Page 16

Chapter 16

Jahmar

L ike the shameless flirt I am, I swing my hips as I walk into Anders’ bedroom; I’m not wearing this jockstrap for nothing. I’ve always had a perky arse but put me in a jockstrap, and you’d think I’d had a Brazilian lift. I feel it jiggle with every step I take. The “Jesus fucking Christ,” I hear Anders mumble under his breath, confirms my exit had the desired effect.

He’s so nervous tonight. It probably didn’t help that I blurted out how much I’m into him. I can’t help it though; he makes me want to do cartwheels and shake my arse like a pom-pom, preferably on his lap.

The only way I’m going to calm him down and give myself a real shot at getting to know him is to hand over some control. From what I’ve gathered, watching when no one knows he’s looking gets him off, maybe that’s what he needs tonight.

I pull the door ajar and flop onto the end of the bed so he can see me through the crack and shoot him a message.

Put the food on a low heat and come to your bedroom door. DO NOT come in. Just peep inside. You need to chill the fuck out, and I think I know how to make that happen.

I hear the buzz of his phone and smirk to myself. I really do have the best ideas.

Gentle footsteps approach the bedroom door, shooting a spark of adrenaline through me. I release my cock from the tight confines of the jockstrap and tuck it under my balls so I’m on full display. Anders lets out a tiny gasp when he sees me, but I resist the urge to look at him as he lingers at the door. My very own peeping Tom; how did I get so lucky?

I spread my thighs and drag my hand up my length in a loose grip, paying special attention to the end by gathering pre-cum and sliding it back down. The sound of Anders’ zipper almost makes me look again, but am I fuck spoiling the moment.

I brush my thumb over the end, shuddering as pleasure ripples down my spine. My toes curl as I tighten my grip and pick up the pace. I flinch when he spits, no doubt making his shaft nice and wet as he fucks his fist alongside me.

With my other hand, I haul up my top and pinch one of my nipples, twisting it this way and that. Every pinch makes my cock leak more. I can feel my orgasm swirling beneath the surface, sending pressure to my groin. My cock flinches like an eager racehorse at the starting gate, desperate to shoot off. I slow down and ease my grasp so I don’t come too soon.

After a few minutes of teasing ourselves we’re grunting and moaning in perfect sync. Fuck, I want to look up. In fact, I want him in here with me, doing the work. Answering my prayers, the door swings open, clattering against the wall.

“I’m sick of watching,” Anders growls.

“Come and get me then, little lion.”

He legit pounces on me, taking the air out of my lungs. No complaints here, though. He can eat me alive for all I care. Spreading my legs wider so he can slot between them, a giddy feeling travels from my chest to my cheeks. The way he fits against me perfectly does something to me. As our throbbing shafts line up and slip against each other, we howl out in uninhibited pleasure.

“Fuck, Jay,” he groans. “You have no idea what you do to me.”

Those words send fireworks through my soul. It’s given me all the confirmation I need that he’s in this fucked up thing with me, morals be damned.

“Oh, I know. Trust me. You drive me fucking crazy.”

I clutch the back of his neck and guide his mouth to mine. The kiss is positively feral. We kiss like we’re trying to consume one another, molding every fibre, including our DNA, until we’re one organism.

Our hips roll, chasing that blissful high, cocks leaking and creating a delicious, sticky mess between us.

“Jay, I’m going to come.”

“Yes, sweetheart. Come all over my cock. I want to be drenched in your cum.” My filthy words send him over the edge.

Anders’ whole body clenches and his warm release covers me. Each slippery thrust pushes me closer to heaven.

I reach down, grabbing our dicks in a tight fist. Anders whimpers from sensitivity, but I keep tugging at our lengths. My vision grows hazy as the dam bursts, and I coat us in more cum.

“Fuuuck,” I moan, eyes scrunched as I spasm through my orgasm.

“Ah, ah, ah,” Anders cries, grabbing my wrist. “Too sensitive.”

I chuckle, letting go. He collapses his weight on me and nuzzles the side of my neck, spotting light kisses all over me. After orgasm, Anders might be my favourite. He’s a mushy motherfucker.

I wrap my arms and legs around him, fully smothering him. The smell of our sex and his natural musk smooths the edges of the broken parts inside me.

Anders leans up, boxing me in with his elbows. “Thank you,” he murmurs.

“What for?”

“For helping me relax, I was acting like a weirdo before. I like you, Jay, but I’m scared of what that means. This isn’t how I usually go about starting relationships.”

My heart fucking sings. Finally. I knew I wasn’t going insane, and there’s something worth exploring here.

Anders’ cheeks flush, and he collapses, hiding his face in my chest. “Ugh, oh god. I’ve said too much. Now you’re gonna be all up in my business, more than you already are.”

I grab his chin, tipping it up to see those baby blues. “You bet.”

After our mutual orgasms and subtle love confessions were floating in each other’s presence. We lay in bed, petting each other and getting lost in cosy small talk about our lives outside of what we already know. We covered general interests, such as my addiction to smutty vampire books. He even admitted to having a nosey at my annotations—little shit.

Don’t get me wrong, I love snarky, ready-to-punch-me-in-the-face Anders, but it’s fucking amazing seeing a more relaxed side of him. It only makes me want him more.

“Shit, your stomach growled; I’m a terrible host.” Anders shoots off the bed and riffles through a drawer before chucking a pair of joggers at me.

“Thanks. I’ll happily starve if it means I get more cuddles.”

He pulls a face of mock disgust. “Ok, slow down, Mr. I don’t do soppy, let’s get that straight.”

“You say that now,” I mumble, climbing to my feet.

My arms wind around his waist, and I can’t help but kiss that dimple on full display.

“You’re so cute,” I hum against his cheek.

Anders wrestles himself away. “Oh god, I’ve created a monster.”

After shoving some clothes on, we finally make it to the table, and I swoon so fucking hard when I realise Anders’ cooked jerk chicken. And then I taste it. I desperately try to hide my displeasure, animatedly smiling around each mouthful. Did he even season it?

“Mmm…” I fake moan before taking a sip of water to hide my grin.

“Oh, fuck off. It tastes like unwashed arse.”

I splutter a mouth full of water, slamming my hand over my mouth to keep it in. Anders joins me in laughter and thankfully takes it on the chin; not everyone should be allowed to cook.

“It just needs a little more salt, pepper and every other spice and herb you forgot to put in.”

He swats me with the back of his hand and takes the plates away.

“I blame Femi; she told me to put a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Whatever the fuck that means. She didn’t actually give me any real measurements.”

“Sounds about right; she wouldn’t want you stealing her secret recipe. Plus, I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s been making it since she was a little girl, so I doubt she knows the recipe. My mum’s the same; she never explicitly told me what goes into most Caribbean dishes. I learnt by watching and some trial and error.”

Anders gets a wistful look in his eyes. “That’s actually very sweet. Sorry, I messed it up. Maybe next time you can show me.”

My chest contracts—there’s going to be a next time.

“I’d love to.”

After putting a frozen pizza in the oven, Anders comes back to the table, and I know we need to have a talk. As glorious and ridiculously romantic as this has been, I need to find out how he feels about what I do. I’m not finished yet; I have a few jobs scheduled, and it would be much easier to do them at the apartment. With Anders’ help, keeping a lookout, I could do these final operations at Emeralds and then call it quits.

He leans across the table, smoothing the crease in my brow. “You’re thinking pretty hard over there. What’s up?”

I take his hands in mine, dusting his knuckles with my thumbs.

“I need to know Anders, how do you really feel about what I do?” He knows what I’m asking without explanation, and I’m sure what he saw has been playing on a loop in his mind for days.

“At first, I was terrified. Worried I had a crush on a serial killer.” A nervous chuckle escapes him. “Then, when you explained, I felt relieved but also apprehensive. What you’re doing is extremely illegal, you could go to prison for the rest of your life. I kind of wish I never knew because now I’m an accomplice.”

“Shit, I’m sorry. I guess I didn’t consider what I was dragging you into. With the cameras and the thrill of what we were already doing, I got carried away. I’ve kept this a secret for two years, but with you, I felt like I could finally confess, even if I did it in a fucked up way.”

Anders gives me a weak smile. “Yeah, you just had to reveal your secret in the most dramatic way possible. I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.” He huffs a little laugh, and it settles me.

Thank fuck, he isn’t truly mad.

“You’re right. I definitely could’ve done it in a better way, but I guess that leads me to my next question.” I hesitate for a moment.

“Go on,”

“Are you going to tell anyone?”

“Of course not. Are you going to keep doing operations at Emeralds?”

“No, I’ve wanted to move on from this for a while. I still have three jobs left, though. I used to do it at a warehouse, but some homeless people started squatting there. That’s why I had to move it to my apartment. The night you saw me with the trunk was the first time I’d done it at home.”

“I see. So, after these jobs, are you done?”

“I am, but…”

“But, what?”

“I’m going to need your help getting them in and out. Could you keep an eye out and let me use the staff lift so I don’t bump into any other tenants?”

Anders pulls his hand away and runs it through his messy fringe. Fear takes over his face. I know what I’m asking of him is a lot, but what other choice do I have?

“I-I dunno, I’m scared, Jay; what if we get caught? I’m too pretty for jail.”

“Yes, you are,” I tease, poking his dimple even though it’s hidden.

“I’m serious. This could go to shit and completely ruin our lives.”

“I’m sorry for dragging you into this, but it’s almost over. Three more jobs, and we can put this behind us. Financially, I’m set. So if things go south, we can get the hell out of here; if that’s what makes you nervous, don’t worry; I’ll take care of you.”

“Woah, what? I’m not going on the fucking run. I like living here; this is my home.”

“Ok, ok, ok, it won’t come to that. We’ll be careful, and like I said, three tiny jobs, and we’re done.”

Anders nibbles on his nails, eyes darting all over the place before his shoulders sag and he gives in. “Fine, but we can’t get caught.”

I beam at him, leaning in for a chaste kiss. Fuck, I should hate myself for getting him mixed up in this, but the fact he is willing to risk everything to help me proves a level of devotion from him that I don’t yet deserve.

“So, you’re in?” I ask, needing confirmation one more time.

“I’m in.” He smiles before snatching my t-shirt and pulling me across the table for a brutal kiss.

I’m so close to finding peace and putting my ghosts to rest; with the help of this beautifully complex man, I'll get there.