hug him.

“I love that.” He squeezes me. “Thank you for sharing this. I can’t pretend I took an earlier flight solely to see my son. The lure of seeing your childhood home was too good to let a storm stop me,” he admits.

“Ugh, we’re hopeless,” I say dramatically, and he laughs.

“What if we let things happen and are careful?” Leo strokes the side of my neck.

Everything in me wants to say yes. How could I possibly say no to the man I’ve been obsessed with for years?

It’s worth it to have him now. I’d regret it for the rest of my life if I said no. I’m sure this is a temporary thing since he could never want me long term.

“Vermont is widely known as a place to keep secrets.” I tilt my head up, and he places a chaste kiss on my lips.

“Excellent. I forgot to return this.” He reaches into his pocket and hands me my bloodstone, then runs his hand between my thighs, but I catch his wrist and sit up straight.

“The start is over there.” I point and can see my dad waiting in the distance. The stone is warm in my hand from Leo, but I wish he’d kept it. I liked him having something of mine.

“We’ll have to continue at home.”

At home.