Page 21 of Off Plan

At that moment, I couldn’t give two shits how pheromones worked, or whether Dale was spewing sex hormones over the whole island. I caredverydeeply, however, about the sex hormones that were gonna be unleashedright in my damn carif Loafers didn’t move. I wasn’t sure which of us would be more horrified if that happened.

I leaned as far back as I could and elbowed him lightly in the gut. “Hey. What were you saying earlier about personal boundaries?”

Loafers ignored me. “Those supplements could even be dangerous.”

“Dangerous?” Dale bristled. “I’ll have you know, I’m a picture a’health. Just look at me! Your friend needs to mind his own, Fenny.”

“Right? Dr. Bloom—” I punctuated his name with a shove to his shoulder “—is gonna sit back down now.”

Loafers elbowed me back, exponentially harder than I’d nudged him. “Do youmind?” he hissed, likeIwas the one crawling inhislap.

“Yes, I really fucking do.” I pushed Loafers again, and he smacked my hand away.

“Mr. Jennings—” Loafers stuck his face out the window and leaned his elbow against my shoulder in the process.

“Ouch! Quit it,” I muttered, twisting away. “Get back in your damn seat!”

“I’m doing my job.” He turned back toward Dale with a broad smile. “What exactly did your doctor say?”

Dale frowned. “Well, he said they were sugar pills. But he wasn’t here when Barbara Patenaude nearly ran herself into the pump one time, ’cause my ferrymones overpowered her. So what does he know?”

“Dale. Was this before or after Ms. Patenaude’s daughter took her for cataract surgery?” I asked, cursing myself for getting involved at all.

“Cataracts got nothin’ to do with it,” Dale said stoutly. “Anyway, I wanted my doctor to test my blood, but since the bridge went out—”

“The bridge?” Loafers asked in confusion.

“Bridge to the mainland. Been gone… what, Fenn? Few years now?”

I nodded. Before my time.

“So we mostly do for ourselves,” Dale continued. “Oh! ’Cept that time when Gage Goodman cut his hand real bad and they sent a chopper. Remember that, Fenny? Took an hour. Thought Big Rafe was gonna have a conniption fit.”

“I remember.”

“Yep. So alls I can tell you’s what I know: I started taking the ferrymones, I felt better and stronger than ever, and Barbara wasovercome.” He smirked and adjusted his hat. “Pret-tee clear what happened.”

Loafers peered at Dale out the window, and his tongue danced at the corner of his mouth like he was deep in thought.

I sighed and closed my eyes. If I didn’t see it, it couldn’t tempt me, right?

That lasted two seconds.

“The thing is, Mr. Jennings, what if those pillsaresugar? No, no, hear me out!” he urged. “What if they’re not doing anything but boosting your ownconfidence, which in turn is, um… changing your biochemical—” Loafers waved a hand. “—signature patterns?” He cleared his throat. “And that, um, is causing you to become so—” He coughed lightly. “—irresistible?”

Dale lifted a skeptical eyebrow.

So did I.

“You mean I’m making the extra ferrymonesmyself?” Dale whispered, clearly intrigued by the idea.

“Not to put too fine… or accurate… a point on it…” Loafers coughed. “Yeah.”

I blinked, just a little bit impressed. Everyone on Whispering Key had heard Dale preach the good news about hisferrymones. Most of us ignored him, some folks called him a fool—because he was—but not a soul had thought to suggest that he was sexy enough without them.

“I see what you’re saying, Doc.” Dale tapped a finger to the side of his nose, and his little eyes focused on Loafers intently. “Alright, then. I could stop takin’ ’em on a trial basis, just to prove they work.”

“Good thinking.” Loafers nodded sagely. “I think you’ll find nothing changes!”