Page 10

His eyes that are full of questions never leave my face. I look around because I’m afraid Zeke might see us. When there is no one else around, I feel better. I try to get away from Austin, but he won’t let me because he has a tight grip on my waist.
One of his hands leaves my waist to touch my left cheek. The feeling makes my eyes flutter shut.
His voice is hard, but his look at me is soft. I might have gotten a little bruise on my cheeks after the slap. I wish I could, but I know I can’t. I can’t even think of a lie.
“Please drop it,” I say softly. I beg with my eyes, and his gaze softens. He looks like he can’t decide whether to drop it or not. That makes my heart race. Does he care? Maybe a little bit.
“Please?” I say quietly. He shuts his eyes and then opens them again, nodding his head once.
He says, “Just this once,” in a low voice that makes it sound like he doesn’t want to. I feel like crying because I know there will be another time. When he lets go of my waist, I try to get past him, but he grabs my hand and raises his eyebrows.
“What?”
“Don’t you have class?” he asks. I look down at my feet.
“Let me go, Austin.”
I’m about to cry, and I don’t want to break down in front of him. He lets go of my hand and sighs tiredly, but he follows me instead.
I say firmly, with tears in my eyes, “Austin, go to your class.” He doesn’t listen. I start walking home without paying attention to him, my head full of what could happen next. Austin follows me to my flat and all the way to my room, but he acts like he doesn’t know me.
When I get to my door, I look at him tiredly.
“What do you want?”
He rolls his eyes and pushes past me to my flat, leaving my mouth open. He sits on the couch and pats the space next to him. I close the door behind me and stand next to him, not sure what to do.
With my hand on my waist, I say, “You’re creeping me out, Austin.”
“I had nothing else to do, so I thought I should keep my poor bunny company,” he says with a blank smile. I give him a dirty look.
He still sounds angry.
I look angrier.
“Okay, I just wanted to make sure you were safe,” he says with a sigh.
“Why do you care?” I ask in a soft voice. But I’m not complaining. I just want to know.
“Lyra, you are way too innocent for this world.”
I feel fuzzy on the inside.
I sit next to him and think about telling him everything, but I’m too scared to do it. If Zeke leaks the video, I’m in big trouble. My stomach is grumbling.
I know, I hadn’t eaten anything. When Austin looks at me sternly, my cheeks turn red.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t eat lunch,” he says with a sigh. I smile sheepishly at him, and he shakes his head and mumbles something I can’t hear. He takes my hand and pulls me out of my flat. I don’t ask him any questions and let him take me where we’re going.
I don’t want to say anything because I’m too tired.
When he doesn’t let go of my hand and holds it tightly, my stomach feels funny. I feel warmth all over. Do friends hold hands? Am I supposed to feel like this?
We end up at a restaurant where he buys me food. He won’t listen to me when I tell him not to. I love spending time with Austin, but I can’t stop thinking about the next day. Austin must have noticed this because he keeps staring at me, trying to figure out what was going on.
We go back to my flat after eating at the restaurant to finish the assignment. We end up seeing a movie instead. We’re almost done, and it’s evening.
I get up from my bed and walk to the door. “So, we’re going to the library to edit the essay tomorrow, right?” He hums softly and looks for something in my face.
I lean against the door and ask him, “What’s wrong?”
Austin stands up from my bed and walks over to me. “What’s going on, Lyra?” he asks.
“Tell me,” he begs, and my heart starts to race. I hold his hands and try to sound calm.
“It’s fine, okay? You said you would drop it.”
“Okay.”
He leaves the room and the flat without looking back. I smile sadly. How did my life end up like this?
Why do good people have bad things happen to them?
Or am I not a good person?
The next day, I throw up everything I ate for dinner. I’m pretty sure I have a fever. No matter what, I put on a light pink shirt and black jeans. I don’t eat breakfast and walk to school. I’m glad Kira doesn’t ask me anything. I feel dizzy and like my whole body is about to shut down, but I can’t skip school. I don’t want to take any chances.
Risks that have to do with the video.
I would do what Zeke said and go today.
Should I tell the police? What if Zeke finds out?
I met Austin at the library. He looks at me with worry in his eyes, which is the most emotion he has ever shown me. I smile at him even though I’m tired, hoping he’ll see that I’m okay. Even if I’m not. I can’t focus on the assignment, and Austin definitely sees it, but for some reason he doesn’t say anything. Time flies by, and I feel dread.
My heart starts to race a lot as I leave Austin and head to the classroom where Zeke is waiting. I feel like throwing up again, even though my stomach is empty, and my pace slows down.
I check to see if anyone is around before I open the door. I take a deep breath and open the door.
When I see Zeke playing with a knife, my heart drops. I take another deep breath and go into the class, closing the door behind me.
This school makes me mad.
I try to stop shaking like an earthquake, but I can’t. His pocket knife makes me shiver all over. Zeke doesn’t look at me and keeps playing with the knife.
He pats his lap after a moment, and I know what he wants. I put my bag on the table next to me and walk slowly towards him. My heart is going to jump out of my chest.
I often think about the worst things. I know it’s a bad habit. So, all I can think is that it will hurt to die if he kills me with the little knife.
Finally, he looks at me when I’m halfway there. His laugh echoes through the empty classroom.
He says in a threatening voice, “I’m not going to kill you, Lyra. Not yet.”
Not yet.